Fever
by Maitasun
Summary: After the battle of Trost, Eren and Armin get a little too close together and create a comfortable romance (but Jean says otherwise). Despite having a relationship, they still need to fight for their lives in a fierce battle with ambushes, backstabbing, and heartbreaks. Will Eren and Armin be able to pull through... together? Eremin. (Yaoi) Smut, language, etc. Further info inside.
1. I: Feverish Touch

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Shingeki No Kyojin. Most of the events and all of the characters used in this story do not belong to me. All rights reserved.

**_This fanfiction was written by me (Maitasun) and no other. Most of the events in this fanfiction are taken from the original plot with a pinch of the manga. Those events were combined with some of my own ideas, therefore creating the fanfiction that I hope you enjoy. This is an original fanfiction created by the original author (me)._**

**Note:** I know it's kind of slow in the beginning, but it just builds on the Eremin relationship. I decided to add some subtle hints of Jearmin/Riren every here and there with a little bit of jealous Mikasa (But the story is still mainly about Eren and Armin). I won't add any spoilers in the manga; This fanfiction stays within the borders of the anime. However, If I do add anything from the manga, I will add a warning at the beginning of the chapter. If you don't want any spoilers from the anime (Example, the Female Titan's identity), then don't read the fanfic. Shout outs to the anime only people *grin* I care. c: (I'll tell you again, pay attention to the chapter warnings. There will be a small manga spoiler every here and there; I'm just letting you know now.)

**Warnings:** Yes, this is a yaoi fanfiction that's mainly between Eren and Armin. Although the first chapter is fairly mild, it soon branches off into a story that contains eventual smut, violence, self harm, minor fluff, drama, and mild language (unless Levi comes to save the day). If there are any further warnings for certain chapters, it shall be added in a note at the beginning of the chapter. (And yes, there are minor side pairings, don't get too attached to them.) I'm just going to let you know now, what ever happens within the chapters will kick into effect later on. Don't think the side pairings and small scenes are just there to be there (filler), they're there because they're part of what happens later down the road (Like history, every cause has an effect).

**Basic Summary: **Armin sits beside Eren while he's knocked out after the battle of Trost, now questioning his own sanity and calling himself a coward. Once Eren wakes up, they get a little too close to each other, then break apart after one feverish touch. They start to build up on a comfortable romance with a few road blocks every here and there, but once the 57th expedition comes and goes, things start to get a bit crazy around the castle. However, regardless the situation, hearts are still broken and tears are still shed, but amongst that, roses are bloomed with white and silvery petals while the sunset glows a bit brighter than usual. With mysterious deaths, ambushes, and missing documents, Armin soon becomes stronger than he realizes. Yet at the end of the day... will he live up to the sentence 'If the reasons were good, I would die upon command'?

_**This was originally supposed to be a smut one-shot, but I really wanted to build up on an Eremin (Eren x Armin) relationship, so this fanfiction came to life.**_

**Tl;Dr?** Armin's more than you think, and a lot of shit is going on in between his epiphany, whether it be lethal or inspiring. Chapter warnings are your friends, I guess. It's a pretty long story, but it's woven together beautifully. If you like [long] graphic novels, then this is for you. (Or I guess you can consider it long, for the average fanfiction.)

**_Please leave a review! It'd be much obliged. I'd like to know what I can fix, or what I can add._**

**_Currently in progress._**

Enjoy,

- Maitasun

* * *

_**I: Feverish Touch**_

Is it truly a crime to murder for the ones you love? Is it even considered murder if the thing that is killed was not human, but a mere excuse of one?

A small gasp.

Is it a sin to watch as your teammates get ripped open and devoured in front of your very eyes?

Yet another thick tear.

Is it even considered human to welcome your lifelong love after watching him come back to life with his limbs renewed? Or was he even dead?

Shudder.

Would you still be considered human for allowing your love to risk his precious life? Allow him to die like the large number of unfortunate soldiers at Trost?

What considers you human?

_'But is__** he **__human?'_

Armin sniffled as his eyes leaked. He constantly blamed himself; What if Eren died? He most unwillingly rest his eyes upon Eren, who was sleeping soundly in his bed. The sunlight dimly shone through the curtains, giving the room a nice, soothing lighting. It did get Armin somewhat weary, but he had to stay awake for him. For Eren. Was it just sympathy that Armin needed? He constantly questioned his own dwindling sanity, but was it really worth it? All for Eren?

'_I...'_

He allowed his quivering hand to travel across the brunette's forehead, brushing the hair aside and revealing the hidden portion of his beautiful face. He was still young; He didn't deserve this. He didn't deserve such a coward of a friend. He didn't deserve to risk his life for one purpose only... humanity. Was humanity worth it?

_'Eren...'_

His hand weaved through Eren's soft hair. He felt the warmth of Eren in his palm and fingertips; What kept him so... alive?

'I..._Lo-'_

A perturbed twitch of the eye.

Armin immediately withdrew his hand and cursed himself. What the hell was wrong with him? He shouldn't be so torn up over one little thing... Or was this little? Was the battle of Trost really that little? He nearly got his comrades killed... he was even suicidal. No... what was more important now? Humanity or him? Eren or Armin? A fire seemed to burst to life in the blonde's heart as he watched Eren resurface. He was alive. Everything will be okay. A soft groan left the brunette's slightly chapped lips.

"Armin? Are you okay?" Eren asked wearily.

Armin's eyes widened. '_He cares for me?'_

_"_Why... why are your eyes red?"

"Nothing, Eren," Armin replied with a broad smile. Eren was okay, and that was the only thing that mattered to him at that moment. Standing from his seat, he said, "I'm going to go get you some breakfast. You've been out cold for a while now, I wouldn't be surprised if you're starving,"

Before Armin turned to walk to the kitchens, something gripped onto his forearm, pulling him back. His eyes widened as he jerked his head back towards Eren's. Their eyes met, turquoise and sky blue rekindling under a clothed sun. Nearly a century passed by; Was this forced?

It was only a mere second before Eren breathed, "Don't go... stay... stay with me,"

A soft scarlet blush splattered across the blonde's cheeks as those words slipped by Eren's lips. Was it because he actually... cared... for Armin? Or did the medication hit him too hard? That really didn't come up to him at that moment. Eren's grip was firm, yet gentle, giving him the unusual life-bearing heat that he felt only a few moments earlier.

With that said, Eren most unwillingly let go of Armin's forearm and rested his head back on the soft pillows. Was it truly the medication drop kicking him after a day's time? Armin sat back down in the seat beside Eren's sickbed as his face slowly filled with smoldering blood. Eren, asking a poor excuse of a soldier to stay with him? Protect him, maybe? One thing that Armin didn't realize was his perseverance and the fact that he was genuinely cunning. Knowledge, a gift that one can only ask for, a gift that does not come through innate ability.

But was he truly genuinely cunning, if he certainly thought himself useless to humanity? Or, more important, useless to Eren? Armin sniffled softly as the eye contact shattered. How badly he wanted to attack those lips, how badly he wanted to tenderly hug and kiss Eren with the passion he had. Another groan left Eren's lips, causing Armin to immediately respond with the usual raised eyebrow.

"I feel like I got trampled by a horse," The brunette muttered.

Armin couldn't help but laugh. Eren joined him with a small chuckle. For some reason, the blush on Armin's face simply refused to calm down. It was still a soft shade of scarlet.

"Where's Mikasa, anyways?" Eren asked.

"I'm pretty sure she's eating breakfast right now," The blonde replied. After a moment's pause, he added, "We were worried sick, you know,"

Silence devoured the two.

After what felt like ages, Eren propped himself up on an elbow to support his weight as he faced towards Armin. Yet another small spark between the two. To Armin's greatest surprise, the brunette was actually _blushing_. Was it because of Armin?

"I worry about you too," Eren continued, "But really... I'd be pretty lost if you weren't here with me, Armin,"

That finally broke it. What used to be a faint scarlet blush was now intensified as those words slipped into his ears. What was this feeling? No. Eren cares. That's all that matters, and now was the best time to shoot for that one thin silver lining.

"Eren?" Armin asked with an absent portion of mind, "What would you say to me having feelings... towards... you?"

The atmosphere was oddly warm as an anxious moment slithered by. Eren sat up on his bed and neared Armin. He, too, had an intense scarlet blush coated over his cheeks.

"Armin..." Eren muttered as the side of his hand brushed against the blonde's under chin. "What would _you _say to my feelings towards you?"

The blonde's heart skipped a beat or two as they both leaned closer to each other. Did his ears defy him? Eren has feelings towards him... something Armin thought impossible. Their eyes were half lidded, their lips having only a little over one inch in length apart from each other. Their breathing was now somewhat anxious.

"Eren," Armin whispered, "I... I lo-"

His sentence was interrupted by a warm embrace. Flames erupted throughout his body as his lips made contact with Eren's, his hand immediately tracing towards the brunette's hair and weaving through it once more. How soft his lips were, how welcoming they felt. Eren... cares for him... but what kept him so alive? They actually shared feelings towards each other...

What does this mean?

The kiss lasted only a short while. The air around them was now very warm and thick; Or was it just the blush? Their eyes were still closed, even after Armin broke away from the kiss. They rest their foreheads together, the blonde's lips still in the comforting warmth of Eren's, yet they weren't touching. Eren finally revealed his true feelings towards Armin.

What does this mean for them now?

"Eren," Armin breathed.

He instantly felt pressure on his shoulder. Eren's head slumped down from the blonde's face down to his shoulder, his forehead instantly heating the spot of which it lay. Armin's eyes widened; Did Eren really knock out? Right now, out of all times? The blonde carefully lifted Eren's head and felt his forehead; It was on fire. Not because of the blush.

Eren had a fever.

The brunette's breathing was no longer troubled, but now calm and easygoing. Armin laid Eren back down on his bed and stood up from his seat. He instantly felt guilt; Had he really taken advantage of this situation to steal a kiss from Eren's precious lips? Guilt was replaced with anger; Eren didn't have actual feelings for him. It was the sickness toying with his mind.

Or was it?

Armin felt truly confused. He walked towards the bathroom to retrieve cold water and a towel to place over Eren's head before he went to get medicine for the brunette's fever. However, his blush still refused to leave. The feeling of Eren's lips still lingered over his own; It was so warm, so tender, so full of... life. The smoldering sensation he felt when he kissed Eren... a simple kiss made him feel that way. Was this truly...

Love?

What is love? Was love the thing he felt now? The thing he felt towards Eren? Something he never truly felt for anyone else before?


	2. II: Rivalry

**Note: **The chapter contains some minor fluff and how bad of a potty mouth Levi can be when he's stressed. I guess you can say that the start of the Eremin relationship actually starts here, right? Aha.

* * *

_**II: Rivalry**_

It had only been two days. Two god forsaken days. Through those whole forty eight hours, he couldn't remember one single contact of heated lips? Armin hissed in disapproval of his own thoughts; The brunette was sick, it shouldn't matter. He went through a lot of things, but that doesn't exactly give him the proper excuse. Well, to Armin it did; He just adored the bastard. However, he wouldn't risk getting his ass kicked by Mikasa once she figures out.

_'Why the hell am I worrying so much?'_

He bit his lip.

_'It wasn't murder, damn it!'_

A strained groan left his lips as he stretched his aching back after what felt like hours hunched over a desk. The book he absentmindedly thumbed still laid unread in his other hand. At the end of his stretch, he gave the book one last doubtful look before tucking it away in his desk with the rest of the untouched books he retrieved from the library. He chuckled softly as he eyed the mass of books crammed into his desk. He meant to do some light reading, but for once in his life, he was actually _bored _with his books.

Hell, it would be such a luxury if he still had possession of the illegal books he read when he was a child. The books that contained information on the outside world; The world that Eren itched to see. He wanted to see the oceans of salt, as it was described in text. Armin let out a sigh before chuckling once more; Wasn't that the reason why they were here? His thoughts were interrupted as he heard the door behind him creak open.

However, despite his doubts, it really was Eren at the doorway. It shouldn't be a surprise to him, considering the fact that they shared a dorm like any other soldier, but for some foreign reason, it was.

"Hey Armin, we didn't see you at breakfast today. Where have you been?" Eren asked.

With a swift movement of the hand, he pulled out one of the crammed books in his desk and absentmindedly flipped it to a random page.

"I- I've been doing some light reading," Armin stuttered.

A low chuckle was heard from across the room.

"You call that disaster light? I'm actually starting to worry now,"

Armin couldn't help but smile. "What else do you need?"

The brunette gave a reproachful look. It was unlike Armin to try to speed things up like that.

"We're supposed to be out training with the others for the expedition that's coming up. Heichou would have our asses if we don't show up soon, and on top of that, Mikasa's starting to worry. She sent me on a mission to hunt you down,"

_'You're a bloodhound now, are you?'_

Eren turned his back towards the blonde and asked, "So are you coming or not?"

With a reluctant nod, Armin dropped the book in his hand onto the table with a rather loud thud. It's either now, or never.

"While we're there, I need to talk to you in private, alright?" Armin said as he stood from his seat. "And... you guys shouldn't worry too much about me,"

"It shows that we care, Armin," Eren replied with a rather soothing voice.

Armin shot a glare at his friend, taking him aback. "There is a huge lining that separates worry and care,"

**o0o0o0o**

Soft murmurs of chatter and the clanking of gear were heard as they neared the training area. Of course they wouldn't wait for just two soldiers that failed to get there on time. However, there was one thing that both teenagers feared; Corporal Levi.

"Where have you fucks been?" a voice snarled behind them, causing Armin to squeak softly in terror.

They turned to face a fuming Levi, who wore the everyday 'concerned' expression. Levi gave a small 'tch' as the two teenagers shuffled their feet in embarrassment. Hell, it was so out of place; Two soldiers wearing scared looks on their faces as they look _down _on him? He wanted to deliver a swift kick to both of them... especially Eren.

"Sorry, Heichou, it took us awhile to get down here," the brunette muttered.

"Saying 'sorry' won't fix anything, you god damn brat," Levi snapped. "Both of you get out there already. You need to get ready for the 57th expedition, and I highly doubt that any of you flying fucks would like to get eaten alive,"

_'It'd be such a charm if you managed to hold the curse words on your tongue instead of dropping them with every god damn sentence that comes out of your mouth,'_

"And what's with you, Arlert?" the raven asked.

Armin's eyes slightly widened in surprise; Was it just him, or did Levi read his mind? Levi let out a tired sigh as he pointed back towards the castle.

"Didn't Erwin say he wanted you to help him with the formation plan? Don't tell me you forgot,"

The blonde started to lose his patience with the Corporal for the first time. However... he couldn't disrespect him...

"S- Sir, I already went up to talk to the Commander, but he wasn't in his office," Armin said with a slight stutter. "He's probably b- busy with other business right now, it'd be best if I waited. Wouldn't it be disrespectful to bother him at such a stressful time like now?"

Eren's face enlightened. Way for Armin to make up a quick getaway, right? Knowing their Corporal, he'd swallow his pride and face defeat to a lower leveled soldier, considering the fact that he was tired and busy as hell. As true as it was, Levi clicked his tongue impatiently and turned on his heel towards the castle.

"Then hurry up here and get to business afterward," He excused with a rather tired rasp issuing in his voice.

With a sigh of relief, the duo walked off towards the barracks. Truth is, Armin _didn't _see Erwin at all. One utter of him not showing up, and Levi would have his ass for sure. Yet, for some reason, that didn't concern him now; He did tell Eren that they needed to talk. While they sneaked past the other soldiers, they slipped behind the barracks, but it was rather strange that no one saw them. Or, at least they thought.

"What did you need, anyways? If Heichou finds out that we were here instead of training, he'd skin us alive," Eren complained.

Armin paused for a moment. Sure he was an expert strategist and had an IQ that was better than most of the soldiers there, but frankly, he was clueless now. He couldn't just say 'give me my first kiss back.' It was Eren that he was talking to... _Eren_. His eyes widened... that may actually work. Now was the time to let out his true agitation with a simple sentence; He found himself grabbing a fistful of Eren's shirt (with a rather weak grip), which actually took _both _of them by full surprise.

"Give it back to me,"

"Wha-?"

"Give me my first kiss back!" Armin whispered with a more pleading tone than a harsh one that he intended to make.

A chilling minute's pause crawled by that felt like a year, or even a decade. The clueless expression that Eren had on his face was actually painful to see. He really didn't remember... might as well explain.

Armin released his grip and said, "I already know that you have no feelings for me as more than a friend, but while you had your fever, I ended up robbing your lips. I just... I... I want it back,"

"Armin,"

The blonde turned away from Eren in pure embarrassment. He shouldn't of said anything... so much for being an expert strategist, hm? So much for the master plan he made up. However, it could of worked. He didn't notice that Eren bit his lip... probably from embarrassment as well? Armin flinched softly as he felt a warm hand streak through his hair. What the hell was Eren doing? Was he trying to get his attention or merely mock him?

He turned to face a slightly blushing Eren. It's faint, but... he's actually blushing. Surely he didn't have another fever?

"You should of told me earlier than this," Eren muttered as his hand found it's way to Armin's cheek.

He cupped the blonde's cheek in his palm and stroked gingerly, strands of dirty blonde hair entangling in his fingers as he did so. Armin's eyes widened as the brunette did this. He was completely out of breath... it was as if he'd forgotten to breathe. As if Eren had taken his breath away from him.

"What I really want to know now is if you regret it,"

"Shouldn't I be the one asking you that question?" Armin laughed weakly.

A small pause.

"Well, I feel terrible for not remembering it. One hell of a fever, huh?"

Armin's hand found its way to the brunette's wrist and gripped softly. He pulled himself away from Eren's life bearing touch, which he thought was probably his Titan powers coursing through his veins. While biting his lip, he turned his face away from Eren once more, incapable of actually staring him in the eye without blushing. Anything but a blush, _please._

Another warm yet slightly wet feeling was felt on his cheek. Armin nearly jumped a mile as he stepped back a bit to face Eren once more. Surprisingly enough, Eren's slightly puckered lips sank back immediately as he bit his lip and gave a small grin. Surely he was holding back laughter.

"I didn't think you'd be so surprised," the brunette teased. "It's actually kind of cute,"

Armin felt his face immediately smolder in warm blood as a blush scattered across his cheeks. God damn you, Eren. He couldn't say anything at all... he was practically petrified. It was Eren that gripped his shoulders firmly, yet gently, and turned him back again.

"Is this the reason why you've been acting so strange lately? Over this little thing? It won't kill you to tell me. You can trust me,"

"It's not that I don't trust you," Armin muttered.

"Is it that you doubt yourself?" Eren nudged on.

God damn it. He was right... Armin _did _doubt himself. No matter what, his low self-esteem is what keeps him in check, his own self judgment that forced him to over think numerous situations.

_'Why is it that you care, Eren? Is it that you're my childhood friend, or is it because I'm one poor excuse of a soldier?'_

One of Eren's hands left the blonde's sharp shoulder and found itself back on his cheek. Eren skillfully slithered his hand up Armin's jawline and gently weaved his fingers through the dirty blonde hair. Eren tucked a small portion of the blonde's hair behind his ear, his eyes twinkling as he gave a soft smile. Armin's blush only intensified in a failed attempt at losing the brunette's gaze.

"You really shouldn't hide your face like this," the brunette whispered.

He dragged his hand along Armin's forehead, readjusting his bangs to where the strands of hair were out of his eyes. It was a different look for him... but it surely was fitting. The corners of Armin's eyes started to well with tears.

_'He cares for me?'_

"You're tearing up on me now?" Eren smiled. "How could you ever call yourself a soldier when you look like that? Sure your eyes may be blue, but seriously, the tears just won't fit you at all,"

"Why is it that you're so passionate now?" Armin asked curiously, blinking the tears away.

"Wasn't I the one that stole your first kiss?"

_'And I thought I was the smart one here,'_

"If anything, I should make it up to you, right?" Eren asked cheekily as his hand left Armin's cheek and cupped his chin.

Armin smiled weakly as they locked a gaze. What he wanted more than anything right now was to feel Eren's lips on his once more. As Eren bit his lip, he started to lean in. However, their moment was cut scarcely short.

"And I thought you couldn't get any gayer," A voice snickered behind them.

They spun around and faced he usual self centered asshole they had to deal with every day. Annoyingly messy hair, a smirk, and all. It was Jean Kirstein, who had made Eren his enemy the first day they met as trainees.

"What do you want, Kirstein?" Eren snapped.

"Shouldn't you be training like the rest of us instead of fucking about behind the barracks?"

The blonde bit his lip in embarrassment. Why, out of all people, did it have to be Jean? Yet... it _was_ better than Levi, now that he thought about it. He shuffled his feet impatiently as Jean folded his arms.

"No one wants you here, you pompous asshole," the brunette replied harshly.

"Hey Armin, why are you with Jaeger, anyways? Someone like you could meet _better people_," Jean said, slightly raising his voice to emphasize the last two words of his sentence.

Armin's sky blue eyes widened in surprise as he was addressed. He certainly didn't like this; He didn't want anything to start up between the two rivals. Hell, anything's better than a fight starting right now. Armin debated between leaving or persuading the two to stop. However, he wasn't given a chance to decide.

"Who the hell are you to tell Armin what to do?" Eren flared, "Now that I look at it, I finally see why Marco isn't anywhere near you anymore. He probably realized how much of a piece of shit you really are,"

That certainly hit close to home. Jean's haughty expression changed in almost an instant into a cold glare that he rarely gives anyone, despite his self centered thoughts. Armin hissed softly in disapproval; Of course Eren didn't know about Marco's death, no one told him. The brunette's eyes narrowed as Jean turned his back on them.

"Wow, Jaeger. I didn't think you'd have that kind of sick humor. That's an even lower level than I'd expect you to sink to. I wonder how people even consider you a fucking human," Jean muttered coldly.

Before Armin and Eren could say anything, he already left them in the dust, the once heated atmosphere now cold and heartless. Eren immediately felt remorse; Was there something that happened between Jean and Marco that he didn't know about? As he turned to ask Armin, the blonde already knew what his question was because of the look on his face.

"Eren, what the hell?" He hissed, "I thought someone told you this before, but... well, while you were resealing the gate with that boulder, Marco died. No one really knows how he died, but from what I've heard, his half eaten body was found by Jean a couple of days later. If you pay really close attention, h- he's changing... in some ways,"

"So you're telling me that I could of crushed him by that one simple sentence about Marco?" Eren asked dully.

"Well, yeah, if you think about it,"

Another hiss, but his time it was from Eren. He couldn't swallow his pride to go apologize to that self centered bastard. He gave Armin a pleading look, which the blonde understood.

"I'll go talk to him, okay? I'll meet up with you later," Armin said while walking away from him.

The brunette stood motionless for a second, now realizing what just happened. He basically confessed to his best friend, got interrupted by his rival, and now someone's probably going to cry themselves to sleep. A small tired sigh escaped his lips. How did he not know this until now? Before he could get discovered by Levi, he left the barracks, immediately finding a worried Mikasa.

He sighed yet again; He'll probably be bombarded with questions by Big Sister Mikasa, no doubt. Jean isn't that god damn delicate, is he? If anything, he should be worrying about the next expedition, not about Jean.


	3. III: Bitter Memories

**Note: **I don't really have any special warnings for this chapter, besides the mentions of JeanMarco and a hint of Jearmin. No, I don't really ship them, which is why I don't add such a huge hint of romance... more like friendship at the moment. But it'll lead up to some stuff later down the road. *shifty eyes, shifty eyes*I know It's a pretty short chapter, I'm sorry! I just had to get this out of the way; I had to type it down, and this was the perfect time.

* * *

**_III: Bitter Memories_**

It didn't take long to find Jean. He was in the nearest empty hallway that Armin found, and to his surprise, he seemed perfectly fine. Or, at least he was pretending to be. Jean only leaned back against the cold wall, his thoughts lost on Marco. Why did Marco have to die? What did he do to deserve such a ruthless death? He didn't even notice the footsteps coming down the hallway towards him.

Armin was unsure about whether he was being ignored or not. It was unlike Jean to be like this; He was usually socializing with various soldiers instead of keeping to himself. The blonde already knew that it was the death of his best friend that made his personality change. Hell, he even joined the Survey Corps. After all that time he spent talking about joining the Military Police and living a comfortable life in the inner walls, he let that dream go to waste and hide in the corner of a dark room, never to be brought up again.

Marco's words echoed throughout his thoughts like it did at the campfire; _'I hope you don't get mad when I say this, but you aren't a strong person. So you can relate to how the weak feel. In addition, you excel in sizing up any situation. Isn't that why you immediately know what should be done?'_

He was still unsure whether it was a compliment or an insult. Or was it both? To him, what should have been done was saving Marco and getting the hell out of there, or maybe even giving his own life for him. However... not all are as 'eager' to die as Marco. Was it a mistake joining the Survey Corps?

Silence finally broke to pieces.

"Jean, are you all right?"

Jean turned to greet the worried blonde, "Don't worry about it,"

"There's a very big difference between worry and care," Armin retorted.

There was a small pause. He debated between smacking the little shit or praising him. The taller male left his stance against the wall and stood up correctly. There was only one other thing that he had in mind at that moment... and it was Armin.

"What do you see in Jaeger, anyways?"

Armin stood rooted in his spot, completely paralyzed. Was it really Jean that asked him that question? He didn't know how to answer.

"What I see is humanity's last hope and my best friend. You see... he's not exactly the type of person to get along with people who insults him, his family, or his friends," the blonde continued, "and it wasn't his fault for bringing up Marco... he really didn't know. I'm so sorry,"

"Why are you apologizing if you did nothing wrong?"

That was true... why was he apologizing for another person's mistake?

"It's b- better that I acknowledge it instead of brushing it off my shoulder like nothing happened," Armin muttered, turning away as he did to Eren.

Jean stood there biting his lip for a moment before placing a hand on the blonde's shoulder. He earned a sharp intake of breath from Armin, as if he was waiting to receive a painful blow. Instead, he received a very gentle shake that signaled for his attention.

_'You don't have to touch me in order to get my attention. It's really embarrassing, damn it,'_

"Armin, not a lot of people are as eager to die like him. The reason why he died... was it for me? Did he really die young for me instead of living a peaceful life as part of the Military Police like he wanted to?" the taller male breathed. "He always said that he saw great potential within me... that I could be a great leader someday. If I lived up to that title... would he have been proud of me?"

Now isn't that quite foreign? It's unlike Jean to come out like that, to practically break down into pieces within the single sentence or two. Before Armin could say anything, Jean gripped both of his shoulders and held him both firmly and gingerly on his spot. He could see thick tears swelling at the corners of the taller male's eyes. It would have been better if he hadn't brought up Marco in the first place.

"Is that the only reason why you joined the Survey Corps? Were you planning to let him live on through you by doing so...?" Armin asked, "Is... Is that why you've b- been weeping? There's no reason for you to cry; His death wasn't in vain... you're a pretty smart guy, and you immediately know what should be done while you size up the situation,"

Wasn't that the same thing that Marco said at Trost? This was yet another thing that hit _very _close to home. He didn't want to break down in front of Armin... but how many times has he seen the blonde cry before? It was still out of place... all he could do now was hold back tears and try to pass it on as a joke, at the very least.

"Who said that I've been crying? Sure I miss the guy, but come on now. I became a soldier knowing that I'd lose the people that I know and love," Jean laughed awkwardly.

Armin instantly saw through this pass and decided to play along. He gave a devilish grin and asked, "I see... so you loved Marco, hm?"

He paused for a moment. Did he really 'love' Marco? Love couldn't possibly be the emotion that Jean felt towards his deceased friend, could it? To the blonde's relief, Jean released the grip on his shoulders and blushed softly in embarrassment.

"I'll be completely honest; I don't really know, myself... but... I guess you could say that," Jean muttered under his breath.

"Don't worry about it... it's all right. I know you miss him, and I shouldn't of brought him up without your permission like that," Armin said with a rather soothing voice.

Jean didn't expect an overall apology. It wasn't Armin's fault, nor should either of them worry about it. It's true, he did miss Marco, and he still remembers the day of grief. He appreciated the blonde's concern towards his emotions and decided to show it off in a certain way.

"Hey... thanks," the taller male said as a soft smile ripped across his lips.

"Anytime, Jean,"

Before Armin had the chance to turn around and walk out of the hall, he felt something both soft and warm come in contact with his skin. A shiver was sent down his spine at the sudden contact, resulting in a smoldering blush erupting on his cheeks.

_'Did... Did he just kiss me...?'_


	4. IV: Between Dreams and Promises

**Note: **I'm quite proud of the way I ended that last chapter. Watch out, Armin c; Anyways, the only 'special' warning I have for this chapter is: It contains Levi. That's all I need to say, haha. Some shit does go down with Annie and Armin, and it's actually quite entertaining (to me). There's also a little Rivetra that's hinted in the beginning of the chapter... I'm just throwing the different pairings all over the place, aren't I? Deal with me ;)

* * *

**_IV: Between Dreams and Promises_**

Erwin ran his hand through his blonde hair in one swift motion, showing complete stress and frustration. He sighed while a fuming Levi crossed his arms.

"We're not waiting for anyone. It's not like we have all fucking day, we need to discuss this _now_," the raven hissed.

"I don't know where Arlert is, but he told me he'd be here today,"

_'So the little shit decided to lie to me, did he?'_

"Anyways, forget about that now. Will Eren be with you during the expedition, or will he be in front with me?" Erwin asked.

"I don't care who he's with, just get it done and over with. We need to get this formation plan done, to the point where even _you _won't make any changes," Levi replied wearily. "I don't care what you say; Whether he's riding with you or me, the Special Operations Squad is still going to be guarding him at any cost, so don't try putting them in the communication lines with Ackerman,"

"I thought you'd say that," Erwin sighed, scratching out a side note that was written in the corner of the formation plan. "Eren is staying with you and the Squad in the center of the formation, then. You should stay within the eye's sight of me ahead of you, and Ackerman should be towards your left hand side,"

"Where are we in the center?"

"That's for you to decide," the blonde grinned.

_'Are you seriously taking this as a joke? Quit giving me that cheeky grin, you ass,'_

A gentle knock was heard across the room, catching only Levi's attention.

"Corporal?" A soft voice called through the door.

"Come in,"

As the door creaked open, Petra sidestepped into view. She stayed unnoticed to Erwin, who was still too busy looking over the formation plan and scribbling down various names under the squares located around the paper. The Corporal bit down on his lip in frustration; Sure he said he wanted to talk, but why now out of all times? After finishing a small note he was scribbling under a box towards the back of the formation, he looked up and spotted Petra. He then looked over to Levi and gave a devious smirk.

"I just remembered that I have a huge stack of paperwork back in my office just itching to be signed. Why don't you discuss this with Petra while I'm gone?"

Levi gave the blonde a look that basically said '_you son of a bitch.'_ Erwin bit down on his tongue to stop himself from laughing aloud; He knew that Petra had a crush on the raven, and Levi certainly didn't want to get her hopes up. Truth is, he showed only mild interest in her, but there _is _a huge difference between interest and affection... right?

"Oh, did I interrupt something? I'll leave if you want, I'm sorry," Petra apologized, hesitantly gripping the doorknob.

"No, it's fine," Levi croaked, ignoring the amused look Erwin gave him before pushing in his chair and walking towards the doorway. "Why don't you sit here with me? We could talk for a moment,"

"Yes, that would be nice," Petra smiled.

As Erwin closed the door behind him with a sharp snap, Petra took a seat in the empty chair that sat in front of Levi's desk. For some reason, it was tense between them; Reasons unknown to the raven. She shuffled her feet in embarrassment, completely forgetting why she came in the first place. Was it really Levi that made her like this?

"I did say that I wanted to talk to you earlier," Levi continued, "and I'm only going to ask you this: Are you sure you're willing to put your life on the line for that shitty brat?"

Petra hesitated for a moment; She had to pick her words carefully. "Heichou, if I wasn't willing to risk my life for the sake of humanity, then why would I be here now, talking to you?"

The raven let out a soft groan that signaled his fatigue. "You know you don't have to die young for him. You're a very skilled soldier that has much to look forward to in your life. Are you even wary of a bloody death?"

"If it's for you, then no,"

There was a moment of tensed silence between the two. The raven debated between kicking her out of his office right then and there or brushing that last sentence aside as if it was nothing. However... he didn't want her to die at all. It's true, she _is _young; She's much more than he could ask for. Hell, why is he even thinking these things anyways? He's much older than her, there's no reason why he should be taking an interest in her _at all. _Sure they worked together in a couple of other missions, but it should stay that way; Corporal and soldier.

"You can back out at any time you want. I won't say no and I won't stop you. For all we know, you could die on this mission," Levi pressed on.

"Heichou, why are you only giving me this option and no one else?" Petra asked with a small, innocent tone in her voice.

_'God fucking damn it, fine, I'll tell you what you want to hear,' _He took a sharp intake of breath. _'Or is it actually what__** I**__ you to hear? What I want you to __**know**__?'_

"It's... It's because I... _care_," the raven reluctantly spat out the last word in his sentence.

As those words slipped past Levi's lips, a faint scarlet blush dusted onto Petra's cheeks. She found it _cute _that Levi would actually swallow his pride long enough to share his feelings. Levi questioned his last sentence; Did he really mean it? He didn't want to get too close to his soldiers; He's made that mistake before, and he certainly doesn't want to do it again. Heartbreak just _won't _be the reason why he dies in battle. He can't distract himself like that. But... it _was _Petra.

"I'll never back out from something like this, trust me," she smiled again.

_'You want me to trust you? I wonder how many people that I cared for told me that before - three, four? I'm a goddamn jinx, you dumb ass, can't you see that?'_

"Heichou, I wanted to give you this, but..." Petra's blush intensified as she took out a locket that was tucked into her shirt. "It was a present that I wanted to give you, but I decided that I'll give it to you after the expedition-" Levi's eyebrow raised in suspicion, "- and it'll only return to you if I'm alive. I promise that this will get back to you, no matter what,"

Levi's eyes widened. _'Why the hell are you promising such things to me? Even if it sounds reassuring, it's so fucking bitter. Why not someone younger, someone who's willing to show their interest... someone who would show the warmth on their end without being too scared of losing you? I learned better, didn't I?'_

"I'll hold you to that, you better remember it," Levi muttered coldly.

He heard a small giggle come from the woman as she tucked the locket back into her shirt. She was giving a warm smile... was it because she was content, or was she just mocking him? Petra knew that their conversation was done, so she stood up from her seat and proceeded to walk towards the exit. However, she was wrong.

"Petra," Levi called again.

"Yes, Heichou?"

"Promise me that you'll come back alive," He said with a rather hoarse voice.

Levi's eyes widened slightly in surprise; She turned around, folded her left arm behind her back and used the other hand to form a fist right above her heart. A soldier's solute, coming from Petra.

He knew he had that promise.

With that done, she giggled and grinned cheekily at him; She was the only person that could get away with that. Levi admired the look she gave him; She seemed just so happy. Once Petra closed the door behind her, the raven let out a tired groan and placed both arms upon his desk, being careful not to wrinkle or scatter the paperwork in front of him. He allowed his head to droop onto his folded arms; He needed some rest.

It's been too long since he's had a decent sleep.

**o0o0o0o**

Armin stood rooted to his spot, taking a rather long time to process what just happened. His hand immediately found its way up to his cheek on the point of impact to investigate. Did Jean just kiss him? He felt the blush on his hands; He cursed himself for it. Jean grinned at this reaction. He sidestepped the dumbfounded blonde and started to walk off towards the end of the corridor.

"Isn't it about time we got back to training? Heichou will kick our asses once he finds out that we're gone," the taller male called back cheekily.

The blonde fumed silently. Was that bastard really going to try to pass this as an ordinary conversation? He felt angry, confused... surprised. Why the hell did Jean have to kiss him? Jean hid his face in pure embarrassment; The blush he was wearing was already intensified enough as it is. If anything, someone would mistaken him blushing with him getting a high fever. He questioned why he did it. He allowed Marco to flow back into his mind, thinking, 'What would he have done at a time like this?'

_'It was probably just an accident, right?' _Armin sighed. _'Yes, Armin, he kissed you on accident. I'm so bright, aren't I?'_

On the way out towards the training area of the castle, he saw someone leaning against one of the cracked stone pillars. That couldn't be Jean, could it? No, it can't be... He would have been long gone by now. As he made his way towards the unknown person, blonde hair came into view. It was help up in a bun, despite being short enough as it is. It couldn't be...

_'Annie? You're not part of the Survey Corps... why would you be here?'_

She noticed the soft footsteps echoing behind her and cocked her head back towards the new visitor. Annie wore a stone cold look on her face as if she was expecting someone else; Anyone but Armin. Her facial expression softened at the sight of him; For some reason, she was relieved to see the other blonde. Why was that? Might as well socialize with him while he's still here, right?

"Everyone else is out training for something... why aren't you?" Annie asked, her tone very close to 'innocent.'

"I got caught up in something else a few moments ago," he replied, "and why would a Military Policewoman be hanging out down here instead of protecting His Majesty within the inner walls?"

Annie tried her hardest not to laugh. "The king is all but trustworthy. We have a corrupted government and you know it,"

"Are you saying you regret joining the Military Police?" Armin asked.

"Not entirely," she sighed, "Although the peaceful life within the inner walls is relaxing and all, it would be nice to put those three years of training to good use. You know, fighting Titans, coming back alive when you should of died,"

Armin glared at Annie as she gave a devilish smirk. She knew what happened that day between him and Eren, did she? That bastard. Armin ignored the look she gave him as she left the pillar and strode towards him.

She stopped at his side and rasped, "If you were ordered to die, would you do it?"

It felt as if a millennium slithered by.

"If it was for a good reason, yes," Armin finally replied.

Annie let out a cold laugh as he continued to stride away. She knew Armin was weak, and she knew that he would of said yes. However... he does have strong willpower, even if he lacks the physical strength. Why did he even join the Survey Corps, anyways? The blonde formed a fist at his side in frustration. Why was Annie like this? As she turned the corner, he let out a soft sigh.

He didn't want to come back in a foul mood, however, thinking of something positive was going to be tough. With a small gasp, he remembered; _Erwin. _He completely forgot about the Commander. A slight ray of panic ran through him before he realized that he was probably too late anyways.

_'Might as well show up and see what I could help with,'_

With a small sigh, he turned back around, and started to head off towards his Commander's office.

**o0o0o0o**

_"It's really pretty, isn't it, Levi?"_

_A white rose fluttered delicately in the pot that it was in. The dirt around it was rock hard, however, it still managed to blossom just as beautifully. It was strong, yet gentle; The petals around it shook in tempo with the cool summer breeze as if threatening to fall apart. It truly was beautiful._

_"Do you want to give it to your Mother? She'll love it," A small voice whispered excitedly._

_Levi stared at the rose with clouded eyes. He was still tired from the hours he spent working, and now he was finally given a time to rest. With an absentminded nod, he picked up the pot with care, as it was already cracked and threatened to shatter. He stood up and turned his head towards the young girl that was standing beside him._

_"I wish I had one like that," She smiled._

_The smile she gave him was much too warm._

_'How could she be so happy when she's living a life like this? A poor life as an orphan?'_

_"Then why don't you take it?" Levi asked._

_She turned shook her head. "I have something to give you, but it'd be put out of league with a beauty like that,"_

_The raven's eyes widened. It was rare that he was given something in his life. Especially from another child his age... hell, she was an orphan. What could an orphan possibly have to give him? He felt terrible at the very thought of it._

_"I'll give it to you later, I promise,"_

_"I'll hold you to that promise; Remember it," Levi grinned._

_With that said, he took her hand in his and scurried off into the crowded roads. He was happy that he was able to give something to his mother; Something beautiful that she may actually enjoy. Her hazelnut hair bounced behind her beautifully, despite the fact that it was messy and contained tons of tangles. Levi liked that fact about her; No matter what, she was beautiful, just like the rose he carried along with him._

_They stopped in front of a very shabby looking house that was covered in mold and creaked threateningly with each breeze that brushed past it. This was Levi's home; Although it was a terrible environment for a child to live in, he still loved it all the more. He let go of his friend's hand and held the pot close to his heart._

_"Do you think she'll like it?" the raven asked excitedly, walking towards the door._

_"I'll wait here for you, tell me what she says," She smiled once more, this time a small blush scattering across her cheeks._

_"Are you sure you want to stay here?"_

_"I'll wait here no matter what. Hurry, though... It's getting cold out here,"_

_'Why are you so eager to stay outside?'_

_Levi nodded vigorously and reached a hand out to the front door. As it creaked open, he sidestepped inside, and peered around for his mother._

_"Mother?" Levi called._

_Instead of hearing a response from his mother, he heard a piercing shriek from outside. Not from a woman, but from a carriage. What would a carriage be doing here at this hour? He winced at the terrible noise and turned to investigate; However, his heart stopped when he gripped the rusted doorknob; She was outside waiting for him in the street._

_In the god forsaken street._

_He wrenched the door open with renewed fear, not from the thrill of the crash itself, but because of one thought; Did she get hurt? Levi didn't even bother putting the pot down in the first place, nor did he care where his mother was now. She wasn't outside before, so she was safe. At least he hoped._

_As soon as he stepped outside, his eyes widened at the sight; A carriage, turned onto it side and slightly cracked down the middle with a missing door, the horses writhing in pain as blood poured out from their wounds, and a twitching body that looked like the driver. The man who had been driving had his arm bent in a rather disgusting angle, and his clothing was absorbing blood from the pool in which he lay in. Levi couldn't handle the view of the scene, he had to turn away..._

_Until he saw her._

_Her body lay a couple of meters from the scene, covered in blood and completely limp. Her already matted hair was even worse than before, containing small wood chips from the carriage and specks of blood. She wore a cold, expressionless look on her face with a small trail of blood pouring from the corner of her mouth. Levi couldn't help it; He ran towards his fallen friend, hoping that she'd get up again. That this whole thing was just a joke. God, let it be a joke. As he neared her body, his heart rate increased. She was turned upright, and her eyes were still open; The once beautiful light brown iris she had was now clouded with darkness. This couldn't be._

_"... Why are you laying there, you idiot?" Levi croaked, "You're going to catch a cold if you don't get up soon,"_

_He gained no response._

_"Quit playing with me already... get up..."_

_A light breeze brushed over her hair, masking her bloodied face with a bright hazelnut cover._

_"Stop it,"_

_Levi clenched the pot tighter to his chest, completely ignoring the crowd that has now gathered at the scene. Why, Death... Why have you come to collect so early? As tears started to cloud his vision, he saw something glint in her hand. He blinked the tears away; He had to stay strong, he couldn't cry. Levi allowed his curiosity to get the better of him. He stooped down and opened her hand._

_In her palm lay a locket. With trembling hands, he took the locket from the palm of her hand and stood upright again. Tucking the pot away under his arm, he clicked the locket open. His eyes widened as he read it's contents._

_'You were always special to me. They tell me I'm too young to marry, but I don't care. How do I say this? I love you, Levi,'_

_As soon as Levi read this, he clenched his eyes shut; He felt his face smolder almost painfully as thick tears welled up in his eyes. As a tear slid down his cheek, he noticed something; It's been too long since he cried. It almost felt comforting... it almost felt... __**good.**_

_"Did you know this girl?" A deep voice rasped behind him._

_Levi sniffed and immediately wiped the tears away from his eyes. No one can see him cry, none but her. He turned slowly to face a tall man, who looked no older than twenty, and noticed that he wore a soldier's uniform. This man was a soldier? His eyes traveled from the slick blonde hair onto the slightly torn clothing (from the accident, no doubt). He also noticed that his lip had a deep cut, which the blonde had been licking to clean off the blood. Besides that, he looked well-fed and sculpted... surely he wasn't from the Military Force?_

_"Yes," Levi replied with a shaky voice._

_"I'm so sorry for you. From what I've heard, this girl... her name was Petra Ral, correct?"_

_The pot that was tucked safely under his arm immediately dropped to the floor and shattered loudly._


	5. V: Big Brother

**Note: **You now know the main reason why Levi doesn't trust himself with starting a romance, whether it be a boy or a girl. No, I won't mention her real name until later, but she'll be kept as "Her" or "She" for now. I know it was quite annoying, but hell, it would of ruined the ending a bit (in my opinion). But, as you can tell, it's just a dream. Even if the way he woke up was rather disturbing (Levi, you clean freak,) It was still one hell of a way to end the chapter. Yes, i'll let you in on a little secret... It leads to further Rivetra. It's just a small part in the story, though... don't get your hopes up with an extended romance with the two. Yet it does lead to things a little more... intimate... later on (and I'm sure you know which pairing comes in then, yet it's not so romantic as you'd hope). I suck with romance... I guess I'm doing quite well for a beginner (in writing fluff/romance).

I don't really have any special warnings for the chapter, besides that this one, too, contains Levi (language). You also get a little slap of Levi's past when he met Erwin as the village thief (no, not the village idiot). The 7th chapter is going to be splashed with feels... the 57th expedition was emotional Q_Q deal with me. However, the next chapter is just some shit that happens beforehand... a little Eremin for you. Just letting you know now *ahem* Rivetraa ... :c

* * *

_**V: Big Brother**_

"What the actual fuck?"

Levi's body jerked at the sudden crashing sound than came from the front of him. Numerous papers scattered from under him, slowly drifting to the floor in three or four graceful strokes. His eyes were still blurry from grogginess, denying him a clear vision of what was happening. He sat up a stretched, all while rubbing his eyes sleepily.

"You're finally awake," A voice rasped.

With a soft groan, he removed his hands from his eyes to face a devastating sight (to Levi); The ground was covered in dirt, pebbles, and shards of broken glass. It was as if that dream had actually come to life. Levi knew better than to panic because of the dream, but it just seemed so _real,_ and this situation didn't help with his building panic. It was unlike humanity's strongest soldier to panic.

"Erwin, you fuck ass, what in God's name did you do?!" Levi groaned uneasily as he got to his feet and headed towards the cleaning supplies he kept in his office.

"Calm down, Levi, it's nothing to worry about, it's just a small mess. We can clean it up easily, and it's not my fault that you happened to leave a vase unusually close to the edge of your desk," Erwin stopped for a moment, hesitating about the next sentence he was going to say. "However... _you_ knocked the vase over after muttering something in your sleep. You were having a nightmare... am I correct?"

The raven stopped dead on his tracks; How the hell did Erwin know this?

"A nightmare?" he idly asked.

"I was going to talk to you about the final draft of the formation plan, but you were careless enough to fall asleep on your desk. You were muttering something under your breath... 'Mother', if I heard correctly,"

Levi turned his head back towards the blonde and gave him an icy stare, taking him aback. It was unlike Levi to give anyone that sort of look. He rarely gave it to anyone, not even Eren. Erwin cleared his throat behind a fist and tried to avert his glare.

"For fuck's sake, Erwin, don't do that, I feel like a shitty criminal," Levi finally sighed.

"Weren't you a mere criminal around the time we met?" Erwin grinned.

Levi turned his head back towards his direction and allowed his eyes to fall to the floor. He still remembered the second encounter he had with Erwin.

**_._**

**_._**

_"So you're Levi, right? I've heard of you. Aren't you the village thief?"_

_Levi bit his lip. "Sir, it's unlike a soldier to care about small things like that,"_

_"It's unlike any other soldier," Erwin smiled, "but it's quite like me to care about someone who's lost a person dear to them, no matter the age and no matter the rank. Isn't that the reason why you started your small crime wave?"_

_"What makes you think she was dear to me, anyways?" the raven shot back at him._

_"I'm sorry, but I'm pretty sure I saw a tear or two run down your face that day,"_

_The boy turned his head away in embarrassment. "It doesn't concern you if I am a thief or not,"_

_"No, I'm quite sure it concerns me. Think of it, kid; What if you were a soldier hearing from the inner walls about some teenager causing troubles somewhere down in the outer walls?"_

_"You make me feel quite famous, sir,"_

_Erwin chuckled softly._

**_._**

**_._**

"It's not like I'm proud of my past," the raven hissed, finally grabbing a broom that lay untouched next to his wardrobe.

Erwin bit his lip uneasily. "Anyways... why don't I show you the formation plan after you clean this up?"

Levi allowed a growl from the back of his throat to surface, weakly signaling his approval.

**o0o0o0o**

"So you're telling me that you trust Kirstein alone with Braun and that one bitch - what's his name?" Levi groaned.

"They're capable of much more than you think," the blonde pleaded. "According to Keith's report, Reiner's comrades trust him with even their own lives, and he's able to deal a fatal blow at any given chance,"

"Isn't Kirstein that one self centered dick wipe that everyone talks about?"

"I think so," Erwin sighed, "but that's not the point right now. Don't you think that I trust Keith? Kirstein wouldn't allow his friends to die in battle, despite being haughty. With Arlert's quick mind, he'll be able to squeeze them out of any tight situation they may be in, and I'm quite sure that Reiner would be able to kill an aberrant once it comes by and threatens the formation,"

"And Ackerman?"

The blonde rested his head on one hand and bit his lip in frustration. "As I said before, Ackerman should be kept near you guys on communication. It helps with the guard,"

"She's already Eren's guard dog," Levi smirked.

"That kind of sounded like you were jealous, Levi,"

He let out an irritated 'tch' and ignored Erwin's comment.

"Well, it's true the little shit has his own guard dog, but she may not be enough if the Titans do manage to fuck with the formation," said the blonde.

"Besides that, is there anything else you need to tell me? I'm hungry," Levi complained quietly.

"Don't be so careless, god damn it, this is important. It'll be different from any other expedition we've had beyond the walls. It may even be more interesting than the time we found that one soldier's journal... Ilse, if I recalled correctly,"

"Who?" Levi absentmindedly piped while cleaning his nails.

Erwin let out a groan of frustration and stood up from his seat. "I'll leave you here to look over the formation plan again. The final results sounded quite well for Arlert and I. You can keep it if you'd like, but we're going to talk about it to the soldiers some time next week. Take care of it, all right?"

"I can't promise that it'll stay one hundred percent by next week," the raven murmured.

"Try to keep it at fifty, at the very least?" Erwin teased as he walked out of the office.

The raven let a soft chuckle escape the back of his throat. After the door was shut closed with a tight snap, he ran a hand through his hair and sighed. So much for a decent sleep. He absentmindedly thumbed the formation plan, looking over it and giving a small sneer of disgust as he noticed a couple of stray ink drops and coffee stains around the paper.

_'Weren't you the one that told me to be careful with it, you god damn hypocrite?'_

As he grabbed the formation plan and rolled it up neatly, he felt a sudden prickle at the nape of his neck. A small shiver was sent down his spine; The feeling of being watched. He straightened his back and glared behind him towards the window. It was a split second, but he saw something move. Or was he just being paranoid?

_'Who the fuck is playing Big Brother with me?'_

Levi stealthily left his seat and clicked the window open. A small breeze brushed his cheek as it flew into his office, a couple of papers falling from his desk and onto the floor. The renewed mess of paperwork on the floor didn't concern Levi now; What concerned him most was who was watching him. A soft afterglow of light gray smoke was barely visible in the distance. So his Big Brother knew how to use 3D Maneuver Gear?

Before he turned back, something caught his eye. Levi noticed that something was caught on the sharp edge of the window, fluttering frantically with the breeze. His eyes widened slightly as he plucked it off the windowsill and brought it up to his face to examine closely.

It was a single strand of blonde hair.


	6. VI: Heartwarming Lips

**Note: **Another short chapter, but trust me on this, it was so worth it. I had to write it down, this was just the perfect time to do it. A little Eremin romance coming your way, and a mysterious two that you'd probably guess right away.

* * *

**_VI: Heartwarming Lips_**

A sharp '_tink' _was heard in the distance as Armin struggled with handling his 3D Maneuver Gear. His hands trembled slightly, denying him the ability to control his every movement with one hundred percent accuracy. He didn't know why he was scared anymore; Was it because they were getting ready to go on the 57th expedition, or was it because he thought of himself as a burden compared to Jean and Reiner?

Most of the soldiers had already stocked up on their supplies, applied the belts to their Gear, and headed out towards the stables to retrieve their horses. Armin simply sat there, rethinking things over; Was he truly willing to sacrifice his life to humanity if he was ordered to? He flinched softly as he felt a hand grip his shoulder gently.

"Why are you taking so long here? Everyone's already waiting outside for Heichou, and if we're not there by the time he arrives, everyone would be waiting on us. You wouldn't want that, would you?"

"Don't make me feel worse, Eren," the blonde growled.

Eren's grip on his shoulder tightened momentarily before letting go. "Here, I'll help you,"

Armin's mouth opened in protest, but closed again once the brunette took the gas tank from his hand. He easily applied them to his Gear, making Armin blush softly in embarrassment; What kind of soldier was he if he couldn't do the same? The blonde readjusted his belts before standing up to meet Eren. His eyes gave a pleading look.

"You better live through the mission, you dumb ass," Armin said, his voice slightly trembling. "You nearly gave me a heart attack last time... if that happens again, I'll kick you,"

A smile tore across the brunette's lips. "I know we'll come back together,"

Armin looked up at Eren through teary eyes. This caused Eren to panic; Why the hell was he tearing up on him now?

"How can I be so sure that you'll come back this time?"

Eren bit his lip as his hand cupped Armin's chin. He forced the blonde's chin even higher, to where their eyes actually met. Turquoise and sky blue orbs danced together in one beautiful melody. He licked his slightly chapped lips, earning a soft blush from Eren. The blonde's hands found their way to the collar of Eren's shirt, gently taking it into his fist and signaling his approval.

"Trust me, Armin," Eren muttered as he leaned down closer to his face, "I promise that I'll come back alive -" both of their eyes were half lidded by the time his lips were only millimeters away from Armin's, "- so I could do this,"

As their lips met, a soft tingling sensation ran through the blonde's spine. He tilted his head further to mildly deepen the kiss, a soft scarlet blush now growing on their cheeks. The atmosphere was all too warm, all too comforting. It was almost infatuating. Eren was just so soft... so gentle. Armin simply adored their reunion; He missed the feeling of Eren's lips on his. It's been all too long, he just couldn't wait anymore. He gingerly pulled on the collar of Eren's shirt, feeling a sudden growth of heat from the brunette's face (his blush intensified, no doubt).

Eren broke away from the heated kiss, his other hand now entangled in the blonde's hair. The tears that had once been building up in the corners of Armin's eyes were now shining beautifully at the roots of his eyelashes. Eren gave a small grin and brushed his hand across Armin's forehead, moving his bangs aside and giving a small peck.

"It's a promise that I can definitely keep," the brunette said as he removed his hand from Armin's hair. "It'd be best if we left already... I highly doubt that Heichou is still in his office,"

The blonde nodded vigorously as they headed off together towards the stables for their mounts.

**o0o0o0o**

"They're actually quite close," A man chuckled as he watched the teens break away from their kiss. "So does this mean that we go after Armin, too?"

"No," A sharp voice snapped, "You're too disastrous; He's not the one that we're looking for,"

A small 'tch' left the man's lips. "You know, if we use Armin to threaten the bastard, we'll be able to get the answers we want,"

The woman shook her head in frustration and turned back, watching both Eren and Armin walk out of the supply house.

"I don't really want to hurt the little guy either, but he's actually really smart. I'd be careful if I were you," He nodded towards her.

"Don't worry about it. As long as he doesn't get in my way, I won't do anything rash,"

"Remember that we're going to be in that shitty formation. If you kill us, you'll never be able to see your daddy again,"

Her eyes narrowed almost dangerously. "Don't you ever mention him again. He already apologized to me, and I already told him that I'd come back home when I was done here. It doesn't matter who I kill, as long as this is carried out, I'll be fine,"

"At least try to keep him alive, all right? As much as I want to use Armin against him, it's best if we just played nice for now," he growled.

"I'll only go after him when the time is right," the woman grinned, "But if he comes after me first, then I'll have no choice but to fight back. Deal?"

A small pause.

"Fine,"


	7. VII: Lost Lover

**Note: **Yes, here comes the feels. This chapter goes on during and after the 57th expedition, and I kind of add Levi's past for a little bit as I dive into the Rivetra pairing. (No, some of the stuff in here isn't 100% accurate to the anime/manga.) I did use the lyrics of an OST or two... it just fit so perfectly with the pairing, especially at this moment. Erwin isn't the cheeky ass that Levi knows and kind-of-loves-but-mostly-hates, either... this is why we can't have nice things, you guys. Don't make promises you can't keep. T_T

* * *

_**VII: Lost Lover**_

Levi soared through the trees in graceful sweeps, a trail of light gray gas from the Gear following behind him. He slightly ground his teeth in frustration as he heard Eren's roars; He shouldn't of used his power, he should of trusted his comrades. As he hooked onto another tree, he noticed something unusual about it. Blood was covering the trunk. His eyes widened; It wasn't possible.

No... it was.

His eyes widened as he saw Gunther hanging upside down from a low tree branch, the blood masking his face now hardened and chipped. Levi bit his lip; Gunther was dead and Eren's a god damn Titan.

_'Don't tell me...'_

He bit his lip harder as he saw what remained of Eld on the ground, surrounded by a pool of blood that tainted the grass around him. His torn body was still (very slowly) leaking warm blood, and, by the look of it, his arm had been drained of its blood a long time ago. A small breeze came by and gingerly brushed his hair and the bloodstained grass. Levi's pupils sunk into pure darkness as he reluctantly turned away from his fallen soldier. However, the attempt was vain; As soon as he turned away from Eld, he saw Auruo sprawled on the grass, his face still frozen on the scared look he gave before death.

_'… that my comrades...'_

Levi hooked onto the furthest tree and tried to escape this madness. He couldn't handle the frightened look Auruo still had on his face. As he whipped around a tree, he stopped dead in his tracks. A body lay limp at the foot of a bloodstained tree. This couldn't be... that girl on the tree... it can't be Petra. His eyes started to dampen in tears as he neared the dead body; Sure enough, it was Petra.

_'… are all dead,'_

With a small sigh of grief, he stared down at Petra's dead body. It reminded him of the past... they looked alike. Petra's eyes were still open, her usually bright hazelnut eyes now clouded and dull. The blood that covered one half of her face was still wet; She died recently. As Levi continued to stare at her expressionless look, more tears began to swell in his eyes and blur his vision.

_'Was it that you were such a reluctant hero?'_

He gave a defeated gasp as a single tear streaked down his cheek. Retrieving his hooks, he fell on his knees at Petra's side. The fall would have been painful, if he wasn't too distracted with what lay before him.

'_No one wants to die too fast,'_

A small gust of wind grazed Petra's hair, her bangs now masking her bloodied face. Levi shuddered softly as another tear escaped his eye; Didn't that same thing happen to his friend long ago?

**.**

**.**

"_- and it'll only return to you if I'm alive. I promise that this will get back to you, no matter what,"_

_Levi's eyes widened._

_"I'll hold you to that, you better remember it," Levi muttered._

_Petra knew that their conversation was done, so she stood up from her seat and proceeded to walk towards the exit. However, she was wrong._

_"Petra," Levi called again._

_"Yes, Heichou?"_

_"Promise me that you'll come back alive," He said with a rather hoarse voice._

_Levi's eyes widened slightly in surprise; She turned around, folded her left arm behind her back and used the other hand to form a fist right above her heart. A soldier's solute, coming from Petra._

_He knew he had that promise._

**.**

**.**

"Petra, what happened to that promise you made me? Didn't I tell you to stay alive?" Levi whispered hoarsely, "You promised you'd come back to me, safe and sound -" He started to break down into tears, "- and what the hell did you do now?!"

Despite the blood that was still fresh on her uniform, he grabbed Petra and hugged her tightly. It was inhumane to even touch a corpse, but he couldn't help it. The tears that were steaming down his face were the only things that comforted him. It's been too long since he cried, and no one can see him cry but her. They were the same person; They were one.

_'Life, what kind of sick game are you playing? Why did you send her back to me, so I can relive that nightmare all over again?'_

A strangled sigh left him as he shuddered once more. It's been too long since he's broken down like this. Here sits humanity's strongest soldier, whimpering like a small child and clutching a dead body. He sniffled and let go of her, watching as she idly hit the floor with a dull thud. This was the first time in years that he faced defeat... to the Titans. Levi's vision was completely lost to the tears that flooded him; The tears that laid forgotten within him for years. Out of all the deaths he has experienced, he had to cry for this one soldier.

_'No, she wasn't just a soldier,'_

He cursed himself for even crying for her. Why, Petra? What made her so special to Levi that he had to face defeat like this? More importantly... why was she so foolish to go after the Female Titan like that? Did he not tell her that she can back out at any moment she wanted to?

**.**

**.**

_"I did say that I wanted to talk to you earlier," Levi continued, "and I'm only going to ask you this: Are you sure you're willing to put your life on the line for that shitty brat?"_

_Petra hesitated for a moment; She had to pick her words carefully. "Heichou, if I wasn't willing to risk my life for the sake of humanity, then why would I be here now, talking to you?"_

_The raven let out a soft groan that signaled his fatigue. "You know you don't have to die young for him. You're a very skilled soldier that has much to look forward to in your life. Are you even wary of a bloody death?"_

_"If it's for you, then no,"_

_**...**_

_"You can back out at any time you want. I won't say no and I won't stop you. For all we know, you could die on this mission," Levi pressed on._

_"Heichou, why are you only giving me this option and no one else?" Petra asked with a small, innocent tone in her voice._

_**...**_

_"It's... It's because I... care," the raven reluctantly spat out the last word in his sentence._

_"I'll never back out from something like this, trust me," she smiled again._

**.**

**.**

"Your death wasn't for me, it was humanity!" Levi said between small gasps and sighs. "You stupid bitch... Why didn't you listen to me and leave when you had the chance?!"

His thick tears glistened as they splashed on the blades of grass. With another sigh, he looked up through the thick leaves and branches of trees. The dim sunlight brightened his cold eyes.

_'But in reality... no one has the chance to leave, huh? So that means I'm crying... for my... lover?' _He closed his eyes at the word 'lover.' _'So what I want back... is my... lover? Does this mean I have no power, now that I'm standing alone? Fruitlessly calling your name?'_

Levi opened his eyes once more and looked back at Petra. He allowed his hand to brush his tears away instead of using his handkerchief. It was quite foreign, but now wasn't the time to be the clean freak that he was.

_'This whole time, was I looking for my love to you? Looking for a place for us to sit peacefully? This means that I lost my dreams... I lost you. No, both of you, because of this disaster that we call 'life,''_

He shakily stood up and patted the dirt off his pants. That same breeze that touched them before came by again, this time stronger, brushing the hair out of Petra's face. It was for a split second, but Levi saw it; A small spark glinted within her clouded eyes. He bit his lip as his eyes widened at that moment. He came to a realization.

_'I promise you, Petra, that I'll live on for you. It doesn't matter if you're not here with me anymore. I know you're watching me from above... both of you are. Give Petunia my greetings if you can remember me... because I know that where I'm going, it's too far away from you two,'_

His face was now dry, his eyes now in the normal 'concerned' look that he wore on a daily basis. He didn't know what would happen, nor did he believe in his own ability, but he knew that no one had a place to hide. All he knew was that his life was still going on, and he had to live it. He had to serve humanity the best way he could, so no one else can go through this nightmare. A gentle smile spread across his lips as he straightened his back and formed a soldier's solute to Petra's dead body.

_'I'll always remember you, and until death, I'll live my life effectively. I'm not sure if you'll still remember me, but in the next life, don't make promises you can't keep,'_

He hooked onto a branch and whipped through the trees, leaving Petra to finally rest in peace.

**o0o0o0o**

A light knock was heard on Levi's office door. Levi muttered his approval to come in, his eyes still stuck to the paperwork he was writing to the jury. It was said that the results of the mission was to be recorded on paper and sent to the jury in order to seal Eren's fate in whether he was going to live on or not. Footsteps were getting closer to him, yet the still ignored it and continued to scribble down sentence after sentence on the parchment in front of him.

"Levi," the usual deep voice nudged him.

Levi finally looked up and saw Erwin, his usual slick blonde hair now somewhat ruffled. He knew it was from the stress and partially because of the lament outcome of the expedition. Besides that, he looked normal. The raven sat up in his chair and started to stretch as Erwin reached into his breast pocket.

"When we collected the bodies, we found this in the pocket of Petra's jacket-" Levi immediately stopped in the middle of his stretch, "- and after reading its contents, it was meant to be given to you,"

"You're telling me that everyone read what was inside the locket?" Levi groaned. "God knows what she put in that thing, it must have been embarrassing,"

"No, not everyone, just me," Erwin shuffled his feet, "I'll give it to you, but there's one thing I want you to know. You told me that she promised she'd bring this back to you -" He took out the locket and dropped it onto the desk, "- and she technically did keep that promise, even if she did die. Petra promised that the locket would come back to you, and it did. She'll never fall as long as you keep it with you,"

Levi felt his eyes start to water. He immediately blinked the tears away while asking, "Who told you to say that? The Erwin I know would never say this to me,"

The blonde turned his back on Levi to hide the smile on his face. "The Erwin you know is afraid to say this bullshit to you because he doesn't think that you'd need the comfort. I've never seen you cry, and I don't plan on seeing it for as long as I live. Good night, Levi,"

As Erwin left him alone in his office, the raven's eyes narrowed; What the hell did this locket contain that he'd possibly cry about? He picked it up in his hands, clicking it open and expecting it to be a picture of some sort. However, he was wrong. It was a neatly folded note. He took out the note and hesitantly unfolded it, leaving the locket to lay open on his desk. His eyes widened at he read its contents.

_'You were always special to me, Corporal. They keep telling me that I'm too young to marry, but I don't care. How do I say this? I love you, Levi,'_

Tears immediately found their way to the corners of Levi's eyes. This was nearly the same thing that the last locket contained... a locket that he kept hidden in the depths of his drawer. He sniffled and furiously rubbed the tears away from his eyes; Now was not the time to cry. Heartbreak will never be the reason why he dies in battle. However, no matter how hard he tried, he couldn't even look at the note without feeling himself inch closer to crying.

The raven sighed and stood up from his chair. He absentmindedly walked to the window behind him and opened it, leaning on the windowsill and peering out into the cloudy night sky. Clenching he note to his heart, he allowed a single tear to fall from his eye. It ran down his cheek and splashed onto the windowsill. This was the only time he'll cry... or at least he told himself that. Before he left the windowsill, he felt something splash onto his cheek.

No, it couldn't be another tear. He looked up and saw that the puffy clouds were tainted black. It was only mere seconds, but another drop of rain splashed onto his cheek. After two or three more drops, it finally began to rain freely. It wasn't a very heavy rain, not was it too thin. The rain was gentle, falling down on him and sinking into the collar of his uniform or into his hair. His eyes widened.

_'Petra... are you weeping?'_


	8. VIII: Dominance

**_Note:_**RIVETRA IS DEAD now i'm crying into my pillow oh god what did I do Q_Q it was just so perfect though. It's hard to say that o.o but yeah... perfect time to add that chapter in. Just had to get that out of my head, okay? Stahp :c I actually cried while writing that. This is why you don't write about a Rivetra pairing while listening to "Call Your Name." LIFE. I also continued off of those two 'mysterious' people who were talking in the chapter before the last one, and if you read the manga, you'd know who 'the man' is (but I'm pretty sure I made it obvious here anyways, so). No, I won't spoil his identity until later. I already gave you an early warning, so... yeah. I hope you don't mind ;-;

Okay, okay, I'm fine, I'm cool. The only chapter warning I have here is that it contains language. Besides that, there is some romance between Armin and Eren in this chapter, but it's put in a PG 13 - 15 scene. It's not too much to worry about. Either way, I had to put this in sooner or later, since it effects some stuff down the road. Don't worry, though, there _is _smut later on in the way of life, I promise. c:

And at the end of the day, behind all that poofy, dorky tissue is a somewhat dominant person *ahem* ARMIN *ahem* hence the chapter name.

* * *

_**VII: Dominance**_

"You nearly killed me, asshole,"

"I'm sorry, but you went after me," a stern voice sighed.

"If I didn't do anything that looked like I was trying to stop you, it would of looked suspicious. I told you not to do anything rash, and what do you do?" the man growled.

"A couple of deaths isn't so much,"

"You killed off most of the formation and Heichou's entire Special Operations Squad, and now he's hurting like a little bitch," He sighed. "You were supposed to ignore the other soldiers, not brutally kill them. Eren was our target, and Armin's getting suspicious because the Female Titan just happened to know who he was. You really need to calm down, okay? 'A couple of deaths isn't so much' my fucking ass! I swear to god I'll kick you,"

The blonde laid back in her seat and gave a devilish smirk. "Pardon me, but I need to calm down? Aren't you the one threatening to kick me?"

He let out a small 'tch' and blushed in embarrassment. "You smart ass... it's hard to work with you,"

"Why, thank you, good sir," she smiled cheekily.

"Shut the fuck up,"

**o0o0o0o**

Armin was sat hunched over his desk once more, this time agitated by both stress and worry. It's already been a couple of hours since they got back from the expedition and Eren was still unconscious. He stretched his back with a small grunt of discomfort and stared at the clock. His eyes widened as he read half past seven o'clock; He missed supper and he didn't even notice it. This whole time he's been at his desk, staring at the same page of his book while lost in his thoughts.

As he slammed the book shut and dropped it onto the face of his desk, he heard footsteps outside in the hallway. He passed it over as someone walking back to their dorm after they finished guard duty. Before he had the chance to stretch his back out once more, the door handle shook and the wooden door creaked open. Armin hesitated before looking back; Sure enough, it was Eren standing at the doorway.

He immediately stood up from his seat and stared at the brunette. They stood motionless for a second in an awkward silence that simply insisted on dragging on. After what felt like years of being paralyzed on the spot, Armin absentmindedly pushed his seat away from him and ran to Eren. He wrapped his arms around Eren's neck and allowed himself to sob into the brunette's shoulder.

"Y- You god damn idiot – piece of sh- shit - you went and nearly... n- nearly... got yourself killed – I would of – where the fuck – why did you even – _E- Eren_," Armin spluttered as he felt Eren's warm hands find their way around him.

Armin's thick tears were already sinking into Eren's shirt. The brunette hugged Armin tightly while nuzzling the top of his head.

"I made you a promise that I could keep. I told you I'd come back alive, and here I am," He muttered.

"... didn't have to give me a mother fucking h- heart attack..." the blonde sniffled softly as he released Eren from the hold around his neck. "I- I'm fine – don't – just – get some god damn rest,"

Eren removed his arms from around the blonde and gripped his hands instead. He gave them a soft squeeze before letting go. He brought his hands up to Armin's face and wiped the tears away, earning a small shudder. The brunette closed the door behind him and gave Armin a warm smile before walking to his bed and collapsing upon it.

"I think this is the only time where I've experienced you having troubles finishing your own sentence," Eren muttered as the blonde blushed in embarrassment, "It took Levi hours to convince the government that I don't need to stay in a cell for now on, and thank god too; This is much more comfortable than being handcuffed in a prison cell,"

Armin wiped away the remaining tears that were left on his face as he sat back down at his desk. "I would of smacked a bitch if they put you back in a cage..."

The brunette couldn't stop himself from laughing aloud. "So what have you been doing all this time? I started to worry when I didn't find you during dinner,"

With a small sigh, he replied, "You shouldn't worry so much about me,"

"It's because I care,"

"Prove that it's care and not worry," Armin snapped.

A small pause.

"Armin, get over here, I need to tell you something,"

With a small blush, he hesitantly left his desk and made his way to the side of Eren's bed. He leaned over Eren and gave a small nod, signaling him to go on. Instead of saying something, he grabbed the blonde's wrist.

"It's a secret though, you'll have to get closer,"

His eyes narrowed in suspicion. As Armin put his left knee on the bed and leaned closer to him, the brunette tugged on his wrist, causing him to collapse onto the bed with a terrified squeak. He tried to get up, but he ended up accidentally nudging his hand between Eren's legs instead. The blonde stopped dead on the spot as he felt the warmth engulf his hand; This was a very awkward position indeed.

Eren gave a devilish smirk as he gently gripped Armin's shoulders and pulled him further onto the bed. He positioned the blonde directly on top of him, allowing Armin to straddle him. Armin's blush intensified harshly as he straddled Eren's lap. Eren let go of his shoulders and found the collar of his dress shirt instead. He harshly pulled on Armin's collar, taking the blonde by full surprise.

As Armin struggled to keep his balance, he heard Eren whisper in his ear, "You're actually really cute when you're frustrated, you know that?"

"Eren, stop it, my face is on fire," Armin whined softly as Eren granted him freedom.

He allowed Armin to regain his balance, only to pull on his collar again. However, this time, it was into another kiss. His eyes fluttered shut as Eren captured his lips with his own. The blush on Armin's face was nearly maddening. The blonde readjusted himself on Eren's lap while his forearms rest themselves on either side of Eren's head, basically trapping him on the spot. As his fingers weaved through Eren's chocolate locks, he felt the brunette release the collar of his shirt.

They broke away from the kiss, their eyes only opening halfway. Eren let a small grin rip across his lips.

"I did promise you that too, didn't I?"

Armin refused to untangle his fingers from the brunette's soft hair. "I'm glad that you're one to keep your promises,"

"Hey... I was thinking..."

The blonde gave a small nod to signal him to go on.

"What would you say to a relationship...?"

He could of sworn that his heart skipped a beat at that moment. "A relationship with who exactly?"

"You know perfectly well," Eren snapped, earning a soft giggle.

"You already know that I would say yes," the blonde continued, "but don't you have other things in mind? I'm sure someone like you has tons to do already... I'd only waste your time,"

Eren shook his head in disappointment. "Do you really think that you're a waste of time? You've known me for how many years now, and you're still thinking that I don't enjoy your company?"

A small pause.

"I only think so lowly of myself because it's true..."

"It's not true," Eren smiled.

"It is," the blonde muttered.

"Not,"

"Is,"

"Not,"

As Armin opened his mouth again to continue the restless argument, Eren nipped at his lower lip aggressively, earning a surprised yelp.

"So I take that as a 'yes' for what I asked you before?" The brunette chuckled.

Armin blushed gingerly in embarrassment as he nodded. Eren planted a soft peck on his lips as he patted the blonde's hips to signal his removal.

"If you want, you can g-"

Armin had other things in mind, and before Eren finished his sentence, he was interrupted by a moist kiss. It took him by full surprise, but he accepted it anyways. His hands gripped Armin's hips (They were already there anyways), earning a small flinch of surprise from the the blonde. It took strength to hold in a laugh; He didn't think Armin would have flinched at that. Armin hesitated for a moment before slowly dragging his tongue across Eren's bottom lip.

Eren broke away from the kiss and said, "Armin, don't do anything you're not comfortable with,"

Armin gave a devious smirk. "If I was uncomfortable right now, why would I be in this position?"

"You were always swift with your tongue, you know that?" Eren pouted as he gripped Armin's hips tighter. "... smart ass..."

"Is that so?" the blonde muttered. "I'm not too sure if you know exactly how swift it could be,"

Eren's eyes narrowed. "What do you mean?"

Armin leaned in and licked Eren's lips, softly sucking on his bottom lip afterward. The brunette captured Armin's lips and slipped his tongue into the others mouth. Their eyes were still half lidded as their tongues fought for dominance, their lips parting every now and then with a small sucking noise. Each parting revealed their tongues as they circled each other. Armin still couldn't believe himself for being in such a tangled position in the first place, but more importantly, why was he enjoying the sweet taste of Eren that tingled on his lips and tongue?

The blonde broke from the kiss momentarily, panting somewhat heavily to catch his breath. Eren did the same, his hands now absentmindedly caressing the blonde's hips in circular motions. Armin leaned down and licked the length of Eren's neck, moving back down to the pulse point to nibble softly. The brunette's hips betrayed him with an involuntary buck as teeth bit into his neck. The bite itself was not hard enough to draw blood, but it certainly left a bruise.

"Fucking Armin," Eren said as his breathing hitched.

"I'm sorry, did I hurt you?" Armin teased.

"If Mikasa sees that bruise on my neck, she'll make sure I never see daylight again,"

"I don't really think that matters now," Armin grinned as he nibbled up the brunette's jaw and onto his chin.

He gave Eren a quick peck to the lips before untangling his hands from the chocolate locks and sitting up correctly. Eren gave a small smirk; The blonde was actually dominant in one way or another. Armin unbuttoned the first three buttons to his dress shirt as he noticed the air around them was thick. The brunette bit his lip as he grabbed Armin's shoulders and pushed him off his lap. They switched positions; Armin was now on bottom, with Eren seated comfortably between his legs.

The blonde's breathing hitched as Eren leaned down and latched onto his ear lobe, sucking aggressively.

"Do you still think so lowly of yourself, considering how dominant you happen to be?" He purred into the blonde's ear.

"You're not too bad, either," Armin grinned as Eren bit softly into his ear lobe before pulling away.

Eren's hand brushed across the blonde's bangs, moving them out of his eyes. He admired Armin's eyes; They were protuberant and glistened as the light basically bounced off of them. Eren planted a soft kiss on the blonde's forehead, the blush on Armin's face intensifying greatly as he did this.

"I wouldn't of thought that we'd be here," the brunette smiled, "but I really don't want this to ruin our friendship, either. If we do break up... we'll still be friends, right?"

Armin hesitantly bit his lip. "I didn't think you'd be worried about such a thing this early on. Of course we'd stay together, whether it'd be in a relationship or as best friends. But frankly, I'd rather worry about what's happening right now rather than what will happen in the future,"

The brunette let out a small chuckle as he leaned down and kissed Armin softly on the lips. Armin's hands slithered up to the brunette's neck and wrapped around it, pulling them closer together. He opened his mouth to deepen the kiss further, a small blush growing on the brunette's cheeks as he sensed Armin's willingness. Their tongues met between their lips, a small tingle running down Armin's spine at the contact.

However, despite the warm, stuffy atmosphere and being wrapped so closely to Eren, he felt another chill run down his spine. He broke away from the kiss, their eyes opening only halfway. Eren slightly raised his eyebrow to question the blonde's reason.

"Eren, did you lock the door?" The blonde muttered, trying not to be heard.

"Oh shit,"

Armin looked over the brunette's shoulder and saw that the door was open. It was merely a centimeter or two, but it was still _open, _and someone was _watching them_, regardless the limited amount of space.

It was faint, but he still heard it; His heart nearly stopped as he heard the frantic shuffling of feet from the person as he or she escaped into the dark castle.


	9. IX: Foreign Trust

**Note: **This chapter contains a bit of Annie and Big Sister Mikasa. It goes into a tiny bit of detail of Annie's relationship (but it'd be better if I say friendship instead) with a fellow comrade in the Military Police, Marlowe. Yes, they are OOC, but it's only because with the power of Fanfiction, I can change a lot of things that happen within the Anime/Manga. No, they had no relations whatsoever within the anime/manga, but Marlowe will take his part in the fanfiction, so I'm going to add him in here. I hope I have your guys' approval on that. It'll lead to some things later on in the way of life, but it won't look so good for Annie. I'm just letting you know right know. Yes, I'm fully aware that she's not that much of a bad guy, but this fanfiction says otherwise. (Deal with me c:)

Some mentions of Eremin and hints of Jearmin with Big Sister Mikasa coming to save the day. Minor language coming your way, too, but I highly doubt that it bothers any of you. There's also a tad bit of romance, which I kind of struggled to write Q_Q I'm terrible at writing romance scenes tbh.

* * *

**_IX: Foreign Trust_**

_(Two weeks after the 57th expedition)_

_(Stohess District, Evening)_

"So you're stupid enough to actually go and try to fight those assholes?" Annie shook her head in disappointment. "Just look at you now, you're bruised,"

She took a seat next to Marlowe's bed and took out a small bottle, earning a reproachful look.

"Shut up, Annie," Marlowe sighed as he swatted Annie's hand away from the bruise on his face. "They were selling our Gear to the black market, what else can I do?"

"You could have been a good little boy and ignored them," Annie snapped as she opened the bottle and squeezed some of its contents on her hand. She forcibly rubbed some of the ointment on the blackened skin just below his eye, ignoring the hand that clawed at her wrist.

"Ow!" the man hissed in protest.

Annie giggled softly in response to his cry and closed the bottle of healing ointment. She carelessly threw it onto the dresser next to her, ignoring the glare that she received from her friend. Marlowe laid back on his bed, slightly wincing in pain as he accidentally put pressure on his bandaged arm.

"They crippled you for a useful amount of time, idiot. That's one less soldier for this shitty government, and one less person that I can talk to without losing a couple of brain cells. Why didn't you come to me? I could of drop kicked them for you,"

"I don't need help from _you,_" Marlowe rolled his eyes. "If anything, I wouldn't want to be a waste of time. It's a miracle I even met you,"

"You mean us meeting was a miracle because I just happen to squeeze your sorry ass out of tight spots often?" the blonde replied.

"Has anyone ever told you that you're one smart bitch?" He grinned.

"I've been told," Annie said as she smacked the man upside the head. "Has anyone told you that you're an idiot? But you're a likable one, for some reason,"

Marlowe flinched at the sudden contact. "The hell did you do that for, asshole?! I'll get you back, just you wait!"

"In the condition you're in?"

He muttered something under his breath as he blushed in embarrassment. This earned him a breathy laugh from Annie.

"Annie, shut up. Where were you the other day, anyways?" He asked. "I was looking for you everywhere, but no one saw you around. You were still in this district, right?"

"I was on duty in the outer district," the blonde said, ignoring the doubtful look that she received from the man. "I was told that there was some trouble down in Karanese, so I went to check it out,"

"You should of taken me with you," Marlowe pouted.

"If I took you with me, you would of gotten yourself whooped by another soldier," Annie scoffed, "You act like a complete dumb ass,"

"Hey, don't treat me like a little kid! I'm a soldier, just like you, and you're still a rookie!"

"A rookie that's way more stronger than you," She laughed.

Marlowe sat up in his bed and flared, "Prove it, I dare you!"

He wore a serious look on his face, only making Annie's smile widen. It was actually quite funny, such a dare coming from someone weaker than you. She got up from her seat and decided to prove herself to Marlowe. With a grin, she pounced on him, earning a strangled yell of both pain and surprise.

"Hey, I have a broken arm here, be careful!" Marlowe growled as she pinned his good arm down to the bed.

"Tell me I proved you wrong," She teased.

"... Fine..." the man sighed, turning his head away in embarrassment.

Annie smiled softly. This was the only man that could actually make her mess around like this... the only man that could actually piss her off, make her laugh, make her smile... and most importantly, poke and prod at her heart.

"I'll give you a get well present," the blonde said with a rather soothing voice.

"It better be something good, then," Marlowe said playfully.

There was a small pause. He turned his head back to Annie in confusion; Was she getting to get off or not? As soon as he faced her once more, he felt something both soft and warm on his forehead. His eyes widened at the contact; A blush was just threatening to coat his cheeks. Her slightly puckered lips were still on his forehead for what felt like days, her eyes half lidded while his were wide with shock.

Annie pulled away from his forehead and said, "You better get well soon, or I'll make those injuries worse,"

The man opened his mouth for a moment to speak, but closed it again. After a couple of hesitant seconds, a warm smile ripped across his lips.

"I'll be able to use this arm to smack you in no time," He said, gesturing to his bandaged arm with a small nod. "It's what you deserve,"

Annie allowed a laugh to escape the back of her throat as she unpinned him from the bed. She turned her back on him and made her way to the exit, knowing that their conversation was done. Before she left the room, she grabbed the side of the door frame with one hand, looking back over her shoulder. She noticed a defeated blush on Marlowe's face, which he was trying to hide now by pretending to rest his head between one folded hand. It made her bite her lip in hesitation.

"Hey... I'll be back tomorrow, okay? There's something we need to talk about, something that I've been brewing on the past couple of months... years, even. You have to promise me that you won't tell anyone, though, and you better keep it. I've known you for a long time now, and... I trust you,"

Marlowe's eyes widened; Annie actually trusted him like that? The thing Annie had to tell him sounded small, yet it still managed to spark his interest. He nodded in approval and watched as she walked away, finally leaving him to sit alone in his room once more.

**o0o0o0o**

Marlowe laid only half awake on his bed, weary from both boredom and the medication he was taking for his pain. He certainly regret going after those two soldiers, considering the fact that he was out of their league. The man barely made it onto the top ten trainees to graduate, and through these years, he wondered why he even got the tenth spot in the first place. The true meaning behind him attacking those two soldiers wasn't because they were selling their equipment to the black market, but because he wanted to be great for at least one thing.

Truth says he wanted to impress Annie, which he hasn't done at all for the past two or three months that they've known each other. It seems stupid for them to have such a close relationship in such a small time period, but Annie trusted him, and that's all that concerned him now. Maybe they did argue and fight often, but that didn't matter. Marlowe let out a soft sigh as he looked out the window and saw that the sun was just begging to dip below the horizon.

As he was on the verge of retiring to the desire to sleep, he heard a knock on the door. The knock itself pulled him out of his infatuation from the drug, and now he was fully aware of what he was doing. He could of sworn that his heart skipped a beat or two at that exact moment; Annie was probably knocking on his door. Sure enough, it was Annie, with the usual messily tied up hair and straightened uniform. Marlowe greeted her with a soft nod as she stepped into the room.

"Did you take your medicine?" Annie asked plainly as she sat down at the foot of his bed.

"I already took it, don't worry. It feels like I ran a god damn mile," the man replied with a small laugh. "Where have you been, anyways? I was actually starting to debate whether to pick up a book or not,"

"No wonder you're such an idiot," Annie sneered playfully.

"Hey, I swear I was going to die of boredom while I was waiting for your ass to get over here. What took so long?" Marlowe snapped in his defense.

The blonde absentmindedly tucked her bangs behind her ear while saying, "I was on duty like any other soldier. It's nothing to be worried about,"

"Who said I was worried? I was just complaining because you left me here to rot," Marlowe pouted. "Anyways... wasn't there something you needed to tell me?"

Annie bit her lip as she hesitantly replied, "Well... I'm just letting you know now... I trust you, and... it has to do with the 57th expedition,"

Marlowe's eyes narrowed dangerously. He heard of the 57th expedition and how badly it turned out, but how does Annie have anything to do with it?

**o0o0o0o**

"... and he told me to come back, but I'm actually scared... I don't want to be the victim," Annie muttered.

They were now under the same sheet, laying next to each other, with Annie telling the man about her past. She feared that he would see her differently, but Marlowe didn't care. Annie was the one that he trusted and..._ liked _(he was having trouble with his L's). It didn't take long for the blonde to explain herself, but she decided to rush the conversation in fear that he'd call her a monster. Annie sighed softly; She already regret what she had done.

Annie looked over to Marlowe with a pleading look. "Well, what are you waiting for? Aren't you going to call me a monster like everyone else?"

"It's not what you are that makes you a monster," Marlowe gave a warm smile, "It's what you do that makes you the monster. I understand that you had no choice, and your father would have been so proud of you,"

"You... you don't care...?" Annie breathed.

"Why would I? You're still the same girl I met during duty, and you're still the same girl that I like to talk to every day... without, ah, 'losing a couple of brain cells' in the process,"

The blonde covered her face with the thin sheet as a scarlet blush immediately coated her cheeks. It was faint, but she still didn't want Marlowe to see it. He couldn't see her in such a weakened state like that. Marlowe already sensed her uneasiness and allowed his good arm to creep up to her and pull the sheet away. She growled in protest and turned away.

"Back in my old village, they called me a monster. They'd kick me, throw stones at me, anything that would get me to try to run away and escape that madness. It was always in vain, though... my father always came for me. He was the one who taught me how to fight, so I can protect myself, but I never used what he taught me... I didn't want them to be scared of me. Sure they hated me, but they weren't scared,"

"Look at me, Annie," Marlowe said as he gently turned the blonde's head towards him. "Does it look like I'm trying to throw stones at you or drive you out of the district? It doesn't matter what you are, whether you're a Titan or a human, you're still no different from anyone else. Everyone is created equal within these walls, and nothing can change that,"

Annie's eyes widened as she listened to the man's words. It was impossible to think that an idiot like him could possibly say something like that... but what was more surprising was how well he took the truth. However, he did seem hesitant at first, but he grew accustomed to it almost too easily. She jerked his hand away and turned to the window so she wouldn't have to face him.

"I'm actually kind of scared... you took that really well,"

"It's because I-" Marlowe hesitated for a moment. " - like you,"

Annie forced a laugh. "Having troubles with your L's?"

"No, it's just... I've never said 'I love you' to anyone else before. I guess you could say that I... love you...?"

Annie's heart skipped a beat or two. Marlowe... loved her? More importantly, she was the first one to hear him say 'I love you'? A strangled silence passed by. It was broken by a sudden rustling of sheets; Annie felt one of Marlowe's arms snake around her and pull her closer to him. She thrashed around in protest, but it was only momentarily. The blonde grew accustomed to this new warmth as he nuzzled the top of her head, being careful not to hurt his bandaged arm in the process.

"Then should I say 'I love you'? Or should I show you?" Marlowe growled in a husky voice.

"Aren't you already showing me now?"

She felt Marlowe kiss the top of her head. "Look out the window, Annie... don't worry about it anymore. I understand you completely... I understand the true meaning of solitude,"

Annie bit her lip as she looked out the window; She saw that the sun was already setting over the horizon, glistening rays of gold, orange, and scarlet streaking through the clear sky in the process. It made her heart feel as if it was going to melt... or was that just Marlowe taking his own effect? They were soon in a comfortable spooning position, with Marlowe nuzzling against the top of her hair. After some time, she felt something pull on her hair, undoing the bun that she had made earlier. Annie let out a strangled cry in protest but was immediately hushed.

"I don't think you'll need this, your hair is short enough as it is,"

Her hair was very messy and somewhat tangled, but he didn't care; He only snuggled closer to her, enjoying the way her hair tickled his skin. Annie felt like crying, she felt like laughing... she didn't know what to do. This never happened to her before. She brushed it off her shoulder and smiled, allowing sleep to overcome her.

_'This better be the best experience in my life, then'_

**o0o0o0o**

_(Two weeks after the 57th expedition)_

_(Karanese District, Evening)_

Jean sat down in an empty table with his food, glaring at both Eren and Armin in envy as they passed by him. He envied their relationship down to the bitter core, but one thing that he couldn't hate was Armin. Sure the little shit was with Eren, but that didn't change who he was. While they sat down at their own table with Reiner, Sasha, and Connie, he noticed something a bit off. Something was missing.

"Jean, are you not going to eat your dinner?"

He nearly jumped out of his seat as he heard a slightly monotonous voice behind him. With a small sigh, he turned around and saw Mikasa. Jean immediately regretted letting out such a sigh; It probably signaled that he didn't want to talk to anyone at that moment. Mikasa ignored it and sat down next to him, her own tray of food missing.

"You can have my food if you want, I'm not that hungry anyways," Jean laughed awkwardly.

"I didn't come here for your food. Go to Sasha if you don't want it," Mikasa said as she sat down next to him. "I wanted to talk to you about something that happened before, and don't act like you don't know anything. I know you're not all that innocent,"

Jean reluctantly nodded as he took a sip from his cup, signaling that she can go on.

"Why the hell were you peeking in Eren and Armin's dorm at night?"

He nearly choked on his drink as he set it down and wiped his mouth with his sleeve. How did Mikasa know this? It's not like she was watching him... was she? He didn't want to tell her why; It would make him look like a creeper, and he didn't want his crush to think that. But... what was he going to tell her?

"You mean you're not fully aware of their relationship?" Jean replied with a slight grin on his lips.

Mikasa's eyes slightly widened with minor surprise. "Even if they were in a relationship, it gives you no right to sneak through the halls and watch them in their sleep,"

"Did I say that they were sleeping?" He laughed. "If anything, you should pay more attention to them. I don't have to babysit them for you,"

Mikasa's hand slithered onto his shoulder and gripped firmly. Jean looked over to her and saw the dangerous glare she wore on her face. Her eyes were narrowed, her pupils oddly darkened with hatred. It made him uneasy; He's never seen Mikasa like this before.

"I do pay attention to them. I know much more about them than you'd ever imagine," She rasped coldly, "But if you ever decide to hurt either one of them, or even think of eavesdropping on them again, I'll see to your funeral personally. Marco wouldn't of wanted that, would he? He would of wanted you to be the great little mutt you are,"

Jean shuffled his feet in embarrassment. "Mikasa... I didn't think you'd ever say this to me,"

"It's something I do out of both worry and care -" She let go of the bruising hold she had on Jean's shoulder and sat up from her seat. "- but you wouldn't understand what care or worry towards other people feels like, would you?"

Mikasa walked away from Jean, joining Eren and Armin at the table across from him. He let out a hoarse sigh and left his seat, his food laying untouched in its tray.


	10. X: Influence

**Note: **I'm not going to continue the Annie and Marlowe relationship for this chapter, but there'll be more of it, so don't worry too much. I'm sorry for the lack of smut that was promised in the very beginning, but it'll be here in the near future. Basically, Armin starts to take the thug life more seriously and finds out how screwed the government really is. They're starting to point fingers towards Erwin for leading the formation into the Forest and they're still wondering what to do with Eren. Life sucks, doesn't it? A rather hot Eremin scene coming your way, by the way. Yes, I know this is an everybody-hates-Jean fanfiction so far, but things will get better for him, I promise! :)

Chapter warnings: There will be some minor language, a spoiler (Female Titan's identity), and a small portion of smut (I decided to give you guys a little treat) c; Poor Armin... his eyes won't be virgins anymore. (And yes, I'll be switching from third person limited to third person omniscient because I'm a thug like that. Just try to keep up with me.) A little bit of Big Sister Mikasa coming your way, too.

I know the chapter has (kind of) 'long' paragraphs, but come on, now... it's worth the read. Trust me. *ahem* This is what happens when I listen to certain songs *ahem*

* * *

_**X: Influence**_

Armin sat in a rather comfy office chair, organizing various documents and signing some paperwork of his own. The office itself wasn't exactly his; It was Commander Erwin's office, which was quite comfortable despite it's cold look. Erwin had invited Armin into his office earlier that day to help him get some work done while he attended some meetings, and the blonde took the offer with no hesitation. He still wasn't quite comfortable in another person's office, but he would only be there momentarily.

Erwin needed the younger blonde to look over different formation plans and organize documents sent from the government. He knew that Armin wouldn't dare peek at those papers, no matter the cause. In other words, he trusted Armin; There were many strategists besides Armin there, but what made him so unique was his age. It was quite rare, finding a sixteen year old with such a high IQ. As Armin signed his name on a formation plan (he made minor changes to it), he made to file it away in the desk, but knocked over a small pile of documents in the process.

He immediately took a sharp intake of breath as if he burned himself on something. As the papers scattered over the floor, he pushed back on his chair and got to his knees. The blonde's hands skillfully retrieved each paper, leaving only one paper left. Before he picked it up, something caught his eye; The document was probably from the government, no doubt, having a picture of Eren on the front. It didn't fail to spark his curiosity; He decided to disobey his orders and read its contents.

A small gasp left his lips as he read its contents:

_'Reports have told us that you, Erwin Smith, committed treason to mankind. Suspects have given us information that you may know the whereabouts of the Female Titan. Leading your formation into the Forest of Giant Trees was not part of your plan, giving us every right to suspect you. It was told that you refused to return back to Karanese when the right flank was demolished, causing much more heavy casualties along the way. You are to attend a meeting with Eren Jaeger, further discussing your punishment and his fate._

_Eren Jaeger, 16, is known as the 'rogue titan' for his abilities to transform into a Titan. It is unheard of to many, and the fact that there is another Titan Shifter amongst humanity is almost brutal. He was part of the top 10 trainees to graduate in the 104th Trainee Squad, leading 5th place with Annie Leonhart at 4th and Jean Kirstein at 6th. Reports have told us that the Female Titan had shoulder length blonde hair, which fits very few categories of our soldiers._

_Although we do suspect that you have relations with the Female and Rogue Titan -' _Armin hissed in disapproval ("Eren is not our enemy, god damn it!) _'- it is close to impossible for someone amongst the Survey Corps to have known about the formation plan itself. Unless you or any of your soldiers spread the information of the expedition itself, lesser casualties would have occurred and you would have returned with over twenty soldiers. It is expected that you contact the government officials for further discussion of this topic. However, it is highly recommended that you look into the profile of blonde, shoulder length hair (preferably a female). There is only one last thought to put to use; The unknown Titan Shifter most likely came from the 104th Trainee Squad.'_

Armin growled in frustration and stuffed the paper into his arm with the rest of the documents he held. So the government is still wary of Eren, are they? More importantly, why are they blaming Erwin for betraying humanity? If he did know something that they didn't, he'd mention it in their meetings. As he filed the papers away, he chuckled softly to himself.

_'One hell of a government, huh?'_

Just as he finished filing the last paper, the door snapped open. It took him by minor surprise, but he couldn't stop himself from letting out a strangled squeak. Erwin walked into the office, and apparently he didn't hear the squeak at all. Armin stood up from his seat to greet the older blonde.

"Did you enjoy the meeting, sir?"

"Besides having to listen to pointless information and ignoring accusations, yes," Erwin replied wearily.

He sat down at his own desk chair as Armin scurried away from it as if it carried a bomb. Erwin stretched his back out with a small groan, earning a look of concern from the younger blonde.

"Are you all right? I could get you some pain killers if you'd like,"

"Don't treat me like I'm all high and mighty, Armin," the older blonde gave a warm smile. "It's just a small back ache from sitting hunched over a desk for half of the day, don't worry about it,"

"It's only natural for one to worry about their leaders," Armin replied with a soft mutter.

"Don't your eyes hurt from filing and signing paperwork all day? You should go back to your dorm and take a break for awhile," Erwin said as he sat back in his chair and played with a pen in his hand.

"Er... thank you, sir," Armin sighed in relief. "I'm available any time if you need help with anything here,"

"I'll keep that in mind,"

Before Armin reached the door, Erwin gasped softly and said, "Oh, I completely forgot. Armin, could you get my cloak from the barracks down in the training area? I left it there while I was talking with Levi before a meeting, and I forgot to get it back afterward,"

"Of course. I'll bring it back right away," Armin smiled.

As Armin left the Commander's office, he started off towards the barracks. He was walking at a considerably fast pace, mainly because he was lost in the train of thought. About the paper he read while Erwin was gone... it wasn't Erwin's possibility to be arrested that concerned him (though he cursed himself for not caring too much about it), it was the Female Titan that did. Not a lot of women in the Survey Corps are blonde, nor do they have shoulder length hair. But... it could be someone outside the Survey Corps... can it?

The blonde stopped dead in his tracks.

_'Blonde, shoulder length hair... 104th Trainee Squad... outside the Survey Corps... A woman...'_

He bit his lip as he put the pieces together.

_'It can't be... Annie?'_

**o0o0o0o**

Armin found his way behind the barracks in search of Erwin's cloak. The sun had already set and it was getting pretty late; If he didn't hurry now, he'd miss dinner (He was already late). He didn't expect it to take too long, but Erwin's office was just too far away from the god damn barracks. It was located deep within the castle near the other offices that belonged to fellow council members or professional strategists. As he peered through the barracks, he noticed something hanging from a hook near a stray stack of hay. It was dark green and had the Wings of Freedom embroidered on the back.

This whole time he'd been walking right past it. He felt like a complete dumb ass as he retrieved the cloak and folded it over his arm. With a small, defeated sigh, he turned to head back to the Commander's office, but was stopped as a hurried voice whispered behind him.

"We'll get caught if we stay here, let's go already... Not here,"

The blonde's curiosity was sparked as he made his way behind the stack of hay to investigate. He knew it was wrong to eavesdrop on someone... but he also knew that the voice belonged to Bertolt. Armin crouched low behind the stack of hay, debating whether to look around it or not.

"We'll only get caught if you keep complaining,"

"No, st – _ahh!_"

Armin's eyes slightly widened with minor surprise. He decided to take his chances and peek over the side of the stack of hay. However, this was a mistake he'd most likely regret. He saw Reiner on his knees before Bertolt, his head tucked between the taller male's legs while Bertolt wore a furious blush on his face.

"N- No... Reiner," Bertolt breathed as his hand found its way to Reiner's head.

Reiner ignored the large hand that weakly tried to push his head away and continued to pleasure his friend. His tongue darted out from between his chapped lips, teasing the slit and earning a breathy moan from Bertolt. Armin's eyes widened as he watched this; As much as he wanted to turn away, he just couldn't. It was too... interesting. He cursed himself for even thinking that... but it _was._

The blonde's slightly puckered lips took the head of Bertolt's manhood into his mouth and sucked lightly. His tongue continued to play with the slit in time with his sucks, but the pace was painfully slow. Bertolt let out a soft whimper as he received a rather hard suck.

"Quit teasing me alre – _nn-ahh – _already," the taller male panted.

"But I really like the noises you're making now," Reiner teased as he released Bertolt's cock, allowing it to throb almost painfully with the loss. "Do you really want me to stop now? Just look at how hard you are, it'd be so selfish if I left you like this,"

Bertolt shook his head reluctantly, earning a smirk from the blonde. He said nothing more, but instead he brought his mouth to Bertolt's manhood and teasingly licked the head. Bertolt let out a strangled moan, slightly bucking his hips to signal that he wanted more. Reiner skillfully coaxed the the taller male's manhood into his mouth using his tongue, bobbing his head as he slowly slid it deeper into his mouth. Bertolt felt the head of his cock hit the back of the blonde's throat and expect him to gag, or even release his manhood.

Surprisingly, the blonde payed no attention to it all; Instead, he softly hummed as he continued to deep-throat Bertolt, his firm hands slithering up the sides of his lover's legs. Bertolt found it harder to conceal his moans, and over time, he allowed more of his voice to pour out. Small moans and gasps left his mouth as Reiner's hands stroked his inner thighs, his head bobbing in time with his vigorous sucks. The taller male let out a loud, defeated moan as he bucked his hips, the tip of his cock hitting the back of Reiner's throat. Reiner let out a husky moan, his voice sending vibrations down the taller male's member.

Armin watched as this all happened; The image before him was _very _erotic, and over time, he found himself panting slightly with arousal. He caught himself and blushed in embarrassment as he noticed that he was hardening at the sight. As much as he wanted to leave, he also wanted to stay. He was almost desperate to see more. As he listened to Bertolt's moans and watched Reiner's skilled movements, he reluctantly reached down between his legs. His member was already fully hardened, pressing against the fabric of his boxers.

Small sucking noises started to issue from Reiner as he continued to treat his lover's arousal. His tongue skillfully slithered on the sensitive underside of Bertolt's pulsating manhood, earning a slightly louder moan that the last. As Bertolt grew comfortable with the scene, more of his voice left his lips, and Reiner just itched to make him even louder. Bertolt panted and moaned Reiner's name repeatedly, his hips bucking uncontrollably in pleasure. The blonde took Bertolt out of his mouth with a soft popping sound, licking both saliva and pre-come off his lips.

"Why... why'd you stop?" Bertolt whined.

"Don't be so impatient," the blonde growled as he aggressively nipped the head of Bertolt's cock, earning a soft yelp of both pain and pleasure. "I wanted to try something out,"

"Wh- what are you...?! Reiner!"

"It's okay, Bertl, scream my name,"

Reiner's index finger and thumb found their way to the head of Bertolt's manhood, squeezing it almost painfully. His tongue darted out from his mouth and licked over the sensitive head and his fingers, a surprised gasp of pleasure leaving the back of Bertolt's throat. The blonde's tongue found its way to the tip and ground itself against the slit, tasting the pre-come and earning an excited moan from above him.

"Does that feel good? You can't believe how sexy your moans sound right now," the blonde purred.

"R- Reiner, stop! I'm going to -"

Bertolt's sentence was interrupted by another excited moan as the blonde's free hand founds its way to his balls and skillfully rolled them between his fingers. He took it back in his mouth and sucked aggressively, finally pushing Bertolt over the edge. He came in Reiner's mouth, moaning repeatedly and slightly bucking his hips in the process. Waves of pleasure overtook him; He was completely unaware of how loud he was being. However, Reiner's didn't mind it, and nor did Armin.

Armin's eyes were still widened, his own neglected member now fully hardened and rubbing against his boxers with each movement. He watched as Reiner licked the taller male's seed off his lips and stood up from his knees; Now was the time to go. Armin felt terrible for watching them, but some side of him actually _enjoyed it. _He made a silent run for it, being careful not to knock anything over as he escaped back into the castle. It wasn't a very good time to see the Commander again, not with his obvious arousal. Instead, he left towards his dorm room, hoping to kill his fully hardened member on the way there.

**o0o0o0o**

Mikasa nuzzled her nose into the warmth of her scarf, one of her hands still wrapped around the doorknob. She had the urge to check up on Eren and Armin, mainly because of what Jean said to her before (_"If anything, you should pay more attention to them. I don't have to babysit them for you,"_). However, she knew that they deserved their own privacy like any other soldier... but what was this about them having a relationship and her not knowing about it? She couldn't deny that it sparked her interest in one way or another.

She opened the door and reluctantly stepped outside, making her way towards the boy's dormitories. If someone caught her, they would have been suspicious, but that didn't matter to her now. Mikasa sighed softly, wondering if she really made the right choice or not. She was already at the end of the hallway; It was too late to turn back.

**o0o0o0o**

Armin slipped into his dorm room and cursed himself highly. His arousal wasn't yet gone, but it was getting there. He expected Eren to be in bed by now, but he wasn't; Eren was sitting at Armin's desk, flipping through one of his books with only mild interest. The brunette turned and saw Armin standing at the doorway with a soft yet noticeable blush on his face.

"Hey Armin, where were you at dinner? I didn't see you,"

"I was working in Erwin's office. You wouldn't believe how many stacks of paperwork he has to go through every day, it's almost scary," Armin laughed awkwardly.

"I nearly died of boredom; Heichou worked my ass off with cleaning his god damn office... he knows how much I hate cleaning,"

The blonde couldn't help but laugh, accidentally dropping the cloak he had in his hand.

"Armin... what's that?" Eren said, pointing towards the blonde's crotch.

"N- nothing," Armin muttered as he picked up the cloak and tried to cover his front with it.

"It doesn't really look like nothing," Eren grinned as he stood up from his seat and walked towards the blonde.

"It's n- not my fault! I ran into Bertolt and Reiner while I went to go get Erwin's cloak, and – and I just – I couldn't – I -"

"Don't worry too much about it," the brunette laughed. "Your stuttering is actually kind of cute, you know,"

"S- Stop it! I -"

Armin was interrupted by a warm kiss. He let out a frustrated squeak instead of returning the kiss, breaking away and turning his head the other direction.

"You don't have to, it's fine," Armin muttered.

"I told you not to worry about it so much,"

Eren gave a devious smirk as his hand cupped Armin's cheek and gently guided him towards his lips. The brunette kissed him passionately, his lips moving as if it was acting on its own accord. Armin returned the kiss, his arms immediately snaking up the brunette's body and around his neck. They were pulled closer together, the blush on Armin's face intensifying greatly. Eren gingerly pushed him up against the wall, enjoying the small squeak of surprise he earned from his lover.

_(Mikasa shivered softly as she quietly walked down the corridors, tightening the scarf around her neck in a vain attempt to keep warm,)_

The blonde immediately slipped his tongue into the others mouth, earning a sharp intake of breath. Their lips stayed locked together perfectly like puzzle pieces, their tongues fighting for dominance (which, surprisingly, Armin won). Armin glued his tongue to the roof of Eren's mouth, sucking softly on his lips as he did so. Eren moaned into the kiss, causing the blonde to involuntarily buck his hips from both arousal and excitement.

_(She turned the corner at the end of the corridor, looking left and right for the next hallway to walk through. It had to be accurate; This wouldn't be the first time she lost herself in the castle at the dead of night. Who would blame her? It's almost pitch black,)_

Eren wrapped his hands around the blonde's body, picking him up and carrying him towards his bed. The blonde instinctively wrapped his legs around his waist, groaning softly into the kiss as his arousal ground against Eren's crotch. Eren laid him on his bed, breaking away from the kiss and earning a soft whine of disapproval from the loss. He wiped away the saliva that was connected from their mouths; It was almost embarrassing. With a soft grin, he pounced on Armin, the blonde moaning softly in response. Surprisingly, he seated himself comfortably between Armin's legs in the process, only making things much more heated between the two.

_(The clock at the very end of the hallway struck 8:37. It surprised Mikasa; It didn't feel like dinner happened at all. Then again, she did give her food to Sasha, so why should she be complaining?)_

With another smirk, Eren gently pinned the blonde's hands down to the bed. Armin whined in disapproval, however, he did somewhat enjoy being dominated like this. As he opened his mouth to complain, he was interrupted by another kiss, yet this time Eren was the one that led the kiss. Small sucking noises issued from the two, the blush on their cheeks a hard shade of scarlet. Eren felt himself start to harden; He decided to test the waters and rocked his hips against Armin. As he earned a soft moan from the blonde, he was encouraged to continue. The brunette ground his crotch onto Armin's arousal, sucking aggressively on his bottom lip as he did so.

_(Mikasa's footsteps now echoed around her as she hurried down the hallway. She didn't think that the two boys would be asleep, but even if they were, the visit would be worth it anyways,)_

As he continued to dry hump Armin, the blonde broke away from the kiss and let out an erotic moan. Their eyes were now opened, yet their irises were clouded with lust and desire. Armin wrapped his legs around Eren once more, bucking his hips to meet the brunette's movements. Eren leaned down and licked Armin's ear lobe, unpinning Armin's hands from the bed and slithering his own down to the blonde's thighs and gripping firmly. Armin moaned again, but this time it was in Eren's ear; It was enough to make Eren groan in pleasure. His grinding became more erotic, the bed squeaking softly with each movement.

_(Her eyes widened; Their room was just right in across the hall. She picked up her pace,)_

Armin's hands found their way to Eren's chest and pushed softly. "W- We shouldn't... What if we get caught...?"

"Yet you're already moaning," Eren teased as he gave a rather rough thrust, earning a sharp intake of breath. "Who would be out at this time, anyways? More importantly, who would be looking for us?"

"You put up quite the argument when you really want to," the blonde muttered.

Eren gave a small smirk, capturing the blonde's lips with his and kissing him vigorously. Their lips moved vividly, small sucking noises ringing throughout the room. They were loud, but not loud enough for someone to hear them in the room next to them, which was quite relieving. Armin wrapped his legs tighter around the brunette, the heels of his feet pressing into the small of Eren's back and pulling them impossibly closer.

_(Mikasa took the doorknob in hand, and with a hurried twist of the wrist, she opened the door,)_


	11. XI: Misfortune

**Note: **Did I go overboard on the last chapter? It's actually pretty scary, finding your brother and your best friend getting a little too close for your own comfort. Either way, I'm still quite pleased with what I produced out of both boredom and music with minor suggestive themes. I sound stupid, don't I? It happens. Either way, poor Mikasa for not knowing and doubting herself somewhere down the road. There will be more of her, don't worry; I want to quite some more Mikasa in there, whether it be Big Sister Mikasa or Productive Mikasa (yes, she's actually quite useful with her stealth *ahem* spoiler *ahem*). But hey, it's like they say, time waits for no one. The name of this chapter basically says it all... misfortune. Not just for Mikasa, though. Looks like Erwin's getting desperate and Levi's giving less of a shit by the day.

Chapter warnings: This chapter does contain some Levi (language) and very minor feels towards the end. This is why we can't have nice things, Mikasa. I love you, but I had to use the power of fanfiction on you. Q_Q Anyways, I don't really think there's any spoilers from the anime/manga, so don't worry too much. However, I was quite fond of writing a Levi and Erwin sibling moment (this is where heichou's height kicks in). Those two (Erwin/Levi) are actually quite OOC in this chapter, but it's only because I wanted to express their friendship a little more here. (They're best friends, and Levi happens to act and talk just like one.)

* * *

**_XI: Misfortune_**

"Eren... why...?"

The two boys immediately broke apart as the door creaked open, yet Armin was having quite some difficulty hiding his arousal. Mikasa stood at the doorway, completely dumbfounded at her discovery. Eren's blush refused to go away, whereas Armin was immediately overcome by both shock and fright. It _was_ Mikasa, who wouldn't be scared?

"Mikasa, what are you doing here?" Eren gasped, quickly climbing off the bed.

She nuzzled her nose into the folds of her scarf, immediately regretting coming here in the first place. 'The visit would still be worth it'? Why did she lie to herself like that? More importantly, why didn't they tell her about their relationship in the first place? Her eyes widened; Does Eren not trust her enough to tell her about a simple thing like this? Or was it really that simple?

"Why didn't you tell me before?" Mikasa said with a fake smile, "I would of understood if you told me. Do you not trust your own sister?"

"It's not that I don't trust you," Eren said with a slightly panicked tone arising in his voice. "It was a mistake not telling you before, I'm sorry. I didn't think you would of taken it so well, so we kept it hidden... until now,"

"Of course I'd take it well, isn't that what I'm doing now?"

"Mikasa," Armin called.

Their attention was now towards the blushing blonde. Mikasa's smile was gone; It pained her to keep something so cruel with her for so long. Armin sighed and sat up on the bed.

"We meant to tell you before, but it got lost on the way of life. I mean, really... if you cared for Eren, you wouldn't mind the relationship, would you? You'd want him to be happy, which he clearly is now," the blonde said weakly.

"Are you saying he's not happy with me?" Mikasa asked with a dangerous tone.

"I'm not saying that," Armin squeaked, "It's just that... well, there's nothing to be overprotective about here, is there? You've known me for how may years now? You can trust me with him... it's time for me to share the warmth from my end now,"

Mikasa licked her chapped lips; He was right... of course Eren would be happy with him. Her head was spinning with confusion. Before she wanted to break them apart and selfishly keep Eren for herself, but now some part of her wants them to stay together. Some part of her wanted Eren to be truly happy... without her. However... she shouldn't be afraid of tomorrow. She knew this was going to happen one day, and now's the time where she finally has to grin and bear it, not interfere. Eren wouldn't want that.

"But if anything happens -"

"- Then we'll take care of it," Eren cut her off immediately.

She nodded slowly and turned her back towards them. If Eren was happy, then she was happy to. But where was Armin in her thoughts? Mikasa didn't think any less of Armin, but more; It finally came into focus that their relationship was illuminated. How this happened, she didn't know, nor did she care (but some part of her did). Yet there was one thing that bothered her... no one wants to walk in on their brother and best friend having a little 'session'.

"As long as you're happy," Mikasa said with a smile on her face.

Was it really possible to hear a smile in someone's voice? Armin didn't know, and nor did Eren, but they knew for certain that Mikasa was actually happy with this. They gained Mikasa's approval, which Armin found quite funny in his head. You need to gain approval from your boyfriend's sister... that's something to look on.

"Mikasa," Eren continued, "You better start eating your food, okay? It's starting to scare me a bit. You're not eating, and that isn't good for humanity's second strongest soldier,"

Mikasa's eyes widened as tears welled in her eyes. She nodded again and walked away from the pair.

_'Eren, it's hard to think that you're actually scared about me skipping my meals. It's not that I'm trying to scare you, nor am I trying to get your attention. I just find it harder to eat nowadays... Even if I'm with you. Is that telling me... that..."_

She heard the door close behind her and click as it locked.

_"... I'm losing you?"_

**o0o0o0o**

Levi yawned softly as he made his way through the hallways and towards Erwin's office. He spent his previous night filling out paperwork and stayed up considerably late. It was a mistake, though; He had to wake up early the next morning for a meeting. Reaching out to the door knob and gripping it, he opened the door to the office and let himself inside without warning.

"Erwin, you still here? I need to talk -"

He was interrupted by a snore. This couldn't be; Erwin was actually asleep. The blonde's head rest on two folded arms upon his desk, his face turned to the side and in full view. He shook his head in disappointment; Erwin was being careless, leaving the window open behind him like that. Levi slammed the door behind him loudly in an attempt to wake Erwin up, but it failed; Instead, his eyes fluttered for a second or two, as if he was trying to ignore the raven and continue with his slumber.

"Hey, stupid shit, wake up," Levi complained as pulled out the chair in front of the blonde's desk and took a seat in it. "What, do you want me to force you to get up?"

A soft snort.

Levi sighed in disappointment and looked around the desk. He found a cup filled with quills and reached for it. The raven knew he'd regret this, but he took it in hand and dumped it over Erwin's head. The quills smacked onto his head, rolling onto the desk or on the floor. Erwin twitched slightly and let out another snort, burying his face deeper into his arms.

"You've got to be fucking me right now, how do you not wake up after something like that?" Levi said with a slight grimace as he stared at the mess he made.

"Levi, get out of my office... I'm too tired to deal with your shit..." Erwin groaned.

"So you're going to get up now, right?"

He gained no response.

Erwin heard the raven's footsteps as they walked away from him. He smiled softly as Levi faced grim defeat. The blonde snuggled deeper in his arms to gain some more warmth as a chill ran through his body, slowly drifting into sleep again. However, his victory was short lived; He felt a sharp pain on the top of his head as something gave off a rather loud thud. Another troubled groan left the back of his throat, but this time it was from pain and shock. Erwin looked up from his arms and rubbed his eyes furiously to see what was going on.

"You left me no choice, I had to do something about you," the raven laughed.

He saw that Levi was holding one of his books, and a rather thick one to be exact. With a soft sigh of defeat, he looked over to his bookshelf and saw that one of his books were missing. He rubbed his eyes again, laying back in his seat and stretching his back. It ached after what felt like days of sitting hunched over a desk.

With a small whine, he asked, "Son of a bitch, Levi, what do you want? I was actually starting to enjoy that nap by the time you came here, and_ hell_, was it refreshing,"

"Glad to know that I fucked it up for you," Levi said somewhat cheerfully as he sat back down in his seat. "Hell, it's good that I woke your ass up, you would of caught a cold. You were careless enough to leave the window open behind you,"

Erwin stopped in the middle of his stretch. "I didn't leave my window open..."

"Then what's that, smart one?" the raven said as he pointed towards the opened window behind Erwin. "Behold, the window! Bask in its glory!"

The blonde rolled his eyes at Levi and ignored the chill that ran through his office. Instead, his hand instinctively made its way to the piles of papers that were stacked messily upon his desk. Levi crossed one leg over the other and folded his arms impatiently. Erwin flipped through his paperwork; Every paper was there, except...

_'The document,'_

"Levi, look under you and see if you find a paper," Erwin said with a panicked tone in his voice as he searched his desk.

"I would of seen one by now," the raven said as he bit his lip.

"Remember that one document I showed you? The government suspects that I'm behind this bullshit, and I didn't get to read the last two paragraphs of it before I left for that meeting yesterday, I didn't have the time,"

"They're going to bust your ass," Levi grinned.

"For fuck's sake, this isn't the time to mess around! They'll ride my ass if I don't have that document with me, and more importantly, I think it contained information on the Female Titan,"

Levi's expressionless face didn't change as the blonde stared at him.

"You know, the one who killed Petra?"

"Don't push me," the raven said as he rolled his eyes.

"You don't understand, Levi! You're a god damn clean freak, how should you know what it feels like to lose something as important as a document -" _(Levi bit his lip and muttered, "You make it sound like the 57th expedition didn't happen, asshole,) _"- how many times has this happened to me? At times I wonder why they accepted me as Commander if this always happens, but for the love of fuck -"

"Hey Erwin, is your tongue in a comfortable position?"

"You don't under – I – under – what?" Erwin spluttered as he bit his lip with a confused look on his face. "Levi, I – what? I – I don't even -"

"I think I broke you," the raven grinned.

"Under – I – God damn it Levi, get real!" Erwin rasped in frustration, "You're always messing around! Would it kill you to take something seriously for once?!"

"The only reason I don't take it seriously is because you're being so dramatic about it," Levi said quietly, "In case you hadn't notice, Arlert has already been on the trail of the Female Titan for quite some time now, despite the distractions he's had lately. He's been reporting to me on who the Female Titan can possibly be, and I say we're hitting quite close to home,"

"Armin... you're not saying...?"

"Yes, he's really smart, even if he's not exactly on the path of adulthood yet. Either way, you're not the only one who's been victimized by Big Brother lately -" Erwin raised his eyebrow in minor amusement, "- I don't know who the Female Titan is for certain, or who's in league with the bitch, but the other day when we were planning out the formation, I found a strand of blonde hair caught on the windowsill,"

Erwin's eyes widened.

"It wasn't too long, but it was long enough to point us in the direction of a very small handful of soldiers here at the castle. It's either we were eavesdropped by someone outside the Survey Corps, or one of our soldiers leaked information,"

"I don't -"

"- Not as useless as you thought I was, huh?" Levi rolled his eyes. "I'm not sure who it was, but the hair was remarkably close to Arlert. It's not quite shoulder length, but it's somewhere around there,"

The blonde's eyes narrowed dangerously. "Why would you think it's Armin? Isn't he trying to help us?"

"Not too long ago, he was going on about Annie Leonhart being the Female Titan. From what I've heard, they were really good friends at a time, and how should you know if something didn't happen between the two that made him point fingers at her?"

"You're saying we should suspect Armin?" the blonde absentmindedly asked.

"Give me a reason not to,"

"First off, his loyalty to the Survey Corps is far too overwhelming for him to suddenly turn his back towards us, and second, was the hair you found a dark or light?"

"It wasn't dirty blonde, if that's what your asking," Levi replied impatiently.

"Exactly; Armin has dirty blonde hair, and let's get real, would he actually have the balls to eavesdrop on Corporal Levi who easily beat the shit out of Eren, the kid's best friend, and killed numerous Titans on his own? The little shit would never do that," Erwin said with only one inhale of breath.

"Breathe, you fuck ass, don't die trying to tell me this," Levi muttered. "Either way, I'm still going to suspect him whether you like it or not. You can never be too sure who's on your side and who isn't these days. Then again, it's never been peaceful within these walls. Like hell he'd get the better of me,"

"Well, there's one way he could. Now that I think of it... isn't he taller than you? I guess that gives him some advantage, depending on how you look at it,"

"You've got to be – Are you...?! Are you seriously – hold on a minute -" the raven spluttered.

"I think I broke you," Erwin grinned.

Levi scowled and laid back on his chair, folding his arms in frustration and throwing a fierce glare towards the blonde. Erwin's grin only widened in amusement.

**o0o0o0o**

Mikasa cursed herself as her tears sunk into her scarf, slightly darkening the color. She lay on the cool grass outside the castle (though it was still in the grounds), staring up into the beautiful night sky. The stars above her glistened like jewels, mildly enlightening her mood in the process. As another tear leaked from her eye, she sniffled softly and tightened the grip she had on her scarf.

She pulled the scarf off her neck and held above her; The stains from her tears were just visible between the folds. It was unlike her to cry, but this wouldn't be the only time in the past year. She isn't afraid to cry, nor does it put her to shame. Crying is the one thing that can comfort you at a time of need... it is the one thing that allows you to escape your hard headed madness for a short period of time. Mikasa brought the scarf back down to her eyes, wiping the tears away.

With another soft sniffle, she pulled the scarf away from her eyes and placed it above her heart, clutching it with both hands. It felt warm, comforting. She remembered the day Eren gave her the scarf. It was cold, especially without her parents there. Why did Death have to take its toll so early in her life? From someone so dear to her?

_'Mom... where was I to run to? No matter where I go, it'll be too cold without you and Dad,'_

Suddenly, everything came into focus; No matter who you are or what you do, you're never safe in this world. Whether your death be by Titan or by human, you're never safe. It's only up to Life whether it smiled upon you or not, granting you the privilege to live. Mikasa's eyes sunk deeper into darkness; Never again will she be afraid of tomorrow.

_'Mrs. Jaeger... It's almost blinding. I promised I'd keep him safe, but... I don't think that''ll go on much longer. I can feel it... I can't romance my ego like this, it just isn't going to happen anymore. I'll continue to fulfill that promise, but really... where will I go once I die? It's too cold living without Eren... then again, God may not allow me to remember him in the next life. I wonder if you still remember us now?'_

She sat up from the grass, shaking a few leaves and specs of dirt from her hair in the process. It was terribly dirty, laying on the floor like this... but as filthy as it was, it was surprisingly comforting. Was it just her, but was it oddly warm outside the castle? She looked up into the sky again, absentmindedly wrapping the scarf around her neck once more.

_'Why do I have this feeling? That I'll lose him? It's not because of Armin, is it? I know it's not, I trust him too much for that to happen. Ever since the 57th expedition, I've felt different. Was it because I nearly lost him to the Titans?'_

Another tear left her eye and dripped into the scarf. It was already darkened enough with her previous tears, and she didn't want it to get too wet. With a furious sniffle, she wiped her tears away with her hand instead, letting what remained of her scarf to tumble down her breast and swing gracefully with each breeze that came by. Despite the cold breeze brushing past her, she still felt the heat of the scarf over her.

_'Eren, if this scarf is part of you... what keeps you so warm?'_

A smile ripped across her lips. Of course Eren couldn't hear that, no one can, only her. Thank God, too... the mortification was just too great. She stood up from the ground and patted away the grass and dirt from her rear and back.

_'Thank God you can't hear me right now, Eren. You'd think I'm weak, huh? I know that one has to say exactly what's on their mind to get it across to the other person, but this is just one thing I can never tell you. We're related, but it's not by blood. Either way... I love you, more than a friend and more than a sister. I just wish that one day you can love me back, but right now, do me a favor and enjoy your time with Armin. I want you to be as happy as can be while it lasts,'_

It was for a brief moment, but Mikasa saw it; From the corner of her eye, a star twinkled brightly as she said her 'I love you' and asked Eren to be as happy as he could. It's weird, but it could have been a coincidence. However, she couldn't deny that it comforted her greatly. It only meant that she still had a small thread of hope to cling on to.


	12. XII: Blood Empty Promises

**Note: **Some JeanMarco coming your way. If only Marco were still alive, though... things would have been much better. Well, I don't know about Jean... he would of still been the pompous bastard he was before if Marco didn't die, right? Life sucks. I also added a bit of Annie and Marlowe in this chapter, too, but the chapter name basically says it all. A fluffy (or romantic, whichever you want to call it) Eremin scene coming your way; God knows what was going through my head when I wrote it down, but whatever. I'm still happy with the outcome.

The only chapter warnings there are is the minor language. I'll be completely honest, besides chapter 10, this fanfic has been quite mild... but not for long. *shifty eyes* o.o I have a lot in store, and I'm just itching to get it typed down. Oh well... patience is a virtue, correct? They're quite OOC here, but... meh. It just means I'm actually using the power of fanfiction. c:

Let me get this out: **For now on (starting this chapter), there will be some manga spoilers, whether it be major or minor. Given the way it's stated, this one is somewhat major, even if it's hidden within dialogue.**

* * *

_**XII: Blood Empty Promises**_

"Hey Marco, it's been awhile,"

Jean stood before a tombstone that read 'Marco Bott'. It's been a long time since he's last visited Marco's grave, but he really needed it this time. Whether Marco was actually looking over him or not, he didn't know, but he still wanted to pay his respects to the deceased. The graveyard itself was enough to give anyone goosebumps, but for some reason, Jean felt no cold weather in the area whatsoever. Was it because he was actually relieved to be at his friend's grave, or was he just running quite the fever?

He was holding a small bouquet of flowers in his hand; The small bundle of white roses seemed to compliment the grave. A soft breeze came by and brushed the petals of the roses, causing it to tremble violently as if it were threatening to break apart at any moment. Jean's grip on the flowers tightened as he came to his knees to rest while he talked to his deceased friend.

"Remember when you told me that I could be a leader someday? I'm not quite sure if I'm going to be able to live up to that, to be honest. A lot of things are going downhill for me,"

The puffy clouds above him started to darken over time. Jean was fully aware of this, but he didn't want to leave Marco just yet. As he talked, he held the roses closer to his heart, gradually starting to hug the bouquet as if it were a stuffed animal.

"But it's not like I'm not happy. I mean... I do miss you... but that's not the point right now, is it? I wonder if you're watching over me now, Marco. At times, I feel so alone without you being here with me... physically,"

He noticed that he was clutching to the bouquet and blushed in embarrassment. With a weak laugh, he brought the roses down to the grave and placed them above the small mound of dirt, right under his name. A few petals fell off the roses in the process, gliding through the wind as the breeze guided them in small circles and zigzags. They flew through the air, as swift as a bird, finally finding its way off into the clouds.

"Do you like it? I picked them just for you earlier today. I thought they were beautiful... the roses, they remind me of you. You're really strong, yet delicate at the same time... and both of you manage to comfort me, even when I'm in the worst of moods,"

A small breeze grazed the top of his head, as if Marco was actually petting him like he did before. It brought tears to Jean's eyes; It seemed like years when Marco used to play with his hair, lightly tugging on it or running his fingers through it. He used to always complain about it, but now, he'd give anything to feel those warm hands run through his hair again. It was agitating, but he actually missed it.

"How is like in the next life? Some people told me that you can actually rest in an eternal peace... is that true? Does it finally bring you happiness? Or do you even keep your memories there?"

Jean stood up from the grave and patted away some of the dirt on his knees. He turned his back on both grave and roses, slightly dipping his head in shame. Was he just yearning for the day of his death so he could live peacefully? That was something he wanted before, when he planned on joining the Military Force... but getting in the top ten was just short lived. It was his rival that pushed him into the Survey Corps, and for some reason, he started to enjoy his time there.

"I'll bring you even more roses next time... I know how much you like them. And... if you don't mind me asking..." Jean bit his lip. "... does it hurt to die?"

It was a rather foolish question, but he wanted to know. Either way, Marco wasn't actually there with him and he couldn't receive a decent answer, but it was at least worth the try. It was worth the embarrassment if it ends up bringing you some comfort, right? It's not like he was afraid for the day God finally called him home... he just wanted to see Marco again. A weak thought, but comforting in its own ways.

"Next time I come, I'll bring good news... or at least I hope,"

A small ray of sunshine broke through the dark clouds above him, illuminating the area in which he stood. His eyes widened as the dim rays of sunlight covered him in warmth, as if he was given a thick blanket in the dead of winter. A weak smile slowly spread across his lips.

"I knew that would cheer you up,"

**o0o0o0o**

Large droplets of rain splashed onto the clouded window, smudging the view of the street and buildings outside. Its been awhile since its actually rained in the area, but as much as people wished for it, they still scattered to safety at the very touch of it. Despite the silent celebration of farmers, the rain itself made it much harder for carriages to go through the streets safely. Even with the dangers, there was always someone itching to carelessly venture into the rain.

"Annie, please, listen to me,"

"What more is there to listen to?"

"Annie," Marlowe pleaded.

The blonde clicked her tongue impatiently and ignored the hand that firmly gripped her arm. She turned her head back at Marlowe, the desperate look he had on his face sending a slight pinch of remorse in her heart. With an impatient growl, she tried to shake his hand off and get away.

"Look, I made it clear to you that this was going to happen, yet you still chose to stick with me," Annie snapped.

"I stuck to you because I care!" the man continued, "It doesn't matter if they threaten you, really! Just stay with me... I don't want you to go to Karanese with _them_, especially at a time like this! Look out the god damn window and tell me there's absolutely nothing wrong at this time,"

She looked out the window and stated plainly, "There's absolutely nothing wrong at this time,"

Marlowe let out an impatient hiss, the grip on her arm only tightening further. "I don't want anything to happen to you, Annie, please... not when it's pouring out. How can I be too sure that you'll be safe when you're out there, how are you too sure they'll even stick to their side of the deal?"

"I can trust him with my life," Annie said as her free hand gripped his wrist tightly, earning a sharp intake of breath. "If I really wanted to, I can snap your wrist in the blink of an eye. Do you really want that, having it just recovered recently?"

"I don't care what you threaten me with, you can't do this,"

"If we don't strike now, there will be no telling where they hide Eren next. I already showed you the document I took from Erwin's office; It states clearly that they're suspecting both him and the Survey Corps. Now will be the best time to get our hands on him, even if it means losing my life in the process,"

"I know I'm probably making you regret ever making that confession," Marlowe laughed weakly, "and I also know that this isn't any of my business. I just don't trust that one guy... what's his name again... Reiner?"

A curt nod.

"You'll never know the outcome, and I just can't bring myself to trust him. If your next _mission _goes wrong, you may lose your life, and they may be revealed in the process. You can't go at this time, especially after you took those documents. Erwin isn't an idiot, he probably noticed right after you took it from him. His guard is up, and so are many others,"

"We're not the average soldiers," the blonde growled, "I'm fully aware that his guard's up, but most of the soldiers there are too fucking scared to even encounter someone in battle. They're just there so they actually have food and water, don't you understand? It'll go exactly as planned, so you shouldn't worry too much about me,"

Marlowe finally decreased the strength he had on his grip, allowing Annie to aggressively slap his hand away. She strode towards the door, picking up a small backpack in the process. The man finally snapped to his senses and grabbed one of the arms of the backpack, earning a reproachful glare.

"Annie, what about this relationship? Don't you know what will happen if you die? You don't know what I'd do, you know I can't help but worry,"

She finally gave in and dropped the backpack on the floor with a dull thud, fully facing Marlowe. Her look was now somewhat softened, earning a very small sigh of relief.

"Things would only go terribly if you interfere, Marlowe," Annie breathed, "If you truly 'loved' me, you'd understand that. You'd understand that this is left to us and should be out of your concern. If you try and stop me, you'll just get in the way... _you_ can die,"

Marlowe's breathing was now uneven, pressure building up at the base of his nose and under his eyes. He could feel himself being pushed to the brink of crying, but he'd never let Annie see that. Instead, he blinked repeatedly and turned away from her.

"Don't you see? Do you really want to leave me here?" the blonde asked.

"You always put up quite the argument when you really want to," Marlowe replied bitterly.

"Promise me that you won't interfere,"

A small pause.

Marlowe turned back to Annie unexpectedly threw his arms around her. Though the embrace caught her completely off guard, she accepted it anyways. Returning the hug, the man nuzzled the top of her hair, his hold on the blonde only strengthening. Despite the tight hold, the atmosphere around them was still very cold and threatening, but Annie was too busy to notice this.

"You have my word," the man muttered. "But it's only on one condition: Be careful and come back to me afterward,"

The blonde smiled softly. "I'd never think of leaving you,"

**o0o0o0o**

"Armin, I'm starting to get sleepy..."

Eren and Armin were both in their dorm room, seated upon Eren's bed together. Armin sat comfortably between Eren's legs with his back towards him, casually reading one of his books as he did so. They were in this position for quite a long time; They usually spend their time together like this early in the mornings, either reading together or whispering sweet things into each others ears. The brunette had his arms wrapped around Armin, snuggling further into his hair and earning a soft giggle of approval.

"You can sleep here if you want, I don't mind," Armin muttered, absentmindedly turning the page.

"I'll only sleep if I'm laying with you in my arms," the brunette protested.

Armin let out a soft giggle and laid back in Eren's lap, looking over his shoulder at his lover. Eren greeted the blonde with a soft peck to the lips, tightening the hold he had around him. He was still sat upright as the blonde sunk lower into his lap, down to the point where he was basically laying down, his head resting comfortably on the brunette's lower stomach. Eren moved the position of his hands; Instead of them being wrapped around Armin, they were now playing with his hair, lightly tugging and prodding.

"Will you tell me a story? I'm getting quite bored of this," the blonde said, slightly waving his book as he did so.

"You're actually bored of reading? I never thought this day would come," Eren laughed, continuing to run his fingers through his lover's hair.

Armin looked up at Eren and pouted, "Hmph... pwease?"

The brunette smiled softly as he untangled his fingers from Armin's hair. "Hm... I'm not quite sure,"

Armin snapped his book shut and laid it near his feet. He removed himself from Eren's lap momentarily, only to face back towards the brunette. As Armin crawled over him, Eren leaned in and kissed him lightly on the lips. The blonde pulled away from the kiss in surprise as he felt Eren bite down softly on his bottom lip. He felt his face smolder in a strong blush as his hands found their way to Eren's hair and pulled in protest.

"Mnn... don't... bite me," the blonde whined between small giggles.

"Why not? It's so fun," Eren smiled as he playfully nipped at his bottom lip.

The soft squeaking of his bed was heard as he gently pushed Armin off him and pinned him down onto the sheets, the book falling to the floor with a dull thud. He nipped at his lips once more, earning another playful whine.

* * *

**Extra Note: **Yes, I know Marco's body was burned, but due to the power of fanfiction, they buried him instead! *Evil laughter*


	13. XIII: Hide and Seek

**Note: **I'm only going to say this once; There are some manga spoilers in here that are given in subtle hints. There's also some language and a little more Mikasa for you. No, she's not being the big sister that she is, she's actually useful. But when it's cut down to Armin, she decides to test how smart he really is. I think I made the foreshadowing here a bit too obvious... ah, life. If I messed anything up, please tell me! There's usually a lot of mistakes in my works (I never do proof-read) and I always have to go back and fix it while hoping nobody notices. Oh, life, what have you done? I added a little bit of Marlowe in here because he just happens to be in my interest (for writing) at the moment, and I end up losing Eren on the way of life. (No, really, even I don't know where he's at later on in this chapter... I'm terrible.)

* * *

_**XIII: Hide and Seek**_

Mikasa strolled through the chilled corridors of the castle, using her free time to get away from her work. Since she was ranked number one at graduation, people considered her a prodigy, and today they just happened to piss her off more than usual. Besides the usual trainee or two (three, depending on her luck) asking for advice on maneuvering, drawn out meetings, and pointless shifts around the castle (for duty), her days were quite enjoyable. She was already lost in thought up to the point where her easygoing walk turned into a forced trot.

It was _very _unlike her to think of pointless things, like getting a new dress sometime after thinking over Eren's comment on it (_"Mikasa, how long have you had that dress, anyways? I should get you a new one for Christmas,"_). The weather was already getting fierce, so it'd be pointless, yet Mikasa couldn't help but think about Eren. It wouldn't be the only time that Eren was on her mind, but this time felt different. Was it because of Armin? More importantly, why should she be worrying about those two when she should be worrying about arriving on time to meetings or getting to the right post at the dead of night to secure the streets?

A rather violent gust of wind brushed against her, the ends of her scarf and the bottom of her dress fluttering lazily in response. It'd be best to go back to her dorm now, or maybe even the dining hall to get breakfast. Before she turned back, she heard a rather harsh thud against the door next to her. She couldn't deny that it took her by (very minor) surprise, but what was more important was what caused that to happen. As she neared the door, she started to hear voices issue from behind the door.

Mikasa crouched low against the wooden door and lightly pressed her ear against it. She strained herself to hear the voices and noticed that there were only two. One sounded like a man, and the other a woman.

"Look at that, they're finally catching on to me -" She heard the rustle of paper being unfolded and a small laugh, "- but they still think Erwin has something to do with all this,"

Mikasa immediately recognized this voice; The one who was talking was Annie, one of her comrades that left to the Military Police to 'save herself'. She cautiously pressed her ear harder against the wooden surface to hear the conversation better. Her breathing was now dangerously shallow; Her discovery would promise a rather harsh argument, or even a fight.

"So what do we do now? No one knows you're here, right?" a low voice asked, who Mikasa again recognized as Reiner, another one of her comrades.

"Don't worry about it, Marlowe's keeping me covered. Yesterday was the perfect time to leave Stohess because of that storm we had. It's easy to assume that someone's terribly sick in bed after such a heavy rainfall,"

"That's good, then. I didn't tell Bertl that we were here, mainly because I know he wouldn't agree with what he had in store. He's too soft for that. What do you plan on doing now that you're here, anyways?"

"Well, it'd only make sense that I go after Eren now -" Mikasa's hand immediately went for the scarf around her neck and gripped intensely with anger, "- but what about Ymir?"

"Ymir knows a lot more than we do on this subject, but that doesn't mean she has the answers to it all. We need to get to that basement before Commander Erwin does, and Eren's the one that has the key, not Ymir. So why would we need her?" Reiner asked.

A small creak of a chair was heard from across the room.

"We'll need all the help we can get, Reiner. We may not know much about her, but that doesn't concern me now. I have the -" another violent gust of wind flew by Mikasa, bringing a howl along with it and blocking out the next few words, "- be able to handle it,"

"Exactly why – why I didn't b- bring Bertl," the man coughed uneasily. "When you go after Armin, make sure he's alone. Don't be so rash; Don't let anyone see you,"

Mikasa's eyes widened as she heard this.

_'So, Annie, you're going for Eren and Armin? I don't know what's going on, but I sure as hell know that you're not going to get away with this. I won't let you touch them. Next time, choose the location of your meetings cautiously, you stupid bitch,'_

She stood up from her position on the ground and quietly patted the dirt off her dress. As she stalked away cautiously, only two things were on her mind; Report to Commander Erwin and warn Eren and Armin.

**o0o0o0o**

"So Christmas is coming up, doesn't that mean I have to slave away finding a gift for you?"

A small grin formed on Eren's lips as he heard this. He put down his cup and wiped his mouth with his sleeve, the blonde in front of him watching him through intense eyes.

"If anything, I should be the one spending most of my time trying to find you a present. Or making you one, if I'm not so clumsy," Eren finally replied.

He felt someone's hand on his shoulder.

As Connie gained Eren's attention, he asked, "What do you think I should get Sasha? I was thinking of getting her a sack of baked potatoes, but that would only offend her,"

Armin coughed into his drink from laughter and tried to hold it in so he wouldn't choke to death. The brunette tried to hide his laughter behind the back of his hand and by biting his lip; It was clear that Connie was actually serious about this, but why the hell did he have to bring that up? He didn't want Connie to see him as a disrespectful person, but Armin already failed on that part.

"Well, it depends what she likes. You could go with a Christmas card, a scratchy sweater, even,"

"No, a card would make me look like a cheapskate, and everyone hates Christmas sweaters," Connie whined.

"A sack of potatoes would be nice," said a small voice behind them.

"Sasha?!"

Both Eren and Armin were laughing in unison as they saw the bewildered look on Connie's face. Sasha set her tray next to him and immediately started to devour the loaf of bread on it. He was blushing in embarrassment, muttering something about 'sneaky' and 'Christmas' under his breath. They all continued to eat their meal, and as the time passed by, Armin noticed that Mikasa wasn't there yet.

He thought of reporting to Eren, but instead, he kept his head low. As he eyed the clock behind Eren on the wall, he didn't notice that Eren stood from his seat.

"I'm going to go to Heichou's office for awhile; He wants to discuss something with Hanji, Erwin, and I... I swear to fuck I'm going to die of boredom," Eren groaned.

"I'll make sure I find you something for Christmas while you're gone," Armin snickered, earning a reproachful look from the brunette.

"I'll skin you alive," He replied, giving a warm smile before walking away and sinking into the swarm of other soldiers that arrived for breakfast.

Amongst the soldiers who came in was Mikasa, who wore a rather concerned look on her face. Armin was going to call out to her but thought otherwise and she gave him a glare that basically said _'I'll rip your balls off and nail them to the floor'_. He hasn't seen her this upset in awhile now; Surely it wasn't because of him? As she made her way to their table, Armin moved over one so she could sit next to him.

However, instead of sitting next to him, she came to a halt on the seat in front of him. She didn't really sit down, she just rest one of her knees on it. With a small sigh of frustration, she leaned over towards the blonde.

"Where's Eren?"

Armin bit his lip. "He's in a meeting right now. What do you need?"

"It has to do with -" her eyes dangerously narrowed as she looked over her shoulder, "- Reiner -" at that moment, Reiner walked in through the doors with a rather irritated expression on his face, "- and right now isn't exactly the best time for us to talk. I want you to be _very_ careful around here -" her voice dropped to a low whisper as Reiner sat next to the blonde, "_- Hide and seek, Armin,_"

Armin was taken aback by her last words. Hide and seek... surely she didn't mean...?

"Hey Armin, have you seen Bertl? I've been looking for him everywhere," Reiner asked with the usual stern look he had on his face.

Mikasa pulled away from them and left the table immediately. Her eyes burned with anger; How dare he talk to Armin as if they were actually friends. She couldn't deny that she felt she had to protect Armin too, but Eren was her first priority. Her dress fluttered behind her as she walked out of the dining hall and followed the path that lead to Erwin's office.

_'Armin, don't let me down now. I know how smart you really are, and if those last four words didn't sink in, you're screwed. I'm sorry I didn't explain thoroughly, but I'm sure you figured it out by now. Tell me that you understand,'_

She took one last look at the doors to the dining hall before turning the corner.

_'Be wary of them,'_

**o0o0o0o**

The bed creaked uneasily as Marlowe threw himself upon it. After a boring day of standing in the hot sun for hours on end, he finally got the chance to rest for awhile. It had only been three days since Annie left, and he couldn't deny that he was worried. He kicked off his boots and allowed them to fall to the floor along with the belts around his legs. Usually, Annie would be there to scold him for being too lazy to properly put his Gear away, or even bring him some water if she was in the right mood.

The silky curtains on his window were fluttering frantically as the breeze flew into his room, scattering the papers on his desk and brushing over his body. It felt nice and soothing against him, but it still didn't effect his overall mood. He missed Annie dearly; Was that stupid to say after its only been three days? The way she left him there on a rainy night, getting drenched in the cold in an attempt to leave Stohess unnoticed. It's idiotic, but it was necessary.

Wouldn't it be right to go after her? Marlowe let out a troubled sigh as he remembered the promise he made her. It certainly lacked the blood... but it wasn't like she noticed. He really didn't want to break that promise, but what choice did he have left? If Annie was really going to push herself into capturing Eren, she may get caught. The government won't have any mercy on her as they did with Eren. It was dangerous, and numerous officials are already on their guard.

It's stupid to think that Annie would actually carry out this plan. Deep in his heart, he couldn't control the anxiety that came from thinking about Annie. What if she gets captured, or worse, killed? As well planned out their mission may sound, every plan fails in one way or another, whether it be sweet or murderous. Nothing gets the desired results. This fact made Marlowe's eyes widen.

He sat up on his bed and reached for his boots again. He slipped them back on his feet, reaching for the rest of his Gear with only one thing in mind; If anything was going to happen, it'd be to him, not Annie. In other words, he'll be a replacement. A mere toy to be broken by a small child, like hundreds have before him.

_'I appreciate your honesty and trust, but there's no possible way that I'm going to let you carry this out. As much as I enjoy the idea of you finally finding your answers, and possibly happiness... without me... there's still no way I'm going to let you go out there like that. It's careless,'_

He quickly closed the window shut, denying the softening rays of sunlight entrance. It immediately grew dark in his room, but it didn't matter anyway. His bed creaked uneasily as he climbed off it and walked towards the door. Gripping the doorknob, he bit his lip in hesitation.

_'This whole time I knew who you were and I knew what you were planning to do, yet I never told anyone about it. Does this mean I'm betraying humanity? That Eren kid... if you do take him, wouldn't that be a very heavy loss to humanity?'_

Wrenching the door open, he slightly ground his teeth together in both frustration and jealousy. It's inhumane to actually be jealous of Eren, a Titan, and what's more is that he's in a relationship with one. Not that it bothered him, but it finally hit him quite clearly that he's basically committing treason against mankind.

_'Why should I care, anyways? What does it matter if I really am betraying humanity or not? These walls won't last forever, and I already gave my life away as a soldier. I'll probably die sooner than later, with or without Annie. This world... it's cruel,'_

The sun was already setting over the horizon, which took Marlowe by full surprise. It really didn't feel that late, and he's probably going to miss dinner. But that was just another very little thing to worry about... what was most important now was Annie, and nothing more.

_'The government won't take you so lightly, Annie. That one kid... Eren... I heard that the only reason why he's still alive is because of Corporal Levi. Think about it, you idiot. Levi won't be there for you, and the shit that happened during the 57__th__ expedition? This... it's almost suicide. I care about you, you little shit... aren't you afraid of the consequences? They'll kill you on the spot, '_

He walked through the streets and ignored the soldiers that greeted him on his way to Karanese. No one knew where he was going, and he wouldn't have the excuse of 'I have a fever' this time around. It would of slipped by three days ago, but not now. He cursed himself for it; He should of taken that advantage to follow Annie instead of staying useless at home.

_'Is it possible... that __**I **__can save __**you **__this time?'_

**o0o0o0o**

Mikasa knocked on the door, yet her fury got the best of her and sounded more like a dying plead that it did a normal knock. She was standing at Erwin's door, praying that he wasn't in a meeting at the moment. As much as she liked the sound of telling _everyone _at that meeting about Annie's intentions, it's still best to keep it as quiet as possible at the moment. She heard a muffled voice approving her to come in, so she opened the door and walked inside.

Erwin sat at his desk, and it looked as if he just absentmindedly invited her inside. No one else was there with him, but that only made Mikasa enlighten. However, she couldn't deny that she was oddly confused, since the Commander would usually be at meetings during this time. She closed the door behind her quietly and walked to his desk. The footsteps finally made him look up from his paperwork.

"Ackerman?" the blonde questioned.

"May I sit, Commander?" she asked politely.

"But of course,"

It felt odd, sitting in one of the Commander's seats, but she didn't allow herself to get too comfortable. The main reason why she was iffy here was because the fact that she was still fuming over Annie, and what was more was that Erwin didn't look too happy at that moment.

"You look terrible, Mikasa, are you all right?"

His concern took her by full surprise. "Er... yes, sir, I'm fine, thank you,"

"You don't have to be so formal with me," Erwin laughed, sitting back in his seat and dropping his paperwork back on his desk. "What did you need at a time like this?"

"I thought you'd be in the middle of a meeting, so I hesitated at first," Mikasa sighed.

"It didn't really sound like you hesitated," he grinned, earning a blush of embarrassment. "I was attending a meeting earlier, but it was cut short by Rico, who delivered me some documents that I'd rather read alone than with a group of people,"

"Was Eren amongst those people?" Mikasa asked frantically.

"Yes, he was, but I'm sure he's with Levi at the moment," the blonde replied with a rather reproachful look.

"There was something I needed to report to the both of you, but -"

"If it's about the Female Titan, I'd rather have it between you and I. Whatever you find out may be reported to Armin, too, but right now it's best we keep it from Eren. If we go and worry him about the Female Titan, it may effect his Titan-shifting abilities, which is something Hanji will be discussing with him now,"

"How will it... effect...?"

"We're unsure if emotions have a cause and effect to his shifting abilities, and if the Female Titan is a friend of his, it may trigger something unwanted to humanity," Erwin said, slightly groaning as he stretched his aching back.

"I've been thinking... maybe Annie is the Female Titan?"

A small pause.

As Erwin finished his stretch, he asked, "How could you support that statement?"

"I was walking through the hallways this morning, and I heard her talking to a soldier here at the castle about Eren..." Mikasa hesitated for a moment. "... something about the government suspecting you, and capturing Eren..."

"It's believable, but why would someone in the Survey Corps want to betray humanity like this?" the blonde growled.

"I'm unsure, sir,"

"It's much to ask for a trainee, but would you be willing to go to wall Sina to investigate within the Military Police?" he asked.

"I'm sorry, but it oddly hurts to say no to your offer, sir," Mikasa replied bitterly.

She didn't want to leave Eren alone here at the castle, especially with the threat she heard earlier. Erwin sensed this and rested his head upon two folded hands.

"Or would you rather stay here at the castle? I don't know if Levi would be okay with this, but would you be willing to guard the castle at night?"

She bit her lip at the tempting offer. "Why are you suddenly so confident, if I may ask?"

"We can't get to wall Maria without Eren, and if there's a threat posed to him, we have to do everything and anything to protect him," Erwin smiled warmly.

Mikasa hesitated for a moment before opening her mouth once more.

"The heights of my stealth shall be given to humanity and no other,"


	14. XIV: Christmas Wishes

**Note: **The chapter takes place on Christmas Eve and the last couple of hours of Christmas Day. I know it's not Christmas anymore, but there's nothing better than Christmas in February, is there? (Happy Valentine's day, though it's too late to say that... meh.) Anyways, I made this chapter to add in a little more mentions of Erwin/Levi, Levi/Petra, Jean/Armin, and Eren/Armin and to show that the Christmas spirit is starting to put their guard down... which really isn't a good thing in the situation they're in. I'm kinda throwing these pairings everywhere, but oh well. Live with me. The chapter is going to be a bit soft on some parts and rough on others, but in the end of the day, it lives up to the chapter name. I'll give you an early warning: The next chapter or two contains drunk Levi.

A drunk Levi... don't worry, guys... I gots this.

* * *

**_XIV: Christmas Wishes_**

_(Karanese District)_

_(December 24th, Christmas Eve; Noon)_

The cold weather of December was finally starting to take its toll. Inches of snow covered the ground and most of the soldiers already had terrible coughs. Worse of all, some soldiers still had to stand guard in the castle grounds during this time, in fear that their own hands and feet will fall off. Armin and Jean were one of the pairs of soldiers that had to stand guard in the castle, but what they were guarding the castle against was a complete mystery to most.

Armin wasn't quite fond of duty, especially during this kind of weather, not to mention that it was boring as hell. He usually hid a book in his jacket and took it out to read once their superiors left. Jean, on the other hand, didn't bring anything with him to pass the time; Instead, he would start idle conversations with Armin, or even take a nap if he got too comfortable. However, despite the terrible weather and boredom, he always had some sort of way to start up a conversation in the palm of his hand.

"Why are we here again?"

"It's witchcraft called 'duty'," Armin absentmindedly replied as he turned the page of his book.

"If this is duty, then why are you reading? Shouldn't we be 'guarding' this section of the castle?" Jean complained, taking a seat next to Armin on the cold ground. "What are you reading, anyways?"

Armin placed a thin piece of paper between the pages he was reading and closed the book, handing it to Jean with a small grin on his face.

"I'm not quite sure if you'd be interested in a cheesy Christmas story, but go right on ahead,"

"Christmas? Holy shit, I nearly forgot that Christmas was tomorrow..." Jean gasped.

"It's not only Christmas, y'know. It's also someone's birthday, but I still don't know who it is. I just heard the Commander and Hanji talking about it a couple of times while I was in his office," the blonde replied, watching as Jean flipped through the pages of his book (though he had some difficulty because of the thick gloves he wore).

"What do you want for Christmas?" Jean asked.

Armin let out a soft laugh and turned away from the taller male, laying back closer against the wall and rubbing his hands together in a vain attempt at keeping warm. Jean tried to ignore this as he closed the book, still waiting for an answer. As he gave Armin his book back, he noticed that the blonde's hands looked oddly stiff. It took him by surprise; Armin's hands must be stone cold by now.

"Jesus, Armin, your hands are frostbitten," Jean growled.

He took off the gloves on his hands and tried to hand them to Armin, though he refused it immediately. "Think about yourself, Jean, don't worry about me. I'll be fine,"

Jean watched as the blonde tried to turn the page in his book with difficulty and ended up dropping it on his lap. He let out a soft curse under his breath and blushed in embarrassment.

"No, you're not," Jean said, grabbing the blonde's wrist. "You can't even read that damned book without some sort of problem, and I know how much you love reading,"

"Jean, stop it," Armin muttered as he tried to pull away from Jean's grasp.

The taller male kept a firm hold on his wrist and ignored the resistance. After he forced the first glove onto his hand, he gained almost no resistance for the other. Armin bit his lip as a small huff left him, pulling his hands away and tucking them under his arms.

"See, doesn't that feel warm?"

"... Yes, it does..." Armin murmured reluctantly, earning a warm smile from Jean. "... Thank you,"

Jean snatched the book out of Armin's lap and earned a small gasp of protest. He let a laugh escape the back of his throat as he opened the book at the location of the small bookmark.

"You can't turn the pages with that quite easily, either. Let me read to you,"

Armin's eyes widened as he heard this. He couldn't say no to an offer like that... and hell, he was curious of how fluent Jean's reading actually was. The blonde nodded his approval laid back against the wall, turning his face towards Jean to watch.

Jean blushed in embarrassment. "Sorry if I'm total shit with reading aloud, I'm not a bookworm like you,"

As he started to read from the top of the page, Armin smiled softly.

_'I don't see what's so wrong with your reading, Jean. It's no different than anyone else... but for some reason, I find your voice quite soothing. Should I be cursing myself for it?'_

**o0o0o0o**

_(Christmas Eve, 11:40 PM)_

Levi flipped through the pages of his book with only very mild interest. A small shiver ran down his spine, goosebumps erupting on his skin in the process. Why he was still awake was unknown, even to him. The clock above him was ticking rather loudly as the time dragged on. As he finally closed his book with an irritated 'tch', he heard a knock at his door.

He didn't word his approval, but only let out a tired grunt to signal that he was there. The doorknob turned slowly and the door creaked open, revealing none other than Erwin. He stood at the door, motionless for a second, before making his way to Levi's desk. The blonde shut the door behind him carelessly, the loud 'bang' making both of them wince. Levi let out a hiss of disapproval.

"What do you need?" Levi asked.

Erwin leaned himself on the desk instead of sitting in the empty chair next to him, acting as if it wasn't even there. Despite the fact that he was being careful not to knock anything over or wrinkle any papers, he still gained a rather bitter look from the raven. He didn't often give Erwin this look, but it was probably because he was tired; The dark bags under his eyes were very noticeable.

"It's nearly Christmas Day... are you excited?"

The raven let out a soft laugh before dropping his quill onto the desk and leaning back in his chair. "Why should I be excited? Satan isn't going to leave anything under the fucking tree, is he?"

"That's not exactly what I meant," Erwin muttered as he gradually let more of his weight pour onto the desk, resulting in it to squeak softly.

"If you break my desk, I'll make sure the Military never finds your body," Levi growled.

"Your desk isn't what concerns me now," he fully seated himself on the edge of the desk, earning a reproachful look, "Why don't we go out and enjoy our time tomorrow? You know, it's Christmas... your birthday,"

"We don't have time to fuck about, Erwin, now get your ass off my desk,"

"We don't have time? May I ask what you've been doing lately, besides crying over Petra's locket?" Erwin teased.

Levi shot a dangerous glare at the blonde. Was he really going to go that far? Either way, Petra was another fallen soldier... it's history. Levi had already decided to turn the page and treat it like another book, but toying about her death will never be an exception, no matter the circumstance or person.

"What I do with that locket is none of your concern," he shot back at the blonde. "This conversation isn't even about Petra, anyways. What happened is history now, and it's nothing to worry about anymore. The only thing I want to know right now is why the hell you're here,"

A warm smile ripped across Erwin's lips. "If you want to talk about it, go right ahead,"

"What's wrong with you, Erwin? If you're tired, go to sleep, don't freak me out," Levi muttered coldly.

"I'm not trying to scare you, and I'm perfectly fine right now. If anything, you should be the one that goes to sleep. Anyone can see the bags under your eyes from miles away. I'm fully awake, and if actually giving a damn about your best friend is a crime, go right ahead and sue me,"

Levi stretched out his back and said, "Don't get pissy with me. It's not likely for you to come to me out of the blue and try to comfort me with whatever the hell is happening in my shitty life,"

"You haven't been sleeping or eating lately, have you?" Erwin nudged on, "What concerns me now is why. If you need any help, I'm here for you,"

"Before I answer you, I want to know why the fuck you're on my desk," the raven spat.

"I just really wanted to piss you off,"

Levi let out a heavy sigh and rested his head on two folded hands.

"I swear I just died a little inside," he murmured bitterly.

Erwin chuckled softly and finally stood up from the desk. It creaked again, only this time it was much louder, as if it was threatening to break at any moment. He walked around the desk and stopped behind Levi's chair. He gripped the chair and pulled it back, along with Levi, earning a strangled cry of protest.

The raven looked over his shoulder and snarled, "The hell are you doing, you little shit? It's really cold here, put me -"

His sentence was immediately cut short as he felt something soft press against his lips. His eyes widened; Erwin's face was much too close to him, much too close for comfort. One of Levi's hands made their way up to slap Erwin, but instead, it gently gripped the side of his face as if it had a mind of its own. For some reason, he was enjoying the kiss. As his eyes started to close, he immediately snapped back to reality and forcefully pushed the blonde away from him.

"The fuck was that for...?" Levi asked fiercely.

The blonde grinned cheekily. "My parents always told me that a kiss or two could calm someone down, but maybe that doesn't apply to humanity's strongest soldier,"

"Parenting, what have you done?" he softly groaned under his breath.

"Levi," Erwin said as he gripped the raven's shoulders. "You're starting to worry me. Why aren't you sleeping, and more importantly, why aren't you eating? You're still here with us for a reason, you didn't come back just to starve yourself. Was it the 57th expedition that hit close to home this time?"

Levi looked down at his hands that had immediately balled into fists. His eyes were slightly sunken, and it's true, he's been skipping his meals. He didn't personally know why he did it... he just didn't feel the need to eat as much as he normally would. He would spend most of his time locked up in his office, completely shut out of the broken world beyond his office or room. Erwin fixed his eyes on Levi and saw a small shiver run down his spine.

"I know the 57th expedition was a failure, but every other expedition was the same as this one, minus the unknown Titan-shifter coming to 'save' the day," the raven rasped, "I just don't feel the need to eat anymore, and I've been getting limited amount of sleep because of all these bullshit meetings I have to attend to,"

He looked back over his shoulder at Erwin, only to be caught in his gaze.

"Erwin... why do you care? I've known you for a long time now, but does that really give you an excuse to try to comfort me? It's like you said before, you didn't think that I'd need the comfort,"

"Everyone needs to romance their ego every now and then, but that's something I know you'd never do," Erwin continued, "but answer me this truthfully... are you blaming yourself for their deaths?"

This took Levi by minor surprise. Did he really blame himself for the lament outcome of the expedition? He looked back down at his lap and allowed his eyes to droop sadly.

"I guess you could say that, if you really wanted to. If I killed the bitch right then and there, all of those people wouldn't of died. But if I killed her, that would just mean another painful blow to humanity... she's a very valuable person that can possibly give us answers,"

"What's more important to you: Answers to your questions or the lives of your soldiers, and more importantly, your own?" Erwin asked quietly.

"I'm not unsure, not quite certain, though," the raven sneered painfully.

Erwin didn't expect such a shady response, but naturally respected it. They stood motionless for a rather drawn out minute, until Levi shivered softly. A small sigh left his lips as he shivered, earning a concerned look from Erwin. The blonde's hands trailed down from his shoulders to his stomach, closing the gap between them and embracing him with fervent arms. Levi's eyes widened as Erwin wrapped his arms around him; Why the hell was this happening?

"You don't have to," Levi muttered, gripping onto the blonde's wrists to signal his removal.

"You deserve the comfort," Erwin retorted, tightening the embrace.

Levi's eyes widened at his response. He didn't think Erwin actually cared for his emotions like this. What was more is that he's actually _hugging _the raven. It's a totally mental thought, and Levi started to question whether it was a dream or not. He felt a sudden warmth on the top of his head as Erwin softly nuzzled into his his hair. The grip he had on Erwin's wrist tightened.

"Erwin...?"

"Happy birthday, Levi,"

The raven looked back at the clock and saw that it was 12:00. His heart skipped a beat or two, but it was partially because of Erwin whispering that into his ear. The grip he had on Erwin's wrist loosened, and instead of removing his hands completely from him, he held onto the blonde's forearms. This made Erwin's smile widen as he nuzzled further into the raven's hair.

"Make a wish. It's Christmas; It might just come true," Erwin breathed.

"A wish?" Levi laughed softly. "If I really had to make one, I'd wish for you to do this more often,"

"Why is that? I thought you hated me,"

"I thought you said I needed the comfort, and now that I look at it, I sure as hell do," Levi said with a slight rasp in his voice.

"I didn't think I'd ever hear those kind of words leave your mouth. I'll see to that wish personally," Erwin said as he gave a warm smile and planted a quick kiss behind Levi's ear.

Levi blushed softly as he felt Erwin's lips touch his skin once more. His grip tightened around Erwin's forearms, earning another soft chuckle. Another kiss was planted, yet this time it was on his head, and slightly lazier than the last. The raven's head started to droop as his eyes closed. He hardly had enough sleep the previous night, and hell, was he tired.

This was the first time he was actually happy that it was his birthday.

**o0o0o0o**

The hallways of the castle were all aligned with rows of mistletoe, roses, and lights that twinkled brightly. Almost every hallway contained some sort of decoration, and the dining hall was amongst all of them. The Christmas trees in the dining hall were covered top to bottom with glistening lights, ornaments, and bushels of mistletoe. Nearly all of the soldiers that had taken refuge in the castle were in the high of their Christmas Spirit; The sounds of chattering and laughter was heard very early in the morning, but that didn't matter to anyone.

Most were already in the dining hall exchanging gifts and getting their breakfast. Living in the castle meant training, duty, and cleaning (thanks to Levi), and Christmas promised a day of rest to most. Despite it being a holiday, people still had to attend to duty. It was somewhat depressing, having to stand guard outside the castle while the others enjoyed their time, and amongst the soldiers who had to attend to duty was Jean and Armin.

Although Jean didn't show up to duty, Armin was still obedient to the Commander and his wishes. Though he really wanted to spend his Christmas in the warmth of the castle, he ignored the urge to leave his post behind and join his friends in the dining hall. He brought his book, as usual, and leaned on the cold wall to start his somewhat comfortable read. As he opened the book to a folded page, he heard footsteps echoing in the hallway behind him.

He turned to greet whoever was coming towards him, but he couldn't deny that he was slightly panicking on the inside about Jean not being there with him. If it was the Commander, he'd be in trouble. His heart slightly clenched in both relief and excitement as he saw that instead of Commander Erwin coming to meet him, it was Eren. Armin couldn't deny that he was actually excited to see his boyfriend again, but some part of him wanted to know why he was there.

"Eren?" the blonde asked as Eren greeted him with a warm hug.

"So that horse-faced bastard didn't show up, hm?" Eren laughed as he released Armin from the embrace. "I'm not surprised, no one showed up for duty today. Everyone's going around the castle with their friends and lovers, spending their sweet ass time admiring the decorations that we slaved away to put up,"

"That's where you've been this whole time? Putting up decorations?" Armin snickered, earning an annoyed glare from the brunette.

"You've had it easy; Attending meetings would be much better than cleaning your superior's desk about twenty times a day,"

This only made Armin's snicker turn into an actual laugh. As he burst out laughing, Eren playfully flicked him on the head, earning a surprised 'ouch' from the other. Armin refolded the page he was on and closed the book, tucking it away safely under his arm. The brunette grinned as he pulled Armin back into another hug, but this time his hold was tighter.

"Why don't we go get breakfast? Or head back to our dorm?" Eren murmured into Armin's hair.

"But I'm on duty right now," the blonde protested as he looked up at Eren. "Won't I get in tr -"

His question was interrupted by a soft kiss. The sudden contact on his slightly chapped lips sent a perturbed shiver down his spine; Or was that just the cold weather kicking in? Armin reached up to wrap his arms around Eren's neck, the book under his arm dropping to the cold floor with a soft thud. Eren took this chance to hold the blonde's hips, a sudden growth of warmth coming from his boyfriend's face in the process. He grinned softly into the kiss; It was way too easy to make Armin blush like that.

Armin's blush only intensified as he felt the brunette's tongue drag across his lips. He broke from the kiss momentarily to complain, but as he opened his mouth to do so, he felt Eren's tongue slip into his mouth. He didn't bother opening his eyes to continue his weak protest; Letting out a soft moan, he suckled on the appendage that had invaded his cavern. However, he stopped after a couple of small sucks; He finally remembered where they were. Armin broke away from the kiss, grinning softly as the brunette licked off the thin line of saliva that connected from their mouths.

"Eren, we can't make out in public like this," Armin muttered in embarrassment.

He let out a frustrated groan as the brunette chuckled softly.

"Don't be so paranoid, everyone is inside the castle right now. No one's attending duty at the moment, so -" Eren leaned in and playfully pecked at Armin's lips, "- it wouldn't kill you enjoy yourself for once,"

Armin bit his lip and said, "Not here... someone will see us,"

"Let them watch,"

Eren recaptured the blonde's lips with his own with a slight grin on his face. Armin was still a bit uncomfortable with the fact that someone could walk in on them at any moment, or worse, the Commander. The blonde let out a soft moan as Eren bit down gingerly on his bottom lip and sucked, pulling softly before letting go. He repeated this process again, until he heard a cough behind them. Armin could of sworn that his heart stopped at that moment; They broke apart immediately to see who walked in on them.

"Did we interrupt you lovebirds?"

They saw both Reiner and Bertolt staring idly at them. Reiner wore a rather devious grin on his face, while Bertolt was trying to look at anything but the two. Armin squeaked softly in both discomfort and embarrassment; He still remembered when he eavesdropped on them doing very _intimate _things, and what's more is that they actually walked in on them kissing. The blonde felt as if he was going to die of embarrassment, picking up the book that he dropped earlier and returning to Eren's side. He was staring at his feet until he felt something wrap around his waist. To his greatest embarrassment, he was pulled closer towards Eren, earning an amused look from Reiner.

"Yes, I'm afraid you did. What are you here for, anyways? I thought you two would be eating breakfast with everyone else," Eren said, grinning as he felt Armin try to pull away from his side in embarrassment.

"We were one of the early birds who ate breakfast first. It's been awhile since I've seen the mess hall packed like that," Reiner continued, "You two didn't eat breakfast yet, huh? We didn't see you. If you want, we can take over here while you go eat,"

Eren's eyebrows furrowed in confusion. "Why the sudden change in mood, Reiner? Usually you'd smack us for messing around,"

"I think the Christmas spirit is starting to kick him," Bertolt stated quietly.

Reiner's expression still didn't change; He walked up to Eren and held out a hand. A warm smile found its way onto Eren's lips as he gave the blonde a high five instead of the handshake that was expected of him.

"I'll take it from here," the taller blonde said as he took his hand back and beckoned for Bertolt to come nearer.

"I knew I could count on you," Eren laughed playfully, pulling Armin along with him towards the dining hall.

They watched as Eren and Armin turned the corner, laughing to themselves as they heard the smaller blonde squeak in protest. Bertolt sat down on the cold floor and brought his knees up to his chin, wrapping his arms around his shins as he buried his face into his knees. He usually used this pose if he was uncomfortable or bored, but Reiner ignored it anyways. Instead of sitting next to Bertolt, the blonde leaned back on the cold wall and folded his hands together. He tucked his hands away under his arms to keep warm, looking off into the distance and admiring the view of the sun barely rising over the crowns of trees.

"Reiner?"

Reiner looked back at the taller male and got caught in his gaze. He gave a small nod, signaling Bertolt to go on.

"Why are we here? I thought Annie would be -"

"- Not now, Bertl. You don't know who's here and who isn't," Reiner murmured. "She said she'd be coming here, and if she bumped into Eren, shit would of gotten ugly,"

Bertolt shook his head in confusion and buried himself into his knees once more. The blonde let out a tired sigh and went back to admiring the image in front of him. All was silent (excluding the sound of wind and the rustle of trees) until someone let out an irritated 'tch' behind them.

Reiner looked over his shoulder and started, "Annie, where have -"

He stopped dead in the middle of his sentence, causing Bertolt to look up from his knees to see what happened. Looking around, he opened his mouth to question Reiner, but closed it immediately. It wasn't Annie standing right behind them.

"Hmph, I guess it was a good idea not to bring Krista with me today. How are you, Reiner? Long time no see,"


	15. XV: Misleading View

**Note: **Yes, due to the power of fanfiction, Ymir actually keeps her memory, and I express it in the beginning of this chapter quite well. I already told you before, manga spoilers coming your way, but you'd only know that if you actually read the chapter warnings. *sigh* Oh, life, stop it. Don't come complaining to me about 'I haven't read the manga yet!' or 'you ruined the manga for me!' because I really won't care... okay, maybe I will... yes I'll probably cry in a corner for an hour or two ;-; Still, I do give a fair warning in the beginning of every chapter so... yeah. Manga spoilers. They're not **huge** spoilers, but it's still something.

The only chapter warnings I have is that it contains minor language. I added a bit of a drunken Levi, as promised, and really... I had quite the laugh after writing him in here. It's just another thing that'll make Eren think a bit different about his childhood heroes. Hanji is quite 'normal' for this chapter, though... not as energetic as I wanted her to be, but oh well. Minor smut coming your way, too, so... don't die on me now.

And the foreshadowing..._ the foreshadowing_ like damn did I make shit way too obvious. Ugh T_T I don't want to rewrite it anymore.

* * *

_**XV: Misleading View**_

"What, am I not welcomed? Quit staring at me like that. You've grown to be quite the soldier,"

"I'm not a small child, _Ymir_," Reiner spat bitterly. "Don't treat me as if you're my elder,"

"Well, I technically am," Ymir said as a demonic grin spread across her lips. "I knew you two were up to something around here. Now, who's the new Titan-shifter? I didn't think I'd see another one in my lifetime besides Eren,"

"We're not quite sure ourselves. What're you doing out here on such a cold day? I thought you'd be with Krista back with the other soldiers, or in your dorm room. How is Krista, anyways?"

"Krista's doing fine," she replied. "What's more important is why you're out here,"

"We're on duty," Bertolt cut in.

They both stared at the brunette, causing him to blush softly in embarrassment. It was unlikely for him to speak up like that, and Reiner certainly hoped that Ymir wouldn't catch that he was leading a lie. To his relief, Ymir let out a laugh and walked to Bertolt, crouching down to meet his face.

"It's been a long time since we've talked, Bertl. Did you miss me?"

Bertolt smiled weakly. "The last time we talked was during the expedition, it wasn't too long ago,"

"It felt like forever," Ymir whined, finally standing up to meet Reiner again. "Did you eat breakfast, at least?"

Reiner rolled his eyes and said, "Don't talk like you care, we know you too well for that. To answer your question, though, we were supposed to attend to duty today, so here we are,"

"That actually kind of hurt," she pouted.

"That's good to know,"

They stood motionless for a second before she added, "What was this about Annie, anyways? Didn't she go to the Military Force?"

Bertolt bit his lip and hid his face in embarrassment. There was no way out of this one, not with Ymir. They've all known each other from the start of their training (though Reiner and Bertolt's history goes further back), and Ymir's been known to pursue her question until it was finally answered. He silently prayed that Reiner had an excuse for this one; He didn't want anything to start up right now.

"She was supposed to come and escort Eren to Stohess. Apparently they're planning on questioning him there, but that's just a rumor,"

"Out of all districts, why is it Stohess?"

Reiner bit his lip in confusion, earning a devilish laugh from the woman. She walked closer to him, up to the point where they would have been face to face if there wasn't a gap in height. It was slightly embarrassing, looking up at Reiner like that, but she brushed it off her shoulder.

"Have I ever told you that everyone has their own little title? One that fits perfectly with the personality?" Ymir asked with a dangerous tone. "There's Eren, who's ignorant, me, who's a thief, and Bertolt, who's a murderer,"

Reiner growled in anger and gripped the collar of Ymir's shirt. He took the collar in his fist and lifted her up with ease; As much as this amused Ymir, she still couldn't deny that it was harder to breathe. To support her weight, she gripped the blonde's wrist with a surprising amount of strength, as if she was threatening to break his wrist.

"Not so scary now, are you?" he rasped into Ymir's face, tickling her skin with his breath.

"What are you, hmm? I know – you're lost. A small child, crying for his parents in vain. Or are you crying for that one shit... what's his name, Berwick?"

His grip on her collar strengthened, soon denying her permission to breathe. She coughed in a struggle to catch her breath, resulting in a cry of protest from Bertolt.

"Reiner, stop it! You'll kill her like that!"

This took Reiner by full surprise; He looked over to Bertolt and saw that his eyes were widened by both surprise and fury. Did he really disapprove that much? The blonde let out another irritated 'tch' and let go of Ymir, granting her the freedom to breathe. She let go of his wrist and made for her neck instead, massaging softly as she panted for air.

"How do you know about him?" Reiner asked with a dangerous tone in his voice.

"... We go back a _long _way, Reiner," She rasped.

They glared at each other for a couple of seconds before she sidestepped him and walked back into the corridor. She left him completely bewildered, mainly because she actually knew about his deceased friend. Reiner didn't remember telling her about him...

"Reiner," Ymir called.

There was a small pause, signaling that she could go on.

"Don't worry so much about him. You two will break bread together... _very_ soon,"

**o0o0o0o**

Heavy breathing rang throughout the room, accompanied by the small squeaking of a bed. Armin moaned softly as he felt teeth sink into his neck, hard enough to leave a small bruise there. Eren's hands skillfully made their way up his shirt, ignoring the need to unbutton the shirt and pull it right off him. Their lips met once more, moving on their own accord, hands grabbing and caressing every here and there. They were back in their dorm, yet this time they made sure the door was locked before doing anything 'intimate.'

One of Eren's hands caressed the blonde's chest gently while the other tugged playfully at his pants. Small sucking noises issued from the two as their tongues fought for dominance, erotic moans occasionally leaving Armin's lips. Armin reluctantly broke away from the kiss with the need to breathe, panting heavily and weaving his hands through Eren's hair. In the corner of his eye, he saw that the clock had already struck 8:30 (AM), and a small shiver of panic ran through his spine. As much as he wanted to continue kissing Eren and feeling the gentle caresses over his body, he still needed to attend a meeting.

He untangled his hands from Eren's hair and whispered, "I'm sorry, I need to go to a meeting in ten minutes,"

"Ten minutes is more than enough time," Eren chuckled as he sensually licked at his lover's lips.

"W- What do you ...?!"

The blonde's sentence was interrupted as Eren's appendage slipped into his mouth. Both tongues intertwined together, the blush on their faces intensifying greatly. Armin whined in protest, his hands finding their way back into the brunette's hair and tugging to signal him to stop. What he didn't know was that hair pulling was another turn on for Eren, and it only encouraged him further. The brunette skillfully unbuttoned Armin's pants and pulled them down to his thighs, earning another whine of protest. They broke from the kiss, their breathing now heavy and somewhat uneven.

"W- Wait! I don't – what are -?"

"You're not uncomfortable, are you?" Eren asked, immediately stopping his movement.

"N- No, but... I'll be late...!" The blonde whined softly.

"Then let's make this quick,"

Eren groped his lover's crotch, a small moan leaving the blonde's lips as he did so. He continued to squeeze playfully as he nibbled softly on Armin's collar bone, leaving small love bites every here and there.

"T- They'll see the marks..."

The brunette grinned softly and licked the length of his collar bone. "Knowing you, you'll find some way to hide it. Then again... it would be so much better if someone saw these marks on you,"

Armin's grip on Eren's hair strengthened as he felt the brunette's hand slip into his boxers. He gripped Armin's erection and fondled it softly, though the fabric was denying him the ability to move freely. Pulling the boxers down, he saw that the blonde's cock was already fully erect. Eren teasingly dragged a finger up the underside of his cock, his own member slightly twitching as he heard Armin's sweet cry of pleasure. Looking up at his lover, he saw that Armin was watching him, eyes were half lidded and his mouth slightly opened, panting softly with arousal.

"Eren, stop... if you do that, I'll..."

"That's the point," Eren grinned.

The face Armin was wearing was _very _erotic; It made Eren's own member throb softly with arousal. He gave a devious smirk and skillfully ran his fingers over Armin's cock, lightly stroking and swiping his thumb over the sensitive tip. Pre-come smeared over the pad of his thumb as he repeated the process, yet it was still painfully slow. Despite the protests he made earlier, Armin bucked his hips impatiently, silently begging for more. This made Eren chuckle softly under his breath.

"Just a minute ago you were complaining about how you wanted to leave," Eren teased, taking his hand away from Armin and enjoying the whine he got from the loss.

"We're already here... so..." the blonde muttered as he turned his head away in embarrassment.

"Would you moan my name?" Eren asked with a slight purr issuing in his voice, wrapping his hand around his lover's member once more.

"D- Don't ask such... embarrassing t- things..." Armin squeaked.

"I'll take that as a yes,"

Eren started to slowly pump his member, enjoying the small gasps and moans issuing from his lips. Over time, his pumps gradually got harder and faster, the moans coming from his lover's mouth getting louder as each second dragged by. Armin started to lightly tug on the brunette's hair, softly calling out his name between sweet moans and bucking his hips to meet his movements. As pre-come started to leak from his manhood, Eren stopped his vigorous pumps and teasingly rolled the blonde's balls with his fingers, slightly pinching and pulling on the skin with his other hand in the process.

It wasn't enough to guide him to completion, but it was enough to keep him just on the edge. Armin let out a pleading moan and tugged much harder Eren's hair, earning a soft groan of both arousal and approval.

"You're going to have to beg," Eren purred.

"B- but Eren -"

His whine was interrupted with an excited moan as Eren squeezed his balls tightly. He felt himself on the brink of climaxing, and he just needed to finish now. What's more is that he was probably late to that meeting, which was the only thing that bothered him at that moment.

"Eren," the blonde called, "Eren!"

As soon as the brunette's name rolled off his tongue, he captured Armin's lips for his own, muffling the excited moans that leaked out of the back of his throat. Eren stroked the blonde's manhood vigorously, smoothly guiding him to completion. Armin broke away from the kiss and moaned loudly in pleasure, bucking his hips as his seed streaked out of his arousal. It coated the palm of Eren's hand, leaking between his fingers in the process. The blonde bit his lip in embarrassment as he calmed down from the high of his climax.

"I- I'm so sorry..." Armin apologized frantically. "Let me get something to clean it off with..."

Eren ignored him brought his soiled hand up to his face and licked the come off of it. This only made Armin's eyes widen in shock; Just what the hell does he think he's doing? He watched as Eren licked the bodily fluids off his own hand, studying his foreign actions through clouded eyes.

"You... really didn't have to,"

"But I wanted to," Eren said with a devious smirk on his face. "Anyways, don't you have a meeting to attend to?"

He looked back at the clock behind him.

"It's already forty past eight, and I highly doubt you'll get there in less than five minutes. But... it's better to show up late than never, right?"

"Don't pass this on as if nothing happened," the blonde clicked his tongue impatiently. "Are you sure you even -"

His sentence was interrupted by a moist kiss. Armin could taste something bitter on Eren's lips; It didn't disgust him, but surprised him. He broke away from the kiss with a frustrated squeak, pulling down his shirt and adjusting his uniform.

"You're really cute, you know that?" Eren complimented as he helped the blonde by buttoning his pants and zipping them back up. "Especially when you blush like that,"

"Damn it, Eren... there's marks on my neck now... I swear I'm going to die," Armin complained as he readjusted his dress shirt and jacket. "What about you, anyways? Shouldn't I...?"

"Don't worry about. You need to go to a meeting right now, and either way, I'll still have to go to Heichou's office later on today and see what will happen with that hearing that they've been talking about,"

Armin nodded slowly and turned away from the brunette. He felt guilty, not being able to do anything, and what was worse was that he easily broke down like that in front of Eren. Even if it was his boyfriend, it was still quite embarrassing. He felt something soft press against his cheek, causing him to let out a soft murmur of approval and turn back towards his lover. He greeted Eren with a soft peck to the lips before climbing off his bed.

"I don't know what I'll do with you..." Armin muttered softly.

"Maybe you'll let me cuddle with you without worrying about waking up early the next day for duty or for a meeting?"

The blonde smiled and said, "Don't make me feel worse, you ass,"

"Love you too," Eren replied cheekily.

**o0o0o0o**

After the meeting was over, Armin was immediately excused from the office. Although it was rather short, he couldn't deny that he was still as bored as hell in there. Usually he'd be pushed back into silence by the other strategists there, considering the fact that he was only seventeen, not quite the adult yet. They underestimate him, but that didn't bother him at all. He thought of his ideas faulty anyways, so it doesn't really matter. The blonde was one of the first to leave the office since the others stayed behind to gather papers or to talk to Commander Pixis, who rarely ever visits the castle.

Despite the weather being stone cold and harsh, he still managed to keep warm with a thin coat and his uniform. A small shiver ran down his spine as he walked towards the dining hall, in search of his lover. He was actually _very _excited to see Eren; The present he got him was left forgotten earlier (due to the rare time they get alone with nothing to interrupt them), but now he was just itching to hand it to him. Since it's already been awhile since they've taken refuge in one of the old Survey Corps bases, he already knew his way through the castle, and immediately took the shortest route to the dining hall.

As he turned the corner into the next hallway, he saw someone leaning against one of the stone pillars that had been covered in the morning's frost. That person could easily catch a cold doing that; Armin opened his mouth to call out to whoever was there, but instantly closed it once he saw that the soldier happened to be Jean. Instead of rushing to him, he slowed down his pace, slightly curious to see what Jean could be doing at this location. Out of all the places in the castle, why was he hiding here, alone and away from the other soldiers? He was careful not to let his footsteps echo through the hall, but at the same time he felt terrible for sneaking up on Jean like this.

It only took the next couple of footsteps to see that Jean was holding a rose in his hand. The rose was a pale shade of gray, the tips of its petals slightly wilted due to the weather and partially because of the lack of water. He saw that Jean was twirling it in his hand, one or two petals falling off the rose and gliding through the air with the cool breeze every now and then. Jean didn't have an expression on his face; It was blank, almost as if he was standing dead on the spot. Was he thinking of Marco? Armin immediately stopped in his tracks and hesitated. It would be rude, disturbing him at a time like this. He turned on his heel to make a quiet escape, but the sudden movement was caught in the corner of Jean's eye.

Jean jerked his head towards the movement and saw that it was Armin. A soft smile spread across his lips as he saw the blonde look back at him and let out a soft squeak of surprise. He took one last look at the rose before partially tucking it into his sleeve and left the pillar. Armin let out an awkward laugh and blushed in embarrassment.

"I'm sorry about that... I didn't mean to disturb you. I was just on my way to the mess hall to hang out with everyone else, and I kinda ran into you," the blonde muttered.

"You don't have to go to the extent of apologizing to me, you know. It's actually quite nice, having a visitor at a time like this," Jean replied with a warm smile. "You shouldn't be so surprised either, anyone could of seen you, the way you tried to run for it,"

Armin bit his lip. "It was unwise of me, but I panicked. Why are you here, anyways? I thought you'd be with everyone else eating breakfast or just hanging out. Why... are you alone?"

"I just thought I needed the time alone," said Jean. "Why are you wearing your uniform so early on a holiday?"

"I had to attend a meeting earlier; There's no way I could show up in my casual clothing to something like that. Also... What's the reason for you wanting to be alone, if I may ask?"

Jean hesitated for a moment. Sure he trusted Armin, but he couldn't talk to him about Marco without breaking down into pieces. He slipped the rose back out of his sleeve and held it between his thumb and index finger, bringing it up to Armin's nose for him to sniff. Armin hesitated for a moment before sniffing the rose, the soft fragrance easing his troubled mind. It was quite foreign, but the smell could actually calm someone down. That fact alone fascinated him.

"Don't worry about it," he smiled.

The taller male took Armin's hand in his and brought it up to the stem of the rose, wrapping his hand around it. Armin blushed softly as he gripped the rose, with Jean's hand on his, the slightly warm feeling oddly reminding him of Eren. He cursed himself highly for it; There's no possible way that Jean can compare to Eren. It's almost impossible to think that. The blonde didn't even notice that he continued to sniff the rose, the soothing smell running throughout his nose and brain. How did Jean manage to find such a fine flower within these walls?

"It's nice, isn't it? They usually grow at this time of year, regardless the harsh weather. They're really interesting flowers... they used to be Marco's favorite,"

Armin's blush intensified as Jean's other hand wrapped around his. He meant to pull away from his grip, but instead, he managed to pull Jean closer to him. The sudden pull made the taller male stumble, and to avoid falling over completely, he wrapped an arm around Armin. The blonde's face snuggled comfortably against his chest, and they were still holding the same rose together. He couldn't believe himself for being in such a position with someone other than Eren, but he couldn't deny that he was starting to enjoy the warmth.

They stayed like this for one drawn out out moment before Armin shook the taller male's hand off his and pulled away from him, dropping the rose in the process. The blonde let out a soft hiss of disapproval as he saw the rose hit the ground, most of its petals falling off of it right afterward. The breeze claimed the petals for its own, brushing them off deeper into the castle. Armin cursed himself highly for it; It must have been so disrespectful doing that to Jean, but what was more was that he actually let someone else hold him like that. It wasn't clear until now that Jean actually had some type of feelings towards him, and that fact alone started to bother him.

"I'm sorry about that, Jean... I'll find you another one," Armin apologized. "I didn't know that it was Marco's favorite flower until now, either. It's really nice... I can see why he liked them so much,"

"You don't have to apologize, it's fine. Do you like the rose, too?"

The blonde hesitated for a moment. "I won't deny that it's really soothing... but, Jean... you didn't have to do that..."

"I wanted to. I'm sorry if it made you uncomfortable," Jean muttered, the blush on his face only darkening further with embarrassment.

They stood in an awkward silence for a minute or two. They didn't bother moving or talking any further; Instead, they tried to avoid eye contact, looking at anything but the other during that awkward silence. Jean decided to take his chances and try to make eye contact with the blonde; Instead, he saw something on his collarbone that sparked his interest.

"Armin... what's that?" he asked, pointing at the blonde's neck and collarbone.

Armin could of sworn that his heart stopped as soon as he heard that. His hands immediately made their way to the collar of his dress shirt and readjusted it, frantically trying to hide the love bites that Eren left him with earlier. Why did Jean have to catch them, out of all people?

"It's nothing," the blonde murmured under his breath.

"It doesn't look like nothing," Jean grinned. "Were you looking for Eren earlier?"

"Should I say yes?" Armin asked quietly.

"If you are, I'm just going to let you know that he's not at the mess hall. I bumped into him on my way here, apparently he was going to visit Heichou's office,"

"You two bumped into each other and didn't start a fight? That's different,"

"Yes, it's weird... but it happened," Jean muttered coldly.

"You should go back to your dorm and warm up, it's not healthy to stay out here at a time like this. The weather's horrible; If you stay here, you'll catch a terrible cold,"

"Says the one that was wandering through the corridors by themselves," Jean teased. "Anyways... I'll talk to you later, okay? Tell Eren I say 'hi' while you're there,"

It was different, getting such a request from Jean, but he accepted it anyways. They parted from each other, the atmosphere that was once warm now back to its usual stone cold feeling. Armin turned at a different hallway that lead to Levi's office, but he was debating whether to drop it or not since they could be in the middle of a meeting. He couldn't think over what happened with Jean without finding himself blushing softly; It reminded him of the time he received a kiss on the cheek from the taller male, but that fact alone brought shame to him.

His heart belonged to Eren and none other.

**o0o0o0o**

Eren knocked on the Corporal's door lightly as he hesitantly gripped the doorknob. It wouldn't be the first time that he found Levi in a rather sour mood, and that thought alone is enough to threaten anyone with. He heard muffled laughter through the door as someone approached him. He let go of the doorknob immediately as the door swung open, revealing a rather giggly Hanji. Her eyes enlightened at the sight of him.

"Eren? What would you need so early on a day like this?" she asked.

"I was told that there was a meeting in Heichou's office today. Is everything all right...?"

Hanji looked over her shoulder and grinned before facing the brunette once more. "I'm pretty sure that your visit here will be anything but productive. You see, Levi and Erwin just happened to celebrate Christmas rather early in the morning this year,"

She pushed the door fully open and stepped aside, pointing her thumb towards the Corporal and Commander. Eren tried his hardest to hold down a laugh; He saw that Erwin was knocked out in a chair next to the office window and Levi was seated upon his own desk, lightly swaying with his eyes barely staying open. Hanji grinned as she saw the look on Eren's face.

"Sorry for ruining your unicorn and sparkle look on your childhood heroes. I was one of the reasons why this happened... you see, Levi never really celebrates his own birthday, so we kind of got him to relax for awhile,"

"You... got him drunk for his... birthday?" the brunette questioned.

"Christmas just happens to be Levi's birthday as well," Hanji laughed. "It's hard to believe, but it's true. I'm not even sure how old he is, myself. Erwin's the only living soul here that actually knows that kind of secret information. To think he wouldn't trust me..."

Hanji let out an irritated 'hmph' before continuing, "I came here a couple of minutes ago to check up on them, just to find that they're barely awake anyways. I don't think they caused so much damage, and thank god, too; Levi would of thrown a hissy fit if he found his desk in ruins. I thought I could take them back to their own rooms, but seriously, they're completely oblivious to everything around them. Or at least Erwin is, I can't get him to wake up even to save my own life,"

Eren grinned softly as he said, "Maybe I could help you? I'm already here, anyways,"

"If you really want to, you can," Hanji sighed in relief. "Make sure nothing happens to them... this really wouldn't look good, considering the position they're in right now. If you don't mind, I'm going to go eat breakfast. I spent way too much time this morning in my lab... it's mental to say that I'm actually getting tired, right?"

As Hanji said those last words, she sidestepped Eren and trotted off towards the dining hall. This left the brunette completely paralyzed; Now that he thought of it, how the hell would he handle this? He took a somewhat frightened look at Levi, wondering if he'd be able to help him off the desk without receiving a swift kick to the stomach. That thought alone made him chuckle softly under his breath. He shouldn't be so paranoid, but he just couldn't help it.

He walked into the room and lazily pushed the door behind him in an attempt to close it, but instead, it stopped only centimeters away from being fully closed. That didn't bother him, though; It won't kill him to leave the door open a bit. Even if someone saw his childhood heroes like this... for some foreign reason, he found that more funny that it was threatening. Some part of him secretly wished for that to happen. He bit his lip to muffle his laughter as he watched Levi yawn softly, his swaying slightly getting worse by the minute.

Levi heard his muffled snicker and snapped, "What the hell do you -" he was interrupted by a small hiccup, "- you want, brat?"

"N- Nothing, Heichou," Eren said, shoving the laughter away to create a more serious tone in his voice. "Wouldn't it be best if you get down from the desk, sir? You may break something,"

"Sitting on my ass won't kill anyone, you little shit,"

Eren was slightly taken aback by this retort.

He watched as Levi rubbed his eyes and lazily say, "Hey, brat... let me talk to you for a second,"

The brunette hesitated. "Heichou...?"

"Do you want me to kick a small animal?" he snapped again, causing Eren to rush over to his side.

"Something I can help you with?" the brunette asked hopefully.

He let out another small hiccup before asking, "Did... did she love me?"

Eren's eyes widened in surprise; Was Levi talking about Petra? He heard of Petra's fate, but he didn't think the Corporal would still be brewing on her death after such a long time. He didn't know whether to reply or not, mainly because he was unsure of what to say.

"You mean Petra, sir?" Eren asked.

"Yes, that bitch," the raven yawned once more.

The brunette bit his lip. "Sir... If she truly was a bitch, would she have loved you like she did before?"

As soon as he said this, Levi grabbed the collar of his shirt and forced the brunette closer to him. Eren flinched softly, expecting a sharp kick to come his way, but instead he earned a growl of displeasure from the raven.

"I don't care if she loved me... I don't even know what love is," Levi spat bitterly in the brunette's face. "Fuck... I'd give anything for some god damn coffee right now,"

"Do you want me to get you some, sir?" Eren asked with a slight panicked tone in his voice as he gripped his wrist to signal him to let go.

"Shove it up your ass," Levi snarled, tightening his grip on Eren's collar.

Eren's panic got the best of him; He frantically tried to pull away from Levi's grip, but that only caused him to be pulled closer to the raven's face. His breath was now tumbling over Eren's face; The brunette couldn't deny that he was actually scared at this point.

"S- Sir?!"

"Tell me, brat... what is love?" the raven asked with a rather calm voice, despite the position he was in. "Or do you even know what that bullshit is?"

The brunette's hands found their way on either side of Levi, grabbing onto the edge of the desk to support himself. Levi payed no attention to this at all, instead he stared at he struggling brunette with a slight glint in his eyes. The glint of curiosity that usually shone in Eren's eyes, considering the fact that he himself was a rather loud person.

"Love?" Eren hesitated for a moment. "Heichou – ah, love... is basically what you feel towards someone. It's the feeling you get deep inside your heart when you're with that person... you feel comfortable, relieved, happy... calm, even. Love is one of the things that contributes to your everyday emotion... if you're heartbroken, you're dejected, and possibly angry... if you're in love, you feel care free and possibly unimpeachable, given the way you're acting,"

"Why does love hurt?" Levi questioned innocently.

"It... it hurts...? Love can be... painful at times, sir. However... the pain is what builds your relationship. If two people love each other, then no matter what happens in the relationship that hurts them, they'll still try their hardest to stay together. Whether it's time or mistakes that wound you two, he or she will still love you no matter what. Love is the thing that determines whether you're truly precious to that one person or not,"

The raven's eyes narrowed dangerously. "How can you be too sure if he or she actually loves you?"

His words were slightly slurred at this point, but Eren could still make out a basic understanding of what he was trying to say.

Ignoring the hiccup that left the back of Levi's throat, he continued, "Well, one thing that someone would say... is... 'I love you',"

As soon as he said that, he felt something soft press against his lips. His eyes widened in both terror and confusion; Levi... is actually kissing him. Their lips stayed in contact, a perturbed shiver running down his spine as it happened. In reality, Levi's frigid lips were actually warm and tender, and that fact alone brought goosebumps on Eren's skin. He brought a hand up in panic to slap Levi's face away, but he stopped immediately; He couldn't slap the Corporal, he'd get his ass skinned alive. He stayed in the uncomfortable embrace, hesitating on whether he should pull away or not.

His eyes were still wide open, even after Levi pulled away from the kiss. It wasn't entirely Levi's fault for suddenly kissing him like that, was it? A blush of embarrassment crept onto Eren's cheeks as the raven let go of his shirt, finally granting him freedom. Eren felt as if he lost full control over his body; He simply stood there, his shirt severely ruffled and his face smoldering in a rather prepossessing shade of pink. A second or two passed by before he heard a creak behind him. His heart stopped immediately as he heard a sob.

Eren spun around towards the door; He completely forgot that he left the door partially open, but the thing only salient thing to him now was who was watching them. He took a step towards the door before he stopped dead on the spot. His eyes certainly did not defy him.

The door was immediately closed by whoever was watching them, a quick flash of dirty blonde hair flicking out of the way in the process.


	16. XVI: Mistakes

**Note: **About that ending... eh heh... you already know who it was, guys. Don't pick on me for having the urge to break the little shit this far into the fanfiction. Things will get better... soon enough...! (?) Also, when I was first writing that last chapter, I originally had Levi in his chair, but then I thought, "Why don't we have the bastard sitting on his desk? Things'll be funner that way!" So, there you have it. I also plan to humiliate him a little longer in this chapter... with a small mention of Eruri. Yes, I ship them, so I kinda kicked Riren to the curb, but there may be mentions of it later on if I really want to add it in there. Some Jearmin coming your way and minor language, too. I really wonder why I make Armin look somewhat 'innocent' in the Jearmin scene... sucks, doesnt it?

I've gotten little reviews, but with the ones I have now, I can't deny that I'm actually very happy about it [insert smiley face here]. They've inspired me a bit with one scene and the other, but most of my time right now is going to catching up on my reading. Inspiration's actually really hard to get if you think about it... or is that just me?

Mica Caldito's voice works wonders, doesn't it?

* * *

**_XVI: Mistakes_**

Armin found his way to the Corporal's office after a couple of minutes, bumping into Hanji on the way there. After frantically muttering his apologies, they separated, and he finally made it to Levi's office. He couldn't deny the slight fear he had as he wondered if they were actually in a meeting or not, since it was too quiet for such a thing. The blonde reached for the door knob and stopped as he noticed that the door was slightly opened. A soft surge of curiosity prickled at the base of his stomach; He could only hear one voice in the office, and it sounded like Eren.

His words were muffled by the door, but Armin hesitated, his hand still outstretched towards the door knob. Would it be wise to eavesdrop right now? Either way, he was already there... he couldn't exactly look back at a time like this. Cursing his fatuous curiosity, he withdrew his hand and leaned towards the door instead. As he looked through the small crack with only one eye, he saw Levi seated upon his desk with a dazed look on his face, and Eren just below him with his hand on each side of the raven. Armin bit his lip; What was Eren doing...?

The blonde strained his ears to hear what Eren was saying to Levi.

"... _I love you,_"

Armin's eyes widened as he watched Levi pull the brunette into a kiss. He felt himself start to shiver while tears welled up in the corners of his eyes. His vision was slightly blurry, the thick tears building up to the point of breaking. The blonde's lower lip trembled; Why was Eren kissing another person besides him? He watched as Eren finally pulled away from the kiss, a blush now smoldering against his cheeks.

That completely broke him.

He accidentally let out a soft sob as the tears finally broke free from its prison and streamed down his face. Eren heard this sob, and immediately spun around to see who it was. Armin's reactions was too slow now; He could have sworn that Eren already saw him, but that didn't really matter to him now. The blonde's hands immediately reached for the knob and forced the door shut, slightly jerking his head to get his hair out of the way. Nothing mattered to him anymore; Whether someone saw him breaking into pieces or heard his sobs, nothing mattered anymore.

With another painful intake of breath, he pushed himself away from the door and bolted from the scene, ignoring Eren's muffled yell (_"Armin, wait!"_). His face felt as if it were on fire despite the cold weather while his tears leaked from his eyes. Armin didn't know where to run anymore; He wasn't paying attention to where he was going at all, but that didn't concern him now. As long as it was away from Eren and Levi, anywhere would be perfect at this time. Over time, he felt his legs start to throb almost painfully from fatigue, but he didn't pay attention to it all.

_'Don't bother chasing after me... I want to be alone... it hurts so much. It really hurts. Is that of no concern to you?'_

As fatigue grew over him, he came to a stop at the corner of an empty hallway and allowed himself to slump against the cold wall. Looking back down the corridor, he didn't see anyone behind him, nor did he hear anything; Even if he wasn't in the comfort of his own dorm, it seemed like an okay place to pull some of the grief out of his heart with the help of his tears. That statement alone made him feel weak on the inside, but he already thought of himself as useless and weak. What more is there to do at a time like this?

_'Eren, what we did before... we'd cuddle, spend our free time together, kiss, anything a happy couple would do... are you trying to tell me that those things mean nothing to you?'_

It wasn't unlike him to cry, especially in front of people, mainly because he's done it many times before. Yet the times he cried in front of his comrades were because of death, not because of his boyfriend. He pressed himself against the wall, slowly sliding down to his knees as he let out sob after painful sob. He was being loud, but not loud enough for his noises to actually echo, which comforted him even more. Armin laid against the wall, using only his knees to support himself, gripping onto the collar of his jacket for comfort. It was actually very unlike him to break down like this, but this situation was different from any other.

_'Why? All I want to know is why... what made you do this? Did I drive you away somehow? You seemed so happy with me... was that all just a lie?'_

Thick tears fell from his eyes and splashed onto his front. Every other time he cried, he brushed it off his shoulder almost immediately and tried to turn the page. However, this time... he couldn't stop himself. He's never had his heart broken by someone before, and he certainly hated the feeling. The feeling of grief clawing at your aching heart... the feeling of being broken to pieces. He truly loved Eren... but did the brunette not see that? Armin sniffled softly as he shifted his position; He was now sitting on his rear, bringing his knees up to his chest and burying his face within his knees to hide himself from the cruelty of this world. If anyone were to catch him, he'd have a chance to at least wipe the tears away.

As he let out a rather high pitched sob, he heard a voice speak above him.

"Armin?"

_'God, kill me now,'_

Armin thought that the person who called his name was Eren, and the thought immediately pushed him from his limit. He lifted his face from his knees and cried, "What the hell do you want now?!"

His eyes widened as he saw the blurred figure of Jean towering over him. The blonde immediately felt his heart clench in remorse for yelling at him like that, and he buried his face into his knees again to avoid the confused look Jean wore on his face.

"I- I'm sorry... I thought you w- were someone else," Armin shuddered.

"Armin, why are you crying like that?"

The blonde clenched his eyes shut as a whimper escaped the back of his throat. It pained Jean to see Armin like this, but he couldn't move his gaze onto anything else. When he didn't gain an answer from the blonde, he came to his knees by Armin's side to comfort him. Armin sniffled furiously and lifted his head towards the taller male again, only to see a sympathetic look on his face.

"Armin," Jean repeated.

"Stop it, Jean... I don't want to talk right now..." the blonde sniffled.

"I don't care if you don't want to talk right now. It hurts to see a close friend breaking down into pieces like this, and what more can I do but try to comfort you? Isn't that what you did for me before?"

As Jean neared Armin, he pushed his back against the cold wall and turned his face away in embarrassment. It was hard, trying to contain his tears and further, and what was even more embarrassing was that small whimpers kept unintentionally leaving his throat. He couldn't hide his face from Jean any longer, and that fact alone made it harder to stop crying. The tears simply refused to stay in their place.

"You can talk to me, y'know. It's okay to cry... it's not a crime,"

"... It's h- hard to stop with the g- given circumstance..." he squeaked.

Jean reached out to Armin's face and gripped his chin, gently coaxing the blonde to fully face him. Despite the blush and tears masking his face, he couldn't deny that he still looked just as beautiful. Should he be cursing himself for having such a thought towards his 'close friend'? The blush on Armin's face only intensified as Jean's hand left his chin and glided over his face, immediately swiping the tears away.

"Jean...?"

"Why are you crying?" the taller male absentmindedly asked as he wiped the tears away, "Someone as beautiful as you shouldn't be hidden behind a curtain of tears,"

"I- I'm not beautiful," Armin muttered coldly, sniffling softly and blinking furiously as even more tears welled up in his eyes.

"What makes you think that?"

Armin's eyes sunk even deeper into their sockets as he rested his head on his knees. The hold he had around his shins tightened in both embarrassment and in a weak attempt to keep warm. Jean slightly frowned at this gesture and placed his hands upon the blonde's knees, forcing them apart and away from his face. Armin whined in disapproval and shuddered softly as a sudden shiver ran down his spine.

"Tell me why you're like this," Jean nudged on as he sat himself between Armin's legs, earning a surprised squeak.

"W- What're you doing...?!" the blonde complained.

"I'm not letting you go until you tell me," the taller male continued, "If I just left you here, something might happen to you. I don't want you doing anything rash, and isn't it warm now, with me here with you?"

Armin reluctantly nodded his head and said, "You know me so well, to where you'd know that I'd do something rash? My compliments to you,"

"I care about you, Armin," said Jean with a soft smile on his lips. "You can trust me,"

Armin hesitated for a moment; Was Jean really someone he can trust? If he trusted Eren with even his own life, would he really be willing to trust Jean up to the point where he'd allow himself to cry on his shoulder? The blonde certainly didn't want to bother him, but they were already there, and he was certainly convinced about his 'care'. Who would go this far to 'comfort' someone if they've constantly been refusing this whole time?

The blonde avoided eye contact as he muttered, "It's not that I don't trust you... It's just something that happened between Eren and I,"

"Did you two get in a fight?"

"... rather, it was something between Eren and Heichou,"

He looked up at the taller male with a slight blush of embarrassment, only to see him nodding in both sympathy and understanding. This only signaled him to continue, but he found it harder to contain his tears in the process.

"I kind of... heard Eren say his 'I love you' to H- Heichou and even saw him rob the b- bastard's lips -" Armin found himself starting to break into tears again, "- but what I really want to know is why he did that... he loves someone other than me, but w- why? What did I do w- wrong in this relationsh- ship? Jean, what the hell is so bad about me that made him do that?!"

The blonde was once again in tears as he practically shrieked the last few words of his sentence. Despite him being embarrassed as hell with the outcome, he still dipped his head and allowed himself to sob freely. It didn't matter anymore that Jean was there with him; If it truly pained him to see this, he would have left instead of stayed there with him. However, he couldn't deny that Jean gained some of his approval for doing so. He felt the taller male's hand on his chin again, the sudden warmth sending a shiver down his spine.

"Look at me -" Jean forced the blonde's chin up so they were finally making eye contact, "- I'm not sure why he did that to you, but you did absolutely nothing wrong -" he leaned in and planted a quick kiss to Armin's forehead, "- You're one of the very few people that managed to comfort me before, one of the very few people that actually 'cared' for me in one way or another -" he smiled softly as he saw Armin blush from the kiss, "- He really doesn't see how big of a mistake he made by kissing someone other than you; You're a great friend, Armin, and you did absolutely nothing wrong,"

Armin sniffled and rubbed his eyes slowly, clearing the tears away from his eyes since they denied him perfect vision. He looked back at Jean and allowed a smile to come across his lips.

"You're a different person, Jean," the blonde continued, "and there's nothing that could have comforted me at a time like this. You have my thanks,"

"It's fine," Jean smiled.

As a violent wind brushed by them, Armin gave a rather perturbed shiver, earning a concerned look from the taller male. Jean took advantage of his position and gently gripped Armin's shoulders. The blonde found himself being pulled onto Jean's lap, letting out a soft squeak of surprise in the process. He was basically straddling Jean at this point, and he could have sworn that Jean had let out a grunt of discomfort from the position. Armin gripped Jean's shoulders to support himself and looked him in the eye with a questioning look.

"It's really cold, isn't it?" Jean asked as he wrapped his arms around Armin and snuggled against his shoulder. "A hug really warms up the atmosphere, doesn't it?"

Armin hesitated for a moment before returning the embrace. "Y- Yes... it does..."

"You share a room with Eren, don't you?" Jean bit his lip before continuing, "If you want, you can stay at my dorm for awhile. It's really cold out, and I doubt that you'd want to see Eren after just crying your eyes out over him. I don't want you getting sick because of the weather, but if you don't want to, it's fine,"

Jean's eyes widened in surprise as he felt Armin sob softly into his shoulder.

"Jean... your voice... it's really soothing," he sniffled.

The taller male smiled softly and snuggled further into Armin's shoulder, his hold only tightening further.

**o0o0o0o**

(_The door was immediately closed by whoever was watching them, a quick flash of dirty blonde hair flicking out of the way in the process.)_

Eren reached out his arm towards the door while yelling, "Armin, wait!"

He already regret leaving the door open like that, and what was more was that Armin watched him kiss another man. It wasn't even his fault; The brunette ground his teeth in frustration as he took a few hurried steps towards the door. The raven yawned softly before letting a weak laugh escape the back of his throat. Eren looked back at him over his shoulder.

"Run like a cheetah," Levi snickered uneasily.

As soon as he said this, his eyes came out of focus and he slumped onto his side, falling back onto the desk with a dull thud. His unusually clouded irises were barely visible under his half lidded eyes, and his breathing was now coming to an ease. Eren tried his hardest to ignore this and wrenched the door open, hastening over the threshold and looking both ways in search of Armin. He wasn't even sure where the little shit went, and hell, was he fast when he wanted to be. The brunette let out a small groan of frustration and looked back into the office, his eyes swiveling from Levi to Erwin.

The raven was already sound asleep, so he had nothing to worry about besides Armin at the moment. Eren snapped the door shut behind him (though he tried to do it quietly since his superiors were asleep) and quickly bolted into a random hallway, hoping that he'll find Armin in one of the corridors that he absentmindedly ran through. He instantly regret taking Hanji's babysitting job; If he just left them in peace instead of pestering them, his wouldn't of happened. The only things Eren heard were his footsteps and his somewhat heavy breathing. Nothing was heard in the hallways besides him and the faint chattering coming from the dining hall as he neared it.

_'Damn it, Armin, did I hurt you that much? You don't know how terrible I feel right now. I'm so sorry... It wasn't my fault... understand that I'd never do something like this to you. It was a mistake coming here... why was I so ignorant?'_

**o0o0o0o**

Annie folded her arms impatiently as she waited for Bertolt and Reiner. She was told recently where to meet in the castle since the Christmas spirit was preventing soldiers from actually attending their duty, but why send pointless information if they're going to be affected by it too? A violent gust of wind pushed against her, making her step back a bit to maintain her balance. A small shiver ran down her spine; What she'd give for a hot cup of coffee to bring her some warmth at a fierce time like this. She heard a sudden rustling of the bushes furthest from her, but she paid no attention to it.

Whether it was a stray animal or the weather taking its fury out on the woodland, she didn't care. The blonde hugged herself in a vain attempt to keep herself warm. Turning away from the bush, she took a few steps towards the wooden doors that was next to her, hoping that it would bring her some warmth. However, amongst the low howls from the wind and rustling of trees, she heard footsteps. Annie wheeled about, expecting it to be her comrades, but instead, she saw Marlowe. The usual idiotic Marlowe that wore an unimpressed look on his face.

She felt her heart clench uneasily as Marlowe hurried towards her. Did she not tell him to stay in Stohess? Even after four days, he still decides to come after her. The very thought of it made her feel a foreign type of warmth in the pit of her stomach; Marlowe cared for her, and he showed that his emotions were dear. Despite the reunion between the two, she still had her mind set on what was ahead of her, and gave Marlowe a dangerous look as he wrapped his arms around her.

"Why are you here?" Annie asked.

"What do you mean 'why are you here'? I came here for you, smart one," the man huffed.

"You should have stayed back in Stohess,"

Instead of returning the embrace, she wrenched herself out of his arms and took a couple steps back out of his reach. Doing this earned her a pained look from Marlowe; After spending a day's restless time of coming to Karanese and hunting her down, this is what he gains? It was from care, from worry... does she not understand that?

"Marlowe... why did you come here? You know it's not safe, don't put me in such a position right now,"

Marlowe's eyes slightly drooped in disapproval. "I came here for you, don't you understand that? Anything can happen to you; You're still human, remember that!"

"I'm more of a monster than I am human," Annie laughed coldly, "Didn't you say it was the actions that made the holder a monster?"

"Don't say that,"

"Is it a crime to speak freely?" she retorted. "You made a mistake coming here... is there nothing else you can do but mess up?"

"Coming here to protect you wasn't a mistake. I promised I'd do anything to protect you on our first day, don't you remember that?"

"Protect me? Isn't it the other way around? What more have you done but nearly get yourself killed?" Annie turned her back towards him and painfully continued, "Sometimes, I really wonder how I deal with you. I hate being worried for other people like that... it's unlike me. I don't want you to get hurt, and knowing you, you'd probably get yourself killed,"

"I'm not that careless, Annie, I'm not leaving you!" Marlowe growled, "Even if I have to beg you to come back to Stohess, I'll spend as long as it takes to do so! If you don't come back, I'll -"

His sentence was immediately interrupted by a pained groan. Annie's eyebrows slightly furrowed in confusion; She slightly turned her head to the side to take a quick glance at what happened, and what she saw made her heart clench once more. This time, the sudden tightening in her chest made her let out a pained breath and look back in front of her. She didn't like what she saw... no, not at all.

Reiner had apparently showed up in the middle of their pained conversation, and he had enough of it. The blonde had one arm wrapped dangerously tight around Marlowe's neck, his free hand cupped over the other as if it were a switch, waiting to be flipped. It was the perfect position to take if you were to subdue someone, or even worse... crack their neck into pieces. Annie was fully aware that Reiner had taken full control over the man in the mess that he was in. Marlowe's hands instinctively made their way to Reiner's arm and gripped tightly in panic. He didn't want to die this way, and more importantly, he didn't want to leave Annie like this.

"W- What the hell a- are you d- doing?!" Marlowe choked out, clawing at the blonde's arm in a vain attempt to escape.

"I told you already... you made a mistake coming here," Annie said painfully, throwing a dangerous glance back at Reiner.

"Annie, I really don't want to do this... but why did you tell someone other than a former inhabitant of our village? The risk you're taking right now... it's almost suicide," Reiner growled.

"It can't be helped,"

"Do you even regret it? Something can happen to you like that... when did you become so careless?" he asked, ignoring the strangled groan that left the back of Marlowe's throat.

"It can't be helped,"

"It'd be necessary to get rid of something unneeded, but it's painful to do that. Isn't he your boyfriend or something? I didn't think you'd be into Military Policemen, you were so different back in the Survey Corps,"

"It can't be helped!"

"It can be helped, if you play your cards right," Reiner retorted, his hold dangerously tightening around the man's throat, denying him the privilege to breathe freely. "Are you willing to eliminate a pawn in this game to take a step closer to capturing the king?"

Annie slightly drooped her head as she heard Marlowe let out a very perturbed gasp for air. "Whatever benefits us,"

Marlowe's eyes instantly watered as he heard this; Annie was really going to let him die for their sake? Tears fell from his eyes and Reiner's hold tightened significantly. The blonde was trying her hardest not to look back at them, but only one thing made her do so.

"Annie... I love you," Marlowe coughed.

Annie instantly turned back towards him, only to hear a deafening crack and to watch his body go limp.

Marlowe was no longer.

**o0o0o0o**

Levi let out a perturbed groan as he opened his eyes, the world in front of him slowly coming into focus. He didn't even bother trying to sit up; Instead, he questioned why he was sleeping on such a hard surface. After some time, he regained his normal vision and saw that he was still in his office. He finally realized that the 'hard surface' he had been sleeping on was his desk. Another groan left his lips as he slowly sat up from the desk, his hand instinctively making its way up to his hair to start grooming. However, as he heard a breathy chuckle behind him, he instantly stopped his movement.

Turning back, he saw that Erwin was watching him with a rather amused look on his face. The raven rolled his eyes at him and sat up correctly on his desk, running his fingers through his slightly ruffled hair. What was salient (besides his hair) at the moment was why the hell he woke up on his desk. More importantly, why the hell was Erwin still in his office?

"I thought you were dead," the blonde laughed.

"Shut up you piece of shit... I might as well be," Levi spat as he turned back around to face Erwin. "Intoxication is such a bitch... why the hell are you still here?"

"I was waiting for you to get up. You were knocked out for quite awhile," Erwin replied lazily.

"Why would you wait for me to get up? What kind of creeper are you?"

The blonde rolled his eyes at him. "Don't talk as if I was here with you for hours on end, you only lasted a couple of minutes. It's not that I'm a creeper, I was just worried about you. How long was it since the last time you've gotten that drunk – three, four years? You even fell asleep on your desk... I was wondering if you'd get up again anytime soon,"

"Why did I let myself do something like that?" Levi groaned, raising his arms above his head and stretching out his aching back. "Get out of my office... I need to take a nap..."

"It's best if you waited for that nap, no?" the blonde said as he sat up from his chair and pointed at the window. "It's nearly time for dinner – surely you'd like to wait until it's actually time for you to go to bed? You know, try to fix your sleeping schedule?"

Levi thought for a moment before saying, "Fine... this is the last time I listen to you,"

"Good," Erwin smiled.

There was a small pause. The raven looked back at Erwin to question whether he was leaving or not.

"Levi?"

He let out a soft grunt while he slipped off the desk, signaling that the blonde can continue.

"I've been wondering this for awhile now, but... why... does my mouth taste like your favorite coffee...?" Erwin questioned, his voice coming close to 'innocent'.

It took some time for Levi to process this. He didn't fully understand... Erwin didn't really drink coffee. The raven saw that he wore a rather devilish look on his face. After a couple of seconds, it finally hit him, and_ hell_ was the impact terrible. Levi turned away from the blonde and brought a hand up to his mouth, his eyebrows even more furrowed with both confusion and disgust.

_"Oh god,_ _no_," Levi rasped hoarsely into his palm, ignoring Erwin as he burst out laughing behind him.


	17. XVII: Heartbreak

**Note: **I enjoyed writing that last part quite well. Poor Levi... I'm so sorry, it was perfect. I guess you could say that the last chapter or two was the start of Eruri, besides that minor scene in Chapter 7 (Yes, that small part at the end was a hint of Eruri with Erwin comforting Levi, which he continues to do now). I'm not going to be continuing the Eremin in this chapter, mainly because I want this chapter to focus on the elements needed for later scenes in the fanfic. Shit will go down later on, i'll tell you that... but there will be some Jearmin here, and a mention or two on Eremin. That... didn't make sense, did it? Oh well. I highly doubt anyone reads the chapter warnings, anyways... but if you do, I'd like to say danke chu. Usually, in the real world, if someone gets cheated on, they'd like to get their revenge. Well... Armin isn't like that, and this is where Jearmin kicks in. The little shit's a good kid, despite the things he's done so far in life. Also, Levi's "oh god, no" won't last for long (sadly), though he is quite reluctant.

*edit* I noticed that the timeline was making no sense, so fuck life, right? I fixed it though c: I hope not too many people saw that...

* * *

_**XVII: Heartbreak**_

Annie's eye twitched in anger as she watched Marlowe's body suddenly go limp. The deafening crack she heard, the sight before her... it was enough to make anyone scream and try to escape this madness, especially if you were quite attached to the victim. Instead of crying, she allowed her eyes to fall into a dangerous glare at Reiner, but that only earned her a 'tch' of annoyance.

"What, are you going to murder me now?" Reiner asked fiercely, carelessly dropping Marlowe on the floor.

His body hit the ground with a dull thud, only making Annie feel worse. Her heart clenched and unclenched in both grief and anger. It was unlike her to care for someone that much, but it was Marlowe... the idiot she met a couple of months back. Either way, the only think she was left with now was the mission that she yearned to carry out. Annie wheeled around, facing away from a sighing Reiner and brushing her bangs out of her face. The way she tucked her hair behind her ear was somewhat similar to how Marlowe did it, and that managed to comfort her in one way or another.

"Reiner... you didn't have to..."

Apparently Bertolt had been there that whole time, and that fact alone sparked some sort of humor inside of Annie. She knew that Bertolt had disapproved greatly on unnecessary deaths, and Reiner would have to deal with him later. However, despite the feelings she had for Marlowe, she couldn't deny that his death lifted some sort of weight from her shoulders. It was inhumane to think of such a thing, especially if it was your lover, but no one is too sure on who is trustworthy and who isn't.

"Don't worry about it, Bertl... it was necessary. He's right... I was too careless," Annie said with a monotonous voice.

"Was it love that infatuated you?" Bertolt asked quietly, crouching down and readjusting Marlowe's dead body so he lay flat on his back instead of being a crumpled mess on the ground. "It's easy to get lost with love, and sometimes it makes you do things that you normally wouldn't,"

"You're calling me an idiot?" she growled.

"In a sense, yes," the brunette laughed softly. "Everyone makes mistakes, and you know it. Not everyone is perfect... though I'm sure you thought of Marlowe as 'perfect'?"

"Bertl," Reiner warned.

He ignored this and continued, "What's salient in this situation is that we'll have to find an excuse for his death. It won't be simple, pulling this off as an 'accident' – it could have been played as a 3D Maneuver Gear accident, if he wasn't in the Military Police. What will you do now, Annie? Wasn't he your lover? You aren't mourning over his death because you're focused on the future. In other words, it's easy for you to move on,"

"Crying isn't the answer," Annie slightly drooped her head in both anger and embarrassment, "Sure we were together, but what will crying do? It won't bring him back. Crying will be anything but productive, and I'll be completely honest; I don't care for his death because he's just another person in this god forsaken life. What's important now is to carry out what was planned, and it's what I told you two before. … A couple of deaths... isn't too much to ask for,"

Both Reiner and Bertolt were staring at Annie in disbelief, and the perturbed prickling at the back of her neck signaled that perfectly well. She didn't dare turn back towards them, instead she painfully tried to live through the cold atmosphere. The weather certainly didn't help the mood, either.

"Is that so?"

Bertolt was the first to pierce the murderous silence. He reached a hand out to Marlowe's uniform jacket and gripped the edge of the Military crest that was attached comfortably to his pocket. It was skillfully torn off in one movement of the hand, the sudden ripping sound bringing both Reiner and Annie to their senses. Annie wheeled back around and watched as he stood up from the ground and walked towards her, holding out the crest in his hand.

"If a death isn't too much to ask for, then is it too much to ask you to hold this for him? I'm sure he'd like that very much," Bertolt smiled, watching as the blonde took Marlowe's badge in her hands.

"Bertl... why is it that you act so innocent?" Annie asked bitterly.

"I assure you, it's not that my innocence is true," the brunette continued, "I just also happen to know what it feels like to lose someone that was once important to you in your life. Maybe he wasn't my 'lover', but he was like a brother to me at the time. Marlowe a brother to you at one point, wasn't he? What he left you was precious,"

Annie reluctantly stuffed the badge into her pocket and shot another glare at Reiner. "What, are we going to stand here all day?"

Reiner let out a soft sigh as he shook his head. "You never do change, hm?"

The brunette smiled in approval and Annie laughed and said, "You're the one that just doesn't catch the differences,"

**o0o0o0o**

Levi let out a small growl of disapproval as he was placed upon his own desk again, the sudden rustling of papers bringing a soft surge of panic through his veins. Despite the situation he was in at that moment, he still allowed himself to ignore the hands that gripped tightly around his thighs and reached a hand out towards the stack of papers that had fallen over. This earned him a small 'tch' of disapproval.

Erwin rolled his eyes as he watched the raven messily stack the paperwork on his desk. "Is that really all that concerns you now?"

"Not entirely, as you can see," he replied, pointing at how messily he stacked the papers.

The blonde decided to ignore this and gripped both of Levi's wrists, pulling them away from the paperwork and pinning his hands down to the desk. Levi bit his lip as his hands were pinned above his head, laying down flat on his back and wrapping his legs around Erwin's waist to support himself. As much as he liked this position, he couldn't help but be the clean freak that he was and worry about the clutter of paperwork right next to him.

"You little -"

Erwin took this chance to stoop down and expeditiously interrupt the raven with a passionate kiss. His tongue skillfully slithered into Levi's mouth, both lips and appendage moving on their own accord. After a couple of hesitant seconds, Levi brushed his worry aside and started to kiss back. Small sucking noises issued from the two, accompanied by the occasional creaking sound from the desk below them. It squeaked in agony as the weight of two people gradually poured onto it, earning a soft whine from the raven.

He broke away from the kiss and panted, "Erwin, stop... if you break my desk, I swear to god I'll dropkick you,"

"Is that so?" the blonde grinned as he roughly thrust his hips against Levi, the desk squeaking loudly once more.

"I'll see to your funeral personally," Levi snapped, finally showing some resistance against Erwin's restraint.

As he tried to pull his wrists out of Erwin's grasp, the blonde's grip tightened significantly, earning a low growl of disapproval. Erwin once again ignored this and gingerly bit down on his lip, faintly sucking before letting go and pulling away from his lips completely. Despite his restraints, Levi tried to kiss Erwin again, but he barely grazed his soft lips. He whined softly, and that only made Erwin grin cheekily at him.

"I thought you wanted to murder me?" he chuckled.

Levi rolled his eyes. "I was exaggerating. Let go of me already,"

Erwin let go of his wrists, finally granting him the privilege to move freely. He used his elbows to support himself, eventually sitting up correctly on the desk and releasing the blonde's waist. He expected Erwin to kiss him again, but instead, he walked away from Levi and out of his reach.

"Where the hell are you going?" Levi asked with minor disappointment.

"I was planning a visit to the stables the other day, but you managed to keep me behind," the blonde continued, "After all, weren't you so reluctant on even kissing me before?"

Levi let out a small 'tch' and replied, "Then why the hell were we even in that position, then? If you really had plans, you could have told me,"

"You're important to me, and canceling the plans I've already made for you is worth it," he continued, "It'd be nice if you come with me, though. I was meaning to ask you last night, but it completely left me,"

"It's fine, I have paperwork to complete," Levi muttered. "Try not to break your arm while you're handling your mount,"

Erwin smirked as he nodded off Levi's concern. He reached for the cloak he left earlier on the coat hanger, unhooking it and throwing it over his shoulders. It was dark green and had the Wings of Humanity embroidered over the back; The cloak usually worn during missions. Levi gave a questioning look as he slipped off the desk (though his height brought him to a slight disadvantage) and rubbed his wrist where Erwin's bruising hold was.

"Didn't you lose your cloak a long time ago?" Levi asked.

The blonde gripped the doorknob as he replied, "I thought I told you that Armin returned it a day afterward. I'm not sure why he waited so long after I asked him to get it for me,"

"God knows what he did to that thing," he muttered, earning a laugh of approval.

**o0o0o0o**

Armin sat in the comfort of Jean's dorm, slightly fidgeting in his seat in both hesitation and grief. He was unsure whether taking Jean's offer was a good choice or not, but that was the least of his worries at the moment. Jean had invited him to sit in his bed instead of the wooden chair that was placed next to the dusty window, which he would have been more than willing to take. While they were on their way to his room, Armin's tears were already drying up, and his muffled sobs coming to an eventual stop. There was no reason to grow weary at a time like this, but for some reason, the blonde couldn't help but let himself nod off for a moment.

His head drooped to the side as he eventually dives into a very shallow sleep, and as soon as Jean saw this, a warm smile spread across his lips. Armin looked peaceful in his sleep, despite the recent break down that he had, and that was one of the qualities that Jean admired from him. He couldn't deny that he enjoyed the sight that was before him; He never really saw how Armin looked like when he was asleep. That thought alone brought a slight prickle of jealousy in the pit of his stomach. He would have given anything to be Armin's roommate at the moment, but that made Jean feel terrible.

Why was he even hitting on the blonde like this? Wasn't he recently mourning over Marco's death? It made him feel like a hypocrite, as if he had betrayed Marco in some foreign way that was different and unheard of. Betrayal wasn't something that one can simply describe in words, but it certainly hurt on the inside. It was a feeling that can easily make one's heart split in two, or a feeling that can be brushed aside as if nothing happened, depending on the person. Jean watched as Armin coughed softly and resurface from his temporary nap.

Jean wondered if betrayal was the feeling that Armin was experiencing now. Was heartbreak the same as betrayal? Is there even one possible way that the two could be related? Whether it was betrayal or heartbreak that Armin felt right now, he still knew that it was certainly clawing at his aching heart at the moment. At this point, he had already sunk into a deep trance, but was only snapped out of it as Armin shivered and hugged himself to keep warm. The blonde didn't even notice that Jean was watching him, mainly because he had been trying to avoid eye contact this whole time.

Watching this made the taller male feel terrible; The coat he was wearing now was much thicker than the one Armin had draped around his shoulders. Jean stood from his seat and walked to Armin, the sudden creaking of his chair bringing the blonde's attention towards him. As he neared Armin, he saw that his eyes were still somewhat red with shimmering tears lingering at the corners of his eyes. The blonde bit his lip as he saw the sympathetic look on Jean's face. He turned away from the taller male in embarrassment (he knew that he still had tears in his eyes) and didn't even notice that Jean had taken off his coat.

Armin flinched softly with minor surprise as he felt a sudden warmth come over him. Jean had wrapped the thick coat around him, feeling a soft shiver run down his spine with goosebumps erupting onto the smooth surface of his skin. However, thanks to his shirt have long sleeves, Armin didn't see this and fully accepted the coat. It brought him warmth, comforting him further and bringing an absentminded smile to his lips. The taller male saw this smile and left the coat alone, sitting down at the foot of his bed instead of going back to his previous seat. As their eyes finally met, Armin couldn't help but smile wider.

"I'm glad I could cheer you up," Jean grinned.

It was entirely his kindness and persistence that brought a smile to his face. No one really tried to comfort him like this before, besides Eren, Mikasa, and his retired grandfather. What was more was that Jean had finally grown up, stalking away from his previous haughty nature. Armin's hands had left their position around himself and found their way to the taller male's jacket. Taking the lips of his jacket, he tightened it around him, folding his legs back to up his chest and resting his head upon his knees. He was comfortable like this, and he was certainly grateful, but despite all of this he still felt grief in the pit of his heart. Another tear fell from the corner of his eye, earning a concerned look from Jean.

"Are you all right?"

"Don't worry too much about me," Armin croaked, "I'm fine. It just hurts a little bit..."

"'A little bit'? Is that tiny bit of pain making you continue to cry?" he questioned. "That's not true. You're hurting so much on the inside, aren't you?"

"I shouldn't be so shattered... I'm weak, aren't I?" the blonde said as he buried his face into his knees once more and let out a faint sob.

Jean left the foot of the bed and made his way to Armin's side. "You're only human, Armin. You bleed when you fall down,"

"... is it okay to crash and break down like this?"

"It proves you're as human as anyone else," Jean replied with a soothing voice.

He brought his hand to the mewling blonde's head, skillfully weaving his hand through his hair. Armin sniffled furiously and lifted his head to meet Jean, his hand only entangling itself further into his soft locks. The taller male smiled softly and absentmindedly caressed the top of his head, enjoying the faint warmth on his fingertips. Bring his other hand to the blonde's face, he wiped the tears away and gave him a warm smile.

"What more is expected of you if you're wounded? It's only natural to cry; It's not a crime, nor is it a sin to hurt and worry over the person you love,"

"But... w- why was he so willing?" Armin shuddered.

A frown formed over Jean's lips as he continued to cry. Untangling his fingers from the blonde locks, he retreated his other hand and cupped the one that had previously been weaved through his hair under Armin's chin. He gingerly pushed his head up, leaning in towards the blonde and planting a quick kiss to his forehead. This left Armin somewhat flustered; His skin tingled under the contact of Jean's cordial kiss, but was it really meant to be 'friendly'? Even after Jean pulled only centimeters away from the blonde's forehead, he refused to move even a muscle, until he started to talk again.

"I'm not so sure why he would be so 'willing' to cheat on you -" he quickly planted another kiss on the tip of Armin's nose as he heard a soft whimper, "- but what I'm completely sure of is that he certainly made a mistake that he's going to regret -" Armin fidgeted for a bit as he felt another kiss on his cheek, "- There's no reason for you to be shattered into pieces for very long. If he can't see what's in front of him, he's not worth your tears,"

As soon as he finished his sentence, he pulled Armin into a kiss. The kiss itself was very quick, but still warm in its own way. The blonde was completely flustered at this point; He couldn't move any of his muscles, and as much as he wanted to pull away, he couldn't bring himself to do it. They stood motionless for a second, and as soon as Jean started to lean in for another kiss, Armin immediately turned his head the other way. He avoided this kiss on purpose; Even if Eren cheated on him, it didn't give him the right to do the same thing back to him. Jean bit his lip in embarrassment and quickly withdrew his hand from the blonde's chin.

"I'm so sorry -" Armin muttered as he frantically scooted away from the taller male, "- you're a great guy and all -" he dropped the coat on Jean's bed before climbing off of it and hastening towards the door, "- but I'm really unsure of what to do right now. I'm spinning way out of course, Jean... I need time to think by myself,"

"Armin, I'm -"

"It's fine," the blonde cut in, opening the door and half running over the threshold.

It was true, he _was _completely lost at this point. His emotions were being crushed and pushed into various parts of his soul; As amiable (or even romantic) as Jean's actions may have been, he still couldn't bring himself to do such a thing to Eren. Even if the taller male did manage to rob his lips for a quick second or two, it still didn't matter; At this point, Armin's heart completely belonged to Eren and none other. Whether Eren loved him back or not, he won't deny the feelings he has right now. It was very rude, leaving Jean the way he did then, but he panicked.

As the door snapped shut behind him, Jean stood dumbfounded on his bed. The coat in front of him was slightly ruffled from his sudden leave, and so were his sheets. He didn't know what to do, and he certainly didn't know whether he was to chase after Armin or not. After a couple of seconds, he regained his ability to think, and sat back on his bed to process what had happened. He felt his heart clench tightly with remorse.

_'Damn it, Kirstein, what the hell did you do?'_

He bit his lip, though he was clumsy enough to bite hard enough to break skin. Warm blood spurted out of the deep wound, coating his bottom lip and teeth. The feeling of blood on his skin made him feel quite uneasy; He licked the blood off his lip (though the action itself brought an uncomfortable shiver down his spine) and sat back on his bed. His hands found their way around himself, completely ignoring the coat that Armin left behind. He idly watched as the clock struck ten (in the morning), and felt a rather nasty pain in the depth of his heart, as if he was impaled with a sword.

_'I wonder... is this what heartbreak feels like?'_


	18. XVIII: Realization

**Note: **So you finally get to see how gentle Erwin can be. The mare that was used in this chapter was modeled after a horse in real life (though I changed her name up a bit, to where her actual name is this one's nickname). She belongs to one of my uncles back in Mexico, and I just couldn't help but add her in here. It was the perfect scene to do it, so why not? I'm not entirely sure if I got the name of the coat right but... meh. I had some fun writing this chapter...but I think I made the characters waaaay to OOC. Sigh. I decided to further break Armin with the ending of this fanfiction... don't hate me for it, I just had to do it. Trust me on this. I just noticed that I'm making the shifters the antagonists in this fanfic... was that a mistake? Either way, I'm still going to stick with what I had in mind... though I tried my hardest to make them seem 'innocent'. I don't know where the mare is later on in the chapter though, I'm pretty sure I lost her on the way of life. I'm not really going to mention any pairings in this chapter besides Armin thinking over this whole Riren (or Ereri, whichever you choose) situation. Minor language coming your way, with a small dip in Eren and Armin's past (though I think I made them seem too innocent in that part).

* * *

_**XVIII: Realization**_

Erwin tightened his cloak around himself as a rather nasty breeze brushed by him, just threatening to take his loosely draped cloak away from him. Despite the cold weather, he still wanted to pay a visit to the stables, mainly because he was quite fond of horses. Most of the horses there he had already 'met'; Half of their names were picked by him, and atop of that small handful was one of the shorter mares named Ilunabarra.

She stood up to 14.2 hands high, and despite looking as fragile as a newly bloomed rose, she was quite the hard worker and can easily carry two people on her back. What Erwin admired about her was how pretty she was and how expeditious she tends to be. Compared to the other horses that stood 15.0 hands or higher, she was pretty small, but that wasn't a disappointment to him. He'll care for every horse that they carry in their stables, no matter the gender, breed, or size.

The blonde winced softly as the door creaked loudly, earning a disapproving snort or two from the horses within. Closing the door (almost) silently behind him, he slipped off his coat and folded it over his arm, not having a care in the world if he catches a cold. It didn't matter to him now. The stables were oddly warm (most likely because of the horses), and certainly comforting. Erwin admired this greatly; This was one of the very few places he can go to actually take his mind off work for awhile. Even if he couldn't take one of the stallions out for a ride due to the weather, he payed no attention to it whatsoever.

Ilunabarra stood in the furthest stall from the doors, tossing her head impatiently as she expected to be taken out for a ride by the Commander. Erwin gave a warm smile as he absentmindedly threw his coat onto the nearest stack of hay and reached out for the lock on the stable's gate. As much as he wanted Levi to be here with him to enjoy the warmth of both horses and stable, he ignored the guilt and unlatched the door. Ilunabarra snorted softly at the loud creaking sound of the gate, earning a husky chuckle from the blonde.

"Sorry about that – How have you been, Luna?"

Erwin reached his hand out for the mare to sniff, grinning in approval as Ilunabarra gently nudged her nose against the palm of his hand. Her nose was moist and her whiskers tickled his skin. The blonde allowed himself to inch nearer to the mare and gently stroke her snout, his fingers gliding smoothly against the soft surface. She wore a prepossessing coat of strawberry roan, completed with a sprinkle of gray at the base of her forehead. Finding a horse with such a coat was rare within the walls, and most of the small handful were only found in the king's stables. The Survey Corps were lucky to get such a valuable horse, especially since she carried great potential.

The mare flicked her head impatiently, her soft mane bouncing beautifully in response to her action. Erwin didn't remember that she wasn't in a loose stable until now and scanned the the stall in search of where her lead was tied to. The rope was connected to a rusty hook nearest to the door, and it looked like it could break at any given moment. He carelessly tugged the rope away from its connection, and sure enough, the hook broke. Despite the flaxen bedding beneath them, it still crumbled upon impact. The blonde let out a small 'tch' of disapproval as Ilunabarra uneasily stamped her hoof.

"What's wrong, pretty? You're not your usual self," Erwin asked under his breath, retrieving his hand from her mane and taking hold of the rope with both hands. "Do you want to go out for a ride?"

He gained no response whatsoever. She merely tossed her head back and snorted at him, earning a soft pout.

"I take that as a -"

His sentence was interrupted with a grunt of both surprise and confusion as he felt someone's hands snake under his arms and retreat back to his shoulders, pulling him into an unbearably tight hold. He immediately let go of the rope, allowing it to fall to the bedding with a dull thud. With another rustling of the flax, he was roughly pulled backwards out of the stall by whoever his captor was. Ilunabarra let out a shrill whinny and stamped the ground uneasily as if she was threatening to rear, her usually calm eyes now whited. The sudden commotion caused a horse nearest to them to buck, the loud thump only making the situation scarier for her. Erwin grunted again as he tried to break free from the hold, but it was too strong.

The mare continued to whinny in fright, until he heard a gentle voice next to him. "Calm down, girl, it's okay... It's okay..."

A rather tall brunette raised his hands up to Ilunabarra's snout in an attempt to calm her, slowly inching nearer to her in the process. She tossed her head a couple of times before allowing the brunette to take her snout in his large hands and caress her softly. With a defeated snort, she flicked her tail as if she was to whisk away a couple of flies. Erwin's eyes narrowed dangerously; This man looked familiar to him, he couldn't be...

"Commander Erwin, sir? We're heartily sorry," he apologized.

"Bertolt?" Erwin gasped. "What the hell do you think you're doing? Who are you with?"

"Why are you apologizing, Bertl?" the man behind him rasped, "I should be the one that's sorry, making you come here with me like that..."

"It's fine,"

Erwin mustered up all of the strength he had to break free from the man's hold, who he now recognized as Reiner from the 104th Trainee Corps. Before he knew it, he felt a sharp pain in the pit of his stomach as Bertolt's fist violently met his skin. A cough left the blonde's lips, along with a groan of pain, and his struggles almost instantly faltered. For a new recruit, he packed one hell of a punch. Bertolt wore a shy look on his face; He tried his hardest to look at anything but the Commander. Instead, he shifted his gaze to Ilunabarra, who was still uneasily stamping the flaxen bedding beneath her.

"You son of a bitch..." Erwin rasped.

"Was she really a bitch?" the brunette retorted, throwing him a dangerous glare.

He tried to break free from Reiner's hold again, only to be thrown backwards onto the floor. With a dull thud, the back of his head met the hard surface, immediately plastering stars over his eyes. Holding the back of his head, he tried to get up from the floor, only to have his stomach stomped on by the blonde towering over him. Despite the pain he was feeling now, it was quite amazing how strong these trainees turned out to be. Erwin let out a strangled groan as his arms instinctively wrapped themselves around his stomach, curling his figure to ease the pain.

"Commander, didn't you think it was odd how no one was attending their duty during the holiday?" Reiner asked. "Or were you 'busy' with whatever bullshit you have to do in your office?"

"I w- won't deny that the Christmas sp- spirit took its toll on me, too," the blonde coughed uneasily as he unwrapped an arm from his stomach and tried to prop himself up.

"I'm surprised,"

Before he knew it, Erwin felt a searing pain take over his right arm with a sickening crack to accompany it. A strangled cry pushed its way out of the back of his throat as he retreated to the cold floor, his arm throbbing painfully with each heartbeat. Bertolt hissed in disapproval and turned away from the Commander, completely hating the image he was seeing.

"That looked and sounded like it really hurt..."

"Well, shit," Reiner muttered.

Erwin looked up at Reiner and spat, "You little fucker! What the hell is going on? Are you really thinking of betraying the Survey Corps?!"

"... I guess the lights are shining on his face now... things are starting to come into focus," Bertolt murmured.

"We're nearly as lost as you guys - you know, babysitting humanity's last bullshit attempt at saving the world -" Reiner looked at his partner, then back at Erwin and continued, "- Why don't you help us instead? We're all brothers, no? Isn't that what you told us when we first joined the Survey Corps?"

Reiner threateningly raised a foot above the Commander's head as if he was trying to intimidate him, ignoring Bertolt as he uneasily shuffled away from them.

Erwin chuckled darkly and rasped, "_I'd rather you get away with my murder,_"

The last thing Erwin heard was a small 'tch' of disapproval.

**o0o0o0o**

"Hey Eren!"

Eren panted heavily while he tried to refill his lungs with air. His legs burned almost painfully after dashing through the halls in search of Armin. Where the little guy disappeared off to, he'll never know. He bent down a bit to place his hands on his knees to catch his breath for a moment, completely oblivious to everything (and everyone) around him. He didn't even notice that someone was calling him, until he felt someone's hand on his shoulder.

"Eren? You look exhausted, are you all right?"

"Connie?" the brunette asked, finally standing up straight.

Eren's breathing was less ragged now, but he still didn't pay too much attention to Connie. He watched as Connie clapped his hands together with an accomplished look on his face.

"So I thought for a while, and I decided to get Sasha a sack of potatoes wrapped in a scratchy sweater! Pretty cool, huh? She loved it!"

"That's very nice," Eren absentmindedly replied, scanning the dining hall for Armin.

"I was thinking of giving her this ring, too -"

"Marriage?!" The brunette coughed in surprise. "How did you manage to get a ring for that?"

"Shh," Connie hissed as passersby grinned or even laughed at them. "I'm not planning marriage, smart one, I wanted to ask her out,"

"That's adorable,"

He rolled his eyes at the brunette. "Shut up, Eren,"

"Anyways... have you seen Armin anywhere?" Eren asked, going back to his search around the dining hall. "I've been looking for him everywhere, but I can't find him,"

"I don't know, I haven't seen him either," Connie said as he stretched his back out with a look of mild interest on his face. "Then again... I haven't seen Jean around here either. I think he's still mourning over Marco's death, the poor guy,"

Eren's eyes narrowed dangerously. "Did you see Armin with that horse-faced bastard?"

"I'm telling you, I haven't seen Armin _at all _today,"

He let out an irritated 'tch' and turned away from Connie. In the distance, he spotted Mikasa sitting next to Sasha; They were eating their breakfast together. It's different, seeing his sister actually eat for once, but that only lifted some of the weight off his shoulders. He left Connie talking to himself (_"I was thinking of getting a prettier ring, but I didn't know where to find one. There's not too many – Eren? Where'd you run off to?") _and weaved through the tables, soon finding himself trapped within Mikasa's look of concern.

"Eren? Are you all right? You look pale,"

"I'm fine, I just came back from a run," Eren half-lied immediately.

"Were you caught stealing a potato?" Sasha snickered. "I nearly died that day,"

Mikasa smiled softly as Sasha said this and turned back to Eren, hopefully asking, "You were running? Do you want me to get you some water?"

"Now's not the time, Mikasa," the brunette said impatiently. "I'm sorry – I've been looking for Armin and I can't find him anywhere. Apparently Jean's absent, too,"

Mikasa's eyes narrowed dangerously. The daring look she had in her eyes took both Sasha and Eren by surprise; It was unlike her to have such a look of hatred on her face. She remembered the time she overheard Annie and Reiner talking about Annie and Eren, she knew this was going to happen. What took her by surprise was how easily it happened and how early it came in. Out of all the nights she spent skulking through the castle before Christmas, why didn't she see anyone breaking in? Her catlike senses didn't allow that to happen. This made her even more frustrated.

"I'm looking for him," she snapped, immediately standing up from the table and abandoning her half eaten loaf of bread.

"Mikasa -"

"Shut up," the raven retorted.

This took Eren by full surprise; The way Mikasa replied to him seemed inhumane. It wasn't like her at all, she'd never snap like that. What riled her up so much? Instead of arguing further, he allowed her to skilfully brush past him and weave expeditiously through the tables and soldiers, soon finding her way out the doors and into the hallways.

"It looks like she already knows where to go, huh?" Sasha said as she reached for the left overs. "That's Mikasa for you, I guess,"

Eren shook his head in disbelief. "There's something I don't know,"

He ignored Sasha's 'hmph' of concern while stuffing the bread into her mouth as he muttered that under his breath. The brunette hastened out the dining hall and into the hallway, making his way towards his dorm room. If Armin wasn't back in their dorm, then there was only one more place he could possibly be at; The library. Armin spent his time in the library no matter what, even if he felt as if he was barely clinging onto the edge of a cliff with his stress and worries weighing him down. This was one thing Eren admired about the blonde; No matter what, he always found some way to calm down and take a breath, which was something Eren had trouble doing, especially when it came to Jean.

He glided through the hallways, each hurried footstep he took bouncing off the walls with a small echo. In no time at all, he found himself in front of his door, immediately hastening to open it with his key. As he jammed the key into its socket, he felt that the doorknob was unusually loose, meaning that it was already opened. His heart skipped a beat or two as he opened the door and peered into the room. To his greatest disappointment, Armin was nowhere in sight. A defeated sigh left his lips as he walked like a dead man into his dorm and lazily shut the door behind him. He felt terrible for what happened earlier; Armin didn't know that it was a mistake, nor did he know that Levi was drunk at the time.

There was only one hope left on cheering Armin up, but first, he had to find the bastard somewhere in the god forsaken castle. He knelt down at the foot of his bed and reached his hand into the mattress as far as his strength would allow. After hopelessly groping through the weight and uncomfortable feeling of the springs, he felt his fingertips brush against a ripped piece of leather. Eren let out a gasp (_"Yes!"_) and gripped onto the object, hauling out from its hidden cave. What he held in his hand was a book, bound in leather and bearing the title _'Landscapes of the World'. _As he continued to stare at the book, a smile crept onto his face without warning.

_**.**_

_**.**_

_"Eren, look at this!"_

_The brunette looked behind him and saw that Armin was carrying a rather heavy looking book in his hand. It was bound in silky leather with not a scratch to be seen on it. Eren raised his eyebrow in curiosity and watched as Armin held out his hand, tucking the book under his arm._

_"Come with me! It's a secret, and you have to keep it no matter what!" Armin squeaked excitedly._

_Eren allowed himself to reach out to Armin, only to feel his hand being uncomfortably grabbed by the excited blonde and pulled through the crowded streets of Shiganshina. As they weaving through the merchants, priests, peasants, and children, Eren started to feel his impatience boil in the pit of his stomach._

_"Armin, where -"_

_"Trust me, Eren, you'll love it!"_

_They found their way into an empty alleyway that's only light source was the illuminated windows above them. Eren immediately recognized this passageway; They would usually go through here when they were going to their 'secret' hideout. The fact that Armin was going out of his way to force himself to half run all this way despite being physically frail only made his curiosity spark brighter. They made it into a clear opening, that was completed by a beautiful tree, blooming flowers, and butterflies fluttering delicately from flower to flower._

_Armin finally let go of his hand and said, "Over here, sit with me,"_

_They sat next to each other at the foot of the tree as the usually did, but this time Mikasa wasn't there with them. Eren watched as Armin excitedly pulled out the book from under his arm and flip through it impatiently, finally stopping at a certain page and holding it up for Eren to see._

_"Look! It says right here that there are huge bodies of water that are filled with salt! There's also fire water, and mountains of ice – look, isn't it precious?"_

_"Armin, these kind of books are illegal! You'll get in trouble if you're caught!" Eren hissed, yet he couldn't deny that the fire water sparked his interest._

_"So what? I found it in my Grandfather's library – look at all the pictures..."_

_The brunette studied Armin as he laid back on the tree and flipped through the book, occasionally stopping here and there with a spark of curiosity in his eyes. Eren yawned softly and laid back on the tree right next to Armin, the warmth coming form the blonde comforting him and guiding him further down the path of weariness. As he let out another yawn, Armin looked at him with a confused look._

"_Am I boring you with this?" he asked with a disappointed tone in his voice._

_"No – No, you're just so warm... I'm comfortable here,"_

_Armin smiled softly and wrapped an arm around Eren. "It's fine, I don't mind if you sleep here,"_

_"Won't I bother your reading?" the brunette asked._

_"Not at all,"_

_The blonde went back to flipping through the pages of his book, leaving Eren completely flustered. Without thinking, Eren shifted himself for a bit and leaned towards Armin, planting a quick kiss to his cheek. The blonde squeaked softly at the sudden contact and looked back at Eren with a confused look on his face._

_"Was that a kiss?"_

_"Yes," The brunette replied innocently, "Mom always said that anyone can kiss the person that they care about. Since you're my best friend, that means I can kiss you, right?"_

_Armin thought for a moment. "I think so, and since you're my best friend too -" he kissed Eren's forehead and smiled softly, "- that means that I care about you,"_

_The brunette let out a small laugh and reached for his book, snatching it out of his hands and reading the paragraph that he had his finger on. Armin's eyes widened with minor surprise as he saw this; Eren wasn't one to really be interested in books, especially ones with such tiny letters on each page. After a moment's thought, he started to read along with Eren._

_He absentmindedly asked, "Eren, will we be best friends forever?"_

_"Yeah, why not?" the brunette grinned, "We'll stay friends so we can see the outside world together someday,"_

_"You mean it?!" Armin gasped._

_As Eren nodded vigorously, the blonde giggled in excitement._

**_._**

**_._**

"Dear god, we were such innocent little shits at the time," Eren laughed to himself as he flipped through the pages of his book. With a soft grin, he muttered under his breath, "I wish I was 6 again... those were the happy times,"

The brunette shook his head in disapproval and snapped the book shut. He shouldn't be thinking about that at a time like this; He stood up from the foot of his bed and tucked the book into his coat, shivering softly as a chilling breeze brushed past him when he opened the door. He walked off in the direction of the library, where he'd hope to find Armin reading or even studying, if he was _that _agitated.

**o0o0o0o**

The breeze viciously tugged at Armin's hair, resulting in him tightening the coat around him to keep warm. He didn't know where to go at this point; Should he go back to his dorm or find Eren? Small shivers ran down his spine, the goosebumps on his skin only threatening to get worse by the minute. Why was the castle this cold all of the sudden? It certainly felt odd. Despite the wind pushing him with nearly each step he took, he still felt a perturbed prickle at the back of his neck. He stopped dead in his tracks.

Was someone watching him?

With the easy twist of the ankle, he spun about, eyes scanning the area for whoever was there with him. He found nothing; This made him laugh quietly to himself. What was he so paranoid about? Hesitantly running a hand through his hair, he went back to walking through the hallway. Though he had no place in mind to go to at the moment, his feet instinctively led him through the castle as if they had the mind of their own. After some time, Armin recognized the series of passages and saw that he was walking to the library. This made him sigh in relief. Of course, the library.

He felt somewhat horrible on the inside for not going to straight to Eren, but some part of him told him not to. As he swiftly turned the corner at the end of a corridor, he felt another prickle at his nape and upper back. Why was he being so paranoid? Instead of turning around again, he simply ran a hand along his nape, though his pace did slow down quite a bit. Was it just the after effects kicking in after such a tiresome morning? A sudden cracking sound made him stop dead in his tracks.

A leaf had been stepped on?

Turning once more, he saw that a dead leaf had been shattered into pieces right at the corner that he recently walked past. Both curiosity and fear started to creep upon him; Should he investigate or run for help? Sure he'd rather be safe than sorry, but for some reason, the curiosity bubbling in the pit of his stomach managed to overthrow the fear. He inched towards the leaf, though his approach was quite slow. Just as he reached the corner, he stopped; A faint image of Mikasa flashed before his eyes.

Mikasa's voice echoed in his ears: _'Hide and seek, Armin,'_

_'… Hide and -?' _Armin's eyes widened as he took a step back in an attempt to run. '_ … Oh god,'_

With a quick flash of blonde hair and the bright glint of an eye, a terrified cry rang throughout the hallway.


	19. XIX: Betrayal

**Note: **Well damn, that cliff hanger. I'm quite proud of how that whole "every cause has an effect" thing took its toll in that chapter. Which is why we plan out what we're going to write, you guys. This chapter will show you what happens when you try to lie to Big Sister Mikasa... god knows how she can tell if you're lying or not. She's scary when she's angry, isn't she? I think I went a bit overboard with that... but then again, this fanfiction never did like Jean, did it? Poor him... but I won't say that it was a mistake making all of this bullshit happen to him. It just lead from him being a pompous asshole in the beginning to where he is now, an asshole who kind of cares and takes things seriously... 90% of the time. And remember Erwin in the last chapter? Did I scare you with that? I apologize for adding in a scene that would have made the perfect murder. This chapter will reflect a little of what happened in chapter 13 (Hide and Seek), where betrayal impales the souls of many and death's after effects come into play (especially when you have a smart ass at your feet).

* * *

**_XIX: Betrayal_**

Jean snapped the door shut behind him and let out an irritated 'tch' as sudden contact of stone cold weather reached his skin. He wrapped his arms around himself in a vain attempt to keep warm, walking down the chilling hallway with devestating shivers running throughout his body. Each disturbed tingling sensation brought goosebumps to his skin, instantly making him regret not bringing his coat. He couldn't find himself to even touch it after Armin because of the terrible burn of remorse that ran through his chest. It was almost unbearably cold; Not the weather, the feeling.

Footsteps echoed throughout the hallway, which Jean thought that it was himself at first. After a couple of confused seconds, he noticed that the footsteps were too hurried for his own, and if anything, threatening. He came to a precipitous stop, causing him to stumble for a bit before wheeling around to see who was behind him. His heart gave another unwilling clench of both remorse and fright; Mikasa was right behind him, staring at him through darkened eyes. The glare itself was enough to scare anyone... or did that only apply to Jean?

"Mikasa?"

She took a threatening step forward and said, "Where the hell is Armin?"

"I didn't see him today," Jean lied immediately. "I thought he was spending his Christmas with Eren?"

The sudden tightening at the collar of his shirt caused him to let out a troubled cough. Mikasa had instantly reached for him and gripped, forcing him closer to her. He was snared within the path of her dangerous glare, giving him the feeling of being drenched in ice cold water. Why was Mikasa like this? More importantly, was Armin actually lost somewhere in the castle, up to the point when even Mikasa couldn't find him? It's impossible to think that.

"You're lying to me, aren't you?" Mikasa deadpanned, her breath tumbling over the taller male's skin. "You'd never say something like that without a sneer on your shitty little face. I know how much you hate Eren. Aren't you one hell of an actor?"

"I wouldn't lie about something like this,"

This certainly clicked Mikasa's impatience. She growled in frustration and tightened the grip around his collar. With the flex of her arm, she easily threw him against the wall that was next to them. Jean groaned in minor pain as his back came in contact with the gelid structure, his hands immediately gripping the raven's wrists as she took his collar in her fists once more.

"Say that one more time, you little shit," she snarled, "I dare you,"

"Did you try looking for him at all in this god forsaken castle?" Jean growled. "Some part of me thought I knew you, and said that you could easily find him if you tried. Are you telling me he's nowhere to be found?"

Her grip tightened significantly, earning a groan of protest. "Don't be smart with me. If Eren couldn't find him anywhere after running to his legs' own limit, what makes you think I'd have a chance at finding him? They were always so close to each other... they know each other more than I know myself,"

"What makes you think I'd know where he was?" Jean coughed, his breathing becoming heavier by the minute with the restraint around his neck. "I hardly know anything about him, but I know just enough to determine whether he cared or not,"

Mikasa applied much more strength to her hold, now completely cutting off his ability to breathe. He coughed in agony and thrashed fruitlessly, clawing at her wrists as if begging her to let go.

She forced his head down to her shoulder and rasped in his ear, "I'm willing to assassinate anyone who comes in my way. My specialty is a quick and easy kill, whether it be Titan or human. The murder of one soldier will be enough to tell anyone that I want answers. I'm not playing around with you anymore, Jean. I'm only going to ask you this one last time; Do you know where Armin is or not?"

"_Yes!_" Jean practically screeched despite the lack of oxygen.

As soon as this left his chapped lips, she let go of him, allowing him to slump to the ground and gasp hoarsely for air. His hands immediately made their way to his neck and massaged softly, his breathing ragged after nearly being strangled to death. Mikasa idly watched him through frigid eyes; As much as the picture seemed depressing, she was quite pleased with herself for achieving such a thing from a hard-headed soldier. Either way, she wouldn't have killed him for it. As much as she hates to admit it, she can't bring herself to kill a comrade so easily. She cursed herself highly for this.

He finally spoke: "I can't tell you exactly where he went right now. Earlier today, I walked in on him crying his damned eyes out over heartbreak, and I found myself trying to comfort him. He did the same for me before when I was mourning over Marco's death, so I figured I'd pay him back. It was cold outside and I brought the little shit back to my dorm so he can get some rest and calm down after all that crying. However, my shitty self decided it'd be nice to try to rob the bastard's lips, and he ran off into the castle. God knows where he went, but let's just hope he's okay,"

Only some of the weight on Mikasa's shoulders lifted as she heard this, but she was still concerned about Armin being missing. As much as she hated the fact that Jean tried to kiss him, she couldn't bring herself to be angry about it. If anything, she was relieved; Armin was probably sulking in a corner somewhere, or in the library like he always is. Her overall panic about Armin had been lifted from her very core, but soon enough, she found herself feeling (somewhat minor) remorse over what she did to Jean. The raven watched as he caressed the area that had been caught within her hold, his breathing gradually coming to an ease.

She knelt down at Jean's side, and without warning, she wrapped her arms around him. Jean's muscles came to an abrupt stop, staying motionless as he felt Mikasa sigh against his shoulder.

"... My apologies... I got carried away from my panic and worry... thank you for telling me," Mikasa breathed.

"I can't believe you're not angry after that," Jean muttered.

"Not at all. I'm relieved. You don't know how much I care about those two... Armin was always like a brother to me. It hurts me to see Eren agitated and worried, so I went to the extend of a death threat to find Armin and try to bring him back to Eren... so he'd be happy again..."

Jean's hand found his way to her shoulder and gripped. "You sound completely mental. It's unlike you to say such things without a damn in the world, but I'm glad that you care about them in such a way. I understand that you were desperate to do something about this situation... it can't be helped,"

Mikasa immediately collected herself and slapped his hand away, pushing herself away from him. She took a couple of steps back to distance themselves and folded her arms in embarrassment.

"Why don't you just... go eat breakfast or something...?"

He smiled softly at this.

"It's okay to break down every now and then, Mikasa,"

**o0o0o0o**

_Drip, velvet drip._

_"You're the has-been of husbands, aren't you?"_

_Drip by velvet drip._

_"Taking sour sips from life's lush lips,"_

_His blood dripped slowly onto the ground, the sharp 'tink' of water meeting water ringing throughout the room with each time it came in contact._

_"Sharpening the knives of young wives,"_

_Breathing was heard amongst those sharp rings. It was very calm, flowing easily – gently – swiftly._

_"The fawns are being hunted upon the lawns that predators managed to take for their own,"_

_Innocent footsteps joined with the sound of trickling water, both dancing together in unison. Wind brushing past one's ears, the high pitched whisk leading the beating of footsteps and water. It sounded like a heart beating soundly in an infant's chest; One beautiful melody – from the soft voices of the angels seated in the palm of God's hands._

_"Have you started singing too soon, I wonder? Why did you two get so close if you were only to destroy the music with your blistered feet?"_

_Drip, drip._

_"- Yes, we did,"_

_He felt a sudden wetness on the side of his face, only to see that it was a dank cloth. It was warm, comforting – enjoyable, lovable. Someone so caring – who? Someone was trying to reach out to him – but why? His hand immediately found its way to the source and gripped; As soon as he tightened his fingers around it, the water trapped within the material gushed out, sprinkling over the side of his face and ear. The water was everywhere – what was his position? Laying? Standing? Leaning?_

_"She's with another man now, happy as can be, but didn't you say you'd never find love again as humanity's loyal Commander?"_

_"- I found him,"_

_"Him?"_

_"- I found him,"_

_"Is he fully aware of the risk?"_

_"- I found him,"_

_"You've been secretly admiring him for years now. Has your interest been quenched? I wonder; How long ago was it since you two first met?"_

_"- I found him,"_

_"Innocent tears running down his cheeks?"  
_

_"- I found him,"_

_"You saved him before he was put behind bars, didn't you?"  
_

_"- I found him,"_

_"The love you have now?"_

_"- We found it together,"_

_He saw that teeth marks were sunk into the surface of the cloth; A rather distinctive mark, yet the source was undetectable at this time. Water trailed down his hands and onto his wrist, dripping onto the floor in time with his blood. Drip by drip; He's breathing, sleeping. Sinking... breaking. The strength in his grip had increased dramatically with the unwilling clench of his heart. The sparkling water that was splashing onto him was soon tainted with blood. It was blackened – darkened with the sins of one's soul._

_"- I'm leaving him?"_

_"Only if you want to,"_

_"- I'm leaving?"_

_"You won't remember him,"_

_"- I'm leaving?"_

_"You lived a good life,"_

_"- I'm staying,"_

_"Pardon?"_

_"- I want to stay with him,"_

_"How are you too sure that he'll return the warmth?"_

_"- I wanted us to live peacefully together. With cold headaches and sweet avalanche,"_

_"The life of a husband and wife?"_

_"- Robbing his lips under a glass moon. He'll like that, won't he?"_

_"May I throw stones at this moon you speak of?"_

_"- By all means,"_

_"Won't it ruin your relationship with him?"  
_

_"- We'll pull through any pain that comes our way,"  
_

_A sudden warmth instantly found its way to the corners of his eyes. He allowed it to pour out of him, his breathing hitching as he cried freely. Despite his opened mouth and troubled breathing, not a sound left his lips; All was still, besides the sound of trickling water, blood, footsteps, and singing. Soft voices in his ears. The melody calmed him, though the tears refused to stop. He brought a hand up to his eyes to wipe, and as he looked at the palm of his hands, he saw blood smeared over it._

_"What're you going to do, Smithy? Are you going with me or staying here?"_

_The blood that was trickling out from the corners of his eyes came to an abrupt stop._

_"So you're staying?"  
_

_"- They need me here,"_

_"Staying in this eternal hell when you can leave with me to heaven?"_

_"- I'd rather burn in hell with him than live in peace without him,"_

_"Despite the murders, you have a pure heart. My compliments,"_

_He heard a distant whinny from a horse and the hurried footsteps of men._

"Commander! Commander, are you all right?!"

_He also heard a voice whisper in his ear: "Remember me. I'll come back for you when the time is right. Until then, shower him with affection and prove yourself useful to the thousands that depend on you,"_

_All was dark, and the beautiful melody came to a sudden end. He felt his lips curve into a pained smile._

_"- I wouldn't have thought that I'd give Death my thanks,"_

**o0o0o0o**

Armin fell to the frigid earth with a dull thud, slightly skidding on the ground in the process. The sudden impact to his head brought stars in front of him, thick tears immediately swelling in the corners of his eyes. It denied him perfect vision of what was happening, and _hell _did it scare him. He heard a few delicate footsteps coming his way, resulting in him trying to squirm away in panic. He didn't know what to do, he didn't remember where he was going. The footsteps came to a stop right next to his head, and in fear that he'd experience another painful blow to the skull, he threw his arms over his head in fear. A breathy chuckle left the attacker's lips as he did that.

"You're delicate,"

_'That voice... it's familiar,'_

Blinking stupidly, he looked up and saw the blurred image of a woman towering over him. She had blonde hair, held up in a messy bun. This couldn't be...

"Annie... why?" he asked, his voice cracking as if threatening that he'd break down into tears at any given moment.

She knelt down and grabbed one of the arms that were protecting his head, forcefully tugging it out of the way and pinning it above his head. Straddling his stomach, she carelessly applied most of her strength to the hold, his wrist cracking painfully as it threatened to break. Armin hissed in discomfort and tried to pull away from the restraint. His free hand immediately found its way to her shoulder and tried to push her away, but he had hardly any strength to accomplish that. Defeated tears left his eyes as he felt his wrist crack once more, yet this time, it actually broke.

As he howled in pain, Annie hissed, "Shut up, you dumb ass, someone will hear you,"

"That's the point!" he shrieked, earning another hiss.

Annie's hand swiftly buried itself into the pocket of her jacket and pulled out an injection, the sudden glint of the needle causing Armin to squeak in fear. He was too weak to actually fight back, and the pain in his heart and wrist certainly didn't help out with that. As he faced defeat, and possibly the fact that he was going to lose Eren, even more tears leaked out of his eyes. He began crying freely, earning a 'tch' of annoyance from Annie.

"Quit crying, you bastard, it makes me feel even worse than I do now," she snapped, sinking the needle into his arm without a care in the world if it even hit a vein. "I'm sorry about your wrist, but seriously, if you didn't thrash around like that, I wouldn't have done it,"

"Sh- Shut up," he squeaked weakly, the sudden pain from the needle being forced into his skin intensifying the overall pain he felt, both internally and externally.

He felt a sudden warmth fill his arm as Annie squeezed its contents into his body; Whatever the hell that liquid was, it certainly didn't feel like a regular injection. It felt as if fire was raging through his body, the sudden overall warmth immediately going to his head. He felt dizzy, instantly dropping his head back to the ground and groaning in pain. As soon as she pulled out the needle, he allowed his arm to fall back to the ground, the sudden impact on his broken wrist earning another mewl of pain.

"If it'll make you feel any better, I _did _care for you at one point," Annie sighed, standing up from the ground and stepping over Armin. "You instantly knew it was me, didn't you? I'm sorry I didn't end it then and there,"

Despite the numbing pain, the blonde rubbed the tears away from his eyes and looked up at Annie. A sudden cold sensation ran down his back, as if he had been dunked head first into an icy river; Annie's eyes were emotionless, sunken deeper into darkness than anything he's ever seen before. She had the eyes of someone that had been broken into several pieces... the eyes of someone that was mourning.

"Annie... did you lose someone precious to you?" he panted.

Her eyes narrowed dangerously. "That doesn't concern you,"

The corner of a badge was barely visible at the lip of her pocket, instantly catching Armin's eyes. He lifted up the hand that was uninjured and pointed to it, saying, "What is that? A badge?"

"That doesn't concern you, you little shit!" Annie snarled, stuffing her hand into her pocket and hiding the badge.

Armin knew he hit close to home; He saw the faintest trace of tears in her eyes as soon as he said that.

"The demons are trying to hold you down, aren't they? Your knees are bleeding after that fall. Tell me; Who was it that died? Family... lover?"

"Shut up!" she said as she threateningly raised a fist.

"So it was your lover? How can someone be stupid enough to love you, hm? You betrayed humanity to the fullest extent, and here you are now, killing your own comrade," Armin laughed weakly.

"You're facing death so well, but I highly doubt that the injection I gave you will kill you so quickly,"

Armin tried to prop himself up on one arm. "I'm willing to die for the one I love, if that's what you're saying. Yet dying for someone else... you'd never do that, would you? You only look out for yourself in this cruel world,"

She growled in disapproval and dropped her fist, saying, "That's the only meaning our world has. We have to survive, not to bullshit with other people. I'd rather be feared than 'loved'. Fear is the only thing that keeps two people bound and loyal, whereas love can easily be broken by one or the other,"

_'Like Eren did to me,'_

As Armin successfully propped himself up on one arm, he said, "Annie – does it run in your blood to betray the ones that you love?"

Once he said that, her foot came in contact with the side of his face, instantly sending him back to the ground with a loud whimper. Annie was breathing heavily with fury, tears immediately finding their way to the corner of her eyes. She regret allowing herself to fall in love with Marlowe, she regret allowing herself to get into this situation in the first place. Ignoring the blonde that cowered at her feet, she turned her back towards him and chuckled darkly.

"Weren't you recently crying over the one that you 'love'? I only heard a small portion of it; Eren cheated on you?"

Armin felt his heart clench painfully.

"Listen to me, Armin. What makes you think Eren would love a piece of shit like you? Just look at you now; What makes you think he'd love a useless person like you, who can only cower at one's feet?"

"Annie, that's not -"

"It's true," she laughed coldly, "You're the reason why he nearly died at Trost that day, and you're the reason why hundreds of soldiers died when we tried taking our land back. It would have been easier to let the Titans take a very small portion of our land, not sacrificing numerous lives,"

"It was necessary!" Armin cried.

"It's necessary to sacrifice people's lives? Might I remind you that Eren nearly got eaten by a Titan when you were retaking Trost? Yet another near death experience, and it was all your fault,"

"You're lying..."

"Why would I lie? Didn't your mother die because of you? She died giving birth to you, and your father left you to your grandfather because you happened to turn out physically frail and useless,"

"... I regret ever telling you that story," he muttered coldly, "but that wasn't the reason I was left with my grandfather,"

"We cared for each other at some point during our training, no? It was just some bullshit emotion that blinded us. But, in the end, you still held on to the feelings you had towards Eren ever since you were a child, despite the thought that he may not even like you back in that sense. I'm surprised you're even in a relationship with Eren; He can do much better than you,"

"Annie, stop..."

"Even Mikasa looks down on you,"

"_Stop it!_" he shrieked, glaring at Annie with tears flooding his eyes.

Annie didn't see his tears, but she can hear it in his voice. "I'm only telling you the truth. Why not be useful for once? Oh, that's right – _you're too weak_,"

Once she said this, she disappeared off into the depths of the castle, trying her hardest to ignore the pained sobs that forced their way past Armin's lips.

* * *

**Extra Note: **As much as I want to bring myself to killing Levi and Jean later on in the fanfiction, I can't do it. My fingers simply refuse to type it down. Consider yourselves lucky for the author being too soft to kill the characters she's fond of Q_Q


	20. XX: Pain

**Note: **Holy shit, I'm really proud of that last chapter. I'm just - I'm done. I'm so done. I didn't think I'd write anything like that in a long time (Erwin's little purgatory). Well, now you know Erwin's been crushing on Levi since he joined the Survey Corps, and it soon developed into the bullshit we call 'love', which is why he won't allow himself to die. Fancy, isn't it? Just a brief explanation. I'm planning on scratching Levi just for a bit in this chapter... but besides that, I'm focusing on Armin for a bit. That injection he got; No, it's not exactly poison... but it can be poisonous. It's hot... it basically burns his insides... HINTITY HINT. Ah, fuck it. Minor language coming your way. Enjoy the chapter, you guys.

Just a small warning; Remember when I promised you self harm in the information/summary? Yeah, well... I kept that promise. So... here you go. I'm just telling you right now, though, I'm against self harm to the fullest extent. I'm not encouraging anyone to cut themselves, it's pretty damn stupid. To those with anxiety, depression, scars over their skin... I love you guys and you have my full support. I actually cried while writing this chapter... It's hard to imagine anyone harming themselves. It's way too damn hard.

By the way, I just noticed that the last 6 or 7 chapters take place on the same day. Believe it or not, it's true; This is all happening on Christmas. Well god damn, there goes my pacing, right? Trust me, chapter 21 or 22 will take place after Christmas... and now you're thinking "how the hell does that make a difference?" I also think... that I made this chapter way too bloody. You guys don't mind, right?

And Eren... I let myself break him up for a bit in this chapter. Life... stop it.

* * *

**_XX: Pain_**

The pain flowing through Armin's veins, the heat, the prickling on the point where he received the injection... it all started to fade away – Slowly, and carefully. The blonde simply lay there, and not a chill dared to run down his spine. His arm was numbed, and his broken wrist certainly didn't help the overall situation. What will happen if he stayed there? Most of the soldiers are already at their dorms, while the lower recruits were down in the cramped barracks, so who would come to his rescue now? It's not like he could depend on Eren or Mikasa; He couldn't bring himself to think such a thing anymore. He didn't like being called weak, even if it was true.

He didn't blame anyone but himself for being physically frail, especially after five years of training with his comrades. Would he rather die than live the life of a failure? He was already living the life that he dreaded, so what more can he do now? To lay there, useless and cowering, only making his condition worse. He felt as if he was on fire; Fervent tears covering his face, blood rushing to his head as the injection started to take its toll. Absentmindedly wiping the tears away, he rolled onto his back, so he was facing the cracked ceiling.

Was this how he was going to die? Would it have been easier if he committed suicide when he watched Eren get eaten alive? Over time, he started to regain some of his strength, and surprisingly, he no longer felt light headed. Was rest what he needed? He didn't even know how long he lay there, but after awhile, he was able to prop himself up on one arm. What was that injection, and why did it pull him into the depths of hell for only a short amount of time? He didn't know what it was, nor had he any idea what it could have been; Poison would have killed him by now.

Despite his thoughts of allowing himself to lay there and fall into Death's hands, he still forced himself to get up, though the first few attempts were quite hard. The kick he recently received to the skull made his eyes blur and his head pound, but that still didn't stop him. He considered it a miracle to be standing up right now, though it took him some time to process what had just happened. Two blows to the head... that could have killed someone. Should he be thankful that Annie held back? It would be inhumane to secretly wish that he was just killed right then and there, but he couldn't stop himself from doing so.

Instead of proceeding to walk towards the library, he made for the nearest restroom instead; His stomach turned and clenched, as if threatening to make him vomit at any given moment. He tried his best to walk normally in case he ran into a soldier, though his extremely pale face and panting really didn't help at all. His wrist was still broken, and _hell_ did it hurt him, but at the end of the day, he still didn't care for going to the infirmary. He hid his broken wrist in the pocket of his thin coat, the soft cotton bringing some sort of comfort to the pain. As he turned the corner of an empty hallway, he walked right into something soft, though he started to panic once he saw that what he walked into was his superior.

"Arlert?"

"I- I'm so sorry, sir!" the blonde squeaked. "Something I can help you with?"

The person he walked into was Mike, and _hell _was his height intimidating. Armin shuffled his feet impatiently as Mike sniffled softly. He scrunched his nose with a rather disgusted look on his face.

"Have you been laying on the floor? You're sweating like mad – are you all right?"

"I'm fine," Armin laughed awkwardly, taking a few steps back to create some sort of distance.

"Is that so?" Mike's eyes narrowed. "You should go to the infirmary and get yourself checked out. You might be getting a fever,"

"I'd rather go to the restroom, sir... I'm not quite sure if breakfast agreed with my stomach,"

Armin left his superior as quickly as he could, slightly stumbling over his own two feet as he hastened away from him. Mike let out a small 'hmph' and continued on his way, passing their little meeting over as if nothing happened. However, he couldn't deny that he felt some suspicion towards Armin; It wasn't everyday that a soldier would refuse the infirmary if they smelled and looked pretty terrible.

After he passed the next few corridors, the blonde found himself standing in front of the door to the restroom. By now, the injection was starting to get to him again; He felt his blood fume in the veins they glided through, his whole body covered in a thin layer of sweat. Why this was happening, he didn't know, but what he _did _know was that he wasn't exactly 'poisoned'. Well, he wasn't poisoned from something he's read about in the library. Reaching for the doorknob, he immediately withdrew his hand as if he had been burned, a low hiss of disapproval leaving his lips. He felt a rather nasty throb at the base of his forehead, immediately sending flashes of light before his eyes.

_'God damn it... ow... why aren't I dead yet? Shit... I should just go to the infirmary...'_

However, despite his thoughts of dropping himself into the infirmary, his body said otherwise. His hand made for the door knob anyways and turned it, letting himself inside and carelessly slamming the door behind him. He stumbled towards the sinks and bent over it, resting his head upon the cold surface. It felt soothing against his burning forehead; So he did have a fever. Armin coughed in agony and looked up from the sink and to the mirror, using his forearm to support himself. His image looked terrible; A bruise was starting to emerge at the point where Annie had kicked him, and his face was dangerously pale.

This started to scare Armin for a bit. Panting softly, his head immediately flushed into feathers, causing his legs to tremble dangerously on the spot. For some reason, tears started to leak from the corners of his eyes; He remembered Annie's cruel words... but were they true? Was he really the reason why Eren nearly died? Was he the reason why all those soldiers died? A pained sob left his chapped lips as he rested his head on his arm to weep. After a couple of seconds, he lifted his head up for a bit, only to have something catch his eye with a rather bright glint. His eyes immediately flickered towards the object. He saw that it was a used razor, left by a careless soldier who recently shaved.

_'Disgusting sons of bitches... would it kill you to clean up for once?'_

Without a second thought, he absentmindedly reached for the razor and gripped. Its handle felt warm against his skin; It was used recently. This brought a slight tingle of disgust in the pit of his stomach, and instead of dropping back onto the counter, he turned on the water and rinsed it. The hairs that were left on it washed away with the cold water, leaving the razor looking brand new in the process. Despite his distractions, he still sniffled softly as he wept, the cool water running over his hand only bringing a tiny spark of comfort in him.

_'Eren, what am I to you?'_

Turning the water off with a soft squeak of the knob, he stood up correctly and stared at the razor in his hand. It gave another bright glint, only earning a mild blink of interest from Armin. He didn't feel like moving anymore... he didn't want to do _anything_ anymore. A sharp outtake of air left his lips as he crumpled back onto the counter, allowing himself to cry freely once more. The razor mildly grazed his cheek as he buried his head back into his arm, leaving a very thin cut over his skin. The sudden prick made him jump; He dropped the razor onto the counter and ran a finger along the cut on his cheek, his eyes widening as he felt a warm liquid cover the pad of his finger.

_'That didn't hurt too much, did it? I wonder..."_

Taking the razor in his uninjured hand, he swiped it over his cheek once more, yet this time it made a deeper cut next to the previous one. He laughed softly at the minor pain; For some reason, the pain actually felt _good _to him. Not the pain in his heart, the pain on his cheek. It washed his heartbreak away... the heartbreak caused by both Eren and Annie.

_'Why did you lie to me for so long? You told me you loved me... you told me I wasn't a burden to you. To everyone here, actually. Why do you keep lying to me?'_

He unburied his injured arm and wrist from his coat and brought it up to the counter, hissing in disapproval as the sudden pressure on his broken wrist sent a prickling sensation of pain down his spine. He didn't know what he was doing anymore; It felt as if his body was acting on its own accord. Giving the razor one last hopeful look, he pulled up his sleeve and brought it to his wrist, bracing himself for what was to come.

_'I love you so much, Eren. I love you. I love you so, so much. But doing this would just be me throwing the love you showed me back into your face, wouldn't it? I want that. I want you to feel the pain I feel right now,'_

As he quickly ran the razor's blade across his wrist, he gasped in very minor pain. He didn't apply enough strength to actually make a deep enough cut that would bleed freely. Only small droplets of blood emerged on the lips of the thin wound, and that made even more tears leave Armin's eyes and splash onto the counter.

_'This proves that I'm weak. No matter what I do, I'll always let you down. Why do you lie to me so much? All those years I've cared for you, masquerading as your best friend in fear that you'd leave me once I revealed my true sexuality... none of that matters anymore, does it?'_

Without a care in the world, he ran the blade across the skin right under the last cut, but this time he brought up all the strength he could get in his tiny frame. Hissing in pain and discomfort, blood spurted freely from the wound and dripped down the sides of his wrist, staining the white counter. The pain he got from his wrist washed over the pain in his heart... it started to feel good, in a weird sense. It made him forget the heartbreak... for a short amount of time. He couldn't control himself anymore; Using most of the strength he had left, he dug the blade into his wrist again, cut after cut, as deep as the razor can get.

_'It hurts,'_

Blood poured freely from each wound, dripping onto the counter and staining his sleeve as it started to drop back down onto his forearm. He found himself crying harder than ever before; Loud sobs left his lips, the tears falling onto his wounds and mixing in with the blood. His virtuous tears, being tainted with his own blood. It was madness. Pure madness.

_'It hurts,'_

By the time he covered his forearm with a very thin, silky layer of blood, he slipped his arm off the counter and allowed it to lay useless at his side, staining the side of his coat with his own blood. Velvet drops slithered out of the wounds and slid down to his fingertips, escaping off into the cold air and meeting the ground. Drip after drip. Armin sniffled furiously and wiped the tears away from his eyes, giving a fearful look to what he did to his arm.

_'It hurts... it hurts...'_

Clenching his eyes shut, he grabbed the razor and shoved the handle into his mouth, ignoring the sweet taste of his blood on it. He brought his wrist up to his mouth and carelessly ran the blade over his skin with the strength he could muster up with his teeth and neck. Sharp, tingling sensations tumbled down his good arm and into his own heart, easing the pain there but taking his blood for toll. The warm substance that escaped his wounds managed to drop onto his lip, the bittersweet taste lingering on his taste buds.

_'Why... am I...?... It hurts,'_

Since his sleeve was carelessly shoved down to his elbow, the blood had already poured over it, staining it along with his thick tears. It became harder to breathe with the razor in his mouth and his nose being extremely stuffy. A strangled whimper left his mouth as he embedded one last wound into his forearm, the overall pain finally getting to him.

Dropping the razor from his teeth, he shrieked, "Eren, it hurts!"

As he heard the sharp 'tink' of the razor falling to the earth, he let out another loud whimper of pain; A whimper that signaled the pain in his wrists and the pain in his heart. Panting heavily, he took a couple of steps back to distance himself from the counter, sinking down to his knees and falling onto his side. His head smacked onto the floor, earning one last mewl before losing consciousness.

There, Armin lay, covered in blood, fear, and bittersweet pain.

**o0o0o0o**

As Eren hastened towards the library, he ran into Mike. It was a miracle that he managed to sidestep him just in time so they wouldn't collide, but Mike payed no mind to this at all.

"What's wrong, Jaeger?" the man asked.

"Nothing, sir," Eren smiled, "I'm just looking for Armin. I forgot to give him his Christmas present, you see,"

"Ah," Mike nodded and looked behind him. "I saw him not too long ago -" he scrunched his nose as if he had sniffed something disgusting, "- and he smelled terrible, I'll tell you that. He said he was going to he restroom. If he's still there, take him to the infirmary; I think he's running a fever. His face looked really pale, and he was drenched in sweat. I could have sniffed him out from a mile away,"

Eren bit his lip as he replied, "Yes, if he's not feeling well, I'll take him there. Are you sure he's still there?"

"Beats me. I wouldn't be surprised if he's coughing up his insides into the toilets right now," Mike laughed. "By the way, have you seen Nanaba? She was supposed to attend a meeting earlier today, but I couldn't catch her,"

"No, sir. Maybe she's in her dorm?"

He grinned and said, "I highly doubt that,"

The brunette grew impatient with him and stepped to the side a bit so he could walk past him. Mike sniffed softly and took this gesture to walk away as well. He thought that Eren was probably concerned about his friend being sick, so there was no reason to keep him there any longer.

"I'll see you later, Jaeger,"

"- See you,"

**o0o0o0o**

A frantic knock was heard on Levi's door. He grunted softly as he stretched for a bit, finally looking up from his paperwork. Levi glanced at the clock above him and watched as it struck 10:45 in the morning. Who would be visiting him at such an early time (or at least he considered it early for a holiday)? He murmured his approval to enter and stretched out his cramped hand, wincing softly as his door creaked open. Some part of him expected it to be Erwin, which brought a soft shiver down his spine. As reluctant as he was towards that relationship, he couldn't deny that he was starting to let his guard down with the affection he had towards Erwin.

To Levi's disappointment, it wasn't him; Instead, it was Mike, looking even more stressed out that usual. Mike invited himself to a chair in front of the raven and smacked his hand onto the hard surface of the desk to gain his attention. Levi growled at this and looked up from his paperwork, giving him a reproachful stare. As much as he respected Mike and loved working beside him, the little shit still had no right to do that to him.

"What do you want?" the raven asked with a rather bitter tone in his voice.

"I'm sorry about that," Mike laughed awkwardly, "I was a little too panicky for a second there. You see, I ran into Nanaba on the way here, and..."

He hesitated for a moment before continuing, "... apparently, Lynne found the Commander at the stables..."

Levi let out an impatient 'tch' and looked back down at his paperwork, saying, "How does Erwin tending to the horses concern me?"

Mike shifted uneasily in his seat. "Sir, it's scary to think that someone as strong as Erwin... would be found beaten and unconscious..."

The scratching of his quill instantly stopped. This couldn't possibly be... Erwin? Levi looked up from his paperwork and glared at Mike with a pleading look. A look that basically said, _'tell me you're kidding.' _He shook his head at the sight of Levi's slightly widened eyes and turned away. The raven felt his heart clench tightly in both pain and fear.

"We're not sure how it happened, but Nanaba's starting to panic. She's thinking Lynne did that to Erwin, but really... how could someone as fragile as Lynne possibly do any damage to him? It couldn't have been a woman,"

"Don't act like some sexist bastard, Mike, you're better than that," the raven growled.

"It's only true. Think of it; Besides Ackerman and Leonhart, who else do you think can actually do that to the commander? It couldn't have been only one person, either... I'm actually surprised,"

Levi stood up from his seat and spat in anger, "You treat this like an everyday thing! Where the fuck is he?!"

"Calm down, Levi! Now's not the time to panic,"

"I asked you: Where the _fuck _is Erwin?" the raven rasped coldly, carelessly pushing his seat away and walking towards the exit. Mike flinched softly at this. "All I want to do now is see him. Is that too much to ask?"

"You're really scary when you want to be, you know that?" Mike laughed, and he too stood from his seat. "He's in the infirmary right now. I'm not quite sure what happened, but we'll talk to him when he wakes up,"

Levi rolled his eyes. "I'd rather talk to him alone,"

"Why is that?" he asked 'innocently.'

"Wouldn't you want to make sure that the person precious to you was all right after being found 'beaten' and unconscious?" the raven muttered, "Especially if it was the person that saved you from hell a couple of years back?"

"I didn't know you two went back so far,"

He followed Mike out the door and walked with him towards the infirmary, ignoring the mischievous grin on the man's face.

"Our history is blurry, but readable,"

**o0o0o0o**

Soon enough, Eren found his way to one of the restrooms. There were multiple restrooms around the large castle, so he wouldn't be surprised if he didn't find Armin in there. More importantly, why was Armin sick all of the sudden? According to Mike, he was covered in sweat and had a very pale face. It wasn't an everyday thing to see him sick, since he was a rather tidy person. Despite the fact that he was a fragile being, he never did catch a cold or fever very often. It seemed foreign to Eren, and it agonized him all the more. He should be there by Armin's sickbed, caring for him, showing his affection towards him.

He already felt terrible enough as it is, so he shouldn't be beating himself up for what happened earlier, but he just couldn't help it. Hell, it wasn't entirely his fault, it was a mistake. Mistakes always happen, and some are taken lightly while others are taken heavily, like Armin did. Remorse clawed at his aching heart, but now was the time to repent for that sin. Looking down at the book, he scanned the front and admired the golden letters embroidered onto it; Despite the leather being torn, scratched, and dirty, he was grateful that the pages inside were all suitable to read (he actually went over it before Christmas to make sure it was all right).

Gripping the door knob, he turned it and wrenched it open, hoping that he'd find Armin in there. He didn't hear anything but the soft 'tink' of liquid hitting the tiled floors every now and then. Besides that,nothing – not a sound. Some part of him died inside when he strained his ears for something, anything. If Armin was sick, he'd be coughing up a lung, or he would of said something by now. Eren didn't bother closing the door behind him; Instead, he tucked the book into the depths of his coat and walked further into the restroom, turning the corner to face the stalls and sink. As soon as he did this, he stopped immediately in his tracks.

Blood stained the usually spotless white counter.

The bittersweet smell of iron and sweat filled the air; Eren's eyes widened in both fear and shock as the image before him bore into his soul. The counter was covered in blood, a small drop or two dripping (very slowly) off the side, and even the floor was stained in someone's blood. The warm substance itself was a lovely shade of rose, a deep violet at some points every here and there; The blood of an untainted soul. Gentle... prepossessing. Why... was there blood everywhere...? Amongst the scene itself was the body laying in the middle of that whole mess. Eren's heart tightened painfully and refused to beat for a moment or two.

After a couple of hesitant moments, he identified the soldier on the ground to be... Armin. He lay unconscious on the floor, his face extremely pale with the unusual sprinkle of scarlet every here and there. He wore a pained expression on his face, as if he had been in severe pain, both internally and externally. Eren took a sharp intake of breath as he neared the blonde's body, soon finding it much harder to contain his tears. All this blood... had been from Armin. The amount of blood spilled wasn't enough to actually kill a person... but it was enough to send them to infirmary for a good week or two.

_'I'm so sorry...'_

He painfully forced himself to examine Armin closer; He saw the salty tears in his eyes. They took refuge at the roots of his eyelashes, glittering brightly despite the limited amount of light coming from the dull sunlight coming in through the opened window above them. Eren's eyes watered significantly; Armin was crying. He was hurt, in severe pain... why wasn't he there to help him? A rather bright glint in the corner of his eye caught his attention. As his eyes swiveled to that point, he saw that it was a blunt razor, covered in blood and teeth marks.

_'Did... you... do this... to yourself?'_

Eren exhaled loudly and clapped a hand over his mouth. The sleeves of Armin's coat had been a dark shade of velvet, only meaning that he _had _done this to himself. Deep cuts in his forearms, no doubt. Why wasn't he there to stop him? Why didn't he do anything to prevent Armin from doing something rash? A muffled rasp was heard from the palm of his hand as his vision blurred with the amount of tears building in the corners of his eyes, threatening to leak out at any moment. He couldn't bring himself to look away from this, in fear that he'd only see more blood. More of Armin's virtuous blood.

_'Armin... quit playing with me. You're only messing around, right? Please... get up and laugh at me for being a dumb ass, tell me that this is a joke,'_

Nothing happened.

_'Armin, come on... quit fucking toying with me already...'_

He let out another husky sigh as he scanned one of Armin's outstretched arms. Beyond the end of his sleeve, an oozing cut or two was visible just below his wrist. What was worse of all was that the wrist he was looking at now... it was bent in a rather nasty position. His wrist was broken... why did this happen? Seeing this completely got to him.

_'Armin? Armin, get up! Armin,'_

He felt tears leak out of his eyes, breathing heavily from his nose since his hand was placed tightly over his mouth. Backing away slowly, he felt his heart burn painfully.

_'… Armin!'_

As soon as he stumbled out of the restroom, he fell backwards onto his rear just over the threshold, furiously wiping the tears away from his eyes. He only sat there, watching Armin's limp body as if he was to jump up and surprise him. However, despite his hopes and wishes that something like that would happen, nothing occurred. Nothing moved.

Until he saw Armin twitch softly.

… This broke him.

It actually scared him.

His voice echoed throughout the hallway.

"... _ARMIN!"_


	21. XXI: Brutal

**Note:** Well, damn, sorry about that. I had to do it. It wasn't Eren's fault, but hey, Armin doesn't know that. Sucks to be him right now, huh? The blondes are being eliminated, all that's left is Annie and Reiner (world domination! Who would win?). Heh, that'd be a fun chapter to write. I'm taking this fanfiction a bit more seriously than I originally intended to, and fun fact: I started the fanfiction telling myself that it'd end by chapter 20. Yeah, that didn't turn out as planned, hm? A good 66k in 20 chapters... I'm not sure if that's something to be proud of or not. This is also the last chapter that takes place on Christmas, but I was thinking; What would have happened if those last 6 or 7 chapters were put together in 1? Like damn, it's the same day, right? Ah, it sucks, I'm too lazy to do that. The 'next' button isn't too hard to press, is it? If you hadn't noticed, I usually end my chapters after 2 - 4 parts (each part is seperated by **o0o0o0o**). I'm not one to have chapters that last for god damn ever, I like to keep it spaced out. Yes, they need their space! I also plan on adding much more Eremin fluff/romance and a bit of Eruri every here and there, hope you don't mind. Don't think that things are going to calm down from here, though. It may be a poofy unicorn and sparkle part/chapter every here and there, but at the end of the day, the overall plot has to have its climax and die down to the ending. I'm not sure how many chapters there's going to be from here, though... fuck limits. Enjoy.

* * *

_**XXI: Brutal**_

Eren didn't know how long it took for someone to actually find him, but he didn't care; He was completely oblivious to everything around him. The howls of wind outside, the rustling of curtains – he heard none of that. The only thing that rang in his ears was the sound of his own heart beating rapidly, the usual gasp or two leaving his lips every now and then. After what felt like hours, or even days, the sudden frantic shuffling of footsteps near him snapped him out of the trance he was captured in. His head immediately jerked towards the direction of the footsteps, only to see that it was Hanji and two other soldiers.

"Eren, are you okay? What happened here?" Hanji asked frantically, taking the brunette's hands in hers and helping him up to his feet.

Eren shook his head and muttered, "The restroom... Armin... I can't believe it,"

"You two -" she nodded at the two soldiers behind her, who immediately saluted at being addressed, "- Check the restrooms, tell me if you find anything,"

"Yes, Squad Leader!" they piped in unison.

As the two soldiers scurried over the threshold, Hanji let go of Eren's hands and gave him a questioning look. She could see tears still built up in the corners of his eyes, only making her yearn to know more about the situation. Eren shook his head again, only to look back at the scratched restroom door in disbelief. It's impossible to think Armin would actually do that to himself, and it was taking Eren quit some time to accept reality.

She nudged him softly on the shoulder, "I asked you before, what happened here?"

The brunette stared at Hanji in disbelief. Was she merely trying to mock him, or was she really taking this seriously? It was rare to find her taking a situation so seriously, so he naturally thought it was a prank. However, the stern look she had on her face said otherwise. Eren hesitantly bit his lip and shuffled his feet. As he opened his mouth to respond, he was immediately interrupted by one of the soldiers that creaked the door open and stepped outside. He wore a concerned look on his face.

"Squad leader Hanji? We found a soldier here. We're not quite sure what happened, ourselves -" he turned his head towards his comrade, who walked out carrying Armin in his arms, "- but the only 'weapon' we found was a razor,"

Hanji's eyes sunk deeper into darkness as she scanned Armin. He was being cradled like a baby in the soldier's arms (he was small enough), his face hidden within the others chest – as if he was sleeping like any other small child would. Being cradled in his mother's arms, sleeping soundly, leaving his parents enraptured with the peaceful look he wears on his face when he's asleep. If only he had been at peace... enjoying his time on Christmas like any other soldier, not harming himself to his will's extent or dealing with bullshit (Eren's heart gave a rather nasty throb at the thought of that).

"Henning, why the hell are you holding him like that? He can't support himself in the state he's in, moving him may cause more damage,"

"I'm sorry," he apologized frantically, giving a pleading look for help towards his comrade.

"You're already carrying him in your arms, might as well take him to the infirmary," Hanji continued, "Gelgar, did you make sure he's all right? Is he still breathing? Anything broken?"

"Yes, he's still breathing, but it's shallow," Gelgar reported, "His wrist isn't looking too well, nor are his forearms, but that's the furthest we've investigated,"

Henning shifted Armin in his arms for a bit. "He's not feeling so cool, either. His forehead's on fire. I'm wondering why the little guy didn't go to the infirmary yet,"

"Take him up to the infirmary -" she tugged on Eren's sleeve, gaining his attention, "we need to get him treated right away. Eren, you're going to stay behind with me for a bit, I'd like to talk to you for a moment,"

Eren opened his mouth to protest. "Hanji-"

"- It's not that I don't want you to support Armin while he's resting on his sickbed," Hanji immediately cut in, "and I won't be keeping you here for long. There's just something we need to talk about right now, and it's better we have that conversation sooner rather than later,"

With the glint of the eye, Henning and Gelgar were excused from the scene. Eren watched as they marched towards the infirmary, feeling a slight pinch of remorse in the pit of his stomach. He should be the one carrying Armin, not them. He should be the one caring for Armin, taking him to the infirmary and showering him with butterfly kisses once he awoke. He couldn't deny that it hurt. His thoughts were immediately cut short as Hanji tugged on his sleeve again.

"Eren, now's not the time to be worrying about your best friend -" she received a reproachful glare from the brunette, "- It's not that I don't care. I really do, but right now, we have much more to discuss. Armin wouldn't be the only one that was attacked today, and even if those wounds on his forearms were his own doing, what would possibly make him do such a thing?"

Eren bit his lip, this time leaving small teeth marks on his bottom lip as the skin threatened to tear. Hanji saw this and gave a warm smile, placing a soothing hand on his shoulder.

"Armin's a strong person, I know he is. He couldn't have done this on his own. You may never know, someone could have manipulated him, or even forced him. It's unlikely, but someone may be part of this,"

"Why do you sound so confident?" Eren absentmindedly asked.

"Ooh, that almost hurt!" Hanji pouted. "Show some manners! But... to answer your question, if Armin really was attacked in any way today, it couldn't have been by the same people that attacked Erwin. In other words, there's more than two people,"

The brunette looked up at Hanji through widened eyes.

"We found Erwin at the stables not too long ago,but we're not sure how long he was there. It was a soldier that found him in the stables, and _hell_ did his nose look disgusting,"

"Hanji..." he breathed. "I... I can't believe it,"

"We have no idea who it was, but we're going to ask Erwin as soon as he wakes up," Hanji chuckled softly before continuing, "I'm not even sure if he'll remember too much by the time he regains consciousness. I don't know if his attackers were aiming to kill, but they were certainly careless. Lynne was frantic when she found her superior like that, though; She keeps apologizing over and over, she sounds like a broken record player!"

"Lynne?" Eren asked with a raised eyebrow.

"She's an older soldier in the Survey Corps," Hanji answered. "She drops into my squad every now and then. Mike's pretty intimidating, with his height and all. I'm pretty sure that's why Lynne's freaked out right now, or at least that's part of the reason,"

"Who... No, _why _is this happening? More importantly, who's behind it all?"

Hanji huffed softly before replying, "I'm not quite sure, myself. All we need to do is hope for the best for Armin and Erwin. If they remember who attacked them, life will be just peachy. You don't find the Commander unconscious with his nose cracked like a carrot, and it's not everyday that someone would self-harm for no reason. Not that he has a reason?"

Eren shuffled his feet in guilt. "Hanji... I don't think getting Heichou drunk was a smart idea..."

As soon as he said this, she squealed like a small animal. "Ooh! What happened – what did he do?! I should have stayed!"

"Hanji," he warned.

Letting out another laugh, she folded her arms and started walking down the hallway. "I'm only joking, Eren! If something happened between you and Levi, might as well talk to him about it now, right? He may be able to fix it for you,"

"How so?" the brunette asked with a rather doubtful tone in his voice, walking alongside Hanji towards the infirmary. "I don't think he'll care,"

"Wow, Eren... do you really think Levi's that heartless? I've known him way longer than you have, and I'll tell you right now, he feels remorse like any other man. If you talk to him about whatever happened, he may just swallow his pride and say 'sorry' to you. Or Armin, whatever the case may be for you two,"

He merely nodded.

"Don't tell me you don't trust his human nature!" Hanji exclaimed.

Eren looked at Hanji and forced a smile on his lips. "I'd trust him with my life,"

**o0o0o0o**

Erwin's eyes slowly opened, the world before him blurry and scrambled. It took some time for his eyes to come into focus, but as soon as it did, he still had no idea where he was. Everything seemed just so foreign to him at the moment. It wasn't until he rubbed his eyes and processed the image in his mind; He was in the infirmary. He scanned the room, seeing that he was the only one there at the moment. The rest of the beds were empty – spotless. As the fact that he had been taken to the infirmary sunk into his mind, he felt a rather nasty throb on the bridge of his nose, hissing in disapproval. His hand instinctively made its way to his nose to massage, but that was a mistake. His nose had been broken, and there was a bandage over it.

He remembered clearly what happened before he knocked out; Reiner and Bertolt. The attack itself could have been meant to kill, but for some reason, he lived. Was it just luck that smiled upon him at that instant? Or was it that Reiner was holding back a bit since it was his superior at his feet? He shifted a bit in his bed, feeling the sudden prickle of pain in his right arm. Eyes swiveling towards the point of this minor pain, he saw that his arm was bound in a cast. For some reason, his arm was numb; He couldn't feel it at all, and he wasn't too sure if it was because of the pain, weather, or a medication that was taking its sweet toll. As he grunted softly in discomfort and shifted his position for a bit, he heard a knock on the door.

Before he had the chance to even let out the slightest noise to allow the person to come in, the door immediately flung open. At the door stood Mike and Levi, and Erwin couldn't deny that he found the major height difference quite amusing. Levi hastened into the room while Mike cleared his throat for a bit.

"Commander, get some rest. I'm surprised you're even awake right now," he smiled. "I'm going to find Lynne... I'm not sure where she is right now,"

As soon as he closed the door, Levi rushed to Erwin's side, planting a lazy kiss on his lips. The blonde huffed softly in a silent laugh as Levi pulled away from the kiss, immediately blushing in embarrassment.

"What's wrong?" Erwin grinned cheekily.

Levi folded his arms and threw a glare at the blonde. "Don't act stupid, you jack ass. You go to the stables and here you are, in the infirmary like the fuck you are,"

"That's harsh," he pouted.

"Hmph!" the raven turned his head the other way and continued, "You worry the hell out of me, you know that?"

Erwin couldn't help but laugh out loud. He reached out and gripped one of Levi's folded arms, pulling it out from its position and gripping his hand. Levi payed no mind to this at all and absentmindedly intertwined their fingers together. The blonde smiled warmly.

"I can't believe I got humanity's strongest soldier to say something like that. I'm quite flattered,"

Ignoring this last comment, he instantly withdrew his hand and looked around for a chair. The blonde still kept his hand outstretched, watching as Levi brought a chair to his side. As he took a seat in the wooden chair, he folded one leg over the other, growling softly as he eyed the blonde's hand. After a few hesitant seconds, he reluctantly took Erwin's hand in his, propping his free arm on his thigh and resting his head on one folded hand.

"... You're okay, though... right?" he muttered as they intertwined fingers once more.

The blonde buried his head deeper into the pillows and smirked. "'Course I am, I'm talking to you right now, no?"

"Don't be cheeky, asshole," Levi snapped, earning another breathy chuckle. "Tell me... do you remember anything from what happened before?"

Erwin sighed softly and answered, "Yes, I remember it quite clearly. Why do you ask?"

He felt Levi's hold tighten significantly.

"Why do you think I'm asking you? I want to find the asshole that did this to you and murder them with my bare hands,"

"Calm down, tiger" the blonde laughed, ignoring his sneer of disapproval. "Don't worry so much about it. I'm fine, but the most salient thing now is that nothing happened to you yet,"

He brought Levi's hand up to his mouth and planted a soft kiss, a faint blush scattering over the raven's cheeks. At that moment, the door swung open this more. Mike had returned, but this time, he brought a soldier with him. She stood at his side with an extremely pale face and frightened expression on her face. Levi merely huffed as he turned away from the two, immediately trying to withdraw his hand. Instead of letting go, Erwin tightened his hold, earning a low growl.

"The hell do you think you're doing?" he warned.

"What, are you embarrassed?" the blonde purred dangerously, ignoring the bitter scowl.

Mike tightened the grip he had on the door knob as he said, "Erwin, this is Lynne -" the soldier next to him instantly saluted, "- She was the one that found you and brought help,"

Erwin smiled warmly. "You have my thanks,"

Lynne's back straightened significantly. "Of course, sir!"

To Levi's surprise, both Mike and Lynne ignored the way Erwin was holding onto his hand. He eased up a bit, signaling that the blonde can loosen his grip.

Mike stepped back out of the doorway and said, "I'm going to go find Hanji. I recommend you talk to Lynne now,"

Lynne instantly blushed in embarrassment as she was left there with her superiors. She waited for further instruction.

"Well, what are you doing? It must be uncomfortable standing like that, find yourself a seat," Erwin shot a grin at her, slightly tilting his head in the direction of the extra chairs stacked in the corner of the infirmary.

After she has seated herself at Erwin's side, she instantly apologized, "Sir, I'm so sorry,"

"What is there to be sorry about? I trust you, Lynne, to the point where I know you'd never do something like this," the blonde replied quietly. "Where was I when you found me? Was I still in the stables?"

"Commander, I'm not trying to be rude, but do you not remember what happened when you first woke up?" she asked.

"Not quite,"

She bit her lip. "I was going to the stables to visit one of the mares that I took quite a liking to... but when I got there, I saw that Luna had gotten out of her stall somehow. When I found her outside the stables, I noticed that she was chewing on someone's cloak, who I soon found out was yours,"

Erwin took a deep breath. A small flash of a dark scene flickered before him; Blood, water, and footsteps. It was faint, but he scarcely remembered it, yet it was soon to fade from his mind. That cloth that he had been clutching to... that was his cloak. The teeth marks left on it was the work of Ilunabarra, which brought a soft tinge of disgust in the pit of his stomach.

"I'm not sure who it was, but the nosebleed you had was really heavy... the blood was still wet, so they must have left right before I arrived,"

"So you didn't see who it was?" the blonde murmured.

He felt Levi's grip tighten around his hand as he fiercely rasped, "I thought you told me that you remembered who it was?"

"I thought I did... but honestly, now that I strain my memory, it's quite a blurry picture," Erwin immediately lied.

"You've got to be shitting me -" Levi's palm instantly met with his forehead, a small 'slap' ringing throughout the empty room. "- I swear to god, Erwin... you don't know how fucking _great _it feels to face defeat,"

"Heichou, there's still a chance you can find the people who did this -" Lynne shuffled uneasily in her seat as her eyes laid upon their intertwined fingers, a small smile finding its way to her lips, "- seeing that he means so much to you, I'm sure you'll be facing victory rather than defeat in the near future,"

"Are you done preaching to me, or is there more?" Levi retorted, earning a reproachful look from the blonde.

"My apologies, sir," she muttered. "Commander, do you -"

Her question was immediately interrupted as the door to the infirmary swung open once more. All three of them turned to see who it was. This time, however, it wasn't Mike visiting them again; It was Henning, and he held a rather shaky and bloodied body in his arms. Gelgar followed immediately behind him, leaving the door open as if he was expecting someone else to come in right after him. Henning laid the soldier in one of the spotless beds seated right next to the window at the corner of the room. Erwin's eyes widened as he saw the soldier's face – he couldn't believe it.

He looked over to Levi, being greeted with only a mild spark of surprise in his eyes. Lynne immediately stood from her seat and half ran to Henning, muttering something to him with a concerned look on her face. He glanced over to the doorway, and at that very moment, both Hanji and Eren walked into the room. As they entered, the blonde immediately withdrew his hand, allowing Levi to finally move away from the bed. Levi stood up from his seat and greeted Hanji with a sneer.

"Were you experimenting on Arlert, shit-glasses?" the raven scowled.

"As much as I'd like to, I'm going to have to say no," Hanji said cheerfully. "However -" her tone immediately darkened, "- instead of worrying about me trying to dissect Eren or Armin, you should be worrying about the Survey Corps. First Erwin, and now Armin – we're lost, Levi,"

He walked by Hanji's side towards Armin. "I know we're lost. Apparently, Erwin doesn't know who did it, either, and I'm not sure if Arlert will be seeing daylight again anytime soon,"

Levi saw that Eren was gripping onto the younger blonde's hand with both of his. His knuckles were somewhat whited, his eyes immediately overcome with worry. The raven smacked a hand on Eren's back, earning a soft hiss of minor pain.

"Hey brat, try not to break his hand, he's already broken enough as it is,"

"I'm sorry," Eren laughed softly, loosening the hold he had on Armin's hand.

"Levi... you don't think that some soldiers within the Survey Corps are doing this?" Hanji asked.

He shook his head vigorously. "Not now, Hanji, I don't want my headache to get worse,"

"You'd rather be by Erwin's side, loving him and acting as if we were living in a peaceful melody?" she snickered.

"Would it be considered a crime if I said yes?"

Levi turned back to face Erwin, only to see that he had knocked out. His uninjured arm hung over his injured one and off the bed; Apparently he had left his hand in the position it was in earlier when he held onto Levi. The raven sighed softly and took one last doubtful look at Armin, walking over to Erwin's side and sitting back down in his seat. Weaving their fingers together once more, he watched Erwin's chest rise and fall slowly with his peaceful breathing. He wouldn't blame the blonde for being tired after all that happened, but he also can't deny that he felt some sort of remorse for being more interested in Erwin than in his bleeding soldier.

"Squad Leader, should we inform Nanaba and Mike about this?" Gelgar asked.

"No, it's fine, they'll figure out sooner or later," she replied. "You two can go back to the barracks if you'd like, and you too, Lynne. Enjoy your Christmas, pay no mind to this,"

Henning folded his arms over his chest. "Shouldn't we be concerned about the fate of our comrades?"

"Lighten up a bit, will you?" Hanji gave a rather playful grin. "It's Christmas! Don't worry so much about it. But we're going to have a meeting with Nanaba later on this week, remember that, at the very least,"

"One hell of a Christmas," the brunette chuckled darkly.

They saluted to Hanji and left the infirmary, the door clicking rather loudly behind them. Besides Erwin's breathing and Armin's small whimpers, all was still and quiet in the room. Hanji crossed her arms and brought her thumb up to her lips, nibbling softly on the skin around her nail; She usually did this when she was thinking over a troubling subject. She gripped Eren's shoulder tightly, leaning down to mutter soothingly in his ear.

"Don't worry so much about him, Eren, he'll be all right. It's best if we let him rest for now. I'm sure a nurse is on their way here,"

Eren reluctantly let go of the blonde's hand and stood up from his seat. "Are you sure?"

As he asked Hanji that question, he heard footsteps from across the room. A nurse had appeared from the wooden door next to Erwin's bed, and hell, did the sudden entrance surprise him. He didn't hear anything, and nor did Hanji. She greeted the nurse with a smile.

"It's been awhile, hasn't it?" Hanji said, grabbing the brunette's arm and pulling him aside.

"Not a lot of people have been here since the 57th expedition," the nurse replied quietly.

While she tended to Armin's wounds, Hanji practically dragged Eren out of the room, ignoring the small protests on the way there. They left the room, leaving the nurse to quietly set to work and Levi to sit by Erwin's side until he awoke once more.

**o0o0o0o**

Mikasa was sat cross-legged on the ground, resting on one of the stone pillars. The sun was already starting to set, and the castle grounds were beautiful at this time. She nuzzled into the warm folds of her scarf, tightening her coat around herself. She stared off into the distance over the crowns of trees, the sun spilling its beautiful rays of scarlet and gold over the cloudy winter sky. A voice was heard behind her.

"Mikasa?"

She turned towards the person who called her name and saw that it was Hanji. "Squad Leader?"

Hanji sat down next to Mikasa before the stone pillar, crossing her legs and resting her head upon two folded hands. A casual position, and a rather foreign one for her superior to use. Mikasa pulled her scarf away from her nose and mouth so her words weren't muffled.

"Something I can help with?" she asked.

"I'm fully aware of the duty you have during twilight -" Hanji's voice immediately turned into a business-like tone, "- and I wanted to know if you saw anything strange lately,"

"Not at all," Mikasa replied quietly. "May I ask why?"

She turned her head towards the distant forests and pushed her glasses further up the bridge of her nose. "I'm not sure if you know this yet, but Eren found Armin in one of the restrooms -"

"- I'm relieved," Mikasa cut in.

"- That's not the point right now," Hanji said impatiently. "Erwin was recently ambushed by two or more people, and we're pretty sure it was a soldier within the Survey Corps that attacked him -" Mikasa's eyes narrowed dangerously, "- and we found Armin in the same position he was in, in a heap on the floor, spilling their own blood. Well, Erwin's nosebleed was child's play compared to Armin's wounds,"

"Is Eren with him at the moment?" the raven asked in a dangerous tone.

Hanji faced her once more and saw the treacherous spark of hate in her eyes. "Yeah, why?"

That spark immediately burned out.

"He's safe," Mikasa muttered, nuzzling into her scarf once more. "They'll be fine. I won't deny that there's a chance that Eren could get attacked as well, but... some part of me knows that he's safe,"

Hanji smiled softly. "You're something, Mikasa,"

**o0o0o0o**

_(Christmas Day, half past eleven; At night)_

"Ymir? Are you all right?"

Ymir and Krista were already back in the warmth of their dorm after a long day. They were getting their nightwear on, and while Krista was combing her hair in the mirror, Ymir had wrapped her arms around her. She set the comb down on the counter and turned her head towards Ymir to question her, instantly feeling soft lips press against her forehead.

"Have you heard of what happened to Armin and the Commander?" Ymir asked as she nuzzled into the blonde's soft hair.

"It spread like a wildfire," she muttered. "I feel so sorry for them... I may drop off a couple of flowers as a get-well present... maybe it'll cheer them up,"

"Don't I get any flowers?" Ymir pouted.

"You've much more than flowers,"

Ymir chuckled softly and planted another kiss on the top of her head. "You know... I'm starting to think that Reiner and Bertolt are behind this,"

Krista reached for the comb and stuffed it back into her drawer. "Yes, I won't deny that I'm thinking that as well,"

The brunette tightened her grip around Krista and leaned further in to peck her cheek. "I'm thinking of investigating this myself,"

"Don't worry me like that!" Krista protested, earning another kiss to her cheek.

She looked over her shoulder once more to face Ymir and saw the serious look she had on her face. "You're... not kidding, are you?"

"I'll be fine, Krista," Ymir said as she gingerly kissed the blonde's lips. "I'd never leave you here,"

Krista gave a warm smile and turned back to the mirror to continue grooming herself. "I'm glad that you won't leave me. It's hard to think how it'd be like here without you. I can't help but worry,"

The brunette let go of Krista and stood up correctly, her hands resting on her fragile shoulders. They stared into each others eyes in the dusty mirror, the unimpressed look on Ymir's face bringing a soft shiver down the blonde's spine. The grip Ymir had on her shoulders strengthened.

"However, if it really is them doing this, then I should compare my fate with the previous two..."

She let go of her shoulders.

"... It's almost brutal,"

* * *

**Extra Note: **Sorry for the late update, I got caught up on the way of life. The next chapter will have more Armin, I promise.


	22. XXII: Fever

**Note: **All holy hell, I think I'm being terrible to both Eren and Armin. This chapter focuses mainly on Eren/Armin, so life is good (I guess you can say that). They ... kind of 'make up' in this chapter... not really, but I'm getting some of the Eremin out of my system. Some Jean/Eren rivalry towards Armin coming your way, too. Chapter 22, you guys. I didn't think I'd be here right now. I'll be completely honest, by chapter 10 - 15, I was wondering why the fanfic wasn't named "Promises" or "Lock Your God Damn Door For Once." I'm surprised that you guys stayed with me until now c: Danke. [Insert kissy face here]. Inspiration is such a bitch... I can't seem to wrap my fingers around it for so long. I'm sorry If I update later than usual, but trust me, I have a lot more Eremin/Eruri for you guys. I'm going to try to readjust the focus on the romance in this fanfic starting this chapter... now that I look at it, it was more about the plot/actual story than it was the romance. I intended to make things fluffy and all, but I never really payed attention to it. Accept my apology? ;-; Crying.

I hope you enjoy this chapter.

There's also some Eren x Levi coming your way, so... yeah. Damn.

* * *

**_XXII: Fever_**

_(Three days later; Evening)_

Eren felt comfortable in the position he was in; Resting his head upon two folded arms, slouching in his chair, nodding off by Armin's side. After just three days, Erwin was excused from the infirmary, leaving Armin as the only patient there. However, throughout those three stressful days, Armin hadn't woken up yet. The nurses there told him that it would take a while for Armin to wake up again, and that the rest was necessary for him to recover. Sweet time was needed, though that was one of the very many things that the Survey Corps didn't have. Despite the mess they were in, Eren still spent his time beside his lover, praying that he'd be okay.

The room itself was quiet, the dull ticking of the clock above them and Armin's peaceful breathing being the only sounds around him. Armin lay on his back, sinking into the soft mattress, the blanket that was once wrapped around him pushed off to the side in a messy heap. He was left with his shirt neatly rolled up to his chest, a towel wet with cold water placed over his stomach. Another towel was placed on his forehead, small droplets of water dripping from the corners and trailing down the side of his face or into the roots of his hair. The nurse had left Eren in charge of changing the towels (he had insisted on doing so), but he made poor work of keeping it clean and organized.

What had caused the fever was unknown to any of the doctors or nurses there, though the recent weather was giving them some ideas. Despite the towel filled with cold water covering his forehead and stomach, his face was still painted scarlet, every inch of his skin being hot to the very touch. Every now and then he'd squeak softly or reposition himself to the side a bit, each time earning a hopeful look from Eren. However, after the first day, Eren started to consider his time next to Armin agonizing, and even _boring _at times. He considered it inhumane to say such a thing, especially since it was his lover, but he couldn't deny the truth. The steady tempo of the clock from above him was enough to make him doze off for a bit, though he snapped out of his trance as he felt Armin readjust himself for a bit.

Thinking that Armin was probably still asleep, he buried himself deeper within his arms, taking a deep breath from the warm atmosphere. Again, the soft sound of rustling sheets was heard. Was Armin having a nightmare? It was only a dream... it shouldn't matter so much to him. He didn't look up from his arms until he felt something weave into his hair, the warmth of it trailing down through the chocolate strands of hair. As his eyes slowly came into focus, he saw that Armin had sat up from his sickbed, and the towel that was on his forehead had already fell to his side. His rolled up shirt was slowly falling back down over his chest and onto his stomach, though the second towel refused to let it drop completely.

"Eren?"

The very sound of Armin's voice made his eyes widen in surprise. The blonde's face was still covered with an intense shade of scarlet; It would have resembled a hard blush if his eyes didn't look so pained. He watched as Armin yawned softly and furiously rub his eye with his uninjured hand, mewling softly in pain. Bandages covered the wounds that were left over his forearms, and seeing this made Armin bite his lip in embarrassment. His breath hitched as his fingers trailed over the bandages on his arm and broken wrist. Eren continued to stare, making Armin squirm a bit in his seat.

"Eren...? Why... ?! Eren!"

He gasped loudly as the brunette pounced on him, gently pinning him down to the bed. Armin felt small kisses all over his face; His forehead, eyelid, nose, chin – every inch of skin Eren can get to. Whining softly with discomfort, he weakly tried to push Eren away, though his attempt was in vain. He had hardly any strength left, and having his 'lover' kissing him in such a way infuriated him; Wasn't Eren cheating on him with Levi?

"Stop it – _Stop!"_

The blonde's hand found its way to his forehead and pushed him away. Eren felt his heart clench tightly in remorse as he regained his self control and unpinned him from the bed. Armin glared at him for a moment before trying to completely remove the brunette from the bed.

"Get off of me already -"

"- Armin, I'm sorry -"

"- No, I don't care -"

"- Armin!"

"- I said get off of me!"

Eren sat back down in his seat to face a fuming Armin. He tossed the two towels back at Eren and stubbornly folded his arms with a small 'hmph!' The brunette gripped the towels tightly between two fists, water gushing out of the fabric and dripping from between his fingers, his knuckles whited with frustration.

"Why aren't you with Heichou, hmm? Aren't I one son of a bitch?"

"Don't say that!" Eren growled. "What happened on Christmas wasn't real -"

Armin immediately cut him off with a sour laugh. "- you're saying that you kissing that bastard was fake?"

"No, that's not what I meant!" the brunette continued, "Hanji left me with him so I can try to take him back to his room. He was drunk, Armin, he didn't know what he was doing,"

"If that's true, why did you tell him that you loved him?" he fiercely shot back.

Eren was taken aback by this retort and spluttered, "W- What? That's bullshit! I never -"

Before he finished his sentence, he clicked his tongue impatiently; He remembered when he tried to explain to his superior what 'love' really was, and hell, was it embarrassing. Armin merely nodded and readjusted his shirt before hanging both of his legs off the side of the bed. As soon as he slipped off the bed and onto the floor, he immediately stumbled, letting out a soft groan of pain and smacking his hand onto his forehead. Eren stood up from his seat and reached a hand towards Armin.

"What do you think you're trying to do? You're running a fever, you shouldn't be up right now!"

Armin smacked his hand away and winced softly at the sudden prickle of pain from the wounds on his forearm. "D- Don't tell me- tell me how to live my l- life,"

"You can't even talk properly! Sit down!" Eren growled, hastening around the bed to the blonde's side. "You're scaring me right now, Armin, what's wrong with you?"

"Shut up," he muttered as he sidestepped Eren, only to uneasily stumble once more. "I- I'm.. I'm fine... I'm..."

He trailed off into a soft mutter, only pushing Eren further into panicking. Eren spun around and gripped the blonde by his waist, wrapping his arms around him. He closed the gap between them, earning a loud whine of protest. Armin's uninjured hand weakly slapped the arms that had snaked around his waist, demanding his release.

"L- Let go... let go of me..." Armin demanded as he continued to slap and pull on the brunette's arms.

"You're not leaving," Eren retorted.

"Where... where the h- hell... is the doctor...?"

Eren tightened his arms around the blonde. "He's out right now, same with the nurses! They left me here to take care of you, and there's no way I'm letting you leave with the fever you have. You can't even walk or talk without some troubles, and isn't the heat of the fever making you lightheaded?"

With his words caught at the back of his throat, Armin gripped the brunette's forearm and tried to pull away. He bent over Armin and rest his head on the blonde's fragile back, only to feel the sweat-drenched material stick to his forehead. This would of disgusted him if he wasn't caught in the heat of the moment.

"Armin – Armin, please, I'm so sorry,"

Armin started, "You're... you're not -" he slumped down to his knees and let go of Eren's forearm, "- why, Eren? Why...?"

Eren let go of his waist as he fell to the ground with Armin. Instead of fully removing his arms from the blonde, he wrapped them around his shoulders, embracing him tightly. He felt Armin shudder in his arms as he began to cry freely. The brunette rest his head on one of Armin's shoulders, immediately feeling the unbearable heat coming from his fever. His skin was covered in a layer of sweat, his face now being masked in thick tears.

"Armin, don't tear up on me now. Your eyes are beautiful, they shouldn't be hidden in your tears," Eren muttered gingerly into his shoulder.

He only sobbed harder. "I'm – I'm beautiful?"

"The most precious thing I've ever had in my life,"

"You … y- you don't love Heichou?" Armin asked as he shivered softly.

"No, of course I don't," Eren replied, "I never have and never will. He's my superior, and I'm his lowly solider, and it'll stay that way -" he leaned in a bit and planted a quick kiss to Armin's cheek, the salty taste of the blonde's tears lingering on his lips, "- Hanji got him drunk on Christmas, and I only volunteered to help him to his room. Things got really bad once I started to laugh at the sight of him. It was my mistake. Please, believe me when I say this -" he kissed the shell of Armin's ear and whispered, "- I love you, Armin,"

Armin let out a rather high-pitched sob before bowing his head in embarrassment, his hand finding its way to one of the hands Eren had on his shoulders. They swiftly weaved their fingers together, their hands locking together like puzzle pieces. A soft smile ripped across Eren's lips as he nuzzled into Armin's hair, only slightly tightening his grip on his lover's hand.

"I love you -" he kissed the nape of Armin's neck, "- and I'll always love you -" the brunette planted another kiss on his lover's shoulder, "- I'm so sorry, Armin. I promise I'll never hurt you again,"

Armin lifted his head once more and leaned back onto Eren, gradually letting his weight fall back onto the others lap and knees, "D- Don't... don't make a p- promise you can't..."

Eren unfolded his legs and stretched them out, pulling the blonde into his lap and tightening the embrace.

He leaned down and muttered softly into Armin's ear, "I only make promises that I'm sure I'll keep,"

With one final sob, Armin knocked out in Eren's arms, his head resting comfortably under Eren's chin. The brunette slightly swayed with Armin in his arms, the weight on his shoulders instantly lifting. He was enraptured with the peaceful look Armin wore on his face... he finally looked relieved. The brunette felt lighter, happier...

… He loves Armin, and right now, that was the only thing that mattered.

**o0o0o0o**

_(Fifth day; Evening.)_

Eren streaked through the hallways of the castle with swift footsteps, hardly a sound bouncing off the frigid walls. He had to attend duty in the morning along with a newer recruit, and by now he was bored to death. He left to the infirmary as soon as he was excused, not because he was injured, himself, but because he wanted to stick by his lover's side at a time in need. Armin's condition was still no better even after nearly a week. It started to worry him; Some part of him thought that Armin may not recover and die off like a starving dog begging for food in the crowded streets – worthless and meaningless.

By December thirtieth, no one has seen Reiner or Bertolt around the castle at all. Ymir hasn't been too bright around the time, either, and the fact that she was somewhat close to the two started to get most of the higher ranked soldiers and strategists suspicious. They would frequently ask Krista about Ymir, what Ymir's relation was to Reiner and Bertolt, if she knew where they were now. Krista, on the other hand, hardly knew anything that was happening between Reiner, Bertolt, and Ymir; She kept mostly to herself, though her attitude towards the soldiers around her was no different. She was still the cheerful 'goddess' most people knew and loved, though the fact that she could stay so cheerful at such a troubled time was quite foreign.

Thankfully, the cold weather wasn't getting any worse. By this point, it started to lighten up a bit. The weather was still pretty cold, but it no longer effect the interior of the castle itself. The corridors weren't as cold as before, but there was still the frequent chill or two that would run down one's spine. This brought a smile on Eren's face; The weather will soon be getting better, which meant that Armin's health may improve as well. Without the harsh winds and thick snow, life within the Survey Corps will gradually enlighten. Or at least they hoped. Eren yawned softly as he stuffed his hands into the inner pocket of his coat. His fingertips brushed over a smooth surface, with hardly a wrinkle despite the usual tear every here and there.

He still didn't have the chance to give Armin his Christmas present. The book was kept safe within the folds of his coat, and he eagerly thumbed the [only slightly] damaged spine of it every time Armin stirred. The blonde would be forced to wake up every now and then to take his medicine, go to the restroom, or eat. Besides that, it was rare that he actually woke up on his own. It pained Eren to sit by his side when the nurses were tending to his wounds and fever; A painful prickle was felt in the pit of his heart as he watched the nurses remove the bandages from his forearms to clean the wounds, applying ointment to the sensitive skin and wrapping new bandages tightly around him once more.

Eren was still left in charge of trying to keep the fever's temperature at bay, and by now he was starting to be a little more 'clean' about it. He made sure not a single drop of cold water left the tips of the cloth, and he even went through the trouble of folding it neatly on his forehead and stomach instead of hurriedly throwing it over the area. It brought him to shame once he realized how careless he was; Armin deserved much better than that. To him, it felt weird being in the infirmary by himself, either tending to his lover's illness or daydreaming at his side. His impatience was slowly getting the better of him, but on top of that was worry. A normal fever would have been gone by now.

As he wrapped his fingers around the cold doorknob, he saw someone's silhouette through the covered screen of the door. He analyzed it for a bit before concluding that it was just another nurse; Nothing worth his time. Walking through the door, he opened his mouth to greet the nurse, and instead of saying the usual 'hello', a sneer formed on his face. It wasn't a nurse that was tending to Armin this time.

"What the hell?"

It was Jean.

"What is it, Jaeger?" Jean scowled, watching as Eren carelessly slammed the door behind him. "What's got you in a sour mood? If you keep doing that, you'll wake him up,"

Eren rolled his eyes and made his way to Armin's side. "Why are _you_ here?"

"Ah, that kind of hurt," the taller male grinned. "When I got here, the little guy was twitching and mumbling something in his sleep -" he pointed a thumb to Armin's sickbed, "- It looks like you didn't replace the towels, so I did that for you. Hell, I even brought him some roses. Lovely, isn't it? I thought you would have known by now not to keep him covered with a blanket. That would only make his fever worse, dumb ass,"

"Listen here, horse shit," Eren snarled as he took a threatening step towards Jean. "Don't think you're all high and mighty now. Where have you been the past few days, hm? I actually spend my time with him, making sure that he's all right. Don't think that one little thing you did changes anything,"

"What's this now, Jaeger? Are you jealous that I just happen to have some common knowledge on how to treat a fever?"

Before he knew it, Eren had already thrown himself at Jean, hardly giving him a chance to breathe. Jean frustratingly ground his teeth as the brunette's fist grabbed a hold of the collar of his shirt. He was pushed backwards into the wall, now being 'cornered' by a fuming Eren.

"You fucking make me sick," Eren said through clenched teeth. "I'm tired of your shit, you horse-faced bastard,"

Jean clenched his fists, his knuckles almost instantly fading to white. "You want to go? Right here, next to your 'lover'? You're one hell of a boyfriend, aren't you?"

"You're right, I wouldn't want anything happening to my _boyfriend,_"

As soon as Eren finished his sentence, he tightened the hold he had on the taller male's collar and threw him onto the floor, as far away from Armin's sickbed as possible. Jean hissed in minor pain as he fell onto his back, instinctively trying to prop himself up on his elbows. The brunette was ahead of him, though; Eren pounced on Jean and forced him flat onto his back, bringing his fist above his head and swinging it back down in one swift movement. However, right before his knuckled came into contact with the taller male's eye, Jean instantly dodged the attack, his fist hitting to hard floor with a small 'crack'.

"You son of a bitch!" Eren growled, hissing loudly in pain.

Jean took this chance to attack, delivering a quick blow to the others cheek. Although the hit itself was not hard enough to actually deal a good amount of pain, it _was_ enough to allow him to push Eren off of his stomach. He didn't have the chance to switch positions; Eren had already recovered from having his fist collide with the hard earth, his eyes burning with hatred. They punched and kicked, delivering blow after sweet blow, though it was impossible to tell how long it took before they were pulled apart.

Eren felt himself being hauled off the floor by two of the nurses, the sweet taste of his own blood attacking his taste buds. His lip had been cut badly; gathering as much blood in his mouth from the wound as he could, he spit it at Jean's face, who was being held back by a doctor and his assistant. Despite being pulled away from each other, they still snarled dangerously, completely forgetting that Armin was asleep (or at least they hoped he was still asleep) in the room.

"I'll fucking murder you, bastard!"

"Just try me!"

"Fuck you!"

"Die in a fucking hole, Jaeger!"

The doctor threw Jean back onto the floor, ignoring the groan of pain.

"That's _enough_,"

Eren wasn't treated as heavily as Jean was (which brought a smirk on his face). The two nurses that were previously holding him down helped him to his feet, while the doctor's assistant examined Jean's black eye.

"Where are we, Eren?" the doctor huffed softly. "Eren Jaeger, is it? Glad I finally met you – acting like an immature brat that didn't get his way,"

"Sir!"

"Aren't you Grisha's son? He would've wanted you to act like a civilized person and present the Jaeger family proudly. Aren't you ashamed of what you've done? What would Grisha think?"

Eren shuffled his feet in embarrasment.

"If you're going to act this way in an infirmary, don't bother coming back again,"

Jean bit his lip to try to hold down his laugh. The doctor that was scolding Eren turned on him.

"And you – I don't even know who the hell you're supposed to be. We thought you were here to deliver your flowers and pay a small visit to your friend, not to fight with another soldier. Don't think you have the right to start something in an infirmary, especially while you're right next to a patient,"

"It wasn't even -!"

"- Act your age - _both of you!_"

With that said, he left the room with his assistant, leaving the two nurses to tend to their wounds (though Eren's Titan powers made his recovery easy, which earned him another scowl from Jean).

**o0o0o0o**

_'You'll be safe here – we're waiting for you,'_

_Armin let out a soft whimper of discomfort as he shifted around in his sheets."What are you waiting for?"_

_'For you,'_

_"Why?"_

_He reached up to his eyes and rubbed slowly, the world before him blurred once more. After a couple of fuzzy seconds, he saw that his wrist was no longer broken; His arms no longer wounded. He decided to test the waters and flexed his arms for a bit, twirling his previously broken wrist curiously. He felt nothing._

_The same voice repeated; 'You'll be safe here,'_

_"Safety?" Armin laughed softly as he looked to his side at the source of the voice. "What makes you think -" he sat up in his bed as his eyes rest upon Eren, "- that we'll ever be safe in this world?"_

_Eren pouted. 'You're saying you don't trust in me?'_

_"Believe in my human nature,"_

_The brunette nodded vigorously. 'Mhm, my apologies,'_

_"Say, Eren... Have I ever let you down before?" Armin asked as he left his bed and stretched his legs. "Do you... Do you believe in me?"_

_'Would it be a crime to say no?'_

_Armin's eyes drooped with sadness as he looked down at his feet. "I trust you,"_

_'Your trust is of no concern to me,'_

_He looked back up at Eren, who was already at the other side of the room. The room they were in – it was no longer an infirmary. It was pure darkness, and nothing was visible within it. The only thing that illuminated the room were him and Eren, the only two living souls there. Armin hesitantly walked towards Eren, his heart racing with life and excitement. Living... it felt good to live. No, it felt good to love. He was in love._

_"Love... love... love," Armin muttered softly as he picked up his pace._

_He enjoyed the way the word 'love' rolled off his tongue. It sounded beautiful – it sounded like the lyrics to a song, being sung in one swift melody, the pitches transitioning high to low with no hesitation at all. It was like two waves, coming together and circling in a graceful dance. There was no hesitation whatsoever... nothing to make you think otherwise... nothing to push remorse into the depths of your heart._

_"Love," the blonde giggled softly._

_Eren's voice echoed throughout the room. 'I love you,'_

_Armin felt his heart clench tightly in excitement. "I love you too,"_

_His eyes came into focus; He saw that Eren wasn't talking to him. He wasn't even trying to make eye contact with the blonde – He was preoccupied with another person. Eren had his arms folded at his chest as he casually leaned against the wall behind him, which had been swallowed by darkness along with everything else in the room besides them, his head turned to the side and away from Armin. The blonde picked up his pace, but it took a moment or two to see that he was progressing nowhere. He wasn't moving a centimeter; No matter how many steps he took, he stayed in the same spot. Why...?_

_'I love you too,'_

_The person who had replied to Eren was Levi – he wore the same expressionless face, though his eyes had an unusual spark of interest in them. Armin felt himself come to an abrupt stop (not that he was moving, anyways). He watched as Levi's hands skillfully slithered up the brunette's stomach and onto his wrists, almost lovingly pulling them apart and away from his chest. Eren instantly ran both of his hands along Levi's arms, snaking their way under his arms and lifting him with ease. His legs immediately wrapped around Eren's waist to support himself, bringing them much too close for Armin's comfort._

_"Eren... what are you doing...?"_

_He watched through widened eyes, feeling his face burn uncomfortably as tears welled up in the corners of his eyes; As Levi laced his arms around the brunette's neck, Eren roughly took his cravat in one of his hands, the smooth fabric immediately ruffling into the curves of his fist. Their lips fit together like puzzle pieces as he [none-too-gently] pulled Levi into a kiss. His other hand trailed down the raven's stomach onto his pant line, his index finger hooking into his shirt from the small gap between two buttons and swiftly pulling his tucked dress shirt up to his chest to reveal his smooth skin. Their lips moved on their own accord, small sucking noises issuing from the two as their kiss gradually increased to a much more heated degree._

_Armin fell to his knees as he hoarsely whispered, "Stop it... you... you said you didn't love him... Why are you...?"_

_He heard a strangled moan issue from the back of Levi's throat as Eren's hand curiously tweaked one of his nipples. He continued to pinch and pull on the raven's nipple, gladly swallowing each moan that attempted to leave his bruised lips. Eren's hand released the raven's cravat, slithering down his pale stomach and gripping his thigh. The small sucking noises coming from them gradually got louder; Armin felt a tear leave the corner of his eye as he saw Eren part with Levi's lips, only to reveal their tongues skillfully dancing together. The brunette sucked aggressively on Levi's tongue, giving a rather rough pull to one of his nipples in the process._

_Levi broke away from the kiss and moaned, 'Eren!'_

_As Armin heard this, the tears that built up in the corners of his eyes finally broke free from its restraints and glided down his cheeks. He cried freely, without a care in the world what sound his mouth made. Rather high-pitched sobs left his lips as he slumped onto his side and weaved his fingers through his own hair, gradually curling into a fetal position. Giving a rather rough pull to the blonde locks, he cried much harder, his heart shattering into pieces. All those times that Eren said his 'I love yous'... all those times Eren kissed him sweetly on the lips, read with him in the mornings, cuddled with him at night... all of that was a lie? This whole time, their relationship was living off a bitter lie?_

_He felt someone grip onto his shoulder. With a shaky gasp, he reluctantly let go of his hair and unburied his head from his arms. His head burned almost painfully as he wiped the tears away, the world slowly coming into focus before him. A familiar face hovered above him, one that wore an unimpressed look on its face. He instantly recognized it; That face... belonged to his grandfather. He instantly reached a hand out to his grandfather, the man who had comforted him, raised him, cared for him – yet in the end he only received an aggressive slap to the hand that had reached out towards him._

_'Have you ever wondered why your parents dumped you in my arms? Have you ever wondered how much it pained me to have such a weak grandson like you?'_

_Armin's voice cracked; "G – Grand... father...?"_

_He pointed to the blonde's arms; Armin gave a high pitched mewl as he saw that his forearms were covered with wounds, warm blood pouring freely out of them, his wrist bent in a rather disgusting angle. It pained him to see it; His blood was tainted black, dying his clothes the impure color of Death. His grandfather straightened his back and gave Armin a sour look – a look that signaled pure hatred and disgust._

_'That day that I left with the others to fight the Titans... I purposely let them kill me. I let them devour me, I let them savor my tainted blood. Do you want to know why, Armin?"_

_Armin whimpered loudly._

_'It hurt so much for me to raise such a cowardly grandson like you. One that was always pushed around, one that couldn't even lift a good stack of firewood even to save their own life. I'll tell you one thing; I'm glad that I died. I'm glad that I left you, and the only regret I have is actually going through my way to raise a piece of shit like you,'_

_"Grandfather...?" the blonde gasped._

_'Don't even bother calling me 'grandfather'. You were a mistake – You're a complete failure, one that will only let everyone down. I'm going to say this once, and only once – No one ever loved you,'_

_Armin instantly curled back into a fetal position and pulled violently at his own hair, screaming loudly into the darkness with all the strength he had left._

* * *

**Extra Note: **My god you guys I'm so sorry for doing that to Armin ;-; hating life right now.

... But I'll be completely honest, I enjoyed writing those 2-3 Eren x Levi paragraphs.


	23. XXIII: Skulk

**Note: **Ah shit it took me way too long to write this chapter. I had family over for the past few days, and hell, was it irritating. I had to keep the younger ones entertained... my back hurt like hell at the end of the day. Anyways... here's chapter 23. I'm surprised I got here, and I'm just itching to get things typed down. I continued off from the dream Armin had in the previous chapter... screaming. Crying. God it hurts, breaking Armin like that. Am I the only one that actually cried after writing certain parts in their fafiction? I'm weird Q_Q ooh it hurts. Things will get better for both Armin and Eren, don't worry... and it was just yesterday that I was thinking of having Armin top Eren. It's rare that you'll find Armin topping Eren. I need that kink written down. Despite my needs, I'm still going to have Eren top Armin. It's been like that, even in the beta one-shot. Sucks ;-; I added a bit more Eruri in this chapter, I hope you don't mind. Levi is still pretty reluctant when it comes to being in a relationship with Erwin, but soon enough, he'll come out of the closet. I'm sorry if I offend some of you by saying the Lord's name in vain; Mind you, I _am _a religious person, but that doesn't stop me from saying 'God damn it' or 'Jesus' shit'. I'm on the highway to hell, you guys. I just noticed something: I have way to much fun writing these chapter notes. I'm surprised if some of you are actually reading these. Like, all holy hell,I love you guys c: [Insert heavy breathing here.]

* * *

_**XXIII: Skulk**_

Eren nearly fell off his chair as he was viciously pulled out of his uneasy sleep with a scream. His heart nearly jumped up into his throat as he stood up from his seat, accidentally knocking it over. The loud clatter of the chair hitting the ground mixed with the screaming made his ears throb painfully; It took him some time to see that the one screaming was Armin. The nurses instantly burst into the room, hastening over the threshold to Armin's side. Eren watched through widened eyes as Armin violently pulled on his bangs and curled onto his side, his voice soon becoming hoarse with each heavy intake of breath. His face was covered with both tears and an intense shade of scarlet – surely his fever was getting worse by the minute.

"He's burning up!"

"- Get him some medicine and cold water,"

"I thought we gave him the medication an hour ago,"

"- _We did,_"

He felt a hand grip his shoulder firmly, gaining only a [very] small portion of his attention. The doctor that had scolded him a few hours before gently shook him to try to gain his full attention, though the attempt was in vain. Eren watched as the nurses tried to calm the raging blonde, one of them carrying a thin bottle of medicine in her hand. She measured a small spoonful and tried to make Armin drink it despite being asleep (though it hardly looked like it). Instead of drinking the medicine, he whimpered loudly and buried his head within the pillow. The grip on Eren's shoulder tightened significantly.

"I'm sorry, Eren, but you're going to have to leave,"

Eren tried to shake off the tightened grip on his shoulder as he was pulled away from Armin's sickbed by a stray nurse, the doctor immediately rushing to the blonde's side. "Why can't I stay with him?!"

The nurse that was pulling him answered quietly, "You can visit him tomorrow, honey. He's not in the best condition right now – we don' know what -"

"- No, I'm staying here with him!"

"Sir, I'm sorry, you can't!"

It took Eren by full surprise as he was pushed out of the infirmary door by the rather fragile looking nurse. The door instantly locked afterward, earning a 'tch' of disapproval. The brunette smacked his fist onto the door in a vain attempt to get them to open it, Armin's muffled cries bringing tears to the corners of his eyes. It hurt him so much to hear Armin's voice, crying and screaming into the cold night. He didn't even know what time it was, though it couldn't have been too late since the hallways around him weren't pitch black yet. The only sources of light were the opened windows above him, allowing moonlight to brightly shine through. He reluctantly turned his back to the door and took a couple of hesitant steps away from it, trying his hardest to block out the noises coming from the infirmary.

The hallways were certainly cold at night, which he finally noticed after months of living at the old Survey Corps base. Goosebumps erupted over his skin as he wrapped his arms around himself to keep warm. He didn't even have the chance to collect his coat from the coat hanger before he was kicked out of the infirmary, and hell, did he regret not keeping it on before knocking out by Armin's side. He felt as if he had his hands in everything; He felt pain from the fact that Armin's fever is only getting worse, he felt happiness because Armin no longer believes that he's with their superior, and atop of all that, he was worried about what would happen next. Could it be that he was afraid of tomorrow? He bit his lip softly as he took his necklace in his hand, giving it one last doubtful look before stufifng it back into his shirt.

It was like Levi said during the 57th Expedition; You'll never know what's going to happen next.

**o0o0o0o**

Mikasa yawned softly as she tightened the straps she had wrapped around her foreleg. After spending the last two or three hours skulking around the castle, she started to feel drowsy and a bit off-balance. She leaned against the cold wall, somewhat oblivious to the things around her, which really wasn't good, considering the fact that anything could happen to her for being so vulnerable. Her stomach gave a low growl before tightening painfully, earning a small grunt of discomfort. She wrapped her arms around her stomach and bent over a bit to ease the pain. Besides the time she ate dinner the previous week, she had absolutely nothing. She knew it wasn't healthy, but that really didn't spark her concern in the slightest.

She couldn't exactly explain why she had been denying food, she just didn't feel the need to eat. The raven's hand slithered into her coat and thumbed a small bag with food wrapped neatly in paper inside of it. She had previously been given food by Sasha, who walked into her while fleeing the kitchens. Sasha could easily sneak food out of the kitchens whenever she wanted to, and Mikasa considered herself lucky for having a friend that would go out of their way to sneak her some food. It would be careless to eat out in the hallways in the middle of the night, but she just couldn't help herself. Her stomach growled once more as she hastened to unfold the paper, shivering softly as a stray breeze from the window above her brushed her hair.

A small sigh left her lips as she ate the food, a sweetness running throughout her body as if she had been given something she wanted. Whether it had been the late hour that made her weary or the starvation, she now felt better after eating the bread and cheese that had been given to her. Some part of her felt ashamed for doing such a thing, but she kept thinking back on what Eren said to her before_ ('Mikasa, you better start eating your food, okay? It's starting to scare me a bit. You're not eating, and that isn't good for humanity's second strongest soldier')_. Eren was worried about her, and she couldn't offend him in such a way. She can't bring herself to do that... but isn't that what she's been doing this whole time? It hurts to think that.

With her stomach finally satisfied and the paper left spotless, she stuffed it back into her coat, the bag crumpling loudly as it came in contact. She winced softly at the sudden noise; Her senses were finally coming back to her. A good sign, yet shameful to think that her cat-like senses were wearing thin. Standing up correctly, she straightened her back and pulled her muffler over her nose, nuzzling comfortably against it. She skulked through the darken hallways, her eyes blackened and her head kept low; No one can know that she had been given permission by the Commander to guard the castle at night. Not a sound was heard in the hallways beside the low howls of wind that was barely noticeable to the human ear.

Her breathing was kept shallow – undetectable – being given all the rights to make a quiet murder if necessary. That brought some sort of excitement to her. She had been hearing the rumors about Armin and Commander Erwin, and she was just itching to catch their attackers. Her eyes slightly narrowed in hatred as she thought back to the time she eavesdropped on Annie and Reiner. Ever since those attacks happened, Reiner, Bertolt, and Annie were nowhere to be found in Karanese or Stohess. It _almost _scared her to think that they would betray humanity in such a way. It _almost_ scared her to think that Reiner - everyone's 'big brother' and hero – would ever side with the Female Titan.

The key word was _almost_.

Praise the heavens that Mikasa is able to keep her weapons aimed and able to push away her fears. The fear she had that Eren would be hurt, kidnapped, or killed was most unwillingly pushed aside when she took on the offer for being the castle's guard dog under the moonlight. Or was she now considered a cat, since she skulked around like one? She'd usually come by in the middle of the night to check up on Eren and Armin, maybe earlier if she felt it was necessary. She promised herself (and Mrs. Jaeger) that she'd protect Eren, and Armin applied to that promise as well since they are all tied together with one beautiful ribbon. She knows what she should do, though it may be considered a sin to be checking up on them as if they were small children.

Mikasa's thoughts were immediately cut short as footsteps were heard at the end of the hallway she was skulking through. With a sharp intake of breath, she dipped low at a stray cabinet's side. The cabinet she hid behind held a glass vase at the roof, and hell would she be in trouble if she managed to knock that over. With a cautious glance, she pressed herself against the wall and the side of the cabinet, lifting her head towards the footsteps. Her heartbeat increased as they neared her; Today may be the first time she actually ambushed someone at night. Every other time was just a soldier wandering towards the restroom at night or one of her superiors making their way to their rooms after staying a couple of hours in their offices with paperwork.

Step by step.

Her already shallow breaths were caught at the back of her throat.

Careful footsteps, echoing throughout the night.

As the person passed by her, she cautiously let out the breath she had been holding. The person that walked by her was wearing a uniform and a green cloak that had the Wings of Freedom embroidered on its back. It must have been one of her superiors walking back to their dorm at night. She stood up from the ground and watched as her superior turned the corner, yet for some reason, their footsteps were oddly hurried before they came to an abrupt silence. It was either he or she made it to their room, or they were hiding from something.

Why would they be hiding?

The raven shook her head and reluctantly laid back against the wall, yawning softly once more. She was fully aware at how her superiors can handle themselves, so it was nothing to worry about. A couple of minutes passed by as she found herself lightly nodding off. She was being careless for once. It felt good to be careless. It felt good to adventure into the road of her imagination and sweet thoughts.

Though she immediately regret that once she heard a muffled cry in the distance.

**o0o0o0o**

"So how long is this going to be here, anyways?"

Levi bit his lip as he scowled at the cast around Erwin's arm. They were sitting together in Erwin's bed, though Levi insisted on sitting at the side of the bed instead of laying next to him. He huffed softly in a silent laugh as Levi ran his fingers along the rough surface of the cast, a small grimace forming on his face.

"What, does it bother you?"

The raven playfully flicked at the cast and replied, "No, it just disgusts me to imagine how fucked up it would have looked,"

"That hurt a little," Erwin pouted.

"Sue me,"

The clock that was hung on the wall across from them ticked loudly, the lamp slightly flickering as the flame it held danced beautifully before dying out after a long day. A soft yawn left Levi's lips as he stretched out his back, weakly rubbing his eyes in the process. Erwin only watched Levi do this, though he didn't feel tired at all. The raven grunted softly in discomfort as he flexed his fingers, glancing over to Erwin to see that he was watching him.

"What, are you not tired?" Levi asked. "Jesus cock sucking Christ, Erwin... having to help you with your paperwork in addition to mine is a pain in the ass, now that I look at it,"

The blonde rolled his eyes. "You don't have to if you don't want to,"

"I do it because I want to. What's more is that you can't sign your name, even to save your own life,"

"Don't worry. Besides paperwork, there's nothing more important for me to do during the day, besides talking to you," Erwin smiled.

"Now's not the time to get cheesy," Levi growled as a faint blush forced its way onto his cheeks. "Are you sure paperwork is the only thing that you've been doing? Last time I checked, I caught Ackerman out in the hallways in the middle of the night. More than once, actually,"

He bit his lip; It was hard to believe that Mikasa was actually being careless. "Is that so...?"

Levi nodded. "Mind telling me why the hell she's out at night?"

"You'll never know, maybe she's going to the restroom, or -"

"- Now isn't the time to bullshit with me," he cut in. "I want to know why she's been out at night. She's been careless lately, and having her roaming the castle in pure darkness really isn't a good idea,"

The blonde sighed and rest his head back on the pillows. "This is something that I'd like to discuss with Eren in the room with us, but If I really had to tell you..." he hesitated. "... well, the other day, Mikasa reported to me that she heard two soldiers having a conversation under a topic related to the 57th Expedition, and I offered her duty during twilight,"

He held his breath as he watched Levi cross one leg over the other. Levi loosened the straps on his legs as he lightly shook his head.

"I know Ackerman's one of the best soldiers we've had in years, but -" the raven idly turned his head towards his lover with an unimpressed look on his face, "- she's not a cat, so she shouldn't skulk around like one,"

"I knew you wouldn't approve," Erwin huffed as he readjusted himself in his sheets. "Think of it, Levi, if we have some of our best soldiers out at night, we could get some information, or even catch the people who attack Armin and I,"

"And did she report anything unusual?"

Erwin licked his chapped lips. "... No,"

The raven let out an small 'tch' and stood up from the bed. "Look, it's fine, I really don't mind,"

"You're serious?" Erwin gasped.

"As serious as can be," he nodded. "I'm just telling you right now – if she's really that careless, she shouldn't be out at night. She's not even doing so well on normal duty. It's never safe within these walls, especially in the castle. If she's hungry or tired, tell her to get back to her dorm. We already lost enough as it is; The Commander and one of our strategists are being forced back down to their beds to rest for a useful amount of time. Time is one of the very many things we don't have, you know,"

"You didn't lose me or Armin - we're not dead,"

"You might as well be,"

The blonde shook his head with a soft smile on his lips. His eyes began to feel heavy as his heart filled with the feeling of relief – he no longer had to hide from Levi. His lover saw his and made a 'hmph' of disapproval; The raven bent over Erwin and planted a lazy kiss on his cheek, though his expression didn't change at all.

"Just don't do anything rash, all right?" Levi muttered.

Before Erwin nodded off, he murmured, "You sounded concerned for a second there,"

With another embarrassed 'tch', he left Erwin to finally sleep in peace.

**o0o0o0o**

Eren yawned as he stretched out his back, a sudden chill running down his spine in the process. He was being careless, though; His footsteps were echoing through the hallway, and he'd be in serious trouble if he walked into someone on his way back to his dorm. Not that he was complaining, though. Armin was worth the trouble, even if it meant his head at the end of the day. His jaw ached after he yawned so deeply, his eyelids feeling heavy after being woken up in such a terrible way. The hallways were very dim despite the spotlights of moonlight above him, but by now his eyes had already adjusted to the setting. It was hard to recognize certain corridors, but he still managed to make his way through the hallways.

Though there was just one thing he couldn't see.

He felt someone grip his shoulders and violently throw him against the wall nearest to him. He felt the back of his head smack against the frigid wall, a low groan of discomfort leaving his lips. With widened eyes, he frantically looked around to see who had done it, though the search was fruitless. As he lifted his arms to form his fighting stance, he felt two small (yet robust) hands clamp around his throat. With a strangled growl, he immediately clawed at the forearms of whoever had attack him; He now saw that his attacker was wearing a uniform, their face covered with the hood of the green cloak usually worn on missions. His eyes widened. It couldn't have been someone in the Survey Corps, could it?

"W- What the hell?" Eren choked out.

The hood of his attacker slowly fell down to their shoulders as he or she shook their head; Soon enough, he found that whoever had been attacking him... was Annie.

"It doesn't hurt too much, does it?" she purred dangerously, the grip around his throat tightening significantly.

With a shaky gasp, he replied, "What are you going to do -" his right arm left her forearms and formed a tight fist, "- strangle me to death?"

His fist came in contact with her stomach; He grinned as he heard a loud intake of breath from Annie. Her grip loosened – only slightly – though it was enough for him to pry her hands away from her throat and skillfully sidestep her. His foot swiftly slid against the ground, finding their way to her feet and tripping her with ease. Annie hit the cold floor, a small laugh rumbling from the back of her throat as Eren pinned her to the ground.

"What's wrong, Annie? I thought you'd put up more of a fight," Eren laughed. "I've been craving this action for a _long _time. What's it to you – _Female Titan_?"

"So you've heard," the blonde grinned.

"It pays off, cleaning your superior's desk until your hands rot away from all the soap,"

"If you're craving the action -" Annie pushed against the restrains on her wrists, which only tightened, "- then I'll give it to you -" she delivered a swift headbutt to the brunette, a dull crack echoing throughout the hall, followed with a bitter hiss of pain, "- though I highly doubt it'll feel great,"

She reached up and forcefully pulled her wrists away from the restraints, grabbing Eren by the hair and throwing him to the ground, as far away from her as possible. Annie recollected herself and stood up correctly, her fists coming up and stopping just above her head; A unique fighting stance, used only by her in the entire 104th Trainee Squad. Eren saw this and grinned as he, too, stood up from the ground and formed fists at his chest. They stood there, not a movement to be made or a sound to be heard.

"Ready for round two?"

It was Eren that went for it first.

Despite the very dull lighting and prickling pain at the base of his forehead, he still believed that he had a chance to win. He swiftly ran towards her, bringing his fist over his head and preparing to deliver a sweet, painful blow to her eye. He wanted to break her – murder her – for making the Survey Corps go through such pain. Such losses were made that day, and he wanted revenge. Vengeance could have been sweet if he was actually paying more attention than usual to her movements. Annie swiftly kicked at his ankles, bringing him down to the cold earth with a loud thud.

It put him to shame to think that the exact same thing that happened before would happen to him again during a fight. Eren grunted as he came to his knees, only to feel Annie straddle his lower back and wrap an arm tightly around his neck. The brunette tilted his head back as he fell onto the floor, his knees giving away under him from her weight. The blonde tightened the hold she had around Eren's neck; She was in the perfect position to snap his neck with just one controlled flex of her muscle.

"We're back to square one again – it's really comfortable here, isn't it?"

"Shut up, you cheeky bastard!" he snarled.

"Why don't you?"

One of Annie's hands found their way into Eren's hair and gripped tightly, letting go completely from his neck and slamming his head back down to the floor. Eren muttered something under his breath as his eyes blanked white with the sudden impact, though it wasn't enough to actually kill him. The blonde's hands skillfully slithered down into the collar of his shirt as if it was searching for something. Eren immediately knew what she was looking for and tried to slap her hands away. It was too late, though; Her hand latched onto the string of Eren's necklace and violently yanked it off his neck, a heavy outtake of breath leaving her lips as she faced victory. The brunette tried to elbow her with all the strength he had, but she was already up and off of him.

With one last glint of the eye, she delivered a swift kick to his side, lifting her foot up and bringing it back down to the back of his head. Annie wanted to make sure that he wouldn't follow right after her, though she knew that his Titan powers were more than enough to cover for it. It was because of this fact that she had to flee as soon as possible; Eren was like glue – it's hard to get him off. While she took a couple of steps back, she hastened to tie the necklace around her own neck, the key attached to it shimmering brightly against the moonlight coming in through the window above them. This earned her a disapproving glare.

"That isn't yours!" Eren snarled.

She turned her back to him and darted off into the night, completely forgetting to hide the key and put the hood of her cloak back on. "The devil came to collect,"

"You little _bitch_!"

* * *

**Extra Note: **Nyahaha, I broke Eren. He's one potty mouth when he's pissed, isn't he? I had fun writing this part ^-^ Though this would be one of my first times writing an action scene o.o ahhahhh ;-;


	24. XXIV: Expiation

**Note: **Mikasa is beautiful, sorry for making her starve herself in this fanfiction. I love her too, you know. Things will get better, but hell, at least she had one of her badass moments here, with a careless Annie. So I'm debating the next character death - I never liked Marlowe. Nor am I too fond of Jean or Mike... ahhah. hah. o.o I added some Ymir x Krista in here, mainly because I can and because I'm hating life right now, so yeah. Waiting for the next chapter to come out and shit. Ugh it hurts. Yes, Ymir knows much more than she's leading on - more things concerning that scene in the middle will happen later on, after I get some of the Eremin out of my system. You don't know how inspiring fanart and music can be for me when I try writing a fluffy Eremin scene.

There's also going to be more Jean later on in the way of life...I hope you don't mind c:

* * *

**_XXIV: Expiation_  
**

Mikasa soundlessly darted off towards the direction of the cry (_'You little bitch!' _if she heard correctly). The ends of her scarf fluttered beautifully behind her, bouncing in time with each of her movements. It was hard, trying to run while also trying not to make a sound, yet she managed just fine. The thrill of it got her heart racing, but she couldn't deny that some part of her wanted to stay back and ignore it as if nothing happened. She nearly starved herself to death; Surely she couldn't fight like she used to before the 57th Expedition? She should investigate, at the very least.

If she really had heard correctly, that muffled cry was oddly familiar. Too familiar for her own comfort. As she effortlessly turned the corner, she nearly smacked into someone, yet she sidestepped at the very last second. Her darkened eyes widened as she scanned the person; They were wearing a uniform, a ruffled green cloak draped carelessly around their shoulders and a necklace messily tied around their neck. Taking a couple of steps back, she also saw the usual messily tied up blonde hair and almost naturally worn unimpressed look.

"I didn't think I'd be seeing you in a long time, Annie," Mikasa chuckled darkly, taking another couple of steps back to create some sort of distance.

"What's wrong?" Annie snapped as she carelessly tried to tuck the necklace into her shirt. "Are you not happy to see -" she let out an irritated 'tch' as the string of the necklace broke, "- your old comrade?"

Mikasa watched as the blonde hastened to stuff the necklace into the small pocket of her jacket, though she had only very mild interest in it. The only thing that actually sparked her interest was the thing that glinted brightly before being hidden away in her jacket. She bit her lip with a small growl and nearly tore the skin that her teeth sunk into; Her frustration got the complete best of her once she recognized that the necklace was Eren's. The key said it all.

"So you've met Eren on the way here?" Mikasa said while forming her own fighting stance. "You've got to be mental if you think you're going to get away with his necklace,"

Annie laughed and lifted her fists. "You have a dangerous look in your eyes. I won't deny that it's giving me the chills,"

"Glad to know," the raven grinned. "I was just thinking, but tell me something I already know here -" she took a threatening step towards her, "- You were involved in the ambush with Armin and Commander Erwin, weren't you?"

"Commander Erwin doesn't concern me right now. What actually has my interest is Armin, though I'm actually _very _impressed with how long he held out with that terrible fever he has. Didn't he get it recently? Sorry for causing that,"

Mikasa's eyes narrowed dangerously as she sprinted towards the blonde, her fists readied at her side. Thus their battle begun; It was remarkable how Mikasa kept up with Annie. Each of their hits or kicks barely missed by a hair, the fight itself being unusually silent besides the usual dangerous whisk of wind by one of their ears or the scuffling of footsteps.

"I thought you were only after Eren's blood," the blonde laughed breathlessly as she narrowly dodged a blow to the face. "I didn't think Armin was of any concern to you. Wouldn't you be protecting Eren with your life by now?"

"I treat Armin like my own child -" Mikasa nearly tripped over her own two feet, "- though it'd be wrong to say that now, considering his relationship with my brother,"

"No, you two aren't related at all – not in the slightest. Eren's only your brother by 'adoption', not by blood - and should I add the fact that you two don't even share the same name, even after that adoption?"

"What does that have to do with anything? -"Mikasa lightly staggered as she dodged a swift kick aimed for the shins. "- It doesn't matter if we don't share the same name. He's my brother, and I'll always care for him,"

"Could it be that you -" Annie took this opening to deliver a quick blow to Mikasa's stomach, "- _love Eren?_"

Annie watched as the raven stayed motionless, only slightly bent over her foreleg. Mikasa's fist was still in the air, midway through a punch, but it fell back down to lay useless at her side. This made her laugh; She was the first to finally break the teenage prodigy – the best female soldier that graduated at sixteen – a soldier that was quite rare to come across. However, he victory was cut very short as Mikasa skillfully snaked her arms around her leg.

"What was that? The only thing I heard over the sound of my own heart pounding was _'Eren,'_"

A small grunt of discomfort left Mikasa's lips as she tightened her arms around the blonde's leg and threw her against the wall behind them. Annie was left to hit the wall with a dull crack, falling on her knees to the floor and groaning softly in pain. One of Mikasa's arms slithered over her own stomach and gripped tightly as her stomach clenched painfully, slightly crumpling over to ease the pain. She was right before – she's hardly standing in the correct condition to fight. A small glint was seen at the corner of her eye; Mikasa gave a devilish smirk and hid behind the folds of her scarf.

She stood up correctly and said, "Where are we, Annie?"

Annie got to her feet and went back to her fighting stance. "What, you're giving up now? I'll admit, that hurt, but it'll take a lot more than that to get rid of me,"

"Why don't you just give up now?"

"They told me to bring back this key. It doesn't belong to Eren – it belongs to _him_,"

Mikasa tilted her head in confusion. "Him? I don't give a rat's ass about who that person is or what he wants. What I want now is answers about how I can get Armin back to a healthy state. I really don't like to see Eren agitated over something so little,"

"I thought you said you treated Armin like your own child. So much for that bullshit, huh? I'll educate Eren for a bit on the topic of fevers once I see him -" Annie slightly bent her knees before swiftly dashing off towards the raven's direction, "- Which will probably be in hell,"

She readied herself, but as soon as Annie started, she stopped; Mikasa lowered her fists and watched as Annie's eyes flicked towards their left, her head only slightly turning that way. She followed her line of vision and saw someone standing at the foot of the hallway.

It was Eren.

Her heart enlightened to see Eren, though at the same time, she felt worried; Was Eren all right? As Mikasa got caught up in her own train of thought, Annie turned her back towards them and darted off into the dark corridor, not a footstep to be heard. As soon as Eren saw this, he growled angrily and raised a foot to follow her, but stopped immediately afterward.

Annie looked back over her shoulder and called, "Remember one thing, Eren – _blood!_"

_'Blood?'_

She then disappeared off into the shadows. It would be pointless to try to follow her now. Eren set her last comment off towards the back of his head and made for Mikasa instead, fury still left in the pits of his eyes.

"Why did you let her leave, Mikasa?! That's careless – she had my necklace! We need to tell Commander Erwin - or someone! Why the hell would she be here, anyways?"

As the raven idly shook her head, he nudged on, "_Mikasa?"_

"The only reason why I let her leave is because I know this won't be her last time visiting,"

Eren's tensed muscles relaxed for a bit; So he still had a chance to get his sweet revenge? "How do you know that?"

"Because -" Mikasa pointed a thumb over her shoulder towards the ground, using the other hand to readjust the scarf covering her mouth, "- She was the one being careless around here,"

So they hadn't faced defeat, after all.

There on the floor lay his key, shining brightly under the moonlight.

**o0o0o0o**

_(Next day; Repair.)_

_(Nine hours later; Morning, thirty past seven.)_

Eren's hand slithered over Armin's and gripped tightly - the blonde's skin was still very hot to the touch. He was still shaken by what the nurses told him before; _'He's not going to live very long', 'We've never experienced an illness like his', 'We're very sorry for you... enjoy your time with him now.' _It hurt, letting those words slip into his ears so carelessly. He always told himself that he'd be the one to take Armin's place, but he just couldn't repeat those same words anymore. It was always Armin who was scared about leaving this earth – whether his death was in vain or not, it didn't matter. The only thing that mattered to him was if he was actually useful to humanity and his friends... if he actually mattered to Eren.

It hurts too much to think of that. The rain is falling and his fingers were slipping off the edge. He let out a heavy sigh as his eyes scanned Armin's face once more; Armin wore a very pained expression, his skin drenched with sweat, his face very pale behind the intense shade of scarlet, tears still built up in the corners of his eyes. Did he have a nightmare again? Eren started to wonder – what was the meaning of life? This heartless thing people call life?

"... No, it's not heartless... it brought us together," Eren absentmindedly muttered under his breath.

He blushed softly in embarrasment as he said his innermost thoughts aloud. He shifted himself in his seat for a bit before leaning over and weaving his fingers into Armin's soft hair. Despite it looking terrible after a week laying in his sickbed, the blonde's hair was still soft and comforting, only making Eren feel worse. If Armin was going to die soon... was this the last time he got to touch his hair?

_'Does this mean I'll have to say good night to you early?'_

He remembered when they were kids, when they used to always play outside with Mikasa or read about the world beyond the walls in the comfort of their own little 'hideout.' He was always kept in charge of the illegal books since the Military Police would always search their library, but he didn't mind that. Armin could give less of the damn what the Military did, and Eren admired him for that. He missed the peaceful times in Shiganshina. He missed the times he spent reading and playing with Armin, he missed the times he spent tending to Armin's wounds and comforting him with warm arms. Now that he thought of it, he was always there for Armin. He only met the blonde's Grandfather, but he's never met his parents. He'd always mention how his parents said that they were visiting the outside world - this whole time, was he too ignorant to see that he actually meant that his parents were dead?

_'They were always in the 'outside world', weren't they? We didn't know what it was. I'm guessing it was heaven - they were living happily ever after in the afterlife. I'm sorry for ever doubting you, Armin... you're going to be reunited with your parents soon, aren't you?'_

Eren shivered softly as tears welled up in the corners of his eyes. It hurt so much to think that Armin was going to leave him. It also hurt like hell to lay an eye on the bandages he still had wrapped around his arms. Why the hell wasn't he there to protect him? It hurts – It hurts. He lightly tightened his grip on Armin's hair before letting go completely, bringing the same hand up to his eyes to wipe the tears away. This was a mistake, though; As soon as the palm of his hand came in contact with his eyelid, he unfolded and started to cry. It's been too long since he's actually cried freely. Tears ran down his face as he rubbed his eye harder, soon bringing both of his palms up to his face and sobbing into them. He felt so week right now – it would have been embarrassing if it wasn't about Armin.

But was Armin worth his tears? That's something to think about. He loves Armin; That fact alone was most salient at the moment. He can't see himself losing Armin in any way possible - the pain was too much. He sniffled softly and rubbed his sleeve against his running nose. It was disgusting to do that, but he didn't care. He watched as Armin's eyes fluttered lightly... and a thick tear fell from his eye. One single tear. As Eren watched the tear slide down his cheek and onto his jawline, he found himself smiling softly.

Had Armin sensed his grief?

_'You'll reach out to me, right?'_

The pain slowly inched away from his grasp.

_'Prove them wrong, Armin. You're strong – stronger than me sometimes,'_

He let out a very faint mewl of defeat and wiped the tears away. He hoped for a miracle to happen - he prayed for something to save Armin. He felt terrible for not being able to save Armin, himself, but right now he'd give anything to be able to hold the blonde in his arms once more. To be able to kiss his lips while he was actually awake, to be able to shower him with butterfly kisses and gently sway with his frail body caught within his embrace. While he dried himself of his tears, he heard a rough knock on the door behind him. Before he had the chance to say anything, the door swung open and revealed Ymir and Krista. He saw that Krista was hiding something behind her back.

"How are you, Eren?" Krista called happily as she hastened to show him what she had been hiding behind her back. "I got Armin these -" she held up a small bouquet of flowers and announced proudly, "I picked them myself! You think he'll like it?"

Eren laughed softly and stood up from his seat. "I'm sure he'll love it. Why don't you put it on the counter next to him?"

"I'm jealous," Ymir pouted as they made their way to Armin's side.

While Krista gingerly placed the flowers on the counter, Ymir wrapped an arm around here. "Hey Eren – how long have you been here, anyways? Looks like you didn't get any sleep – your eyes are red,"

Eren bit his lip and turned away, rubbing his eyes furiously. "Y- Yeah, I stayed up late last night,"

She couldn't know the truth. It's too embarrassing.

"Er – Why are you here so early, anyways?" the brunette asked.

Ymir tightened the hold she had around Krista and said, "Krista was just way too impatient. She picked these flowers yesterday during duty and she didn't want them to die. I thought they were for me, though..."

"I'll pick you some later on," Krista beamed.

Eren smiled softly as he returned to Armin's side, lightly shifting in his seat. The longer he stared at Armin's extremely pale face or held his hand, the harder it became to contain his tears. Instead, he propped his elbows on the bed and rested his head on two folded hands. It looked like he was tired, yet Ymir knew that wasn't the case here. She let go of Krista and sat at the foot of Armin's sickbed, a small squeak of the mattress making Eren wince softly. She scanned Armin, her eyes flicking from his pale face to his heaving chest and bandaged forearms.

"Say, Eren -" Ymir hesitated for a moment. "- Is there something you'd like to tell me... about Armin?"

Krista gave her a reproachful look and turned her back towards the two, walking towards the windowsill and peering out the window instead.

"What do you mean?" Eren asked.

"Look... Armin was ambushed, right?" She gestured at his bandaged arms and broken wrist. "Tell me – do you know who did it?"

Eren straightened his back and said, "Why does this concern you, Ymir? I thought you'd give less of a shit about Armin,"

"Answer my question and I'll answer yours," Ymir said flatly.

With a small huff, Eren said, "You're confusing me, Ymir. You probably won't believe me or even give a damn if I told you -" he bit his lip and partially lied, "I'm guessing Annie had something to do with it. We don't know for sure, but some hands are getting pointed at her,"

Ymir's eyes slightly widened with minor surprise. "... Annie, you say?"

"Mhm,"

Ymir looked around for a bit before standing up from the foot of Armin's bed and making her way to a counter across from them. She knew Annie much more than Eren did – and her relation to Reiner and Bertolt. At first, it almost scared her to see how much of a mess Armin was in at the moment, but it all slowly came together. As she rummaged around the counter, she laid her hand on something both round and smooth – a needle.

"Eren... did Annie tell you anything at all the past couple of days?" she asked, looking back over her shoulder and saying in a serious tone, "If you lie to me about anything, just keep in mind that your friend's life is on the line,"

This angered him. He stood from his seat and shot at her, "He's more than just a friend, you bastard. Are you trying to threaten me?"

"Let's keep this short, sweet, and to the god forsaken point,"

Eren bit his lip in frustration and sat back down in his seat. "I'm not sure where you're going with this, but I was planning to talk to Commander Erwin about it later on when I caught up to him. He's really busy, so -"

"- I said short and sweet,"

With a small 'tch', he said, "I ran into Annie some time ago, and she mentioned something about 'blood,'"

"Ah," she picked up the needle in her hand and walked back towards Eren. "Tell me, Eren – why are you so ignorant?"

He ignored the insult and questioned, "What're you doing with that needle?"

"Listen, Eren – you have to trust me on this, okay? As much of an asshole I tend to be -" _("Don't call yourself that," Krista muttered under her breath,) _"- you're going to have to believe me with this one,"

"Believe you with what?"

"If Annie mentioned blood... don't you think it has some sort of connection with Armin's illness?"

Eren tilted his head.

"Just hold out your arm. Think – blood. Blood. What could have caused a fever so intense?" Ymir asked impatiently, holding up the needle.

Eren reluctantly held out his arm, but he immediately took it back. "What're you getting to?"

Ymir clicked her tongue impatiently and said, "Damn it – I don't have to draw you a picture. He was infected by something. Look at this needle and link Annie together with blood. Heat and blood,"

The brunette still didn't understand, yet he still held out his arm towards Ymir's impatient hand anyways. Ymir sensed how tense he was and shook her head. How ignorant did Eren have to be? She [none-too-gently] shoved the needle into Eren's forearm, quickly drawing a large portion of blood and taking it back out in one swift movement. Eren couldn't deny that it hurt; It didn't look like Ymir was a god damn expert when it came to dealing with medical equipment. He pouted as he rubbed his forearm upon the point of impact, swiping the small droplet of blood that formed on the tiny wound. He then looked up and watched as Ymir carelessly grabbed Armin's uninjured wrist and held it up to her chest.

As she brought the needle closer to Armin's skin, Eren raged, "What the hell are you doing?!"

He didn't even have a chance to stop her. She sunk the needle into his forearm (through the small opening left between two bandages) and forcefully pushed the blood inside of his system. Eren felt the color drain from his face – the Titan powers that coursed through his blood could kill someone as frail as Armin.

It hit him pretty hard.

"What the hell, Ymir?! That's not even – he can die from that!" Eren violently stood up from his seat, knocking the chair back. "Are you trying to kill him?!"

"If he dies, he dies,"

Eren reached an arm across the bed to the collar of Ymir's shirt and gripped tightly. They both leaned over Armin's sickbed, Ymir wearing an amused look on her face.

"What's wrong, Eren?"

"If he dies because of you, I swear to god, your blood _will_ be mine," Eren rasped.

Krista's gentle voice was heard amongst them."Eren, trust in Ymir's human nature,"

Whether Krista was a goddess or an angel, no one knew, but Eren found himself loosening the grip he had on Ymir's collar. Ymir slapped his hand away with a small 'tch' and carelessly threw the used needle to the side. It fell to the ground and shattered – soon after that, a nurse came in through the office door. She gave them a questioning look, which Krista immediately answered with a calm tone.

"Sorry about that, one of the needles left its place on the counter when my friend dropped his chair. He accidentally knocked it over, but don't worry, we'll clean it up right away,"

The nurse let out a small 'oh' as she nodded, muttering something about being careful before she sunk back into the office once more. Eren let out a sigh and sat back down in his seat, swiftly running a hand through his hair. That showed his complete stress, which utterly annoyed Ymir.

"Listen, Eren," she reached out a hand and grabbed Krista's wrist, "I'm much smarter than you think. I told you to trust me, and if he dies, he dies. Don't look at me like that -" she sneered at Eren's glare, "- if he dies, I won't lay a hand on Krista for a week. Deal?"

"Ymir -" the blonde giggled softly.

Eren sighed once more and watched as they walked towards the exit. He didn't care anymore – but he decided he could trust Ymir. Just this once. He gave Armin one last doubtful look before laying his aching head back down in his arms, grunting softly in discomfort. Whatever the hell Ymir did, he didn't know, nor did it concern him now. Armin mattered to him more than Ymir's bullshit.

"By the way, Eren, it's okay to cry, especially if it's over your lover,"

The brunette growled in frustration and clenched the sheets around him (though he was careful not to disturb Armin), ignoring Ymir's cruel laugh.

**o0o0o0o**

Krista watched as Ymir threw herself back onto her bed; She was always burned out at the end of the day, but this time, she looked worse than the last time. She can sense that Ymir was stressed, but she couldn't tell why. A small thought clicked at the back of her head – was it because of what she did to Armin earlier? She wasn't entirely sure why Ymir had injected Armin with Eren's own blood, nor could she deny that she was suspicious about it. Krista didn't bother asking the blonde, but one thing she does know is that Armin will be all right. She trusts Ymir, enough to believe that she helped a hurting soul, and even comforted her comrade (in one way or the other). Ymir found herself trapped within the line of Krista's concerned glare. She rolled her eyes and turned her back towards the blonde.

"What is it, Krista? You don't look so great,"

Krista smiled softly and sat at the foot of Ymir's bed. "Compared to you at the moment?"

The brunette turned back to her and said, "My legs feel like they're going to fall off,"

"Why is that? You hardly moved,"

"Standing requires a lot of energy," Ymir said with a sarcastic tone. She held out her arms and added, "Maybe a hug will make me feel better?"

Krista merely shook her head with an embarrassed grin and climbed into Ymir's arms. She was wrapped in a tight embrace, giggling softly as she felt Ymir plant a warm kiss on the top of her head.

"Sorry about earlier – as much as I hate Eren's ignorance, I had to help him in one way or another,"

The blonde hummed softly before replying, "Ymir, I was wondering... was that just another attempt of expiation...?"

A small pause.

"Hardly," Ymir huffed.

"Then... what does Eren's blood have to do with Armin's fever? If his Titan powers are enough to make him uneasy, then how will that even help Armin? I don't know, Ymir... if you end up killing him -"

Ymir interrupted her with a small click of the tongue. "- It won't kill him, Krista. You and I know much more than Eren, enough to know what Annie's connection to his fever was,"

"Yes, I know... but what if Annie's Titan powers had nothing to do with it?" the blonde asked with a slight panicked tone in her voice.

"If he dies, he dies. I said that before and I won't repeat myself anymore. Don't you think that was just me trying to repent for the many sins I've committed before and after we met. There's a lot about me that even you don't know,"

"Ymir, you have to be honest with me. I'm worried about -"

"- I'll tell you later, when the time is right. Trust in me; I highly doubt you'd look at me the same afterward... and I'll only tell you after -"

She hesitated for a moment.

"- after you tell me your real name,"

**o0o0o0o**

_'All those scars have left you cold,'_

_ The distant high pitched sound of a bird twittering happily was heard somewhere off to his right. He didn't know where he was; His eyes was closed, and it almost hurt to try to open them. He was so tired – why was that? He felt a warm hand slither onto his wrist and grip gingerly._

_ 'I'm here right now,'_

_ "- Yes, I'm fully aware that you're right next to me,"_

_ 'Are you still angry?'_

_ Armin opened his eyes and yawned softly, readjusting himself in the soft grass. The tips of the blades prickled at his skin with a nice tickling sensation, his bangs being blown into his eyes by the sudden breeze that brushed past them. He was now laying on his side, his head resting comfortably on the palm of his hand while the other reached out towards the person laying next to him. He felt nothing come in contact with his skin – the soft feel of grass at his fingertips was no longer there._

_ Though that person brought his senses back to him as he shyly intertwined fingers with Armin._

_ "Eren – do you love me?"_

_ The grip Eren had on his hand slightly tightened before softening once more._

_ 'Why are you asking me that here? Wait until morning comes – it'll show you how to live again, maybe even heal the broken mess you have become,'_

_ "I don't want to wait until morning comes,"_

_ The soft howl of wind brushing past his ear brought a shiver down his spine. He wasn't even sure whether the shiver was from discomfort or from a chill. He felt lazy and messy – or what Eren called, a 'broken mess' within. Armin watched as Eren pulled his hand up to his lips and kissed gently, the sudden warmth on his hand making him smile softly. Eren flashed him a warmhearted grin and intertwined their fingers once more, leaving another kiss on the blonde's knuckles._

_ Eren scooted closer to Armin while saying, 'The rain isn't falling, Armin. It never did – don't believe the lies that have been told. Do you really think anyone can replace you?'_

_ "I thought that you let go of me. I'm sorry,"_

_ 'No, there's no reason for you to be sorry. I can see the tears you've shed because of me. Your eyes may be blue, but the tears simply don't fit you,'_

_ "You've said that to me before," Armin giggled._

_ 'I repeat it because it's true,' the brunette said as he wrapped his arm around his lover's waist, bringing them closer together. 'It's like an ocean in your eyes... anyone can see all the fears you face. A storm that one simply can't pass through,'_

_ Armin snuggled comfortably against Eren's chest, their own intertwined hands being trapped within the warmth of their bodies. He felt Eren's grip on his hand tighten significantly._

_ 'You won't fall asleep, will you?'_

_ "I... I want to sleep," Armin muttered under his breath. "But it's kind of cold, anyways... so you shouldn't worry so much about it,"_

_ 'Aren't the shivers telling you something?'_

_ "Not that I'm aware of,"_

_ Eren chuckled softly before saying, 'Wake up, Armin,'_

* * *

**Extra Note: **I'm surprised I got this chapter uploaded on my birthday. Like damn, that last year went by pretty quick. Anyways, I've noticed that this fanfiction was paying more attention to the actual plot than to the romance between Eren and Armin. After chapter 24 (or 25), I'm going to start paying more attention to the Eremin/Jearmin relationships (Yes, Jean comes to 'save' the day). Sorry for the lack of romance and for breaking Armin so much ;-;

But I'd like to thank you for staying with me this far into the fanfiction.

And no I won't spoil the anime-only people with Krista's 'real name.' I only mention it because it effects things later on.


	25. XXV: Rainfall

**Note: **I think I let myself go with the whole 'rainfall is beauty' in the beginning. I do love the rain, but at the same time, I despise it. It's bittersweet. Ahahahah what the hell am I on? ;-; It's basically expressing how Eren feels while he's half-awake by Armin's side. He's mourning and waiting for Death to take his lover away from him. Yes, well...

... the ending of chapter 24 would like to say otherwise.

I'm getting most of the Eremin out of my system at the moment. Armin's recovered and I'm craving romance between the two, and now I have more time to write it. Spring break, how I love you so. I'm going to have more time to work on the fanfiction, rather than worry about homework and getting projects/papers done. Eeee, I'm actually excited. Not sure if that's a good thing.

Big sister Mikasa, a hint of Mikasa x Sasha, a covetous Jean, Levi's 'beautiful' language, romantic Eremin scenes, etc etc. I'm bombing this chapter to hell and all. Enjoy.

* * *

_**XXV: Rainfall**_

Droplets of water fell from the sky. Drip by drip, slithering down the blurred glass of the window and onto the windowsill. Dropping from the edge of the windowsill and splashing onto the blades of grass underneath; The process repeating, an ocean rising. Drenched in cold water, peace beginning to fray. Soldiers leaving their post without another look back, farmers facing the fear of their crops flooding, merchants hastening to find cloth to protect their goods. A somber day, not a ray of sunlight to show one the way home.

No way to live again.

The room was cold. It didn't matter if Armin was there next to him. It was still very cold. Shivers ran down Eren's spine, his shoulders shaking lightly. He didn't bother looking up from his arms. He only buried his face further into his forearms, the thrum of raindrops dancing on the windowsills and rooftops ringing in his ears. A soothing melody, taking the place of grief. They were just about the same, anyways. Not one ray of sunshine to bathe in – not a ray of happiness. There was no way morning would come again anytime soon... no way to live for hours to come. To breathe – to love again.

Oceans in one's eyes, scars over one's skin, fears flooding the face of one or the others earth. It hurts. Stinging, poking. Letting go. It hurts so much. Whether Death were to wait or collect in the next minute or so, it didn't matter anymore. There was no way to live again. No way for him to visit the afterlife – to come back to him and shower him with affection. Romancing and rebuilding his ego with that single thought was easy. Though it seemed so far away – too far for one to reach with their hand. Peace always leaves – it always frays within the hour, as if flames have come to destroy what was once cherished. Flames being darkness, the cause of the fraying being humanity's greed.

Oh, how much it hurts.

He didn't know how long it has been since he fell asleep. He remembered the infirmary, the warmth of it, the [almost] feverish touch of Armin's skin. Armin's pale face, quivering lip, tears leaking from the corners of his eyes. It was possible to cry in your sleep? Could he sense the others grief? Eren wished he could take Armin's place – he wished he would be he one suffering. Daybreak ceased to rise; Rainfall was darkness. Beautiful – mysterious – admirable – _enjoyable_. Rainfall was the opposite of solitude, related to the color black.

Mystifying blackness, mixed into the nebulous image of the weeping clouds outside, blurred into the beauty and thrumming of raindrops and wind.

_Beauty._

Eren wants to be able to touch Armin again – he wants to hug him, kiss him, whisper sweet things into his ears. How beautiful he was. He wants to be able to love Armin again... but it hurts too much to think of that. The constant throb at the back of his neck begged for him to stretch, but he reluctantly ignored it. Instead, he unburied his hand from under his arm and away from the covers, absentmindedly stretching his fingers. His hand had gone numb, probably from the amount of time he spent sleeping on it. Then again, he couldn't feel his arms at all – they had already gone numb from the weight of his head and from the coldness of the room. With a soft groan, he sat up in his seat and shook his arms in an attempt to get them to wake up again.

He didn't know how long he spent flexing and moving his arms and hands to get them to wake up, but by the time he could feel them again, his eyes had already adjusted to the lighting. It was no longer blurry, but he still hastened to rub them anyways. Blinking frantically, he scanned the room he was in; Sure enough, he was still in the infirmary, his rear beginning to feel sore after sitting in the same wooden chair for days. He saw that the candles around the room have been lit, the flames dancing beautifully in their glass prison, the warm glow pushing the darkness back in its place. He could hear the soft murmur of the nurses gossiping behind the office door, the occasional twitter of laughter ringing through the thick door.

Of course, they were having a great time. They had no worries whatsoever. To hell with them. Eren ignored the soft murmurs of their conversation and stretched out his back, grunting as it cracked loudly. Despite his back cracking, it still felt good to stretch, especially after spending hours in a somewhat comfortable hunched position next to his lover's sickbed. Tears welled up in his eyes as he yawned, his hand absentmindedly wiping them away as he readjusted himself for a bit before resting his head on his arms once more. Another grunt left his lips, uncomfortably rolling his shoulders as he sighed loudly. Even if the position he was in was comfortable, he still couldn't find himself feeling the need to sleep any longer.

Even so, he still stayed in the same position, this time fully aware of the sounds around him. The creaks of floorboards, the soft murmurs of nurses, the thrumming of raindrops and the howling wind from outside. That still wasn't enough to put him to sleep anymore. He sat there for what felt like hours, until he felt a sudden movement come from Armin. It wasn't enough to get him to lift his head; Armin was probably having another rough dream. He ignored it completely and went back to listening to the soothing beats of the raindrops splashing onto the window. There was another sound of rustling sheets before he felt something weave into his hair. It was warm, loving.

It couldn't be.

He looked up from his arms and rubbed his eyes furiously. After the world had come into focus, he met Armin's sleepy gaze. His eyes widened significantly.

It hurts.

Eren pounced on Armin, completely forgetting about his broken wrist, bandaged arms, and wet towel that was covered his stomach. He didn't care anymore; This was his only chance to embrace Armin. To his greatest relief, the blonde giggled softly before wrapping his arms around Eren's neck, cautious not to hurt his bandaged wrist in the process.

Once Eren had successfully straddled Armin's lap, he hoarsely whispered, "I missed you so much,"

"I missed you too,"

Armin said no more, mainly because he didn't have a chance to continue. The brunette immediately kissed his lover, their lips messily crashing together. Eren rest his arms on either side of Armin's head, trapping him on the spot. As hurried as the kiss was, it was still enjoyable for the both of them. Armin ran his hand through the brunette's hair, enjoying the feeling of his lover's lips pressed against his. It's been too long since he kissed Eren – it felt so comforting, so reassuring. Now was the time to rejoice.

Everything will be all right.

Eren broke away from the kiss and said, "I'm so sorry -" he pecked at the blonde's lips once more, "- I'm so, so sorry -" he continued to press light kisses against Armin's lips, chin, and nose, earning a soft giggle.

Armin smiled as he pressed a light kiss on Eren's lips. "What are you apologizing for? There's no reason for you to be sorry,"

"Armin," Eren breathed, "I'm so sorry -" he rest their foreheads together, his heart skipping a beat or two as he did so. He barely felt any heat from Armin's forehead; His fever truly was gone. "- I'm here for you,"

"Don't let go of me,"

"Never,"

He reluctantly lifted his head away from Armin's to gaze into his eyes. Turquoise finally reunited with sky blue, dancing beautifully in time with the raindrops splashing against the window. Armin's sky blue eyes twinkled lightly at the sight of him. Despite how dull the lighting was in the room, he could have sworn that Armin's face was glowing. Eren smiled softly before kissed the blonde's forehead, enjoying the small tingling sensation of Armin's fingers lightly tugging his hair. Armin untangled his fingers from his lover's hair and wrapped his arm around his neck instead, pulling him into a closer embrace.

Eren was cautious not to allow his own weight to pour onto Armin in fear that he'd hurt him, but over time, he completely forgot that concern. He reached down to Armin's stomach and grabbed the wet towel that was neatly folded there, throwing it aside without a damn in the world where it went. Instead of laying comfortably on his lover, he whisked the blonde's arms away from his neck. They switched positions; Despite the bed being very narrow, they lay next to each other, their legs weaved together perfectly. Eren wrapped his arms around the blonde's frail body, pulling him into a tighter embrace.

Armin rest his forehead comfortably against Eren's firm chest, hearing the faint beating of his heart. The steady tempo of his heartbeat was soothing – for some reason, it brought tears to the corners of his eyes. The room was very cold, but not a shiver ran down his spine. The heat he felt was probably from Eren, no doubt. He was careful not to apply pressure to his bandaged wrist and held it up against his own chest. Eren nuzzled softly into his hair, absentmindedly planting a kiss every here and there.

"I love you, Armin," Eren muttered into his hair. Armin looked up from his chest to meet Eren's concerned look. "I love you so much -" he leaned down and planted a quick kiss to Armin's lips, "I'll never hurt you again. Let me love you when you come undone,"

"Eren, what am I to you?" Armin asked as he rest his head back against the brunette's chest, biting his lip in an attempt to keep in the tears.

Eren chuckled softly before replying, "Everything,"

That did it.

The tears that Armin had been holding back immediately broke out of their restraints and leaked out of his eyes. He began to cry freely against Eren's chest, almost instantly heating the fabric of his shirt. As the blonde sobbed, Eren let out a low grunt of concern.

"Why are you crying?"

Armin ignored his question and only sobbed harder. After all the things that happened between them, they were finally back together. Eren loved him, and that was all that really mattered at the moment. He was no longer worried about Eren loving their superior, he was no longer concerned about the paperwork that awaited him or the amount of meetings he missed. The tears that he had been holding back, the tears that were caught up in his sleep. It was reassuring to hear what he truly meant to Eren. It enlightened his heart to be in Eren's arms again. It felt great to love another person, but it felt even better to be loved by that same person.

"Armin?"

The blonde sniffled softly against Eren's chest, ignoring the sympathetic hand that caressed the back of his head. Eren pulled away from the embrace to look at the blonde's face, his hand finding is way to his lover's chin and pushing it up. It hurt him to see Armin shedding his tears. He was sniffling softly, his shoulders lightly jerking every now and then. Eren pulled Armin up and away from his chest, to where their eyes were now at the same level. Armin mewled softly and tried to wipe the tears away, but Eren's hand met his halfway and stopped him from doing so. As they intertwined fingers, Eren brought Armin's hand up to his mouth and kissed softly.

"Eren, I'm sorry -"

"- Don't apologize to me. I'm the one that should be sorry,"

The brunette planted butterfly kisses over Armin's face, on every inch of skin he could reach, mainly because Armin actually let him. He kissed his nose, cheeks, eyelid, jaw – anything he could touch, anything but his lips. The salty taste of Armin's tears lingered over his lips, the foreign taste attacking his own taste buds. As much as it hurt to see him cry, he continued to kiss anyway, ignoring the knot of grief at the pit of his stomach. Was it his fault that Armin had cried so much the past week or two? It also hurt to think that. Armin shuddered softly as the brunette planted one last kiss on his eyelid before moving to his lips. He paused for a bit, their lips only centimeters away from each other.

He wanted to give Armin the chance to pull away if he really wanted to. To Eren's greatest surprise, Armin was the one that leaned into the kiss first, his arm wrapping around Eren's neck and pulling them into a close embrace. Eren tightened his hold around Armin's body once more, though he was careful not to apply too much pressure to the bandaged wrist that was pressed against their chests. Their kiss was passionate; Lips moving on their own accord, slowly and lovingly. The tears running down Armin's face had already stopped, yet they were still lingering at the corners of his eyes.

As Armin broke away from the kiss, Eren breathed, "I promise I'll never hurt you again,"

"Didn't you say that before?" Armin giggled.

"I say it because I know I'll keep that promise," the brunette replied as he caught Armin's eye. "You know you're important to me,"

Armin snuggled comfortably against Eren's forehead with his own and muttered, "I love you, Eren,"

"I love you too," Eren said, pressing another gentle kiss against Armin's eyelid and tasting the saltiness of his tears again.

Eren listened to the sound of raindrops dancing on the rooftops, the steady tempo making his eyelids start to feel heavy. They exchanged gentle kisses and whispered sweet things into each others ears, the sounds of raindrops and wind guiding them into a long slumber. They were finally together, with naught but the sound of rain outside and the warmth of their affection to comfort them.

Rainfall has never been so beautiful before.

**o0o0o0o**

Mikasa rest her head on one folded hand, watching as the raindrops splashed against the window. As each raindrop hit the window, they fell downwards, racing each other to the very end of the glass. As boring as it was, it still kept Mikasa somewhat entertained. The mess hall was packed with soldiers, as usual, and she was surprised that Sasha hadn't come to steal her food yet. As she reached down to grab her loaf of bread, she heard the clatter of a food tray right next to her hitting the wooden surface of the table.

_'Speak of the devil,'_

"Morning, Mikasa!" Sasha beamed, taking a seat on the bench next to her. "Where's Connie and Jean? I thought they'd be here by now,"

Mikasa looked away from the window and grabbed her cup, lifting it up to her mouth while saying, "Not sure, I think it's too early,"

"It's really cold, don't you think?" Sasha said as she stuffed her mouth with bread.

"Yes, very,"

The raven's stomach rumbled almost painfully as she watched Sasha eat. She brushed it off and drank some more water, though her stomach clenched painfully as she did so. Wiping her mouth, she turned away from Sasha and peered through the mass of soldiers in an attempt to find Connie.

"Mikasa, aren't you going to eat your food?"

"No, I'm not hungry, I had a lot to eat for dinner last night," Mikasa replied, yawning deeply as she did so.

The brunette said nothing more, instead she reached for the loaf of bread on Mikasa's tray. Just as she thought. Mikasa sighed softly and rest her head back on the same folded hand. She closed her heavy eyelids, trying her hardest to ignore the constant pain in the pit of her stomach. Whether she was just reluctant or she was punishing herself, god knows what, yet she still ignored the need to eat. She was starting to question herself about it.

"Mikasa?"

The raven looked back at Sasha and started, "Ye - ?!"

Sasha had interrupted her reply with her bread. She stuffed the loaf of bread into Mikasa's mouth, ignoring the hand that gripped her wrist tightly.

"Don't lie to me saying that you ate dinner yesterday. You gave it to me, remember?"

She gained no response.

"You're starting to worry me, Mikasa. Eat,"

Mikasa growled in defeat and took the bread, ripping off a piece with her teeth and chewing on it slowly. Her stomach eased up a bit as she swallowed her food. She used to wonder why Sasha loved food so much, but now she knows why.

"You know, you're always worrying about Eren," the brunette said as she went back to her own tray. "Think about it; If you're going to protect Eren, don't you need the strength to do so?"

She still gained no response.

With a small 'tch', Sasha grabbed her spoon and started to eat her soup. A small shiver from the cold weather ran down her spine as her lips came in contact with the sudden warmth. Mikasa saw this and ripped a rather large piece from her bread before putting it down and making for her scarf instead. She unwrapped the scarf from her neck and draped it over the nape of Sasha's neck. This surprised the brunette, to the point where she'd actually put down her spoonful of soup.

"What're you doing?" Sasha asked.

Mikasa started to wrap the scarf around her friend's neck while answering, "You said it was cold, no?"

With a soft giggle, Sasha nodded vigorously and went back to eating her soup, her free hand gripping onto the scarf. This pleased Mikasa; As much as she loved that scarf, it felt nice to see someone else enjoy its comfort and warmth. They talked for some time while they ate their breakfast, but not too long after did Jean arrive.

As Jean lowered his tray in the seat across from Mikasa, the raven asked, "Jean? Have you seen Eren?"

Jean rolled his eyes as he said, "He's probably with Armin again,"

"Ooh, that sounded like you were jealous!" Sasha snickered.

Jean blushed softly in embarrasment as he retorted, "As if!"

"Eren isn't showing up for breakfast anymore..." Mikasa lowered her eyes back to her own tray before continuing, "... I think I should check up on him..."

Mikasa ignored their bickering and reached up to nuzzle against her scarf, biting her lip softly once she remembered that she had given it to Sasha for the time being. Instead, she rest her hand on her chest, smiling softly as she ate her breakfast for the first time in what felt like years.

**o0o0o0o**

Eren didn't know how long they were asleep, but by the time he woke up, it was already dark outside. Darker than it was when they had fallen asleep. The rain had already stopped, yet the nebulous image of the clouds outside were still tainted black. The windows were blotched dark gray, making it nearly impossible to see outside clearly. Eren yawned softly before allowing his head to fall back to the warm pillow, almost instinctively nuzzling against Armin's forehead. The blonde's bangs tickled his skin, the mild warmth comforting him greatly. It felt great to finally have his lover back in his arms again.

They weren't even allowed to cuddle so comfortably before this disaster happened; They were always so busy. It felt nice to be so care free and relaxed. Their reunion couldn't have been better. Armin grunted softly as he readjusted for a bit, though he hardly bothered trying to open his eyes. He was still very tired, which amused Eren greatly. How could he still be tired after spending so much time asleep?

Eren kissed Armin's forehead and muttered, "I'm glad you're finally awake,"

"How long have we been asleep?" Armin asked weakly as he tried to prop himself up on one arm.

The blonde immediately let out a small hiss of discomfort as he accidentally applied pressure to his broken wrist. He held it close to his chest and laid back down on his side again, yawning softly as he met Eren's gaze. Armin smiled and leaned in to kiss the brunette. A small shiver of excitement ran down his spine as their lips met – it's been too long since he's kissed Eren so calmly. He'll be itching for some time alone with Eren after he got out of the infirmary, time to be spent talking and cuddling with his lover. It was just so perfect.

"Armin, are you still tired?"

He shook his head and replied, "No, not really, just hungry,"

Eren huffed in a silent laugh. "Of course you'd be hungry, how long have you been in here? A week?"

Armin groaned softly into the pillow, "I need a shower... I can't believe I went through that whole week without one,"

"You sound like Heichou," the brunette grinned as he sat up on the bed, removing his arms from around his lover. "Don't worry about it – you don't smell that bad,"

Armin whined softly in disapproval from his comment and from the loss of his warmth. Eren stretched out his back with a grunt of discomfort, watching as Armin slowly sat up from the bed. They were having minor issues with sitting right next to each other on the bed. Now that Eren looked at it, the beds in the infirmary were _tiny_. He scanned the room and saw that his chair had been moved to the side, his jacket was folded neatly on the counter next to them, and the door to the nurse's office was halfway open. Eren blushed softly in embarrassment; Were the nurses the only ones that saw them sleeping together like that, or...?

His thoughts were interrupted as soon as he heard Armin's confused voice, "Do I just...? Should I contact the nurses, or -"

"- I'm pretty sure they know you've recovered," Eren cut in immediately, looking back over his shoulder at his lover.

He was greeted with a gentle kiss, a small smile forming on his lips in the process. Armin pecked at his cheek before retreating to his side of the bed, yawning deeply before stretching his arms and legs.

"... I'm starting to question what kind of illness I had..." the blonde muttered softly.

Eren chewed on his lip. "That would be something to discuss later... it wasn't the medication from the infirmary that saved you,"

"Then what did?"

"... I'm not unsure... not quite certain, though,"

There was a small silence between the two. The only thing that was heard was the steady tempo of the clock ticking above them and the faint sound of conversation coming from the office. Eren decided to brush it off his shoulder for now; The situation with Ymir and his blood wasn't that big of a concern to him at the moment. Instead of continuing the conversation under that topic, he scooted over and sat next to Armin, playfully pecking at his cheek right after. Armin turned his head back towards him and gave a warm smile.

The brunette wrapped his arms around Armin once more. "You can't believe -" he kissed Armin's nose and pulled him into a close embrace, "- how much I've missed you,"

"I love you, Eren,"

He kissed Armin lightly, a smile creeping on his lips as he felt Armin's free hand run along the side of his face and into his hair. Armin tilted his head a bit further to deepen the kiss, a blush scattering over his cheeks once he felt Eren lightly suckle on his bottom lip. They continued to kiss passionately, their lips lovingly moving at the same pace. The blonde completely forgot that they were still in the infirmary – or rather, he didn't care that a stray nurse could walk in on them at any moment. All he wanted now was to feel Eren's lips on his. He tugged lightly on the brunette's hair, his blush only intensifying once he felt Eren's appendage drag over his bottom lip. Armin granted him entrance and moaned softly as Eren's tongue met with his. However, as soon as it started, it stopped.

"Well, damn, I didn't think I'd walk in on my soldiers eating each others faces off,"

They immediately jumped apart, Eren unwrapping his arms from the blonde and Armin untangling his hand from Eren's hair. Levi stood at the door with an irritated look on his face, accompanied by Erwin who was yawning softly into the back of his hand. Armin scooted an inch or two away from Eren in pure embarrasment. What's more embarrassing than your superiors walking in on you and your boyfriend kissing? Damn.

"We're sorry to interrupt," Erwin smiled. "Would it be better if we came by later on?"

"N- No, it's fine..." the brunette muttered awkwardly.

Levi clucked his tongue with frustration and made his way to Armin's bed, saying, "Either way, there wouldn't have been a 'later on', so deal with us for a while,"

Once Erwin and Levi brought up their chairs and sat themselves by the two lovers (though Levi was quite reluctant to do so), Eren asked, "Er... I'm not trying to be rude or anything, but... what brought you here?"

Erwin sat back in his chair and replied, "I heard about Armin's recovery from one of the nurses during dinner today -" _('Holy shit, we were asleep for that long?') _"- though it was just yesterday when they were predicting his due date,"

"...I was... on the verge of death?"

"Enough of that," Levi snapped, "Let's keep this short, sweet, and to the point. I didn't get my ass dragged out of my office for nothing,"

The small silence that followed his last words signaled that he could continue.

"Arlert -" _("S- Sir!" Armin squeaked,) _"- We want to know what happened before you came down with a fever. Or, more importantly, what caused a fever so intense, up to the point where you were going to die from it? Why did you stay alive for so long?"

"Ah..." Armin waited a couple of second to recollect his memories before saying, "... I'll start by the order you asked. What happened before I got sick... well, I'm not quite proud of what I've done -" he held up his bandaged arms, only earning a very mild look of concern from his superiors, "- but before I even touched that blade, I had a rather nasty encounter with Annie,"

Eren ground his teeth in anger while Erwin asked, "Annie Leonhart? Wasn't she one of the top ten graduates from the 104th Trainee Squad?"

"God knows how you remember all that," Levi murmured.

"Yes, she was close to me at some point -" _(His superiors exchanged looks) _"- n- no, not in that sense. I'm completely clueless when it comes down to why she came down to Karanese. She's in the Military Force; She'd be in serious trouble if they found out that she was here,"

"That concerns us because?" the raven asked with a bored voice.

"That happens to concern our _smart _and _hardworking superiors _who _stay on task _because they would have noticed that one of their soldiers went missing," Armin answered bitterly, lightly emphasizing a couple of key points on the way. "Let me put this simply: If we actually had a _decent government _without corrupted officials, they would have taken note that one of their soldiers were gone. They would have mentioned it in a meeting or two, because I know that conversation under the 57th Expedition is still going on,"

"I swear to god, if it wasn't that fever that made you man the fuck up, then I don't know what did," Levi growled, earning a surprised flinch from the blonde.

"N- No, sir... I'm only pointing out that the Military Brigade has a couple of loose ends..."

"You mean the Bitch Brigade,"

Eren smiled softly at this retort, and so did Erwin.

"The most important question now is why the Military didn't report their missing soldier, or soldiers, depending on the information we don't have," Armin continued, "On to your second question, I honestly don't know what caused that fever, myself -" _(Levi rolled his eyes and muttered, "This is hopeless,) _"- However, I do know that whatever Annie injected me with was new to humanity itself,"

Erwin raised an eyebrow and asked harshly, "She injected you? With what?"

"I don't know," Armin squeaked, "If it was poison, I would have been dead within the hour. The substance was very hot... it felt like hell. Then there's the third question... whatever she injected me with, it could have agreed on some terms with the human DNA, while the others threatened my life. In other words, whatever she injected me with was related to humans in one way or another,"

"So if it's not poison, then what could it be? A formula of some sort?"

"I... I don't know..." the blonde answered miserably.

Eren bit his lip before saying, "On the topic of formulas and humans or whatever... there's someone that will be able to help us, and she's very close to us and easy to contact..."

Everyone's attention was now on him, and only him.

"... Ymir must know a lot more than she's leading on,"

* * *

**Extra Note: **So I timed myself on how long it took me to write/edit this chapter (don't judge me I was curious Q_Q). Apparently it took me a total of 6 hours with writing, rewriting, and proofreading/editing. I'm not sure if I should be proud of that or what. T_T

Should I continue writing the Mikasa/Sasha relationship or no?

One last thing: The details of Armin's fever will be continued later on in the fanfiction (since we don't have any of the other shifters with us besides Ymir - who obviously doesn't want them knowing her secret before Krista - there's not much to tell). I don't even know if humans were aware of DNA or genes or whatever at that time. I suck at history. Sue me.


	26. XXVI: Explanation

**Note: **Listening to DOA (Attack on Titan OST) in a lower pitch can be so beautiful and inspiring. What. Gah, fuck technology and this witchery we call a '3DS'. Q_Q It's really funny... if you pay attention, you'll notice that I sometimes rearrange the words of a song and put it in my writing. I sometimes do it without knowing, myself. Oh my god... I found that way too funny. This is why we can't have nice things. Brownie points to whoever can guess what song I hinted at on certain chapters c: Besides all that, I'm surprised that I've kept this fanfiction somewhat clean (language based). For some reason, I really enjoy writing the rivalry between Eren/Jean... and did I mention I'm quite fond of writing in love triangles? *ahem* HINT *ahem* Ah fuck I'm terrible. I need to write more Eren/Jean in here... still debating whether I should have Eren beat Jean's ass for creeping on his boyfriend or not. Oh well. And yes, I plan on keeping up with people's birthdays in this fanfiction. Krista's birthday is on the 15th of January (I think), and this chapter takes place a week into January... so yeah! More Ymir x Krista? I'm feeling like yuri for some reason. It won't be major, but it'll be here.

There's not much to warn about in this chapter. There's just Levi's thug vocabulary, plot progression (I want to get some things pinned down), Eren/Jean (rivalry and shit), a dash of Eruri (I need my fix I'm sorry), and a hint of big sister Mikasa (I'm not abusing her anymore, yay). A rather long chapter compared to my other ones (I guess), but worth the read. But there's just one warning I'd like to give a little early on: Don't think that there won't be any hard smut written before chapter 30 comes by. hintity hint, hint. There's also a lot of dialogue in this chapter... oh my god.

*throws confetti* **Manga spoilers coming your way ***evil laughter* though it is hidden in the dialogue...**  
**

Fun Fact: I've never read/watched yuri before, so I'm completely clueless when I try to write a Ymir x Krista scene. Sigh.

* * *

_**XXVI: Explanation**_

Levi sat back in his chair crossed one leg over the other, folding his arms as well. He gave Eren a skeptical look. First of all, he didn't know who the hell Ymir was supposed to be. Second, he wasn't in the mood to hunt someone down out of the few hundred soldiers there at Karanese, or in any other district. If she was supposedly 'easy' to contact, then she shouldn't be so far away from the base. Eren squirmed a little under the intensity of his glare and looked over to Erwin with a slight hint of plead in his eyes. Erwin immediately saw this and turned to Levi.

"Surely we should find Ymir?"

Levi rolled his eyes. "I'm too tired to go find someone that this brat knows. If anything, he should be the one that hunts her down. I don't even know who the fuck this soldier is,"

"I- If you'd like, I could go find her..." Armin offered. "I think her dorm number is in the one hundreds..."

Erwin immediately declined his offer. "You just got out of your sickbed,"

A small rustle was heard nearby them. A nurse had walked in to retrieve the extra needles and bandages that they had been using for Armin. She piled the rolls of bandages into her arms before reaching for the needles, though she was quite hesitant on doing so. The mountain of supplies she carried looked as if it was going to fall at any moment.

The raven looked over his shoulder and said, "You. You're a nurse here, right? Do me a favor,"

It sounded more like a demand that it did a question. This made the nurse flinch at being addressed to with such a harsh – yet monotonous – voice, the pile of supplies falling from her arms. Some of the bandages had rolled under his chair. Levi sighed and shook his head, unfolding his arms to reach down and collect the bandages. This made Eren's eyes slightly widen with surprise; he didn't think that someone like Levi would give so much as a damn about another person's mistake. Then again, he_ was _a clean freak. Erwin took note of this, as well, but due to his injured arm, he did nothing.

As Levi handed her the bandages, he said, "I need you to find a certain soldier for us, and be quick about it. Just shove these up someone's ass and go find Ymir, a graduate from the 104th Trainee Squad -" (_"So you have been paying attention," Erwin grinned,_) "- Worry about those needles later. We don't want broken glass next, do we?"

She shook her head vigorously and said, "Is she in the barracks or dorms?"

"Dorms," Levi turned back to Armin and asked, "One hundred?"

"Around that number," Armin squeaked.

"Of course," the nurse muttered shyly. "But I won't guarantee that I'll be back as fast as you want me to, sir..."

With that said, she was off; She dropped off the bandages in the supplies cabinet and hastened over the threshold. As she closed the door quietly behind her, Levi gave Eren a skeptical look. The brunette noticed that there were dark bags under Levi's eyes – Armin noticed this to, for he and Eren exchanged the same looks. It was either Levi didn't get his morning coffee, or he simply overworked himself. Eren couldn't deny that he was concerned about his superior.

"Heichou, do you want me to get you some coffee?" Eren asked hopefully.

"We ran out of coffee, you little shit," the raven spat.

"Levi -" Erwin started, but he was immediately cut off.

"- Let's get this done and over with, brat. Just answer me this: What does Ymir have anything to do with Arlert?"

Eren shifted a bit in his seat. "It kind of goes back to what Armin said before... he was injected by something, but it wasn't poison. He thought it was related to humans in one way or another... and I think it is. Ymir came in with Krista and asked me about Annie... something to do with blood and heat,"

"I didn't ask you about your filthy midnight fantasies," Levi sighed, earning an amused look from both Erwin and Armin.

"Not in that sense," Eren muttered bitterly. "I guess Ymir decided to play doctor and drew some of my blood... and injected it into Armin right afterward,"

Armin buried his face into his hand and murmured, "How can you say that with a straight face?"

There was a small silence. Both of the blondes were still processing this in their minds, whereas Levi simply sat there without giving a single damn. However, despite the fact that he really didn't care, he couldn't deny that it sparked his interest. Armin's face was extremely pale now; He couldn't believe what he heard.

"You're saying you actually let her inject your blood into Arlert knowing full well of what might happen afterward?" Erwin deadpanned, "If Hanji were here, she'd be throwing a fit – Eren, isn't the fact that your Titan powers run through your veins of any importance to you at all?"

"Sir... she said it would help Armin..."

"It's good that it did, but the real question right now isn't why you let her do it. The question we need to know is how that helped Armin, and how it'll effect him later on in life. Could he turn into a Titan shifter as well, with your blood coursing in his?"

Armin's heart clenched painfully with fear. He looked at his feet and bit his lip as the confusing fact dawned upon him; He had the risk of becoming a Titan shifter, as well. As fascinating as it may sound, it was actually scary to him. Scary in so many ways – what if he lost control of his Titan form like Eren did and killed one of his comrades? It hurts too much to think of that. Just as Eren opened his mouth to continue the conversation, he was interrupted as the door swung open. At the doorway stood the nurse and Ymir (though the height difference was quite amusing).

"You called?" Ymir asked dully as she walked over to the group, leaving the nurse to close the door and scurry into the office. "Judging by the people here, I'm guessing I'm in some sort of trouble,"

"Not entirely," Erwin smiled brightly.

Levi scowled at his fake smile and said, "You're Ymir, right? We just want simple answers. You're in no trouble at all unless you manage to piss me off,"

Ymir rolled her eyes and said, "I won't lie to you and say that I'll be a good little girl. But -" she paused for a moment to admire the unimpressed look Levi wore on his face, "- for the sake of my beloved _superior_, I'll try my best,"

She had purposely emphasized the word 'superior' to mock him. He was fully aware of this, and so was Erwin, but he brushed it off his shoulder.

Before Erwin could defend his lover, the raven said, "I'm too tired to fuck about. Take a seat, stand, lay on the shitty ground, I don't care what you do, but you're still involved in this conversation,"

"What do you want, then?"

Armin was the first to talk this time. "Ymir... how are Annie's injection and Eren's blood related?"

"I'll only tell you what I possibly can -" she looked at all four of them, taking an extra moment once her eyes laid upon Eren, "- and what's necessary. Sounds all right to you?"

"Anything," Erwin replied.

Ymir placed one hand on her hip while the other hung unused at her side. A rather casual position, yet comfortable when standing. They knew she didn't plan on staying long.

"This is very simple, and I highly doubt that both Commander Erwin and Armin would have any issues processing it," Ymir continued, "Armin – think back at the day she ambushed you. When she injected you, did it feel fervent, or even painful as it ran through your veins?"

Armin nodded slowly, and she turned to the brunette to continue, "Eren, it's a fact it's extremely hot when you're in your Titan, and don't bullshit with me saying it isn't. We already know that Titans produce very high temperatures. Now do you see how those two connect, at the very least?"

Eren bit his lip before saying, "I remember Hanji telling me once that anything besides waste and saliva that comes out of my body should be very high in temperature, thanks to my Titan powers,"

"Now put the two together; Let's say Annie got some sort of formula, or whatever you'd like to call it, and forced it into Armin's system. Then, I inject Eren's blood into him, meaning that it would all stack up in the , right? I'm pretty sure Armin would have died with both of those dangerous substances in his body,"

Erwin's eyes narrowed slightly before he gasped and said, "... This makes sense. If Annie's the Female Titan, and she injected some sort of her own DNA into Armin -"

"- then adding another Titan shifter's DNA would only cancel each other out," Armin finished for him.

Ymir gave an amused smile. "You're both very bright,"

"But... how did I live for so long...?" Armin asked.

"Armin, you're a lot stronger than you think," she continued, "and... despite everything I know, this is just a wild thought from the back of my head; If Eren and Annie can handle the Titan's powers within them, then maybe other humans can as well. Maybe their DNA is altered in one way or another... don't you think that makes sense? Or do I sound like a madwoman?"

"... No... No, you're correct..." Erwin said with an absent portion of mind. He processed this new information for a bit before continuing, "Ymir... how do you know this?"

She turned her back on all of them and started towards the door. "I am a mere thief, Commander. A thief that knows more than an average seventeen-year-old should... one that will probably give Squad Leader Hanji something to brew upon for the next month or so,"

"Wait! You can't just leave like that!" Eren called angrily.

"Just watch me,"

The door slammed shut, and Ymir was gone. Eren was left utterly bewildered; This was something he still needed to process, something that seemed so complex to him. In reality, it wasn't that hard to obtain, but Eren thought otherwise. He gave Armin a pleading look, who only shook his head. He saw that his lover's face was pale – probably shocked by the reality. The brunette looked back to his superiors to question them, but his words were caught in his throat. The sight before him was almost cute.

Levi's head was rested nicely upon Erwin's shoulder, his lips slightly parted and his breathing calm. To think that Levi would actually allow himself to fall asleep at such an important time. It was almost careless. He saw that Armin had a faint smile on his lips, admiring the sight of Lance Corporal Levi sleeping on another man's shoulder. It was all too adorable.

"Commander Erwin, sir?" Armin asked.

Erwin held up a hand as if telling him to stay silent. "I'm thinking of carrying him to his dorm, but he'd kill me if anyone saw that,"

"He can sleep on one of the infirmary beds," Eren suggested. "It's really comfortable, and I don't think he'll be too happy if he's woken up again after a long day,"

Erwin gave one last look to his lover before saying, "Yes, I'm sure he'd like that,"

**o0o0o0o**

The next morning at breakfast was the same for Mikasa, though this time, she's actually eating. She watched with minor amusement as Sasha and Connie fought over the same loaf of bread, the bickering between them getting funnier by the minute. It was late in the morning, so there weren't many soldiers there. Thank god, too; If one of her superiors had been in breakfast that morning and witnessed Sasha and Connie making stupid poses and such, they were bound to get skinned alive. The dining hall was somewhat empty since most of the soldiers had left to the dorms/barracks or to attend duty in the castle or city. Mikasa tucked her chin into her scarf and yawned deeply, wondering where Jean could have been. Usually he'd be eating with them, socializing, or even betting on who would take the last bit of food (between Sasha and Connie).

It was a rather cheerful morning despite the things that have been going on in the castle. Mikasa couldn't deny that it hurt a bit to be left alone by Eren in the mornings for breakfast, but it was necessary. Armin needed him, but god knows how long Armin would last with his illness. One can withstand a virus for only so long. As her eyes faded for a moment while she got caught up in her thoughts, she heard footsteps next to her. She looked up from her tray, her eyes widening as she saw who the visitors were.

It was Eren, along with Armin, who looked perfectly fine.

Mikasa smiled and said, "You must be hungry after all that time in the infirmary,"

Before Armin could respond, Connie had thrown his arms around him. At first he thought it was a hug, and so did Eren, until he was spun around and saw that he was holding a loaf of bread in his hand. Connie wasn't greeting him so warmly after his absence; He was being used as a human shield.

"Connie, I'm hungry, damn it!" Sasha whined as she tried to get around Armin.

Connie simply held on to the blonde's shoulders and rearranged himself to the side furthest away from Sasha. "You're going to have to get through Armin! He's made out of steel, you know!"

Armin laughed at this comment, and so did Eren and Mikasa. Eren rest his hand on Connie's shoulder and gripped lightly to signal him to let go.

"I don't think that's really comfortable. He just got out of the infirmary," the brunette reasoned.

He opened his mouth to say something, but he was immediately interrupted as Connie said, "She'll kill me, Eren!"

Armin started, "Could I -"

"- I'm starving..." Sasha pouted, immediately cutting him off.

With a soft mewl of disapproval, Armin shook Connie's hand off his shoulder. He turned back around to Sasha, only to see that Krista was right next to her, holding a loaf of bread. Sasha didn't notice her (since she was so tiny) until she felt a light tap on her shoulder.

"Sasha, you're hungry, aren't you? I got you this – hopefully it's enough,"

The brunette's eyes widened as she snatched the bread out of Krista's hands, squealing, "I keep telling you, she's a goddess! A goddess!"

Krista smiled brightly and turned to Armin, saying, "Did you like the flowers I got you?"

"Yes, they were nice," the blonde replied happily. "Hey – where's Ymir, anyway? I thought she'd be with you,"

Krista's smile ever so slightly faltered as she looked from Eren to Mikasa, who were engaged in conversation, and back to Sasha and Connie, who were bickering vividly. She motioned for Armin to follow her to a nearby table to distance themselves from the group. Armin was quite hesitant about it at first, but he decided to give Sasha's 'goddess' a chance. Krista wasn't one to be so shady.

"Is there something wrong?"

"No, not really," the smaller blonde continued, "I'm just worried about Ymir... I mean, she's been really shady ever since she got back from the infirmary yesterday,"

As Armin nodded slowly, she continued, "Armin... why has Ymir been acting that way? I have the idea that she went to go visit you with that nurse... did it have something to do with her injecting you with...?"

"Yes, something like that," he replied before she could finish her sentence. "I'm not sure why she's been acting like that, though -" he hastened to finish his sentence as he saw Krista's eyes droop a bit, "She's not in trouble or anything, I think she just has a lot on her mind right now. Have you tried talking to her?"

She bit her lip and said, "... Yes, but she only replies with two or three word answers, kind of like when we first met..."

The taller blonde saw the faintest trace of tears in the depths of her eyes. He gave a warm smile and said, "Hey, it's nothing for you to worry about. I know what you're thinking – Ymir isn't hurt in any way possible, nor will she be anytime soon. You mean a lot to her, and I'm pretty sure she wouldn't want to see you agonizing yourself like this,"

"You really know how to comfort someone," Krista stated cheerfully. "I'm really glad – thank you so much!"

Armin chuckled lightly and nodded his head towards the group. He noticed that Mikasa had been watching them; He couldn't deny that he found it somewhat creepy, but her reasons were probably good... whatever they may be.

"Let's go back, yes? I'm really hungry,"

"Oh, sure!"

**o0o0o0o**

Jean leaned back against the cold stone pillar like he usually did every morning. The sun was barely visible behind the mass of clouds, the usual weak ray or two peeking out from between each cloud every now and then. He held a white rose in his hand; The petals lightly fluttered with each breeze that brushed by him, the tips of thorns tickling his skin through his thick gloves. He silently prayed for Marco's happiness, paying his full respects to the decreased. Since the weather was terrible and threatened to drown them in rain, he didn't have the chance to visit the graveyard. He peered into the puffy clouds and sighed deeply.

_'Marco... why the hell do I have any interest in Armin? I'm betraying you, aren't I?'_

That thought alone was enough to crush his ego; He immediately pushed it out of his mind and gave one last doubtful look to the rose he held in his hand. He had promised Marco he'd bring him good news next, but he highly doubt that he'd have anything good to say about life next. The most he's done was piss off his crush's boyfriend; He even questioned himself about his feelings for Armin. Was it the fact that Mikasa treated him less than a soldier? He simply gave up on Mikasa and found his feelings for Marco later than he should have. But wouldn't it have hurt much more if he grew attached to Marco right before he died? Jean took another deep breath and closed his eyes.

_'Just look at that... I'm a 'leader' who doesn't even know his own feelings,'_

He opened his eyes again and stood from the pillar.

_'It's really bad to say that he reminds me of you. To hell with it all,'_

Just as he was about to tuck the rose away in his pocket, he heard the shuffle of footsteps nearby him. He cocked his head in that direction and saw that those footsteps were coming towards him. Only a couple of feet away was Ymir; It completely surprised him. Why is Ymir suddenly visiting him when she showed hardly any interest in him at all? More importantly, where was Krista?

"What do you want?" Jean asked.

Ymir stopped right in front of him and smirked. "What, you don't hate me, do you?"

"No, it's not that," he sighed as he leaned against the pillar once more. "I'm just surprised. It's rare to see you without Krista,"

"She's probably eating breakfast,"

"Is that so?"

A small pause.

Ymir leaned back on the pillar right next to him, earning a reproachful look. "Hey... Jean, right? You've been out here a lot lately..."

"You've noticed,"

"Douche," she rolled her eyes and continued, "I just wanted to know if you've seen anyone around here lately. You're dangerously close to the entrance, you know – I highly doubt that anyone shows up for duty there anymore,"

"I haven't run into anyone besides the occasional couple or two sneaking out to get a good fuck after breakfast," he replied.

The brunette let out an amused huff. "I bet you'd love to see that,"

"Just how horrible do you think I am?" Jean complained. "Is that all you came here for?"

"If you enjoy my company, I'd be more than happy to leave,"

He rolled his eyes and stood up correctly, lifting the rose he had in his hand and showing it to Ymir. "Here, do you want this? I found it on my way here, but I can give less of a shit where it goes,"

"Why would you give it to me?" Ymir asked suspiciously as she gave the rose (and Jean) a highly disgusted look.

"One, you look pretty lonely without Krista, and two, you can tell your lover you picked it for her," he gave the rose a light wave before continuing, "Take it or leave it. Either way, it wouldn't matter; Everything you touch dies,"

"Asshole," Ymir spat, slapping the rose out of his hand.

The rose fell to the ground with a very faint thud, some roses falling out of their place. They were then whisked away from the breeze, though they only traveled so far before getting caught in a nearby bush. Jean bit his lip with major disapproval, but he brushed it off his shoulder. Ymir simply rolled her eyes and looked away, completely disappointed in herself; Not because she ruined a perfectly good rose and disrespected her comrade, but because she could have given that to Krista. It would have made the blonde so happy. That sparked something in her mind.

"Jean, where did you find that flower?"

He chuckled darkly. "What, you want to destroy them all?"

"I'm not that heartless," Ymir paused before adding, "It's Krista's birthday next week, and I want to give her one,"

"Is that actually Ymir talking?" Jean asked, mimicking a [very] surprised voice.

"You don't have to be a dick about it," she spat. She hesitated for a moment and reluctantly muttered, "... I just want to give her something in return,"

Jean gave a warm smile before patting a hand on her shoulder. "Don't worry about it, I'm just messing around with you. I'll bring you one on her birthday, how's that sound?"

She slapped his hand away and snarled, "Don't touch me,"

"I'll take that as a 'Thanks, Jean! That's so thoughtful of you!'"

With an the irritated cluck of the tongue, she gave him a dangerous glare and stalked off into the hallway, leaving him to walk to the dining hall by himself.

**o0o0o0o**

Armin felt at home with his friends. Sasha and Connie had already made peace, Mikasa was have a small chat with Krista, and Eren had went through the trouble of getting him his food. After frantically muttering his thanks, they all sat together and finished breakfast (though Mikasa was the first to finish). A couple of late soldiers had walked in for breakfast that morning as the clock struck thirty past nine. Armin yawned softly and rest his head on two folded hands, earning a small peck on the top of his head from his lover. While Sasha squealed and Mikasa smiled softly into her scarf, he heard the bench squeak as someone sat next to him. He looked over to greet whoever it was; His eyes slightly widened to see it was Jean. He still felt terrible for leaving Jean like he did the week before.

"So it's Armin," he laughed as he rest one arm on Armin's shoulder while flicking his forehead with the other, "You're finally awake,"

"It's nice to see you too, Jean," Armin smiled, rubbing his forehead where he had been flicked.

The blonde turned back to talk to Eren, only to see that he wore a dangerous look in his eyes. Mikasa had seen this, too, and readied herself to jump in and stop a fight. Sasha, Connie, and Krista didn't notice, though; They were all laughing animatedly while Sasha told a 'funny' story. Jean got caught within the line of Eren's dangerous glare and removed his arm from the blonde's shoulder.

"I'm clean, officer," he stated as he raised his arms.

"Fuck off," Eren snarled.

Armin's confused voice calmed him down a bit. "Eren? Is something wrong?"

The brunette shook his head and reached for his drink, raising it up to his lips ad murmuring, "Nothing at all,"

Jean smirked at this action and leaned towards Armin to strike up a conversation. "Hey, Armin, you're feeling better now, right? I'd recommend taking it easy for now; That fever of yours was terrible,"

"Yes, I feel all right," Armin replied with a smile. "I've never felt so hungry before, though,"

He laughed and said, "Is that so? Did you like the roses I sent you?"

"They're really nice,"

Eren sat up from his seat and muttered, "Armin, let's go,"

"Why?" he asked innocently.

"We're leaving,"

Mikasa watched as they left the dining hall, Eren wearing an irritated look on his face and Armin trying to calm him down with soothing words. She sighed softly and nuzzled into her scarf, turning to Jean and giving him an unimpressed look.

"You really know how to push his buttons," Mikasa stated plainly.

Jean rolled his eyes. "I didn't mean to piss him off by talking to Armin. Is it a crime?"

"No," she replied with a slightly monotonous voice, "It's just that Armin means a lot to him. I don't like seeing him in a foul mood, you know,"

"I don't do it on purpose,"

"I'm aware of that,"

They sat together in silence while the other three continued their vivid conversation (though Krista was the quietest one between the three).

**o0o0o0o**

_(Later that day)_

_(Evening; Thirty past seven)_

Levi yawned deeply as he signed the last bit of paperwork he had on his desk. His hand felt cramped after spending so long at his desk, writing and signing his name multiple times. It was hell. He didn't even know where his lover was at the moment – hopefully enjoying his time off. Levi bit his lip angrily at the thought of him; To think that Erwin would let him sleep in an infirmary room. It was way too embarrassing, now that he thought of it. He dropped his quill on the desk and stretched his back, a faint crack issuing from his aching spine. With a soft grunt, he stretched his arms next, wincing softly as he heard a hesitant knock on his door.

He grumbled his approval and rubbed his tired eyes. His eyelids felt heavy, his entire body worn. As soon as he looked up from the desk, he saw that Eren was standing at the doorway. Eren looked hesitant to come in; It probably had something to do with the time Levi had gotten himself drunk. Intoxication wasn't the road he was fond of taking, especially with the toll it takes when the whole thing is over. Levi rolled his eyes at Eren's expression.

"I won't bite that hard," he sighed. "Come in?"

Eren nodded and snapped the door shut behind him, walking over to Levi's desk and taking a seat in the chair in front of him. "You wanted to see me, Heichou?"

"I had a little discussion with Erwin earlier. I don't care what you say, but you're coming with us to Sina once the weather clears up, which may be tomorrow or the day after that,"

"May I ask why we're going to the interior?" the brunette asked.

Levi rest his head on two folded hands. "Mainly because we're still fighting for custody of your bratty ass, and it's not exactly safe here. If we compare your fate with Erwin or Arlert's, it won't be so pretty. Don't think your Titan powers will keep you safe from everything,"

He blushed lightly in embarrassment. "Well, no, sir... that's not at all what I think..."

"There's also one little thing I forgot to mention,"

Eren stared at him through curious eyes.

"Most of the strategists and higher-ups were thinking up a shitty plan to capture the Female Titan -" he huffed impatiently as that usual angry spark flickered in the brunette's eyes, "- but it'd be logical to discuss this with Erwin, Nanaba, and Mike later on. Maybe Arlert, depending on what Erwin would like,"

"So we're going to wall Sina to 'capture' the Female Titan, sir?" Eren asked hopefully.

"I nearly forgot that 'Titan' was your trigger word," the raven deadpanned, rolling his eyes. "Hold on for a moment. I want you to know one thing, you little shit – if you get yourself killed, or worse, you kill a valuable witness, just know that I'll bury Arlert alive,"

"Sir, you're not serious!"

Levi snickered at Eren's reaction. "You shouldn't take most of these bullshit threats so seriously, brat. You know that I wouldn't be able to do that without getting my ass arrested,"

He nodded slowly and stared at his feet. Levi ignored this and continued, "You won't be the only one coming. Most of the older soldiers and some of your superiors will be coming along with us. We'll need all the help we can get, and those bitches in the interior have never seen a Titan in their lives,"

The raven waited for a bit before continuing, "You won't be the only one in the 104th Trainee Squad that's coming, either. Ackerman, Ymir, Lenz, and Kirstein will be -"

"- You can't be serious!" Eren cut him off with a whine.

"What, you have a problem with Kirstein?" Levi asked curiously.

"He's an asshole, sir,"

"Then I'll make sure you two are assigned duty together," he grinned. "Hell, the only reason why Lenz is tagging along in this mission is because Ymir simply refused to go without her. She's almost as useless as Arlert, but the only difference between them is that your lover is much smarter than the average sixteen or seventeen-year-old,"

Eren whined again before adding, "Sir... isn't Armin going to participate in this mission...?"

"As kind as this may sound, we think he's been through enough," he answered, trying to ignore the puppy eyes the brunette wore. "Don't try to make me feel bad, you cock sucker. It won't work. We'll see if he goes. It's not my decision, it'll mostly be his,"

"... Heichou..."

Levi threateningly slammed both of his hands on the desk and stated in a dangerous tone, "I swear to fuck, if you decide to bitch about it once the day comes, my foot _will _teleport up your ass,"

Eren gulped loudly and squirmed lightly under the intensity of his glare. The raven huffed lightly in amusement and sat back in his seat, yawning softly before kicking Eren out of his office.

* * *

**Note: **I just wanted to let you guys know: I'm currently working on a Riren fanfic, and I'm planning to have it up late April or early May (after I finish Fever). Just in case if you're interested. :)


	27. XXVII: Strength

**Note: **There's a reason why this fanfiction is rated M. I have no excuses for this chapter... **none**.

Edit: I just noticed the many mistakes I made. Oh god I'm embarrassed Q_Q and I rewrote a section or two, hope you don't mind.

* * *

**_XXVII: Strength_**

_(Later on that night)_

_(Evening; Eight o'clock)_

Once Eren had made his way back to his dorm from Levi's office, he saw that Armin wasted no time at all in catching up on his reading. Several books were still piled high on his desk; He probably just got back from the library, no doubt. The blonde laid on his bed, his nose literally stuck in the book he was reading. Armin looked up from his book and greeted Eren with a warm smile, stuffing a small bookmark between the pages he was reading and setting it aside. He sat up correctly and folded his legs, inviting Eren to sit next to him on his bed.

"Did I interrupt?" Eren asked with a small grin as he climbed on Armin's bed and planted a light kiss on his cheek.

"Don't worry about it, I'm not even close to the climax yet,"

Eren seated himself in front of Armin rather than next to him, mainly because he still had the blonde's Christmas present and wanted to see his reaction. He barely remembered that he still had it, and a small pinch of remorse was felt in the pit of his heart for not giving it to Armin earlier. He stuffed his hand into his coat to fish out the book, leaving Armin to watch him curiously.

"Say, Armin -" the brunette took out the old book from his coat and presented it to his lover, "- do you remember this book?"

Armin's eyes narrowed in disbelief, and after a moment's hesitation, he snatched the book out of Eren's hands with a small gasp. He read the title _'Landscapes of the World' _with a mixture of disbelief and surprise in his eyes. He looked up at Eren (he concluded that the book was real because of the brunette's grin) and back at the book, instantly flipping through the pages and scanning its contents.

"I... I can't believe it," he sighed, stopping on a familiar page (fire water, if he remembered correctly), "Eren, how... I though this book got burned with the others!"

"I knew this was your favorite book at the time, so I hid it in a different location in case the Military found it," Eren replied, his grin widening with Armin's squeak of delight.

"I can't believe it...! You... you kept it all these years?!"

He nodded vigorously. "Mhm. I brought it with me five years ago, when we signed up to be soldiers. It was a pain in the ass, hiding it from our superiors,"

"Why did you wait until now to give it to me...?" Armin asked, not taking his eyes off the page he was reading.

"To be completely honest... I forgot about it until now..." the brunette laughed awkwardly, scratching the nape of his neck. He reached out to Armin and cupped his lover's chin, pushing his head up and his eyes away from the page. "But that doesn't matter, does it? What's important now is that it got back to its original owner,"

With that said, he planted a kiss on Armin's lips. It was a rather lazy kiss, but still enjoyable for the both of them. Armin couldn't deny that most of his worries at this point were gone – ever since his reunion with Eren, he felt care free, and possibly 'innocent'. Armin broke away from the kiss and let out another squeak of excitement. He just couldn't help it; His thirst for knowledge of the outside world never has been quenched, but ever since the Military Brigade found the other books about landscapes and oceans in the Jaeger household, they never saw another book on the outside world since. They burned all the books in front of them, with Armin clutching to Eren's hand and sniffling into the sleeve of his coat. Eren huffed softly in amusement as he pulled away from the blonde and watched as he flipped through the pages.

Armin stopped at a page near the end of the book and held it up for Eren to see, saying, "Look, Eren! Do you remember this? It even says right here that the ocean is made mostly out of salt – you see, I told you!"

"You don't know how happy I am to see you like this," the brunette chuckled softly, earning a blush of embarrassment.

"I couldn't be happier,"

As Eren yawned deeply into his hand, the sleeves of Armin's coat were slowly slipping further down his arm and revealing his forearms. The brunette's eyes widened as he scanned his forearms; The bandages were all gone, including the cast that was wrapped around Armin's wrist.

"Armin... what happened to the bandages?"

"What – oh," the blonde set down the book in his lap and hugged himself with an undeniably fake smile on his lips. "You see... I was talking to Hanji earlier... and apparently, I'm able to heal faster than the average man now... you know, with the blood of _two _Titan shifters... I think it has some sort of aftereffect on me..."

"You sound scared," Eren stated plainly.

"... I won't deny that I'm scared. The main reason is because Hanji wants to experiment with me now... but what if I end up becoming a Titan shifter, like you and Annie?"

Eren shook his head and sighed. "What is there to be scared of?"

"... You would still love me, right?"

"What the fuck are you talking about?" the brunette asked, a slight surge of rage coursing through his veins. "Do you seriously think I'd hate you just because you could turn into one of those bastards?"

Armin bit his lip and squeaked, "I'm not like you! I'm not strong like you! If I did turn into a Titan, I'd probably kill someone, even myself! I'd fuck up completely, you know that!"

"Quit bullshitting with me, Armin!"

"Quit trying to lie to me then!"

"Maybe I will!"

They glared at each other for a moment before Armin backed down with a faint trace of tears in his eyes. With a sharp intake of breath, Eren tried to reach towards Armin and apologize, but his hand was weakly slapped away.

The blonde muttered under his breath, "I'm sorry..."

"No, don't apologize to me!"

"_I'm sorry_!"

At this point, Armin was now in tears. He shuddered softly and wiped the tears away from his eyes, slapping Eren's hand for a second time so it wouldn't come in contact with his face. He tried to scoot back a bit on the bed to create some sort of distance between them, which only made the brunette feel worse. Every faint sob he heard come from Armin was another painful stab to his heart.

"I'm... I'm weak, Eren... I'm sorry..."

"I told you to quit bullshitting with me,"

Eren closed the distance between them and forced Armin's hands away from his face. He messily crashed their lips together, a squeak of protest leaving the back of Armin's throat. Eren held on to his lover's wrists and pulled them away from him, pinning them on either side of him. The brunette kissed Armin's lips vividly, stopping any further sobs from escaping his lips. Armin kissed him back with minor hesitation, his eyelids tightly shut with tears lingering on his cheek and jaw. Eren pulled away from the blonde's lips and planted butterfly kisses over his cheeks and jawline, tasting the saltiness of his tears.

"Eren -"

"- You're not weak,"

"- No, I'm -"

"- Say it one more time, I _dare _you,"

With this threat, Armin kept his lips shut, locking his jaw so he wouldn't say anything else. The brunette let out a small 'hmph' of victory and pecked Armin's lips again, leaning away from him and sitting on his folded legs. His fist were clenched over his knees, his knuckles whited with both frustration and remorse. Armin wouldn't have been crying if he didn't let his anger get the best of him; What kind of boyfriend was he if he made his lover cry like that? Armin's fingertips brushed over his slightly puckered lips and over to his cheek, the feeling of Eren's lips on his skin still tingling brightly. The blonde regret breaking down in front of Eren like that... but he just couldn't help it.

"I'm sorry..."

"Don't apologize to me,"

"I promise I won't cry again,"

Eren was taken aback by this statement, but accepted it warmly. "You promise?"

"I promise," Armin concluded, leaning in and kissing the brunette's lips tenderly to seal that promise.

"I really don't want us to leave on a bad start,"

"What do you mean?"

Eren gasped lightly and said, "No one told you that we were going to the interior?"

"Oh, no, no I know that already, I was part of that meeting," the blonde replied. "I just thought you meant something else..."

"I didn't mean anything but that," Eren said as he reached for the book next to them and handed it to Armin. "Here, keep this safe – you're going to take it with us into wall Sina. We'll read it together,"

"I don't know -"

"- I'm not leaving you here," the brunette cut in immediately.

"It's entirely up to me, correct?"

A small pause signaled him to continue.

"Even if I was still dying in my sickbed, I'd choose to go,"

Eren smiled at his lover and leaned towards him. Before he kissed the blonde, he muttered against his lips, "You're very strong,"

Their lips met and locked like puzzle pieces, a small outtake of breath leaving from Eren's nostrils with relief. The blonde wrapped his arms around Eren's neck to pull him closer, tightening their kiss further. Eren moved his lips in a slow pace against Armin's, the kiss being both tender and passionate. The brunette sucked on Armin's bottom lip gently, grinning softly into the kiss once he felt Armin's hands slither away from his neck and to his chest. Armin pushed lightly, signaling him to lay back on the bed. As much as this surprised Eren, he obeyed his wish and laid back on the bed, breaking away from the kiss to smirk at his lover. The book that had been left forgotten next to them was carelessly pushed off the side of the bed, but neither of them cared at the moment.

Armin blushed softly in embarrassment as he straddled his lover's lap, resting his forearms above Eren's head and leaning in for another kiss. Eren playfully nipped at the blonde's lower lip, his hands snaking around his waist. There was a sudden growth of heat on Armin's end as his blush intensified. Eren lightly caressed Armin's hips as their lips moved vividly, dragging his tongue along Armin's lip to ask for entrance. The blonde immediately complied, moaning softly when he felt Eren's tongue slip into his mouth. Their tongues fought for dominance, dancing together while their lips sucked passionately. Small sucking noises issued from the two, and over time, their oxygen supply began to wear thin. They broke away from the kiss and panted heavily, a thin line of saliva connecting from their mouths.

Eren moved his mouth away from Armin's and to the side of his neck, nibbling gently on the flesh. His lover tilted his head to grant him more access, another faint moan leaving his lips once Eren started to kiss his neck. The brunette's hands started to wander, lightly caressing the small of his back and moving further down towards his rear. As he gripped Armin's ass and playfully nipped at his skin, Armin let out a surprised gasp and held on to his lover's head.

"Did I scare you?" the brunette teased with a mutter against his skin, licking the length of his neck right afterward.

"Sh- Shut up..."

Armin weaved his fingers into Eren's hair instead, his face smoldering with blood as Eren continued to knead his rear through the fabric of his pants. Eren nibbled up to his jawline and kissed his chin before moving to his lips once more. Their tongues reunited, lapping and circling each other, small sucking noises issuing from the two as they passionately sucked on each others lips. After a couple of hesitant moments, Eren brought his knee up to Armin's crotch and ground lightly, earning a groan of pleasure from the friction. His lover was hard, just as he was, himself. He didn't gain any resistance, so he continued to grind his knee against the blonde's clothed erection, sucking on his tongue in time with his movements. Armin found it very difficult to resist the temptation to rut against this lover's knee, and instead, he broke away from the kiss and panted to catch his breath.

Eren, too, was breathing heavily, being left breathless after such a passionate kiss. He scanned Armin's face as he ground his knee against him with a bit more strength, watching for a reaction. The blonde's eyelids fluttered shut as he moaned, giving in to the temptation and rolling his hips to meet Eren's movement. His lover grinned and pecked his lips before running his hands up his shirt. Armin gasped when he felt the brunette's thumbs swipe over his nipples, circling and lightly caressing them. Eren gave a rather rough pinch to one of his nipples, which earned him a rather high-pitched moan.

"Eren, quit teasing me...!" the blonde panted.

"But the look you have on your face right now, it's priceless,"

Armin pouted and slapped his hands away from his chest. "You're mean,"

He sat up and pushed Eren's knee back down to the bed. He pecked lightly at Eren's lips and traveled downwards, leaving a hot trail of kisses down his chest towards his lower abdomen. The brunette licked his lips at the sight, watching as Armin nibbled on his pant line, nudging between his legs and spreading them apart. As much as this aroused him, he couldn't deny that some part of him felt as if he was forcing Armin to do this (in one way or another). Eren immediately gripped his lover's hands (they were fumbling with his zipper) and peered into his eyes.

"You don't have to, it's fine," he continued, "Don't push yourself to do anything you don't want to do,"

"Last time I checked, you didn't ask me to do _anything_," Armin sassed.

Eren grinned at his reply and propped himself up on his elbows, watching as Armin unbuckled his jeans and pulled them down to his knees. After his pants were completely off, Eren blushed in embarrassment and tried to close his legs, but the blonde gripped his thighs and pushed them apart again.

"Let me do this, just this once," Armin muttered, looking up at Eren with clouded eyes.

"... Fine,"

As soon as he gained Eren's approval, he [hesitantly] lowered his head to his lover's crotch and licked his arousal through the fabric of his boxers. Eren's hand weaved into the blonde's hair and played with the soft locks, lightly tugging as he continued to lick. Armin panted against Eren's crotch, sucking on his arousal through the fabric, moaning as he felt Eren pull on his hair. The brunette watched him through clouded eyes; He didn't think Armin would ever bring himself to do this. His lover reached up and pulled down Eren's boxers to reveal his fully hardened member, blushing furiously at the sight.

"I'm inexperienced, so if this is terrible..."

Eren shook his head as his boxers were pulled off him and carelessly thrown to the side. "I highly doubt that it would be terrible,"

Armin smiled softly at those words and brought his lips up to the head of his cock. His tongue darted out between kiss-bruised lips, licking the slit and getting the bitter taste of pre-come on his tongue. He wasn't too fond of the taste, but continued to lick as if it were a sweet. Over time, the mixture of Armin's saliva and Eren's pre-come started to dribble down his cock. The brunette groaned softly and pulled on Armin's hair, clearly protesting against his teasing. Armin grinned and took the head of his cock into his mouth, slowly bobbing his head and bringing more into his mouth. He loosened his jaw further to grant easier access, tears building up in the corners of his eyes from the lack of oxygen and from the throbbing in his jaw.

"- Armin,"

He looked up and saw Eren's face; The brunette's eyes were half-lidded, his face completely flushed with arousal. Armin moaned in response and started to lightly bob his head, his hands gently caressing his lover's thighs and lower abdomen. His tongue slithered along the underside of Eren's cock, eliciting a moan of pleasure from above him. The blonde vigorously sucked in time with his movements, looking up every now and then to admire the erotic look Eren had on his face. Eren caught his eyes as he panted heavily, his hips betraying him in an involuntary buck. He felt the head of his cock hit the back of Armin's throat, which made him moan in pleasure.

As much as Eren was enjoying this, Armin was finding it hard to breathe freely through his nose, tears being the only thing that denied him perfect vision. He nearly gagged when Eren's manhood hit the back of his throat, passing it on as a loud moan. Vibrations were sent down the brunette's member, bringing him a sweet wave of pleasure. Just as Armin started to taste more of Eren's pre-come in his mouth, his lover pushed his head away.

"Wait,"

The blonde released his cock with a soft _pop_, a line of saliva connecting from the tip to his mouth. Saliva covered his kiss-bruised lips, along with a trace of his seed. Eren licked his lips at this sight and gently grabbed Armin's shoulders, lifting him away from his crotch and onto his back. They switched positions; Eren was now straddling Armin's lap, panting lightly with arousal.

"... Armin, if I continue..."

"Do it,"

"I under- wait, what?"

Armin bit his lip and started to unbutton his shirt. "I... I want you... inside of me..."

"This would be your first time... are you sure?" Eren asked, holding onto the blonde's hand and squeezing tightly.

"Positive,"

"It's your virginity, you should save it for someone special,"

He narrowed his eyes dangerously, which took Eren aback. "I love you. I love you with all my heart. Don't you think you're that special someone?"

"... Armin,"

Eren carelessly crashed their lips together, moving his lips vigorously against Armin's. His hands slithered down Armin's semi-clothed chest and down to his lower abdomen, breaking away from the kiss once he reached his pant line. He removed himself from his lap and pulled the blonde's pants down with ease (his nightwear was simple to remove), biting his lip at the sight of his arousal pressing against the fabric of his boxers. Surely the friction from being constricted by the fabric was uncomfortable? Armin kicked his nightwear off (and removed his boxers, himself), and presented himself to Eren, spreading his legs with an embarrassed blush on his face.

The brunette's eyes sparked with arousal with Armin's complete willingness to receive. He turned and scanned the room.

"We don't have any lotion, do we?" he asked.

Armin shook his head and took Eren's hand in his, bringing it up to his mouth to lick his index and middle finger. The brunette gasped lightly at the sudden wetness around his fingers; He watched through surprised eyes as Armin took his two long digits into his mouth and sucked lightly, rolling his tongue over his fingers. He covered them with a generous amount of saliva, admiring Eren's reaction as he pulled them out of his mouth and gave one final lick between his fingers.

"Will this work?" the blonde asked with a cheeky grin on his face.

He smirk spread across his lips. "... I didn't know you had it in you,"

Eren brought his fingers down to his lover's entrance and prodded lightly, the sudden wetness around his twitching heat making him gasp. He leaned over Armin and planted small kisses over his cheek and nose as he pushed one finger into his tight heat. The sudden intrusion earned the brunette a low groan; He felt more pain from such a foreign feeling rather than pleasure. Eren sensed this and bit gingerly into his earlobe.

"Relax a bit, all right?"

"All right..."

After a moment or two, he pulled out his finger and added the second one, a small whine leaving Armin's lips. He was unbelievably tight around Eren's fingers; Despite the pain, he gave Eren a pleading look, who immediately complied. The brunette slowly moved his fingers inside of Armin, lightly scissoring him and loosening his tight heat. Armin brought a hand up to his mouth to muffle his moans, and although he still felt more pain that he did pleasure, it started to feel better over time. Eren started to move his fingers a bit more roughly inside of him, the blonde's muffled moans making his own member twitch. Before he knew it, he felt his fingertips push against something both smooth and round. He heard Armin moan excitedly above him.

"Right there, Eren...! Fuck..."

He glued the palm of his hand to his mouth to muffle his moans as Eren thrust his fingers more roughly, brushing of his prostate with nearly every thrust. The brunette's free hand caressed his inner thigh, lowering his head to plant light kisses over Armin's abdomen. Armin watched with clouded eyes, biting his lip at the erotic sight Eren displayed before him, whimpering from the pleasure he felt. As Eren added a third finger, the blonde bucked his hips and wantonly rocked back against his fingers. He focused on giving quick prods and rotations to his prostate while he kissed everything in the area - everything but his lover's twitching arousal. Armin reached towards his cock to stroke, but his hand was aggressively slapped away. He whined softly in protest, bucking his hips once more. Eren grinned at this sight, leaning back and away from his abdomen.

"How do you feel?" the brunette asked, teasingly trying to spread his three fingers.

"D- Don't ask me that...!" Armin panted, moaning into his hand.

"Are you afraid that someone would hear us?"

"Most of the soldiers are getting ready for bed and... It's embarrassing..." he replied weakly.

"Is that so?"

Eren removed his fingers from inside of his lover, earning a small whine of disapproval from the loss. The brunette removed his shirt and threw it off to the side, the sight of his built abdomen bringing a slight tinge of shame within Armin; He wasn't as well built as Eren. Eren gripped his lover's hips and pressed his cock against his puckered entrance, looking up to Armin for permission to continue. Armin nodded slowly, and with that, Eren gave a shallow thrust, the head of his cock pushing past the first ring of muscle. The tightness of Armin's heat made him groan, while Armin was writhing lightly beneath him. As he continued to push his way into Armin, he leaned over his lover and unbuttoned the rest of the buttons on his pajama shirt. He licked Armin's frail chest, hearing a muffled moan from above him.

Once he was fully seated inside of the blonde, he asked, "Are you all right?"

"It hurts..." Armin panted.

"We can stop now, if you want,"

"No... No, I don't want you to stop,"

With that said, Eren leaned down and licked his erect nipple, lightly sucking on it to get Armin's mind off the pain. They stayed motionless for a couple of moments while he continued to suck, Armin's breath starting to even out from pain to somewhat mild pleasure. The blonde bucked his hips to signal him to continue. He withdrew himself, gently thrusting himself back in with the slow roll of his hips. He continued to repeat this slow process to give Armin some time to adjust, leaning over him and nibbling gingerly on his nipple. Armin hooked his legs around Eren's waist, removing his hand from his mouth to wrap both of his arms around his neck. Eren propped his hands on either side of the blonde to keep himself steady, his lips immediately coming into contact with Armin's. They kissed passionately while Eren continued to thrust his hips, swallowing any mewl that threatened to leave Armin's mouth.

Over the next couple of thrusts, the pressure around his cock lessened and his ability to thrust inside of him became easier. He started to move a bit faster, his thrusts becoming rougher, their kiss getting messier by the second. Their tongues intertwined, the occasional groan leaving the back of Eren's throat. With a rather hard thrust, he hit Armin's prostate, sending a sweet numbness through the blonde's hips. Armin broke away from the kiss and let out an excited moan, only to be hushed by Eren's lips again. He readjusted himself to hit that spot every time afterward. Armin started to buck his hips in time with Eren's thrusts, the sound of the bed squeaking with each movement being the only thing heard (apart from the heavy breathing and very faint sound of skin meeting skin).

Armin broke away from the kiss and said, "Eren, slow down, someone will hear the bed..."

"Hmm... that's true,"

Eren abruptly pulled out, earning a small whine. Instead, he stepped off the narrow bed and picked his lover up in his arms (who immediately squeaked in protest). He walked to the dresser across from them and set Armin back down on his feet, bending him over the dresser and pulling off his unbuttoned pajama shirt, throwing it aside without a damn in the world where it went. Armin's eyes widened as he saw their reflection in the dusty mirror.

"W- What are you doing?!"

"You won't have to worry about the squeak of the bed here, and plus, I want you to watch your reflection while I make love to you,"

"That's embarrassing...!" Armin complained.

"Please?"

Armin bit his lip and stared at his reflection in the mirror; He was completely flushed, tears lingering in his eyes and his lips kiss-bruised. It was embarrassing. Before he could complain any further, Eren thrust himself back into Armin, who immediately covered his mouth with his hand. As he moaned into his palm, he studied himself in the mirror and felt his heart skip a bit with fear; No, he wasn't afraid of Eren in any way possible, he was afraid of the face and noises he was making. Eren bent over Armin and wrapped his arms around his frail body, depending mostly on him to keep them up. Armin gripped onto the edges of the dresser with both hands, an excited moan leaving his lips.

As soon as Eren heard this, he moved his hand up to the blonde's mouth and prodded his lips with two fingers. Armin obeyed, his tongue lapping the two digits that entered his mouth. His moans were once again muffled, this time with Eren's fingers, leaving him to quietly whimper. Eren thrust his hips faster, licking his lover's shoulder blade, his other hand finding its way to his lower abdomen and caressing softly. He pushed in against Armin's abdomen, eliciting a grunt of pleasure. Armin sucked on his fingers desperately, silently begging for more. The brunette bit into his shoulder and groaned as he thrust much harder, his cock hitting his lover's prostate with each thrust. The blonde watched as this all happened – the reactions he had, the faces he made when he moaned.

He released Eren's fingers and mewled breathlessly, "Eren, I love you!"

Eren grunted in response and turned Armin's head to look over his shoulder. He greeted Armin with his lips, kissing him with all the passion he could muster up in his tired frame, his thighs beginning to feel sore after keeping up such a fast and heavy pace with his thrusts. As they continued their sloppy kiss, Armin felt his lower abdomen start to burn almost painfully, signaling that he was close to the edge. Eren sensed this, too, and wrapped the hand he had used to muffle his moans around his lover's cock, pumping vigorously in time with his thrusts. A sweetness ran through Armin's hips as he came closer to climaxing, breaking away from the kiss to pant heavily and watch his reaction in the mirror as requested to. Eren nipped at the shell of his ear, their eyes meeting through their reflection.

As Armin reached his limit, he gave Eren a pleading look, who instantly understood and brought his hand up to muffle his moans. Just as Armin's seed spilled from his manhood, Eren constricted his hand around his cock tightly. The pain and pleasure from the action muddled together, and thank god he had something to muffle his moans with. A tear or two ran down his cheek while he enjoyed the high of his orgasm and the pleasure from the penetration. Eren licked the tears off his cheek and removed his hand from his cock, now embracing Armin tightly from behind. He panted heavily into Armin's shoulder, his thrusts now very erratic, and with the final hard jab of the prostate, he came inside of his lover's tight heat. Armin whined in both pain and pleasure as he bit into his shoulder again, muffling his own low moan and leaving a small bruise.

They were both breathing heavily, both staring into their reflection with tired and flushed expressions. After spending a minute or two to calm down from their high, Eren pulled out of Armin, the blonde grunting softly as he did so. He also removed his fingers from Armin's mouth. As soon as he did this, Armin's knees shook dangerously before giving out. Eren was already ahead of him, though; He wrapped his arms around the blonde's frail body and carried him to his bed.

"You should get some rest," the brunette smiled softly. He turned back to see that Armin's come was splattered over one of the drawers; Blushing lightly, he added, "I need to clean up..."

"Forget about that for now. Sleep with me," Armin pouted as he was put down on his bed.

"Think there's room?"

"We'll manage,"

After readjusting and such, they lay in bed together, with Armin's head resting comfortably against Eren's firm chest. The brunette wrapped his arms tightly around Armin, nuzzling softly into his hair.

"You're strong, Armin,"

"... Thank you,"

That night, Armin fell asleep to the steady tempo of Eren's heartbeat. The sound of the blonde's peaceful breathing against his chest brought a smile to his lips. Before he nodded off, one thing was for certain in his mind.

Nothing can dissever the love they have for each other.


	28. XXVIII: Careless

**Note: **hatsonthefloor, thanks for the reviews. You really make my day (is that weird for me to say? meh).

This chapter was the result of me listening to the Dramatical Murder OST 'Only Finally There Is The Free End'/'At Last' and trying to progress with the plot. It's cheerful and not as formal as I intended it to be. Oh well, right? We all need gentle smiles, embarrassed blushes, and flustered superiors in our lives. And necklaces... _necklaces_. *Foreshadow* *Foreshadow* -.- ugh. It also took me three tries to edit this chapter. I hate for crashing on me right when I'm about to click the 'save' button. Q_Q

And you all know full well who that dead soldier is. Reiner's being careless, you know.

* * *

**_XXVIII: Careless_**

_(Next day)_

_(Morning; Fifteen past ten,)_

Eren woke up to the sound of rustling sheets. He groaned lightly as he resurfaced from his slumber, shifting around a bit in his bed before lazily rubbing his eyes. There was a faint burning sensation of fatigue around his thighs; Probably from the night before, no doubt. After taking in a slow breath of air from the depths of his pillow, he immediately remembered that he had fallen asleep with Armin in his arms before. Where was he? He unburied his face from the pillow and propped himself up on his elbows, noticing that an extra blanket had been thrown over him. He heard a faint giggle come from nearby, and he instinctively jerked his head towards that sound.

"Something wrong, Eren?"

A smile crept on his lips as his eyes rest on Armin, who's hair was extremely ruffled and wore a carelessly draped coat over his shoulders. Under that was his military uniform, minus the straps of the Maneuver Gear . The blonde hugged an old book tightly to his chest as he cocked his head to the side and smiled cheekily; Armin was just too damn cute sometimes. Eren huffed softly in amusement at this sight and sat up correctly on the bed.

"You were asleep for a long time, you know. We missed breakfast," Armin stated cheerfully.

He raised an eyebrow at this. "Why are you so cheerful if you missed breakfast?"

"You know full well,"

He couldn't help but laugh. The blankets that covered him slid down to his lower stomach, exposing his firm chest and abdomen. He came to the realization that he was still naked, and that fact brought an embarrassed blush to his face. Armin saw this and walked to the dresser to pull out new clothing for his lover. Eren remembered the mess they made the night before and opened his mouth to question it, but he was immediately hushed.

"Before you ask, yes, I cleaned up for you," Armin called over his shoulder as he looked around for a shirt. "and... by the way..." he looked back at Eren with a highly flustered blush on his face, "... it kind of hurts to sit now..."

"I'll take care of that," the brunette grinned cheekily. "Did you know that your moans are really cute?"

Armin thrust a set of clothes towards his direction and kicked the drawer shut with a small huff. "You jerk!"

As Eren slipped his shirt on and made for his underwear, he asked, "Why didn't you wake me up earlier? Mind you, I'm pretty damn hungry,"

"To be completely honest, it took my entire heart and soul trying to get up this morning. You have such a peaceful look on your face when you sleep," the blonde said. He leaned back on the drawer and continued, "and if you're still up to asking for food so late in the morning, might as well head up to Commander Erwin's office with me as well. We're due to the meeting about the mission in the interior in about... twenty, thirty minutes, maybe? Somewhere around there, I don't know,"

"Why are you so calm about it?"

"I just am,"

Once Eren had pulled on all of his clothes (unsurprisingly enough, it was his uniform), he left the bed and stretched his back, the small cracking of his spine bringing a grunt of relief from the back of his throat. Now that he payed more attention to it, Armin looked pretty tired, as well. As if it were on cue, Armin yawned softly into the cover of his book (which Eren recognized as the landscape book). The brunette walked over to his lover and reached a hand into his soft hair, lightly stringing his fingers through it and patting it down on his head. It looked like a mess; Not that it bothered him.

"My hair's fine -"

"- That means I can't try to fix it anyways?"

He giggled softly and slapped Eren's hand away, only to have his own hand caught between the others fingers. Eren brought the blonde's hand up to his mouth and kissed lightly, a grin forming on his face when he saw the faint blush on his lover's cheeks. He yawned as he let go of Armin's hand, searching through the room for wherever the hell his boots were. While he found and pulled on his boots, he saw that Armin had already went back to reading the book he received yesterday. This made Eren's heart flutter lightly.

With a small tap to his lover's shoulder, he nodded his head towards the door and asked, "We're supposed to discuss the mission with Commander Erwin, right?"

Armin nodded vigorously, and with that, they were off.

**o0o0o0o**

Was it corny to state the quote "love is in the air"? Armin didn't know, nor did he really care, though the split-second sight was both amusing and cheery (well, at least it was cheerful in his eyes). Whether Life decided to fool them or not, they didn't care; They had walked in on Erwin and Levi kissing on his desk, arms embracing tightly and lips moving passionately. The embarrassment of them walking in on their little session was enough to force a highly flustered blush onto Levi's cheeks and made him bark at them to leave. Erwin, however, payed no mind to it and invited them in anyways, which brought him a light whine of disappointment from his lover. Once they were seated in front of Erwin's desk (Levi had stalked off somewhere in the office and managed to open the window and perch himself on the windowsill), Erwin pulled out a folder filled with documents from his desk.

As Eren gave a tired glare at the folder, his superior chuckled lightly and said, "Don't worry, Eren, I won't bore you to death with these,"

"Praise the Lord," the brunette sighed, earning a small laugh from both blondes.

"You two being active and cheerful lately -" (_Eren and Armin exchanged looks before blushing furiously and shifting their eyes away from each other_), "- means that you're coming to Sina, correct?"

They nodded and he continued; "Either way, we would have waited for Armin since he was the one that planned out and explained most of the things mentioned in the meeting -" (_Armin chuckled softly and scratched the nape of his neck with a pleased smile on his lips,_) "- We wouldn't be able to do most of this without him. I'll explain certain things in here -" he took out a couple of papers from the folder, "- but I'm just going to pull out sweet bits of information that we need to complete it. Armin, you may add to it if you'd like,"

With that done, he explained the plan of capturing the Female Titan, keeping things short and sweet as promised.

**o0o0o0o**

_(Twenty minutes later)_

"... you understand, correct?"

Eren and Armin instantly replied in unison, "Yes, sir!"

"Very well," Erwin nodded in approval and carelessly stuffed the documents into one of the drawers in his desk. "We're going to leave tomorrow around four or five -" (_They heard Levi growl dangerously, which they probably thought was in disapproval of the early time they were set to_), "- and it'd be well advised not to show up later than expected,"

He finished with a small jerk of the head towards Levi's direction, who was sitting on the windowsill and leaning dangerously out the window towards the darkened clouds above them. Armin couldn't stop the giggle that left the back of his throat that made Erwin give an amused smile. They heard Levi growl before leaning back into the room and glaring at them through cold eyes, which instantly took them aback.

"Erwin, do you have a rope that I can just fucking hang someone with? Like, a thick one,"

"What makes you say that?" their superior laughed, but he was immediately hushed with the roll of his lover's eyes.

"Get over here and tell me this is perfectly fine,"

They exchanged suspicious looks, which Levi ignored and swung his legs back over the windowsill to step back into the room. He strode off towards the door to Erwin's office and immediately called for the nearest soldiers. This made Erwin take the raven's words a little more seriously and he hastened over to the window, peering out to see what Levi was talking about. It took him a while of concentration to see what he was talking about. He growled dangerously and turned to Eren and Armin with a concerned look on his face.

"I want you two to call for Hanji in her lab as soon as possible and report back to either Levi or me near the front of the castle..."

He hesitated for a moment and continued, "... It looks like the ambushes haven't stopped here,"

**o0o0o0o**

By the time they had fulfilled Erwin's request and reported to the front of the Survey Corps base, there were already multiple higher-up soldiers and a doctor tending to a body. Armin felt his heart clench tightly in fear as they neared the body; The person was wearing a soldier's uniform, but the badge wasn't anywhere to be seen on his jacket. His face was covered from view from the doctor looking over him. What made that surge of fear worse was the fact that the person's chest wasn't moving in the slightest. Eren sensed this and wrapped an arm around his lover's shoulders, pulling him closely to the side of his body. The warmth succeeded in comforting Armin.

Though the real reason why Armin was scared was because this ambush... was actually a murder. Erwin was bent over the body next to the doctor, who's hands were quickly setting to work. Checking for a pulse rate, feeling the crooks of vital areas such as the neck and back, eyes narrowed and searching.

"Sir... he's not breathing,"

"- What do you mean?"

"His neck is broken... an instant death, judging by the look on his face,"

"- How long had the body been there?"

"I'm not a detective, Commander, but if I had to judge, I'd say that it's about a week or two old..."

Erwin stood up from the soldier's side, along with the doctor, revealing the person's face. No one recognized the soldier at all, not even Erwin (who naturally knew pretty much everyone in the Survey Corps). The soldier wore his hair in a bowl cut and his dress shirt buttoned up to his neck, giving him a rather formal look compared to the everyday solider in the Survey Corps. Even if his badge was missing from his pocket, surely they were able to check the back for the crest of his Branch? Whether this man was actually a soldier that belonged in their Branch or not, it didn't matter; The real question now was how he was murdered. Or better - _who? _

"How the hell does this go unnoticed for such along period of time?" the Commander sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose with pure frustration.

Levi tugged lightly on his sleeve (this brought a smile to Eren's face since he looked remarkably like a small child) and said, "No one knew this soldier was here, not even me. You would like to thank the wolves around here that managed to find the dead body. You wouldn't know how surprised I was to see a hungry pair of wolves tugging on a soldier's body,"

"How the hell -"

"- I don't know,"

"Why didn't anyone -"

"-_ I don't know_, Erwin,"

Armin could tell that everyone was stressed and shaken by this; Even _Levi _was finding it hard to contain his anger. First his lover being ambushed, then one of his best strategists was nearly killed, and now a solider that no one recognized was murdered? _On their land?_ Incredible. His eyes observed the scene; Hanji was seen talking to her squad, Nanaba and Mike were bickering animatedly, numerous soldiers scanning the area. Pure chaos. Why couldn't this have been another ambush and not the first murder?

"Do you have any idea of who murdered this man?" the doctor asked while two (rather flustered) soldiers carried the dead body off into the castle to be examined further.

Levi shook his head, but he instantly stopped once he felt Erwin's large hand on his shoulder. His superior gave the raven a guilty look before saying, "I have a vague idea of who it could be, but right now isn't the time to talk about it,"

Levi bit his lip and ignored being caught by Erwin's eyes. Instead, he snapped, "It's either now or never, Erwin,"

"Patience is a virtue,"

He growled in disapproval and brushed his lover's hand off his shoulder. He stalked off to Nanaba and Mike (who were still bickering over the situation), leaving Erwin to sigh in disappointment. Armin felt Eren's hand squeeze his arm lightly before being pulled off to the side and towards the castle.

Before Armin could protest, his lover muttered, "It's best we leave now. This isn't the greatest place to be. It's better if we prepare for tomorrow,"

Armin opened his mouth to whine, but instead, he caught his tongue and kept his mouth shut. It's true; This wasn't the best place to be at the moment. They fled into the dark castle, ignoring the curious eyes of soldiers as they did so. Eren decided that now was the time to push all of his protests into the back of his throat and lead the way to the library, which pleased the blonde greatly.

**o0o0o0o**

_(Later on that day,)_

_(Afternoon; Thirty past one.)_

Armin giggled lightly as he felt Eren's lips scan his face with butterfly kisses. Their legs tangled in a knot, arms embracing each other lovingly, a thick blanket thrown carelessly over them. Despite the limited amount of space they had in a small bed (the beds used by the Survey Corps weren't meant for two people), they still managed to lay comfortably together. Cuddling, nuzzling, sweet things being whispered, the occasional faint huff of laughter heard from either one of them. They were spending their time together perfectly; There probably won't be another chance to enjoy each others company anytime soon. Their coats were carelessly thrown to the side as soon as they got back to their dorm. It would have been a sin to push the murder towards the back of their head if it wasn't because of such a beautiful purpose.

Eren didn't want Armin to worry himself over anything before their next mission. Even if he, himself, found it highly unbelievable that Annie would actually aim to murder someone. Not that it was Annie for certain, but he assumed that it was her right off the bat. Yet now wasn't the time to be worrying about that. Eren made sure to nudge the situation out of his lover's mind for the time being; He continued to press light kisses against any part of his skin he could reach and mildly tease him with a grin on his lips. Armin naturally knew what Eren's intentions were, and he chose to go along with it, as well.

They knew each other more than they knew themselves. Their relationship was going well, considering the way they lived and the crimes that have been committed. They still love each other, even if they were forced apart by disaster after disaster. It was just so _perfect_.

As Armin's lips met Eren's, he blushed lightly and absentmindedly tugged at his hair. The sensation of having his hair pulled made the brunette let out a sharp breath through his nose. Eren broke away from the kiss and playfully nipped at his lips before nuzzling into his bangs.

"Armin?"

"- Hmm?"

"Mind reading to me?"

"- Why is that?"

"You said you would,"

"- Any book?"

"Any book,"

Armin chuckled lightly before unwrapping his arms from Eren's body and shifted to where he was laying comfortably on his stomach. He propped himself on his elbows to reach over to the counter. He was reaching for the old leather book which Eren instantly recognized as the landscape book, and he couldn't deny that some part of him was actually excited to hear about the outside world. As the blonde gripped the book, Eren wrapped an arm around his waist and planted quick kisses to his shoulder. He instantly saw that the bruises from last night were gone; If Armin knew...

His thoughts were interrupted by Armin's soft voice. "I really want to read about the oceans. I found some theories in here about the ocean and its contents this morning, and I thought they were interesting..."

"Tell me more about the mountains of ice after you share your theories, then," the brunette muttered between kisses.

Eren pulled his lover closer to him and intertwined his leg with the others. The blonde was still on his stomach and propped up on his elbows, quickly flipping from page to page to find the chapter on oceans and rivers. As he did this, Eren continued to press gentle kisses against his shoulder blade, trailing down to the crook of his neck and nipping lightly at his jawline. Armin whined playfully at the last nip and pushed the book towards the brunette. The book was flipped to a page that wore the title '_Oceans, Rivers, and Steams_', written beautifully in cursive. Armin wore the faintest smile on his lips at the sight of the chapter title that only widened as his eyes met Eren's.

They stared into each others eyes for a moment before Armin gasped lightly; He barely remembered about the gift he got Eren for Christmas. He didn't have the chance to give him the present before, and now was the perfect time to do it. Armin broke away from the gaze and slipped out from under the covers (which made the brunette whine in disappointment) and walked towards the dresser. He rummage through one of his drawers for his present (Eren watched with a confused look in his eyes) and felt his heart flutter when his fingertips pushed against a small box. He was excited to see Eren's reaction – would he like it at all?

As he pulled out the box from his drawer, he heard Eren groan, "Don't tell me you spent money on me for Christmas,"

"Then I won't tell you," he replied cheerfully, the eagerness of his gait pushing Eren to roll his eyes.

"You're really cheeky, you know that?"

"Why, thank you,"

The blonde represented the box to Eren, who reluctant took it in his hand and sat up correctly on the bed. The small box was as white as snow, being held shut by a loosely braided string of Red and Green. Armin's recognizable neat handwriting was visible under the beautifully tied bow, reading, "Merry Christmas, Eren." He fumbled a bit with the string tied around it (this made Armin grin with amusement while he sat down next to him) and finally managed to open the present. As he lifted the lid of the box, his eyes widened.

"You've... you've got to be shitting me..."

Inside was a small metal that was carved into the shape of the Wings of Freedom. One wing crossing the other, finely painted with white, gray, and blue. The crest and feathers were outlined nicely with golden paint; The golden outline was the only thing that separated the two wings. Very small dents were carved into the whites and blues of the wings, along with the background (the crest behind it) that was painted delicately in dark gray and black along the golden outlines. Armin watched with anxious eyes as Eren picked up the Wings, only to see that it was attached to a thin (yet sturdy) silver chain. The brunette was left completely speechless.

"Armin... you... you bastard..."

"W- What? You don't like it...?" Armin asked with a disappointed tone.

"I... I love it!" Eren replied with a small sigh. He immediately caught himself and snapped, "Jesus Christ, how much did you spend on this?!"

"Well, you _did _say that I shouldn't tell you," the blonde replied, emphasizing his sentence with a rather cheeky voice.

Eren growled playfully and pounced on his lover, pinning him down to the bed. This took Armin by full surprise; He squeaked lightly when he felt Eren kiss him roughly on the lips. The box was immediately thrown to the floor, the beautiful necklace still clutched tightly in the brunette's hand (Armin could feel the sharp edges of the wings against his wrist). It took him a moment to process what was happening before he kissed Eren back, but he wasn't as rough as his lover was. Eren pulled away from the kiss and nipped aggressively at his lips, earning another whine.

"That's what you get," the brunette huffed, unpinning Armin's hands and granting him freedom.

He sat back on the bed and nodded in victory as Armin massaged his lips with a small pout.

"That hurt... kiss it and make it better?" the blonde asked with an over dramatic sigh.

Eren chuckled lightly at this and leaned in to kiss his lover, but this time he was gentle. He caressed the blonde's lips with his, sucking gingerly before breaking away from the kiss and muttering, "All better?"

Armin nodded vigorously with a pleased grin on his face. He reached for the necklace in Eren's hand and held it in his own, narrowing his eyes lightly before taking the chain in his hands and throwing it over Eren's head. The chain was long enough for one to slip on with ease, the Wings of Freedom resting comfortably against the center of his chest. Eren took the Wings in his hand and stared at the complexity of the way it had been carved and painted.

He glanced up to his lover and asked, "Armin, seriously... did you make this or...?"

"No, I couldn't make something like that," the blonde laughed. "You see, my Grandfather knew a man in Karanese that was really talented in making necklaces and such. I heard about him from a merchant in the city when I attended a meeting with Commander Erwin and I thought I'd look for him before we left. I was planning on painting it, myself, but he recognized me and offered to carve and paint whatever I'd like for free..."

"You're kidding!" Eren groaned in envy.

"I feel terrible, I mean, just look at it. No wonder it took such a long time... I told him it was for you, and I guess he put some extra work into it. At no cost at all, too," Armin replied weakly. He laid back and rested his head against the pillows, yawned deeply before continuing, "Well, I'm glad you like it. You don't have to wear it if you don't want to,"

"What do you mean? Of course I'll wear it!"

Armin blushed in embarrassment as he watched the brunette curiously turn the Wings over to look at the back. He gasped as he saw the back; No, nothing was painted besides his name, which was written beautifully in golden cursive letters with very defined loops. A smile ripped across his lips as he tore his eyes away from the necklace to look back at Armin, who was already dozing off. He tucked the necklace into his shirt and kissed Armin's forehead before throwing the blanket back over themselves. Armin nuzzled comfortably against his chest, the sound of his lover's heartbeat ringing soothingly in his ears. The brunette wrapped his arms around him once more, the sudden warmth making both of them start to feel drowsy despite it still being early in the day.

Their eyelids grew heavy, and they fell asleep together without any other concern in their minds.


	29. XXIX: Repudiation

**Note: **I'm letting my different opinions and shippings effect the content that's written in this fanfiction. Oh damn, how I hate life. Sucks. For some reason, I'm finding a lot of my inspiration from Dramatical Murder OST's lately. Like 'Sandy Weeds' and 'Tears'. Listen to them, they're beautiful. Besides that witchery, I'm starting to plan out my chapters again... maybe that's a good thing? I swear to god my hand refused to move the pencil once I got to chapter 31. -.- Oh well, right? I'm craving more Jearmin in this fanfiction, so that'll happen, and maybe another fluffy Eremin scene or two. It's actually really fun to write now that I think of it. Let me let you guys in on a little secret... I didn't plan to have rape in this fanfiction until now (but I'm stil debating on it). Bear with me ;-; Also, I never really noticed how fond was in stating my times as twenty, thirty, or forty five past whatever hour. Interesting.

Remember Ilunabarra? She loves you guys and wanted to come back.

* * *

**_XXIX: Repudiation_**

_(Next day)_

_(Morning; Twenty past four)_

It didn't really matter how much sleep Armin got the previous day (he had spent most of his time resting in bed with Eren), he still felt pretty tired. After spending most of his time in bed, he seriously didn't want to get up again. Same thing with Eren; It took a thick book to the head to get him to finally wake up. Short mumbles and deep yawns were the only things heard between the two before they left their dorm. Eren wasn't a morning person at all, but Armin eventually got himself together while they walked towards the stables to retrieve their mounts as instructed to. Goosebumps erupted on the surface of their skin on the way there, tightening the green cloaks they had around themselves in a vain attempt at keeping warm. The cloaks they were wearing had the Wings of Freedom embroidered over the back, which reminded Eren of the necklace he received as a late Christmas present (it was tucked safely into his shirt along with his key).

Armin shivered lightly when he opened the doors to the stables; The sudden warmth felt foreign to him after spending a long time in the cold. The brunette, however, didn't mind the warmth at all and yawned again as they stepped into the stables and closed the door as quietly as they could behind them. Even if they had successfully managed to close the door without it squeaking loudly, the horses were awake anyways, so it didn't matter. Armin saw that they weren't the first ones in the morning once he scanned the stables. A couple of horses had been taken from their stalls, the gates left wide open and the hay lightly disturbed with footprints.

Eren went to the nearest horse and unhinged the gate to its stall, earning a small snort of approval. The horse that he picked was a muscular stallion that stood 16.5 hands high and wore a shiny chestnut coat. His mane was lightly matted, and he shook his head to signal that. Eren immediately complied with the brush that hung from a nearby hinge, gingerly brushing the hair between his fingers. He couldn't deny that the horse was somewhat intimidating to him; Horse riding wasn't his best talent, considering the fact that he scarcely rides horses, nor does he tend to them. Yet he still had basic knowledge of how to [poorly] groom a horse and ride them comfortably, whereas Armin had much more experience in the two.

Armin enjoyed paying small visits to the stables. He would groom the horses' manes, mutter sweet things while he nurtured them with oats, occasionally taking the horse he favored most out for a ride with permission by the Commander. Out of all the other tall and muscular horses that were housed in this stable, he took quite a liking to one particular mare; Her name was Ilunabarra. She was gentle, yet hardworking, and her mane rarely matted or tangled after their rides. She was beautiful – frail, amorous, welcoming... she was similar to the blonde. Similar in very many ways, which he was greatly fond of. They were both... _strong_.

Very strong.

Ilunabarra affectionately nipped at his hair as soon as he opened the gate to her stall. While Eren brushed his horse's mane, the blonde caressed her snout and ran a hand up to the base of her forehead. He admired the pretty sprinkle of gray she had there. The mare snorted into the palm of his hand, clearly impatient to leave her stall and stretch her legs. Armin giggled lightly at this and untied her lead from one of the bars that surrounded the upper half of her stall. She nudged his shoulder with her snout and slightly leaned her head towards his touch. Armin's fingertips glided over her coat smoothly with no interruptions whatsoever; She had been washed and groomed the previous night, no doubt.

He continued to absentmindedly groom her mane with his fingers until he heard Eren's distant voice; "Hey Armin, you ready to leave yet or what?"

The blonde looked back over his shoulder and saw that Eren had already saddled his horse and held its lead in his hand. The stallion impatiently stamped his foot, demanding that they left sooner rather than later. Armin blushed softly in embarrassment and shook his head, dropping Ilunabarra's lead and searching the stables for a saddle. Eren raised an eyebrow at this.

"Won't he wander if you left the lead alone?"

"_She_ knows better," Armin corrected him. "and she wants a loose stall anyways. Let her enjoy her life for a bit,"

The brunette playfully rolled his eyes with a grin on his lips. Armin found a stray saddle perched atop a stack of hay not too long after. He retreated to his mount (he was surprised she didn't wander off like Eren predicted she would) and placed the saddle on her. As he tightened the straps and such, Eren received an impatient nip to his ear, which forced a faint whine out of the back of his throat. He absentmindedly reached a hand up to stroke the stallion's snout, only to be greeted by a rough appendage. As much as this should have disgusted him, he merely chuckled and patted his snout.

Armin watched this out of the corner of his eye and smiled; Thank god Eren accepted the horses as much as they accepted him. He lightly tugged on his mount's rein, and she immediately complied. Before they had the chance to leave the stables, the door opened behind them and they were greeted with an impatient 'tch'. They turned and saw the usual bored look; Ymir stood just over the threshold, with Krista yawning softly under her arm.

"Well, are you done yet?" she asked rudely.

"Just about," Armin replied with a polite smile, but his politeness was thrown back at his face as she rolled her eyes.

"I didn't think the Survey Corps accepted foals in their stables,"

Armin bit his lip in frustration; This wouldn't be the first time he heard that exact same sentence. "She's not a filly, she's been here for about three years now,"

A small voice sighed, "She's so pretty!"

Krista trotted away from Ymir (who pouted in disapproval) and brought her hands up to Ilunabarra's snout. The mare snorted lightly at this approach, yet she nudged her snout into the palm of Krista's hands anyways. The blonde lightly stroked her snout and mane, admiring the beauty of the horse under her fingertips. Armin watched with a smile on his face, but his attention was immediately switched to Eren when he tried to spark conversation with Ymir.

"How was your morning, Ymir?" Eren asked.

"You sound way too formal. What do you want?"

"Ymir! That wasn't very nice!" Krista scolded. The brunette scowled and turned her gaze elsewhere.

"Nothing, really," he replied with a mischievous grin.

"You know you're a terrible liar, right?"

The taller brunette rolled his eyes and crossed his arms over his chest. "If you can _obviously_ see right through my shit, then why don't you answer my question already?"

Ymir scowled at this retort and angrily balled her hands into fists at her side with frustration. "I simply used my head, unlike _some people -_" she looked Eren dead in the eyes as she emphasized those words, "- How hard is that to understand?"

"Very,"

"- You bastard,"

The stallion pulled lightly on his lead with the toss of his head once he sensed the sudden spike of frustration between the two. Eren payed no mind to this, but Armin, on the other hand, took this to consideration. While Krista complimented Ilunabarra with a highly expressive croon, Armin let go of the lead and cut between the two brunettes. Right now wouldn't be the best of times for them to argue, especially when they have someplace important to be.

"Look, we're really grateful for what you did," the blonde continued, "and Eren's just curious, that's all. But right now isn't the time to discuss this; We have a place to be before five-thirty hits,"

"Of course!" Ymir chuckled, "You wouldn't want Levi to open a can of whoop-ass on your boyfriend again!"

Eren blushed furiously in embarrassment while Armin shook his hands with a highly flustered look on his face. "T- That's not it, I assure you!"

"So you're saying you'd like to watch Eren get his sorry ass beat?"

The blonde let out a frustrated squeak, which only made her laugh harder. Krista gave a soft smile and hastened over to Ymir's side, saying, "That's enough, now – just look how embarrassed they are! But Armin's right, though. We have to sign in with Heichou in a couple of minutes, and... and I don't want to get in trouble!"

The shorter brunette tightly wrapped her arm around Krista, laughing, "That's my Krista!"

Armin giggled lightly at this and turned to Eren, who had already picked up Ilunabarra's lead. He took it in hand and guided her out of the stables with Eren following behind him. Ymir ignored them as they walked out, playfully squeezing Krista in her arms before searching for her own mount.

**o0o0o0o**

Numerous soldiers were already waiting in the front of the Survey Corps base, though most of them were complaining about being tired and hungry. Levi, of course, ignored their whining and waited for the rest of the soldiers to arrive. He stood in front of his own mount - a beautiful stallion with a silky black coat that stood a little over sixteen hands high - yawning deeply into the back of his hand. Erwin stood right next to him with a large hand on his shoulder, and he looked wide awake compared to the other soldiers there. Levi would occasionally look up at his lover, only to be greeted by a warm smile, and he could almost swear that Erwin didn't sleep at all last night. Just as he was about to question Erwin on the bags under his eyes, he was interrupted by a tired call.

"Heichou?"

The raven turned and saw Eren and Armin, who both immediately saluted. Their right hands balled into fists right over their hearts, their left hands clutching the reins of their mounts behind their backs. Levi raised an eyebrow at such a formal solute (considering that it was so early in the morning and hardly anyone was willing to raise a hand even to save their own life), but he brushed it off his shoulder.

"Took you two long enough," Levi said with a slight grin. "Arlert – that mare, what's her name again?"

"Ah – Ilunabarra," Armin squeaked.

"Take good care of her; That's one of Erwin's favorite horses. He'd beat your ass if anything happened to her,"

Erwin chuckled lightly and said, "Don't exaggerate, Levi! … Maybe just a scratch,"

Armin gave a weak smile at his joke and said, "I'll take good care of her,"

"I'm glad to hear that,"

Eren scanned the area and saw various soldiers that he was familiar with and a few of his superiors tiredly muttering to each other. Everyone there wore their cloaks; The cloaks were part of their uniform, and it was necessary to bring it along during missions and such. Levi shifted a bit under his cloak as he wrapped his arms around himself to keep warm. He reluctantly let his shoulders shake lightly with a shiver, which was immediately answered by Erwin's comforting arm. He was pulled closer towards the blonde's body, robbing him of his body heat. As much as Levi enjoyed the warmth, he was highly embarrassed of being held by his lover like that (he always hated the height difference). A flustered blush formed over his cheekbones and he excused Eren and Armin.

They obediently complied and left their superiors, though Armin was trying to muffle his breathy giggle when he heard Levi mutter something with a slightly flustered tone (_"Just try to kiss me, you damned giant," _if he heard correctly). As soon as he turned back to talk to Eren, however, he was interrupted by an excited squeal.

"Good morning!"

Armin's eyes widened with surprise as Hanji greeted them animatedly – it looked like she had a lot of energy in her, regardless the time of day they were in. "Morning, Hanji,"

"I swear everyone's dead, it's not even fun anymore," Hanji pouted. "Anyways, how was your morning, Eren? Armin? Found your horses all right?"

They replied in unison; "Yeah,"

"Good!" she clapped her hands together and added (with a softer tone so passersby wouldn't hear), "Oh, that reminds me - Armin, I have some experiments that we could test out. You know, I've never been this excited ever since my first experiment with Eren. To think that a human could survive with two Titan shifters' blood in their system? I wonder if you're a Titan shifter, too,"

Armin swallowed loudly, which earned him a concerned look from his lover. Eren replied for him, "No, I don't think Armin's a shifter like me,"

"But he can heal faster now," Hanji whispered excitedly, "I wonder if he can heal from a fatal injury, like a stab wound or a broken neck!"

The blonde squeaked in terror.

"I'm only messing with you, Armin," she laughed. "Don't worry about it. My experiments with you will only test out how fast you can heal from different types of wounds, like paper cuts and such. I won't go to the extent of throwing knives at you. I'm not trying to kill you,"

"... That's... reassuring...?" he replied weakly.

"It's necessary. But think about it – another Titan shifter! Ooh, I'm really excited! Do you -"

Eren cut her off. "Hanji, now wouldn't be the best time to discuss that. Maybe when we get to the interior?"

"Sure!"

She stalked off to talk to Nanaba, who was tending to her mount alongside Mike. They watched as she left, a small sigh of relief leaving Armin's lips. The topic of the possibility of him being a Titan shifter and being experimented on like Eren made him quite uncomfortable. To think that he'd be treated as someone's guinea pig. Now he had some sort of relation to how Eren felt when they talked of experimenting on him after the hearing. His thoughts were interrupted when he felt the brunette's hand snake around his shoulders.

"Are you all right?"

"I'm fine,"

His mount nipped affectionately on the collar of his shirt. He grinned softly as absentmindedly reached a hand behind him to stroke Ilunabarra's snout. Eren felt his heart rate decrease with relief at the sight of Armin's smile; It made him happy to see his lover smiling. He leaned in and planted a gentle kiss on his temple, watching as the grin on his face widened.

**o0o0o0o**

By five-thirty, all of the soldiers that had been called the day before arrived in front of the base with their mounts. There was no issues with Gear and such, or at least it looked like that, since most of the soldiers were too tired to even complain about their mounts being disobedient or the straps to their Gear frayed. The large greenery around the Survey Corps' base was beautiful; Armin payed more attention to the trees and such than to where he was going. To his greatest relief, Ilunabarra noticed his absentminded lead and decided to follow Mike's horse, who was galloping smoothly in front of them. Eren was placed right behind Armin, followed by Nanaba and a couple of older soldiers in the Survey Corps. Levi and Erwin were placed up front with Mikasa and Lynne.

The formation itself was pretty loose and care free; It's not like they were expecting to be ambushed on the way there. That thought alone was enough to make Armin's shoulders shake with a small shiver. Eren watched Ilunabarra's mane bounce lightly in time with her footsteps, along with Armin's coat fluttering behind him. Armin slightly rolled his hips in time with her movements to make the ride much more comfortable (rather than allowing himself to uneasily bounce on her back and hold on to the reins for dear life). He didn't give a second thought to his mount's actions – every time they turned, he allowed Luna to follow Mike's lead, yawning lightly into the back of his hand and tightening his grip on the reins every now and then.

Eren enjoyed watching Armin like this. He looked so full of life – innocent – _free_. As that thought came up to his mind, he reached a hand into his shirt and pulled out the Wings of Freedom. With one hand holding tightly onto the reins and the other on the necklace, he looked up and saw that they were approaching a nearby town. He dropped the Wings and allowed it to bounce lightly on his chest in time with his mount's rough movements, watching Erwin in front of him for further instruction. They neared the gates leading into the small town, and with the raise of the hand, they were slowed down to a trot. The sound of hooves hitting the cold ground was enough to bring most of the townspeople's attention to them, who immediately greeted the Survey Corps with smiles before returning to their own business.

Armin's grip on his mount's reins tightened significantly as his eyes scanned the streets; Even if wall Rose had been part of the 'interior' five years ago, it now looked like the streets of wall Maria – stray dogs begging for food from merchants, children being scolded for stealing bread, beggars lined up near the church, listening to the priest preach about the walls before giving the daily meal. It hurts to think that people were living like dogs (it reminded him heavily about Shiganshina, and thinking back to the day wall Maria was breached was still painful to the very day). Even if he didn't know too much about the towns, villages, and cities around Rose, he still knew that one thing was for certain; People care for one another in a small community.

Or should he really think so brightly about humanity's ways?

He decided to ignore the townspeople and pushed Ilunabarra into a faster trot once they neared the end of the city's main street. If humanity really was filled with unicorns and sparkles, the church and government wouldn't be so corrupted – merchants wouldn't be so greedy and soldiers wouldn't think themselves higher than the average man just because they wear a uniform – the prejudice wouldn't hate others for their beliefs... about the outside world. Armin's eyes dropped to his hands; He saw that his knuckles were whited with mixed emotions, his mount lightly flicking her head once she sensed his anger. He now remembers why his landscape book was torn and had smudged pages.

**.**

**.**

_"You'll burn in hell, just like the rest of them!" an angry voice snarled into his ear._

_He curled into a fetal position when another boy added, "The Military will be more than happy to come and help us smack some sense of reality into you!"_

_"You're living a fantasy!" Armin squeaked, tears running down his cheeks. "You're the ones that need reality smacked into – we live like caged birds! There's life beyond the walls! Life that needs to be explored by us!"_

_Armin gave a rather high-pitched sob once he felt a sharp pain in his side. The force of the kick pushed his frail body away from the spot of which he lay, the book he held in his hands immediately slipping out of his reach. His eyes widened as he skidded on the ground and came to an abrupt stop; Reaching out towards the book, he opened his mouth to yell, but all that came out was a terrified gasp. The bottom of one of the boy's shoes came in contact with the stem of the book. The boy stomped on the book, ripping the leather bound to it._

_"Stop it! Stop it!" Armin cried._

_"Quit trying to preach to us about the 'outside world'! It's not real!" he snapped, kicking the book off into the dark alleyway with an angry huff._

_"Give it back to me!"_

_"You're wanting to live a far-fetched fantasy, you weak piece of shit!"_

_Armin tried to get up on all fours, but he was pushed back into the ground as a foot stomped on his upper back. He shuddered violently as one of the boys let their weight pour onto his frail back, his hand weakly balling into a fist and retreating back to his face. He made to wipe his tears away, but instead, he bit into his knuckles to muffle his sobs. He didn't know how long he stayed in that painful position, but when the boy's foot left his upper back, he heard a familiar angry yell._

_"Burn in hell, asshole!"_

_"We'll shut you up, Eren!"_

_Armin watched through widened eyes as Eren punched the nearest boy to him. The other two boys grabbed his arms and held them back, each holding one in their own. Eren struggled against his restraints, only to be interrupted by a hiss. The boy he had punched struggled to his feet, massaging his eye (it was starting to swell). Armin sobbed harder when he saw his attacker raise his fist._

_"You're weak, just like him,"  
_

_"You're the only weak one around here,__"_

_Eren kicked his chest with all the force he could muster up in his angry frame, pulling against the other two boys' restraints and successfully bringing his arms back together. The two boys' foreheads met with a terrible crack, and with that, they fell to their knees on the floor with low groans. Eren massaged his forearms where he had been held, and footsteps rang behind him._

_"Eren,"_

_The monotonous voice had come from Mikasa, who was trotting down the alleyway. The leader of Armin's attackers struggled to his feet, only to be taken by the collar by Mikasa. She angrily curled her fist and punched his jaw with all the force she could gather within the second, her ruthless action and expression making him cry out in pain. She pushed him to the ground and stepped back to Eren's side. The three boys struggled to their feet and gave them one last hateful look before hastening off into the alleyway with muffled groans of pain. Once they were gone, both Eren and Mikasa looked down at Armin, who was curled up in a fetal position and crying freely into his sleeve._

_Eren bent down and ran a hand through Armin's hair. "Are you all right?"  
_

_Armin nodded vigorously, and he heard a monotonous voice behind him; "If you don't get up now, you'll catch a cold,"_

_"I'm sorry..."_

_Armin sat up and furiously rubbed his eyes. While he wiped his tears away, Eren reached a hand out towards him, the sudden movement making him flinch. He looked up and saw that Eren had a sympathetic smile on his face. It comforted him to see that, and he took Eren's hand. Once he had been successfully pulled onto his feet, Eren wrapped an arm around him and kissed his cheek. He sighed in relief as he felt he brunette's lips come into contact with his cheek; Kissing meant that the other person cared... right? So Eren cared for him. His thoughts were interrupted as Mikasa handed him his book, which had been torn down the spine and across the back. He hesitantly took the book from her hands._

_"Thank you..."  
_

_"There's no need for you to thank us," Mikasa stated._

_"Yeah, it's nothing!" Eren added._

_The blonde smiled brightly as he felt Eren kiss his forehead. Mikasa watched with a small grin on her lips and reached a hand out towards Armin._

"_Let's go – together,"_

_**.**_

_**.**_

… Together...

… Together.

Armin growled in frustration and accidentally pulled on Ilunabarra's reins, who snorted in protest and continued to follow Mike's lead anyways. He bit his lip and patted her head as an apology. He looked back over his shoulder at Eren.

Turquoise sparked against sky blue.

The blonde felt his heart flutter cheerfully once their eyes met, and he gave a bright smile before turning back to the front. His eyes rest on Mikasa, who was busy readjusting her scarf around her neck to keep warm. He sighed with relief. The three of them are still together – Eren still protected him – Mikasa still watches over the two of them like she would her own children... and what was more was that Armin finally proved to them that he wasn't 'weak' like everyone said he was. Here he was, alive and breathing freely, fulfilling the duty of a soldier and protecting the ones he loves. To hell with the people who try to tell him otherwise.

To hell with them all.

**o0o0o0o**

Armin didn't know how long it took, but he was bored to near death by the time they had arrived wall Sina. They were greeted by multiple Military Policemen, who were trotting proudly alongside them (they were assigned duty to 'protect' the Survey Corps, not that they needed it). While they walked beside their horses through the streets of the interior, numerous passersby whispered loudly to each other about the Survey Corps.

"Why are _they _here?"

"Isn't that guy a monster like the rest of them or something?"

"Look at that, even kids can become soldiers!"

"This is what our taxes go to?"

"That brat's a damned monster masquerading as one of us!"

"They should execute him already,"

These whisperes circled around them, and as much as Armin wanted to say something – _anything_ – he couldn't. He turned back to Eren, who flashed him a weak smile before turning away with a hint of hatred in his eyes. How Armin just wanted to go over there and hug him, kiss him, comfort him with soothing words to block out the harsh ones coming from the townspeople. Damned aristocrats. Living in the interior doesn't mean that they're any better than the people living in Rose's borders. Armin sighed and turned back to the front, biting his lip once he saw a pair of Garrison soldiers staring idly at him (and he almost recognized one of them, but he couldn't really put his finger on who it was). It made the blonde uncomfortable, and he tried his best to look at anything but the two soldiers. It wasn't until one of them called out to him until he made eye contact.

"Armin? I can't believe it! So that _is _Eren behind you!"

His eyes widened significantly; He didn't know that he had been trying his hardest to ignore Hannes. He was familiar with him, and so were Eren and Mikasa. Several passersby glared at the two soldiers before muttering some more bullshit about them and minding to their own business.

"Hey, Hannes!" Eren greeted cheerfully.

Mikasa looked back over her shoulder and flashed a small smile before returning her attention back to the front. She tucked her chin into her scarf and yawned lightly into it. They continued to walk, with Hannes deciding to join them for a minute before returning back to his own business.

"You guys better be careful, all right?" Hannes said to Eren. He lowered his voice (to the point where only Eren and Armin could here him speak), "The government isn't all unicorns and sparkles. I highly suggest you stay on your guard – even Commander Pixis is having a bit of trouble,"

"What do you mean?"

"That's a story for another day,"

Hannes stopped in his tracks and gave a small wave before returning back to his comrade. Eren raised an eyebrow at this while Armin processed his last sentence in his head (_'Even Commander Pixis is having a bit of trouble'_). Does that mean that there are ambushes and murders in the interior as well? Or is he just poking fun at them like he always did when they were kids? How frustrating. Armin licked his chapped lips before calling out to the Commander.

"Commander Erwin – sir?"

Erwin turned back to him and raised his eyebrow. "Hmm? Something wrong?"

"N- No, nothing's wrong," Armin continued, "I just wanted to know where we're going to stay in the interior. If we're going to carry out this missi -"

He was interrupted with a low hiss. "Now's not the time, Armin -" he leaned towards the younger blonde and lowered his voice, "we don't want the townspeople to know about this mission. How do you think they'll react?"

"Ah. I'm sorry," Armin nodded.

"There's no need to apologize,"

With that said, he grinned and turned his attention back to the front. Wherever they were going, Armin didn't know, but instead of fuming over Erwin's reluctance, he went over the mission plan in his head. If there was a flaw anywhere in the plan, now was the best time to find out, not at the last minute.

**o0o0o0o**

The day was going by terribly slow. Or at least it felt that way. The long god damn _migration_ to the interior was one hell of a way to make their soldiers yearn for breakfast. But the place that they were staying at wasn't all that bad – apparently a builder in the interior owed Erwin a favor and allowed them to stay in his cabins (God knows how the Commander met such a rich and well-known builder). The cabins were located deep into Sina's depths – a place where there was more greenery and less villages - where woodland surrounded them and small mountains were visible over the horizon. Their horses were tied to the trees outside, but their ropes were long enough for them to roam a little distance away from the tree to graze on the luscious grass. There were multiple cabins in the woodland, all spaced out nicely from campsite to campsite. Men and women, of course, were separated as they would be at their base (but that was only when they were to go to bed and such).

Mikasa nuzzled into her scarf while she lay at the foot of a large tree, along with Eren and Armin. Eren and Mikasa were laying down on the grass and enjoying their free time to rest, but Armin sat up against the tree and read his book instead. Eren muttered something about him being mental before dozing off, which only made a smile tug at his lips. Multiple soldiers were doing the same, resting together at the foot of trees or chatting with one another before they got their breakfast. Armin continued to read through his book, until a sudden movement caught his eye. He immediately flicked his eyes toward the direction of that movement, only to see that it was Ilunabarra mildly tossing her head as Eren's stallion tried to groom her. He sighed softly at this sight and continued to watch as the two horses snorted at each other before playfully nipping at each others ears.

"Something wrong, Armin?"

The blonde looked down to see that Eren was slightly curled on his side, gazing up at him through tired eyes. Armin gave a warm smile and closed his book, tossing it aside and crawling over to Eren's side. Once he laid himself comfortably near Eren, he was greeted with a soft peck to the forehead. He wanted to stay there and nuzzle comfortably by the brunette's side, but as soon as he moved to do so, a whistle was heard in the distance. Of course they'd be called right when he decided to settle down and rest for awhile. Eren groaned lightly and sat up while the raven got to her feet and brushed the grass and dirt off her lap and rear. The only one still sitting was Eren, who had been stretching and yawning into the palm of his hand.

Armin reached a hand out to him and said, "Weren't you complaining about how hungry you were earlier?"

"Shut up," the brunette replied and took his hand.

Mikasa watched as Eren kissed Armin's cheek with covetous eyes before turning her back towards them and muttering, "Let's go already – _together_,"

Armin's eyes widened; Didn't she say that before...?

"For some reason, that sounds familiar," Eren said before trotting off with Armin at his side. The raven simply stood there for a moment, but she didn't move until she heard Eren call out to her; "Hurry up, Mikasa! Didn't you say you wanted to go together?"

She gave the faintest of smiles and covered her mouth and nose with her scarf, starting at a light jog to catch up with them.

**o0o0o0o**

_(One hour later)_

_(Morning; Thirty past nine)_

Breakfast took a long time to get done and over with, and after an hour, most of the soliders were done with their food and proceeded onto socializing with their friends and lovers. There were many cabins around in the area that they had permission to use for the time being, so most of the soldiers were paired off with four to six people to one cabin. For the soldiers that lived in the barracks back at the base, sharing a housing area with six or more people was nothing, but the extra space was something different. There were at least two rooms in each cabin, so roommates were a must. There wasn't really anything to 'get used to' here at all, considering the fact that most of the things there pretty much the same as the thing back at the Survey Corps base.

Most of the soldiers were sent to do some cleaning around the cabins and dining hall by Levi, while others were sent with Erwin to a couple of meetings. Eren and Armin, however, were sent to Hanji to get some experimenting done, with a couple of other soldiers at her side to provide some help. The blonde gave Eren a pleading look before being hauled off to test out his healing abilities, while Hanji stayed behind to explain a thing or two to him.

"Listen, Eren – what do you think about the Female Titan?" Hanji asked.

"What do you mean?"

"What I mean is; Are you all right with the fact that Annie could be the Female Titan?"

Eren folded his arms above his chest and huffed. "Of course I do! Well... the chances that she isn't the Female Titan aren't exactly zero, but with the things that have been going on lately, she probably is. I'll crush her, Hanji. Even if the isn't the Female Titan, she'll pay for what she's done,"

Hanji gave a curious grin. "And what if I told you that Annie had been forced by someone stronger than her to do their will? Intimidation isn't unheard of,"

"What makes you think that anyone could intimidate her?" the brunette asked (but it sounded more like a demand).

"I don't know, what do you think?" she continued, "There's a lot of cruel people in this world. You can easily be used as a pawn, no matter how strong you are. Now, think of it – there isn't exact proof that Annie's the Female Titan, and if she was, what would have made her go after you during the 57th Expedition?"

Eren opened his mouth to reply, but he immediately closed it and processed her words in his head. What if Annie wasn't the Female Titan, and she was being manipulated by someone? Does this mean he's been wrongly judging his comrade? He shook his head in denial.

"That's... I don't know... if she was being forced this whole time, wouldn't she have done something by now?"

"What do you think the meaning of 'pawn' is, Eren?"

"... I don't know..."

Hanji clapped her hands together and sighed, "Don't worry about it, Eren! I'm only trying to poke around your head for a bit. You know, your reactions are the only thing that make me want to fool you again,"

"H- Hanji!" he whined in protest.

She laughed loudly and pranced off to find Armin, with Eren following behind her (though he was fuming over the fact that Hanji had decided to mess around with him). However... even if she _was _just pulling another one of her pranks... she certainly did give him something to brew upon until the day they planned to prove Annie's innocence. If he had to be honest... some part of him wished that Annie wasn't the Female Titan. He didn't know what to believe anymore.

Never before has repudiation been so confusing and frustrating.

**o0o0o0o**

_(Later that day)_

_(Evening; Forty-five past ten)_

"I swear to fuck, if I touch another brush, my hands are going to fall off," Eren groaned.

After the experiments were done, Hanji had taken the test results and sent them away to Levi, who immediately passed them brushes, buckets of water, and soap to scrub the floors of the cabins. After a long day of work, they were sent to an assigned cabin, and they shared their cabin with Mike, Gelgar, and (to Eren's greatest disappointment) Jean. Since the cabin had three rooms for people to use as a living space, Mike had his own room, while the other four shared theirs. It was understandable, since Mike had a lot of paperwork to finish and needed time alone to do so. But by the time they had settled in their rooms and gotten used to the cabin itself, Armin was highly surprised to see than Jean and Eren didn't have a go at each other _at all_ during the day.

Even if that fact was reassuring, it didn't exactly mean that during the next two or three days during transition that everything would be perfectly fine. But that wasn't something to brew on; Right now was the time to worry about the mission plan - the time to weed out the smallest of mistakes so nothing would go wrong. Nothing was to put their soldiers at a greater risk than they were already in... or was Armin just concerned about getting Eren back home, safe and sound? Even if his biased was getting the best of him, it still resulted in him taking the mission much more seriously, which was a good thing (he hoped).

They had their own beds to sleep in, but Eren and Armin payed no mind to this and shared their bed like they would most of the nights. Even if the beds weren't made for two people (but they were still slightly bigger than the beds in the Survey Corps base), they still managed. Armin buttoned up his nightshirt before joining Eren in his bed, who was flexing his sore fingers. He greeted the brunette with a soft kiss to the lips, and he threw the blanket over them.

Eren yawned deeply and asked, "Aren't you sleepy _at all_?"

"Kind of," the blonde replied.

"Kind of'? The hell are you made out of?"

"Steel?"

They chuckled lightly in unison. Eren wrapped his arms around his lover and pulled them much closer together, embracing him tightly. Armin sighed into his chest and snuggled comfortably, enjoying the warmth coming from the brunette after such a long day. The work they did was tiring, and he really didn't want to think about the experiments he did with Hanji (his arm was _very_ sore after healing so many times). While he pressed his forehead against Eren's chest, he felt something hard press against his skin. He looked up at Eren and raised an eyebrow.

"Are you wearing your necklace?"

"Both of them," The brunette replied.

"Isn't it uncomfortable, wearing two necklaces at the same time? And won't you get yourself strangled to death by wearing a chain and string around your neck?" he asked, poking at the string that was draped around his neck.

"Surprisingly enough, it's pretty comfortable," Eren replied. He unwrapped his arms from around the blonde's waist and reached into his shirt, taking out one of the two necklaces and continuing, "But it does get annoying, having to deal with two of them. Why don't you take one?"

As he removed the necklace, Armin saw that it was the one with his key. His eyes widened significantly as Eren tried to put it on him; It was his key - the key to his basement. Why would Eren trust him with something so valuable?

"Eren, what the hell are you thinking?! That's the key to your basement, I can't wear it!"

"What makes you think you can't?" he sighed and asked, "Do you really think I don't trust you?"

Armin shook his head and muttered, "No... that's not it..."

Eren took this chance to slip the necklace on his lover. He planted a small kiss on his forehead added, "I trust you with a lot of things, Armin, and giving you the key to my basement is nothing. I want you to have it, because I know you're a responsible person and I can count on you to take good care of it,"

"What makes you so sure that I would keep it safe?"

Eren chuckled lightly and pushed the blonde's chin up with his hand. Their eyes met, and before he leaned in to kiss his lover, he muttered against his lips, "You've saved Mikasa and I more than once. I've known you for more than half of my life, and what's more is that I love you, and I know I can count on you,"

Armin felt his heart flutter in excitement as their lips met. Those few sentences were enough to push his insecurities off a cliff, enough to make him feel as if he was going to burst with joy. He kissed Eren passionately, their lips dancing together as if moving along to a perfect melody, their arms embracing each other tightly. It was just so beautiful – so cheerful – so _peaceful_. What more could he ask for? He absentmindedly tucked the key into his nightshirt before running his fingers through Eren's hair, deepening their kiss further.

But it won't be long until peace begins to fray and misconduct gladly takes its place.

**o0o0o0o**

_(Sometime later that night)_

Armin woke up with a snort as he heard a sudden thud off in the distance. He blinked stupidly and brushed his bangs out of his face, propping himself up on an elbow to look around the room. His eyes adjusted to the dim lighting and he saw that he was still in the same room, with Eren snoring lightly beside him. He cleared his throat, only to feel a slightly painful prickling sensation at the base of his throat. Did he catch a cold? He slipped out of the covers (after pressing a kiss to Eren's cheek) and unlocked the door, trying his hardest not to make too much noise. He crept out of the room and into the hallway, in search of the kitchen for some water.

While he walked down the hallway towards the kitchen, he passed Jean and Gelgar's room (snoring was heard from their room as well), and as he neared Mike's room, he heard a muffled voice. At first, Armin thought that Mike was one to talk in his sleep, but it wasn't until he actually passed the room when he heard another voice talking with him. That second voice sounded familiar; He took a couple of steps back and hesitantly pressed an ear to the door, cautious not to make a sound.

"You're saying Arlert has the same healing abilities as Jaeger?"

"Yeah,"

Was Mike talking to... _Levi?_

"Why didn't you tell me earlier?" Mike asked.

"I would have, if Hanji wasn't too busy fucking around in her room doing god knows what with those results. Probably planning out the next twenty experiments for Arlert -" _(Armin squirmed lightly at this statement) _"- like she did with that shitty brat,"

"Does this mean he's a Titan shifter, as well?"

He heard Levi let out an irritated 'tch'; "I'm going to have to say no, but we're still not too sure about that. Even if we did have him prick himself with a sewing needle, he didn't really have determination to do anything, so we don't know if he's a Titan shifter or not. It's not like Jaeger would turn into a Titan if he bit his tongue while talking, so the same thing would apply to Arlert,"

"That makes sense," Mike agreed. "However... how does that even work? If a Titan shifter's blood is coursing through his own veins, then wouldn't he be able to turn into a Titan?"

"I thought about that, too, but according to Hanji, the Titans are more alike to us that we think -" _(Armin heard the raven sigh) _"- as much as I hate that idea, I may have to embrace it later on in life. If Titans do have similar DNA to humans, I'll bet you anything that Hanji would try turning herself into a Titan shifter,"

"What about Jaeger? So does his emotions effect his better judgment, or did she not test that out yet?"

"Hanji told me that Eren was going through denial on the topic once he processed that maybe Leonhart was innocent, after all. We're not going to know if it effects his actual shifting until the day we try to capture her, though – if she does prove her innocence, then this was all a waste of time,"

"That may be true... but really, if Arlert is a Titan shifter and accidentally turns into a Titan, wouldn't he lose control like Eren did at first and try to kill us?"

Armin felt his heart clench painfully with fear.

"If he does lose control, then I'll have to cut his sorry ass out of that thing -" _(There was a small pause, which Armin instantly recognized as Levi's hesitation) _"- or I'll kill him before he 'accidentally' murders his brat of a lover,"

… It hurts.

Armin pushed away from the door without a care in the world if they heard him or not. The happy mood he had beforehand was now thrown out the window. He ran off deeper into the hallway, but instead of returning to his room or going to the kitchen like he originally planned, he made his way to the restroom. He shook his head in painful repudiation; He's not a Titan shifter, and he most certainly _will not_ kill his lover. He skidded to a halt in front of the door that was earlier introduced as the restroom.

He'll prove his innocence to Levi.

* * *

**Extra Note: **Holy shit, it took me way too long to edit this chapter. I might not be able to update next week - my history/science projects aren't agreeing with me at the moment. I'll have a lot more planned out by then, I promise. By the way, I don't actually know how big a Military bed is, so I use my own bed as a type of guide since it's kind of small (but two people can manage to sleep in it if they don't mind the lack of space).

And no, the 'self harm' that was foreshadowed won't be as serious as it was in chapter 20 (Pain).


	30. XXX: Innocence

**Note: **Well, damn, that took awhile. Sorry about that. School hates me, and I never though I'd be successful at making cosplay. God, that was a crazy week. Anyways, the conversation in the beginning of this chapter finally pushed Armin's doubts out the window, so we're good, right? It also looks like Levi would go through the embarrassment to get the answers on the subjects he's been brewing on. I wanted to dive into Levi and Erwin's past, so please, don't mind me. I was itching to write that for a long ass time. There's some heavy language in this chapter and some display of Levi's soft side when it comes to his soldiers. I also wanted more Eremin in this chapter. The next chapter will continue off from the end of this once (it occurs in the same day), and like I said before, this fanfiction is rated M for a reason. You know full well what I mean by that.

Chapter 30... let's go.

* * *

_**XXX: Innocence**_

It didn't really matter just how strong or weak one was, did it? It didn't matter in the slightest if you were man or woman, tall or short – just about anything can happen. It hurts to think that. It hurts to think that the impossible could happen to someone who considers themselves frail and worthless. No... it didn't matter. Armin heard the faint click of the door opening some distance away behind him. He ignored it and hurried off towards the restroom with the sound of his own heart pounding against his chest ringing in his ears. It scared him to think that he'd kill Eren, it hurt him to think that he'd be a Titan shifter. Right now was the best time to check for that.

He was determined to protect Eren, not kill him.

Whether that was an actual determination one can depend on, he didn't know, but it was worth a try. He skidded to a halt in front of the bathroom door, and without another look, he opened it and hastened over the threshold. The candles around there were still lit (it looks as if one of them decided to be careless enough to leave a flame on at night), with the hot wax starting to drip off the side of the counter and spilling to the floor, hardening almost instantly. The faint smell of flowers was in the air, and he couldn't deny that it was somewhat soothing. The room was fairly lit with the candles around the room and the moonlight coming from the windows above him.

Armin didn't even bother closing the door [correctly] behind him. He carelessly pushed it in an attempt to close it, but it only creaked and stayed partially open. It didn't matter at the moment – the most salient thing to him now was his innocence. Or was he really innocent? Was humanity in general even considered 'innocent'? It's frustrating. He stared at himself in the dusty mirror, his face illuminated with the light of five or more candles, the skin under his eyes lightly darkened with fatigue. As footsteps were heard nearing the restroom, he hesitantly opened his mouth and brought his fist up to bite. Even after he counted to three in his mind, he still didn't do it. God damn. Why should he be scared? Scared of pain? Of mortification?

_'I'll protect Eren,'_

He sunk his teeth into his thumb and whined softly in pain and discomfort. Warm blood spurted over his teeth and lips, the taste of iron bringing a soft shiver down his spine. A second or two passed by before he removed his teeth from his skin and stared at the wound with a surprised look. His thumb pulsated lightly, the blood starting to dribble down to his wrist and into the sleeve of his nightshirt. Instead of reaching for a towel to clean up with, he tightened his fist and sunk his teeth into his whited knuckles. Another perturbed whine left the back of his throat as the door behind him creaked fully open. Levi walked into the room with Mike following behind him. Mike sniffed and scrunched his nose with a disgusted look on his face (probably from the smell of iron mixing terribly with flowers) while Levi pinched the bridge of his nose in disappointment.

"Just what the fuck do you think you're doing, Arlert?"

Armin dropped his fist to his side and faced back towards Levi with a trace of blood left on his teeth and lips. "H- Heichou... does that prove to you that I'm not a Titan?"

"You're a disgusting little shit, you know that?" Levi sighed. He turned to the cabinet nearest to him and continued angrily, "I'll clean it for you. Remember one thing for me; You're not a cat, don't go skulking around like one,"

Armin laughed weakly and nodded. The raven rolled his eyes and pulled out a roll of bandages and said to Mike, "We continue our conversation tomorrow. Just go to bed already – I'll leave after I bandage this brat,"

Mike sniffed again before nodding and saying, "Lock the door when you leave, all right? Arlert, go to bed right after this, we have a busy day tomorrow,"

The blonde watched as Mike left, and he even had the courtesy to smile before closing the door behind him. Well, damn – how embarrassing was that? Armin flinched once Levi took his injured hand, which earned him another 'tch' of disapproval.

"What do you think you're doing out this late, brat?" he asked harshly.

"I j- just wanted to get some water, Heichou..."

"How does getting water lead you to eavesdropping on our conversation?" Levi rolled his eyes as he poured a generous amount of alcohol on a folded piece of cloth and dabbed it onto Armin's wounds (who flinched at the sudden stinging sensation around his hand). "Look, as much as I'd hate to say this, I will make the necessary murders to keep the rest of my soldiers safe and sound. Surely you understand that, at the very least?"

Armin opened his mouth, but he said nothing; It took him by full surprise that Levi was actually very _gentle _when dealing with his wounds. The blonde always thought that his superior was harsh with most of the things he did, and some part of him thought that he was going to purposely hurt him when 'cleaning' his wounds. This night couldn't get even weirder than that, could it? It wouldn't be wise to think of that... chances are probably great that he'd end up jinxing himself.

"I understand that perfectly, sir," Armin finally replied and watched as the raven wiped the blood and alcohol away with a separate towel. "But... aren't you tired? Shouldn't you be heading off towards your cabin rather than staying behind and cleaning up my mistake?"

Levi frustratingly growled and applied pressure to his wound with the cloth, earning a small gasp of pain. "Do you consider yourself less than any other soldier, you little shit? Most of the soldiers here only signed up so they get food and drink before they go to bed. Erwin and I are surprised that you actually try to contribute to humanity despite being physically frail. I hate hearing my soldiers talk as if they're worth the dirt under my fucking boot,"

This left Armin completely dumbstruck. The pregnant silence only told him to continue.

"Either way, I'm going to have to get up in two or three hours, so it'd be a shit ton easier if I just drank my coffee and got started on my paperwork. But if I do knock out, I know for certain that Erwin would be after my blood,"

"Sir... what _is _your relationship with Commander Erwin?" Armin asked with a highly innocent tone.

He paused for a moment before reaching for the roll of bandages and wrapping it around the blonde's hand. "My relationship with Erwin... you're asking for our history? What makes you think I'd tell you something like that?"

"I'm sorry... I just... you're right here in front of me, and I was curious..."

Levi sighed and said, "Don't worry about it, brat. Let's make a deal -" _(Armin bit his lip with worry) _"- I tell you my story if you answer answer any one of my questions honestly,"

Armin stayed silent; That sounded like a decent offer, but surely there's something behind it? "... All right,"

"Very good," the raven cut the end of the bandages from the roll and set his tools aside. He took a few steps back and leaned against the wall right next to the door, folding his arms above his chest. "So you want to know my 'relationship' with Erwin, do you?"

"Y- Yes..."

Levi huffed in a silent laugh and said, "Arlert, this conversation never leaves this room, you hear?"

He nodded vigorously and said, "Er... of course, sir!"

**.**

**.**

_"Levi? I can't believe it,"_

_Levi yawned deeply as a familiar voice was heard somewhere next to him. He didn't even bother looking around to see who it was; He simply sat there, his head tilted to the side, his eyes heavy with fatigue. His wrists throbbed painfully as he weakly tried to pull against the ropes that bound him together; His arms were tied behind an old wooden chair, but the reason why was still quite blurry to him at the moment. The prison cell he was in was cold and dark – the only source of light was from the torches outside in the hallway. They weren't even generous enough to leave him with a stiff bed like most of the other prisoners... not that he was going to need it, anyways. By the looks of it, his execution wasn't too far away._

_"Levi?"_

_He blinked a couple of times before readjusting his head to a more comfortable position._

_"Levi, answer me. I don't like being ignored,"_

_"What the fuck do you want?"_

_The raven looked up (he groaned lightly as his neck throbbed painfully) and saw a man gripping onto the rusted bars of the prison cell. He had blonde hair that was combed to the side and wore a soldier's uniform that bore two wings crossing over each other on the front. Levi growled and rolled his eyes; He met this person before. It was Erwin, a soldier from the Recon Corps (or was it Survey Corps?) that had talked to him a couple of weeks ago. Their conversation was very brief, mainly because he was too eager to leave and return to his friends. Or were they even friends? They were more like partners, or comrades._

_"So you've finally landed yourself in prison, huh? Proud of yourself?" Erwin asked._

_Levi straightened up in his seat and grunted lightly with relief from the popping in his back. "Who gives a shit about who's proud and who isn't? God knows what will happen now. Maybe they'll put me out of my misery already? It's not like I have somewhere to go if I do manage to get out of this hell hole,"_

_"You don't have somewhere to go? What do you mean by that, Levi?"_

_The raven answered, "The people that I ever cared about died. Like my mother - she's dead because of me. I no longer have a home, mainly because she tried to fight the Military Police to get me back, and she got herself shot right in the chest like a motherfucker. Life's a bitch, isn't it?"_

_Erwin leaned against the bars and stated, "You don't even sound like you're hurting. How come you're so open?"_

_"The only reason why I'm running my fucking mouth is because I'm probably going to die after this. Whether it's an actual execution or by starvation, I'm going to die sooner rather than later,"_

_"Who says you're going to die?"  
_

_"It's obvious, sir. As much as I'd hate to admit it, I'm tiny, and I've seen much more than the average teenager should,"_

_Erwin watched as Levi yawned once more and drooped his head down towards his lap, his eyes fluttering shut. It almost hurt to see him like this – it felt like yesterday when he first met the teen. He was young, innocent – hurting over his deceased friend. What else made him turn in such a direction?_

_"You're not going to die," the blonde said with a firm tone, regaining Levi's attention._

_He merely peeked up at him through his mass of tangled hair and asked, "How do you know?"_

_"I know you're going to live because you're joining the Survey Corps with me,"_

_At that instant, the raven sat up correctly once more and shouted, "What the fuck do you think I am?! There's no way I'll join your shitty Military branch – even if I wanted to, I wouldn't get the chance because of the things I've done!"_

_"Consider this an act of expiation, if you must," Erwin replied calmly. He watched as Levi opened his mouth to flare, but was instantly hushed as he continued, "However, if you refuse to join me in the Survey Corps, I will make sure you're executed in the worst way possible for stealing our Maneuver Gear and nearly killing one of our soldiers and a few other teenagers your age,"_

_"I – I don't – why – ugh!"_

_"You can't run away, Levi. I know you fear death. I can see it in your eyes. You're scared about death being painful, you're scared of the though that you may be descending into hell for the things you've done. You don't know what to do, and the only thing that comforts you is the thought that you'll be able to meet your deceased family and friends in the after life. Am I correct?"_

_Levi growled and furiously pulled against his restraints, his chair squeaking in agony. "Shut the fuck up! That's... That's not true! I'm not scared of death, I'm not scared of anything!"_

_"That's really cute," Erwin chuckled lightly, earning a venomous glare. "If you don't accept my offer, you'll be facing your worst nightmare. The Survey Corps are more than willing to train you and mold you into a successful soldier, and you'll be under my command, which means that you won't be doing any more crime around the underground without me knowing,"_

_"I... I don't..." the raven bit his lip in frustration, hissing lightly as he felt his skin tear and blood spurt out from the wound. "God damn it... do I even have a choice here?"_

_"Yes, you do. You have two; One, you join me and rebuild your reputation, or two, you continue the way you're living now and get yourself executed by yours truly. Would you like that mortification to weigh you down? I'd be more than happy to take our Gear back and punish you for the things you've done,"_

_"Shut up... just shut up already!" Levi spat._

_"Facing defeat yet, Levi? Swallowing your pride? Saving your own life?"  
_

_"Fine!" he screeched. "Fine! I'll join the Survey Corps! Are you happy now, asshole?!"_

_Erwin smiled brightly and replied with a cheerful tone, "Of course I am. Welcome to the Survey Corps, Cadet Levi,"_

**.**

**.**

_Levi squirmed lightly as Erwin tightened the belts to his uniform around his thighs and legs. "I'm not a little kid, Erwin – and why are these supposed to be so tight? It fucking hurts,"_

_"The way you taught yourself how to use the Gear is different from how we learned," Erwin replied, tightening the last strap and handing him his boots. As Levi took his boots with a sneer on his face, he continued, "It's common safety for using the Gear. So, what do you think so far? How do you like the Survey Corps?"_

_Levi sighed and replied lazily, "Most of the soldiers here are ignorant assholes, the food tastes much better than the shit I ate at home, I still hate you for forcing me into this, and I hate the skyscrapers that try mocking me while we train,"_

_"You're very straightforward," the blonde laughed._

_Levi slapped the hands that tried to tighten his gear any further and finished pulling on his boots. He clucked his tongue impatiently and scanned the office for a mirror. Erwin stood up from his knees once the raven trotted off towards the nearest mirror and examined himself thoroughly. Levi was surprised by the way he looked – the sharp uniform, stunning undercut, a face free from dirt and grime. It was just so foreign. He looked back when he felt Erwin's hands on his shoulders and blushed in embarrassment from the amused look on his face._

_"Different, isn't it?"_

_Levi growled lightly and slapped his hands away, stalking off towards the desk. Erwin ignored this and readjusted the collar of his shirt while looking in the mirror. The blonde couldn't deny that he felt somewhat accomplished for helping Levi and recruiting him into the Survey Corps – he might just become the solider they've been looking for. As he sunk deeper into his own thoughts, a sudden glint in the corner of his eye brought him back to reality. He instantly spun back and grabbed Levi's wrist with a painful amount of force; The raven had ran at him with a pair of scissors that was on his desk, a look of pure hatred and disgust in his eyes._

_Levi hissed in disapproval and dropped the scissors, bringing his free hand up in a fist and attempting to deliver a swift blow to Erwin's jaw. His fist was easily caught in Erwin's large hand, his knuckles cracking once his superior tightened the grip around his fist._

_"Fuck you!"_

_"Calm down, Levi,"_

_"Let go of me, you shitty giant!"_

_"Only if you grow up and quit trying to kill me,"_

_The raven sneered as he pulled against his restraints, which only tightened. "Let go of me already!"  
_

_Erwin shook his head, earning another vicious flare._

_"Your blood is mine, bastard! I'll fucking murder you with my bare hands! I'll -"_

_Levi's threat was immediately interrupted as he felt an overwhelming pain at the pit of his stomach. The blonde had sunk his knee into Levi's gut with most of his force; This knocked all of the oxygen out of the raven's lungs and made him slump over his knee while gasping for air. His arms became limp as he writhed in pain, and once Erwin let go of his fists, he sunk to his knees and coughed uneasily. His superior watched as Levi wrapped his arms around his stomach, glaring at him through hateful eyes – there was also a very faint trace of tears in them._

_Erwin knelt down and ran a hand through Levi's hair. The raven didn't even bother resisting; He merely stayed still and uneasily watched as Erwin caressed the top of his head and trailed his hand down to his chin. His face was forced up to meet Erwin's, and he saw that his superior had a [very] concerned look in his eyes. Just what the hell was that all of a sudden?_

_"Listen to me – I don't want to hurt you at all. I did this to help you,"_

_"... Why?"  
_

_"Why what?"_

_"Why are you doing this for me? Why is it that you care?"_

_The blonde merely smiled and stood up, offering him a hand. "You hold potential, Levi. You can do a lot of things in this life. I believe in you, and I trust you, just as you should trust me,"_

_Levi hesitated for a moment before taking his hand and being helped to his feet. "... If you really do trust me... then I guess I'll swallow my pride and follow you like the 'obedient ' little cur I am,"_

_"Thank you,"_

**.**

**.**

_Erwin neatly stacked a pile of papers on his desk and watched as the clock's hands twitched to a new number as each minute passed by. He recently summoned Levi to his office, but he hasn't shown up yet. Where was he? The blonde yawned into the back of his hand and flicked his eyes towards the door when he saw the knob turn. The door slowly opened, revealing Levi, who wore the usual expressionless look on his face. Erwin stood up from his seat and greeted him with a bright smile._

_"Evening, Levi! Everything all right?"_

_"I suppose,"_

_Levi snapped the door shut behind him and sat down in the seat in front of Erwin's desk, rolling his eyes at the smile he wore on his face. The blonde sat back down in his seat and raised an eyebrow; Despite Levi wearing an expressionless look, there was also a trace of mortification and worry in his eyes._

_"Are you sure you're all right?"  
_

_Levi clucked his tongue in frustration. "Why are you asking?"  
_

_"It's not about the recent mission, is it?"  
_

_The raven folded his arms and stared at his lap. The mission he returned from a couple of days ago had been his first mission beyond the walls... and hell, did it scare him. Watching his comrades get eaten alive, screaming for help and crying as they faced their horrible fate. The back of his neck prickled uneasily, which signaled that Erwin was still watching him._

_"... Well, a real Titan is different than the fake ones we hunt down in the training course," Levi muttered reluctantly._

_"Is that so?" the blonde stood up from his seat and walked around the desk. "Stand,"_

_Levi obeyed this command – as soon as he stood from his seat, he felt Erwin's arms wrap around him. The sudden warmth was welcomed; He didn't even bother pulling away or complaining. He accepted the embrace and gripped his superior's forearms. He nuzzled into Erwin's dress shirt and groaned._

_"Erwin, why is it that I was one of the very few that lived?" he asked. "It's fucking frustrating,"_

_"When you first joined the Survey Corps, didn't I tell you that you that you held great potential?"_

_The raven looked up at him and said, "I wouldn't have thought that the monsters beyond the walls were like that... but the way you raised me in my teenage years prepared me for that. I guess you can say I'm grateful. Yeah, why not?"  
_

_For some reason, that hurt Erwin._

_"... Yes. I helped you through your teenage years like any other person would,"_

_Levi pulled away from the embrace and rolled his eyes. "Let's not get personal. We have much more bullshit to worry about than the concept of my shitty teenage years with you. Don't you have to finish that report for the interior?"_

_Erwin's smile slightly faltered as he replied, "Yeah, I'll get onto that. Why don't you go back to the barracks and rest for a while?"_

_"Gladly,"_

**_._**

**_._**

"... So after awhile... you and Commander Erwin got closer to each other?" Armin asked with an awed tone.

Levi nodded as he yawned into the back of his hand. "I was more of an innocent shit back when I first reached adulthood than now. I actually thought that he was caring for me like any other sibling would. I wouldn't have thought that he'd become my lover at first. Life has a weird way of playing games, doesn't it?"

"Yes, sir,"

He looked out the window and saw that the moon was already starting to fade away in the distance. Did they really spend that much time awake? Erwin was sure to hunt him down and scold him for not getting his rest. But that just meant that now was his turn.

"Arlert, you are to answer me truthfully, understood?"

Armin answered with a soft yawn, "Of course,"

"I've heard a lot of shit the past few weeks," Levi slightly narrowed his eyes and continued, "Tell me what happened between your shitty brat of a lover and me,"

The blonde felt his face burn with a highly flustered blush; It sounded more like a demand than it did a question. What was more was that the kiss Eren and Levi shared brought so much agonizing thoughts and pain to him... he felt weak thinking back at it now. Levi continued to stare with an unimpressed look on his face, but at least he was being patient.

Armin brushed it off his shoulder and said, "I'm not sure what you've heard, but if it was about Eren robbing your lips, then yes, it's true,"

Levi gave a mildly disgusted look and asked, "Have I lost your respect for doing so?"

"Ah... I... I don't look at you any differently..."

"It's not that I really care, I just want to make sure my comrades trust me as I trust them,"

"... Oh,"

They stood in an awkward silence for a moment before Levi said, "I want to know something, Arlert. Why is it that you cringe at the thought of being a Titan shifter? Are you afraid of the Titans to the point where you wouldn't want anything to do with them? And if that's true, then why are you even sharing the same room as Jaeger?"

"... You said only one question, sir..." the blonde replied weakly.

"I told you much more than necessary, you little shit. It would only be fair," he stated.

"... I- It's not that I'm scared of the Titans. Well... I won't deny that I have some sort of fear towards them – everyone does, except for maybe you or Hanji. I only cringe at the thought of being a Titan shifter because... because if Eren had problems controlling his Titan and attacked Mikasa in the middle of a mission... w- what makes you think I'd do any better? Think of it, Heichou... I may be smart, but I'm certainly not that strong. But I've already proved that I'm not a Titan... so I wouldn't have to worry about Hanji dragging me into her lab to do experiments like she did with Eren,"

"I guess that's understandable," the raven yawned into the back of his hand and continued, "Being a Titan shifter doesn't matter in this world. At the end of the day, we're still human, and we all share a similar place here – a fucked and corrupted life. I want you to pay more attention to the plan we have set rather than the little things happening around you right now. We want to carry it out in two or three days' time, and we'll need all the help we can get to make sure that the mission is successful. You understand, don't you?"

Armin nodded vigorously. "Sir, I'll do my best, just as any other soldier would,"

"Not everyone is as innocent as you may think, brat. If Jaeger's going to go through some kind of denial because one of his close comrades happens to be the Female Titan and fails this mission, I'll make sure he never sees daylight again,"

"Of c- course...!"

He rolled his eyes at Armin's stutter and added, "Also, if you don't show up on time for the meeting in a couple of hours from now, you're going to scrub the floors in the kitchens until your hands are raw,"

Armin's eyes widened at this threat and he said, "I'll get some rest, sir! But... what about you...?"

"I'll get some coffee and life will be just fucking dandy," the raven sighed.

With that said, he unfolded his arms and left the leaning position he was in against the wall. He opened the door and left Armin in the restroom alone to process the conversation they just had. Levi... wasn't as bad as he thought. He may be harsh, but he cared. That was... reassuring... in a sense. The blonde's thoughts were interrupted as he yawned deeply, and he walked out of the restroom and heard the distant sound of the front door being shut. As soon as he left, the candles that were barely alive and flickering weakly against the leftover wax of the candles died out and left in a thin line of smoke. The room was now left to shine in the dull moonlight, the scent of flowers diffusing into the hallways.

He made his way towards his room with hardly a thought in his mind. He was too tired to think of anything else. Once he entered his room and locked the door behind him, he yawned once more and made his way to Eren's bed. It was hard to believe how much of a heavy sleeper Eren was; He was laying on his back and snoring quietly. The blonde stood there for a moment before carelessly allowing himself to collapse on the bed. Most of his weight had poured onto Eren, who grunted in discomfort at the sudden movement and reluctantly opened his eyes.

He heard brunette's sleepy voice, "Armin, what the hell? Are you all right? – Armin?"

Armin shook his head and muttered nonsense before he knocked out. Eren sighed with a light laugh and readjusted himself for a bit so they weren't so close to the edge. He wrapped his arms around his lover and whispered a slurred 'good night' before falling asleep as well.

**o0o0o0o**

_(Next day)_

_(Noon)_

The wind lightly brushed Armin's hair as he nurtured his mount with oats. She gladly ate the food from the palm of his hand while he sleepily muttered compliments towards her. He was still tired from sleeping so late, but the coffee he drank that morning was helping him greatly. Somewhere off in the distance, Eren was chasing a butterfly like he used to when they were kids. He reached out to capture it in his hand, but it always managed to fly away. He was starting to think that the butterfly was actually mocking him by now with the amount of times it nimbly dodged his hand. They were done with the chores that they were set to do and they were granted the freedom to roam the area and enjoy their time as they wanted. Various soldiers had finished their work early as well, but instead of tending to their mounts or playing with the wildlife, they gossiped under the shade of trees and enjoyed each others company.

He was mildly distracted as Ilunabarra nipped his ear in a demand for more oats, and while he reached into the bag next to him and brought out another handful, he heard Eren's amused voice in the distance, "You're mocking me, aren't you?"

Armin's attention was turned back to Eren, and he laughed cheerfully at the sight; The butterfly was perched on the tip of his nose, its wings stretched out and twitching every now and then. Eren blinked a couple of times before he reached up to touch the butterfly. It immediately fluttered out of his reach and circled his head once as if it were toying with him. It finally flew off and his in the mass of branches and leaves above them, leaving Eren to groan in fatigue and make his way back to the blonde's side.

Once Armin caught his eye, he snickered, "Having fun there?"

"You'd be tired too if you were chasing that little shit around like a cat," Eren snapped playfully. He stretched his back and added, "You should have joined me,"

"I don't think Luna would let me," the blonde replied as he gestured towards his mount, who was still feeding off the palm of his hand.

"That's mean!" Eren pouted.

He wrapped his arms around his lover anyways, who whined in protest. Ilunabarra snorted uneasily and stamped the ground as if she were trying to kill an insect. She finished the oats he offered her, and instead of demanding for more, she left him and wandered off in the distance her lead allowed her to. Armin wiped off the leftover bits of oats from his hand onto his jeans while Eren playfully nibbled on the shell of his ear, his arms still tightly wrapped around him. Armin squeezed out of his lover's hold and turned back to protest, but he was immediately interrupted as Eren's lips captured his. The sudden kiss surprised him, but he accepted it anyways; He wrapped his arms around Eren's neck and deepened the kiss while Eren loosely held onto his waist.

Armin broke away from the kiss and asked, "Eren, are you worried about tomorrow?"

"About the mission?" the brunette quickly pecked his lips and answered, "There's nothing to worry about,"

"I'm glad to hear that,"

Their lips came into contact once more, and the hold Eren had on his lover's waist tightened. They broke away from the kiss momentarily with their eyes still shut before Eren leaned in and started to passionately kiss Armin. He moved his lips slowly and lovingly against Armin's, enjoying the soft feel of his lips. Say Armin died on their mission tomorrow... would this be their last kiss? Armin's bright eyes, playful kisses, and sweet compliments... he'd miss those things way too much. Eren gently pushed the blonde back against the tree and deepened their kiss further. Now wasn't the time to think about that; Worry would be his kingdom come.

They reluctantly pulled away from each others lips and panted lightly to catch their breath from such a passionate kiss. Eren nuzzled into Armin's bangs and muttered sweet nonsense, earning a small giggle of approval. Armin absentmindedly pressed light kisses against his jawbone and chin while he breathed in his scent. How soothing it was, how reassuring.

"Armin, be careful, all right?" Eren muttered into his hair.

"Same goes for you,"

Once their eyes met, the blonde gave him a bright smile. Eren pressed another kiss to Armin's lips and moved his hand up to his face to brush his bangs away from his eyes. The brunette tucked the hair behind his ear and kissed his forehead.

"You're beautiful,"

"What's that all of a sudden?"

"I'm not allowed to compliment you now?"

"... Shut up, Eren,"

Armin rest his head on his lover's shoulder sighed with relief. The things that have been happening recently – he proved his innocence, Levi basically apologized to him (in his own little way), and Eren was being a little more affectionate that usual – it was all so perfect. He couldn't be happier. When he looked up from Eren's shoulder, he saw in the distance that two of the newer female recruits were watching them with blushes on their cheeks and their hands covering their mouths to muffle the giggles that spilled from their lips. A flustered blush found its way onto Armin's cheeks as he buried his face into the brunette's shoulder in embarrassment.

Eren sensed this and asked, "What's wrong?"

The blonde whined lightly and answered, "We're giving such a display of affection, and it looks like those two soldiers over there are enjoying it,"

"Is that so?"

Eren tightened the hold he had on Armin's hips and lifted him off the ground with ease. The blonde let out a surprised squeak at this sudden action and weakly kicked his legs in an attempt to get Eren to put him back down. He was now looking down at the brunette, who was wearing a very amused grin. He opened his mouth to furiously protest, but he was interrupted by Eren's soft lips. His blush intensified greatly when he heard an excited squeal in the distance.

How embarrassing.


End file.
